WWE Fan Fiction ❯ WWE does the Breakfast Club ❯ Chapter 6 ( Chapter 7 )

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Next One.



Everyone is there waiting for Firefly.

Orton: Here I thought we were finally getting it down.

Hunter: Would you shut up.

Firefly comes walking in.

Firefly: Ok people places please.


Cena: Sporto...
Shawn: What?
Cena jumps down and goes next to Shawn.
Cena: You get along with your parents?
Shawn: Well if I say yes, I'm an idiot, right?
Cena: You're an idiot anyway...But if you say you get along with your parents well you're a liar too!
Cena turns and walks away from him.
Shawn follows and pushes Cena.

Orton: Hey Michaels! Thats not very nice. He was walking away.
Hunter, Steve, and Jeff: SHUT UP ORTON!
Firefly is getting a headache and we are only a little of the way through.

Shawn: You know something, man...If we weren't in school right now, I'd waste you!
Cena: points his middle finger at the floor.
Cena: Can you hear this? Want me to turn it up?
Cena flips his hand around so he is now giving Shawn the bird. Kenny comes over and puts a hand on each of the guy's shoulders.
Kenny: Hey fellas, I mean...
Shawn pushes away from Kenny.
Kenny: ...I don't like my parents either, I don't...I don't get along with them...their idea of parental compassion is just, you know, wacko!
Cena turns to Kenny.
Cena: Dork...
Kenny: Yeah?
Cena: You are a parent's wet dream, okay?
Cena starts to walk away.
Kenny: Well that's a problem!
Cena: Look, I can see you getting all bunged up for them making you wear these kinda clothes. But face it, you're a Neo-Maxi-Zoom-Dweebie! What would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen?
Shawn: Why do you have to insult everybody?
Cena: I'm being honest, asshole! I would expect you...to know the difference!
Shawn: Yeah well, he's gotta name!
Cena: Yeah?
Shawn: Yeah, (to Kenny) What's your name?
Kenny: Kenny...
Shawn: See...
Cena (to Kenny) My condolences...
Cena walks away.
Trish: (to Cena) What's your name?
Cena: What's yours?
Trish: Trish...
Cena: Trish?
Trish: Trish...it's a family name!
Cena: Nooo...It's a fat girl's name!
Trish: Well thank you...
Cena: You're welcome...
Trish: I'm not fat!
Cena: Well not at present but I could see you really pushing maximum density! You see, I'm not sure if you know this...but there are two kinds of fat people. There's fat people that were born to be fat, and then there's fat people that were once thin but they became fat...so when you look at them you can sorta see that thin person inside! You see, you're gonna get married, you're gonna squeeze out a few puppies and then, uh...
He mimes becoming fat, making noises. Trish gives him the finger.
Cena: Oh...obscene finger gestures from such a pristine girl!
Trish: (resentfully) I'm not that pristine!

Hunter: She can say that again.

Cena bends down closer to Trish.
Cena: Are you a virgin? (a beat) I'll bet you a million dollars that you are! Let's end the suspense! Is it gonna be... (another beat) ...a white weddin?
Trish: Why don't you just shut up?
Cena: Have you ever kissed a boy on the mouth? (a beat) Have you ever been felt up? Over the bra, under the blouse, shoes off...hoping to God your parents don't walk in?
Trish is getting upset.
Trish: Do you want me to puke?
Cena: Over the panties, no bra, blouse unbuttoned, Calvin's in a ball on the front seat past eleven on a school night?
Shawn: Leave her alone!
Cena slowly stands and faces Shawn.
Shawn: I said leave her alone!
Cena: You gonna make me?
Shawn: Yeah...
Cena walks over to where Shawn is standing.
Cena: You and how many of your friends?
Shawn: Just me, just you and me. Two hits. Me hitting you, you hitting the floor! Anytime you're ready, pal!
Cena goes to hit him but Shawn gets Cena down on the ground with a wrestling move.
Cena: I don't wanna get into to this with you man...
Shawn gets up.
Shawn: Why not?
Cena gets up.
Cena: 'Cause I'd kill you...It's real simple. I'd kill you and your fucking parents would sue me and it would be a big mess and I don't care enough about you to bother.
Shawn: Chicken shit...

Hunter: Thats a little better then buttface.

Shawn turns and walks away.
Cena takes out a switchblade and opens it. He stabs the switchblade into a chair.
Shawn: Let's end this right now. You don't talk to her...you don't look at her and you don't even think about her! You understand me?
Cena: I'm trying to help her!.
We see the janitor, COACH come into the room.
Coach: Kenny, how you doing?
Cena: Your dad works here?
Kenny is embarrassed.
Cena: Uh, Coach?
Coach: What?
Cena: Can I ask you a question?
Coach: Sure...
Cena: How does one become a janitor?
Coach: You wanna be a janitor?

Steve: A good part for the Coach.

Cena: No I just wanna know how one becomes a janitor because Shawn here, is very interested in persuing a career in the custodial arts...
Coach: Oh, really? You guys think I'm just some untouchable peasant? Peon? Huh? Maybe so, but following a broom around after shitheads like you for the past eight years I've learned a couple of things...I look through your letters, I look through your lockers...I listen to your conversations, you don't know that but I do...I am the eyes and ears of this institution my friends. By the way, that clock's twenty minutes fast!
Everyone groans. Cena smiles.
Shawn: Shit!
Vince'S OFFICE
The clock says 11:30. Vince gets up and leaves.
LIBRARY
Cena starts to whistle a marching tune and everybody joins in. Vince enters. Cena begins to whistle Beethoven's 5th.
Vince: Allright girls, that's thirty minutes for lunch...
Shawn: Here?
Vince: Here...
Shawn: Well I think the cafeteria would be a more suitable place for us to eat lunch in, sir!
Vince: Well, I don't care what you think, Shawn!
Cena: Uh, Dick? Excuse me, Vince...will milk be made available to us?
Shawn: We're extremely thirsty sir...
Trish: I have a very low tolerance for dehydration.
Shawn: I've seen her dehydrate sir, it's pretty gross.
Cena stands.
Cena: Relax, I'll get it!
Vince: Ah, ah, ah grab some wood there, bub!
Cena grins.
Vince: What do you think, I was born yesterday? You think I'm gonna have you roaming these halls?

Hunter: Does he really want an answer to that?

He points at Shawn.
Vince: You!
He points at Lita.
Vince: And you! Hey! What's her name? Wake her! Wake her up! (to Lita) Come on, on your feet missy! Let's go! This is no rest home!
Lita gets up.
Vince: There's a soft drink machine in the teacher's lounge. Lets go!
HALLWAY
Shawn and Lita are walking in the hall.
Shawn: So, what's your poison?
Lita doesn't answer.

Orton: Its rude to ignore someone that is talking to you.
Everyone ignores him.

Shawn: What do you drink?
Lita still doesn't answer.
Shawn: Okay...forget I asked...
Lita waits for two beats and then speaks.
Lita: Vodka...
Shawn: Vodka? When do you drink vodka?
Lita: Whenever...
Shawn: A lot?
Lita smiles.
Lita: Tons...
Shawn: Is that why you're here today?
Lita doesn't answer.
Shawn: Why are you here?
Lita snaps back.
Lita: Why are you here?
They stop walking and Shawn leans against the wall.
Shawn: Um, I'm here today...because uh, because my coach and my father don't want me to blow my ride. See I get treated differently because uh, Coach thinks I'm a winner. So does my old man. I'm not a winner because I wanna be one... I'm a winner because I got strength and speed. Kinda like a race horse. That's about how involved I am in what's happening to me.
Lita: Yeah? That's very interesting. Now why don't you tell me why you're really in here.
Shawn: Forget it!
LIBRARY
Trish and Cena and Kenny are all sitting around waiting for the Cokes.
Cena: Trish...you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantitus of the nuts? It's pretty tasty...
Trish: No thank you...
Cena: How do you think he rides a bike?
Trish rolls her eyes and turns away in disgust.
Cena: Oh, Trish...would you ever consider dating a guy like this?
Trish: Can't you just leave me alone?
Cena: I mean if he had a great personality and was a good dancer and had a cool car...Although you'd probably have to ride in the back seat 'cause his nuts would ride shotgun.
Trish: You know what I wish I was doing?
Cena: Op, watch what you say, Kenny here is a cherry.
Kenny: A cherry?
Trish: I wish I was on a plane to France.
Kenny: I'm not a cherry.
Cena: (to Kenny) When have you ever gotten laid?
Kenny: I've laid, lotsa times!
Cena: Name one!
Kenny: She lives in Canada, met her at Niagra Falls. You wouldn't know her.
Cena: Ever laid anyone around here.
Kenny shushes Cena and points at Trish whos back is still turned.
Cena: Oh, you and Trish, did it!
Trish spins around.
Trish: What are you talking about?
Kenny: (to Trish) Nothin', nothin! (to Cena) Let's just drop it, we'll talk about it later!
Trish: No! Drop what, what're you talking about?
Cena: Well, Kenny's trying to tell me that in addition to the number of girls in the Niagra Falls area, that presently you and he are, riding the hobby horse!
Trish: (to Kenny) Little pig!
Kenny: No I'm not! I'm not! John said I was a cherry and I said I wasn't, that's it, that's all that was said!
Cena: Well then what were you motioning to Trish for?
Trish: You know I don't appreciate this very much, Kenny.
Kenny: He is lying!
Cena: Oh you weren't motioning to Trish?
Kenny: You know he's lying, right?
Cena: Were you or were you not motioning to Trish?
Kenny: Yeah, but it was only...was only because I didn't want her to know that I was a virgin, okay?
Cena just stares at him.
Kenny: Excuse me for being a virgin, I'm sorry...
Trish laughs.
Trish: Why didn't you want me to know you were a virgin?
Kenny: Because it's personal business, it's my personal, private business.
Cena: Well Kenny, it doesn't sound like you're doing any business...
Trish: I think it's okay for a guy to be a virgin...
Cena looks suprised.
Kenny: You do?
Trish smiles and nods.

Firefly: And Thats a wrap.
Hunter: You have been dieing to say that haven't you?
Firefly: Yes. Bye everyone.
They all leave.

R/R people.