XXXHolic Fan Fiction ❯ What's Most Important ❯ What's Most Important ( Chapter 1 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: kashuneko 
I kept all the chapters together, so you can just read straight through. If you prefer it broken up, let me know and I'll reload it to MM.
Anime/Manga: XXXHolic Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Hentai / Romance / Angst / Shounen | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 04.23.2009 | Pages: 22 | Words: 20.0K | Visits: 1.0K | Status: Completed
I kept all the chapters together, so you can just read straight through. If you prefer it broken up, let me know and I'll reload it to MM.
Anime/Manga: XXXHolic Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Hentai / Romance / Angst / Shounen | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 04.23.2009 | Pages: 22 | Words: 20.0K | Visits: 1.0K | Status: Completed
XXXholic is owned by CLAMP in Japan and licensed through TokyoPop here in the U.S. I make no profit off this story. I have borrowed the characters just to stop the ramblings in my head.
And in this story, it should be assumed that both Doumeki and Watanuki are 18 or older. Those under 18 would never engage in sexual activities, and if they did, I wouldn't write about it. It's against the law.
What's Most Important
“Thank you for meeting me, Doumeki.”
Himawari was not her normal, cheerful, effervescent self as she greeted her classmate at the park entrance. “I just had some things I wanted to talk to you about.”
They walked side by side into the park, passing laughing children, parents watching them bemusedly.
“This is about him, isn't it?”
She smiled wanly. “Yes.”
Silence fell between them for several moments before Himawari spoke again. “I wanted to let you know, Doumeki, that I'm on your side.”
The stoic archer processed that. She wasn't saying what she really wanted to say. He could tell. “You're in love with him.” He'd just say it for her.
Her smile was sweet and only a touch bitter. “Yes. I am. But there's nothing to be done about it. I want him to be alive and happy. That comes first.”
Doumeki nodded.
“I tried very hard not to fall for him. I actually tried to fall for you. You're the only person I've ever met who I could love safely. But…”
“You can't control who your heart picks, Kunogi. It's very hard not to fall in love with him.”
Himawari turned to face him, nodding. Tears had started to form in her eyes. “Doumeki, I'm glad he's got you.”
The archer's face displayed a touch of self-depredation and bitterness before he schooled it back to indifference and shrugged. Yeah. They were “such good friends,” after all.
“It's hard not to love him, but it's sometimes just so hard being in love with him, isn't it?” She placed a hand on his shoulder and he looked up at her, startled that she'd seen what he'd been trying to keep hidden. Trying, but also trying to make it known, he had to admit, and Kunogi was a smart girl.
“Yeah,” he admitted.
Another moment of silence shared and then she looked away, looked at the ducks swimming in the pond. “I'm going to leave, Doumeki.”
He nodded. She'd said what she wanted to say, there was no point in staying in the park.
“I'm leaving to go to Hokkaido. There's a monastery up there that studies curses.”
Oh. She was trying to break her curse. Did that mean if she succeeded… she'd come back for him. He looked at her intensely and she smiled softly at the wariness in his eyes.
“I'm not your rival, Doumeki. Even if they figure it out, I'm not coming back. I'm taking Tanpopo and leaving for good. It's enough that he cared. It's enough. I want him to be happy. And that means,” she tried and failed to stifle a sob. “He needs you. So you take care of him, okay?” And then, realizing that saying it had made her plans real, no going back, it hit her. She was leaving the man she loved - the man they both loved. She looked down at the ground and tried to hold back her tears.
The handsome teenager reached out with one hand toward her chin, lifted it so that she'd meet his eyes. “You are a good friend, Kunogi.”
That was more than she could take. She threw her arms around him and began to sob. Doumeki put his arms around her in an embrace, letting her cry on his shoulder. He was the only one who could do that for her, and she was a good friend. His hands stroked up and down her back in a soothing manner. Taking the comfort that was so foreign to her existence, she hugged him harder in return. “You two are the best friends anyone could ever hope for,” she hiccupped through her tears.
Putting his hands on her shoulders, he pushed her away just enough so he could look her in the eye. He bent a bit as he did so. “When you find a cure, come back and fight me for him fair and square, okay?”
She could read in his eyes how much he loved the seer. And that he thought Watanuki would prefer her, which was actually kind of funny. Doumeki was such a good guy. “I really wish I could have fallen for you,” she whispered, reaching one hand up so that her fingertips stroked his cheek.
He smiled at her. “I'll walk you to the train.”
With that, they began their trek to exit the park.
X
It was a beautiful spring day, and Watanuki was restless as he cleaned the shop. In fact, he was so fidgety that he'd already broken three dishes. Even with his spaz-motor in high gear, he usually didn't break anything.
Yuuko walked into the store room and said, “Spring Fever, eh? Well, then. You are to take the rest of the day off and relax, Watanuki. I don't want you breaking anything in here, and apparently you need a break.” She tapped a finger on her chin in mock thought. “ Oh, I know! Why don't you go for a walk in the park. There are ducks by the lake you could feed.” Her piece being said, she shooed him out of the shop, not listening to any arguments. That was the way it was. Yuuko spoke, there was no room for discussion.
Still, he couldn't be too upset. It was a lovely day. The cherry trees that lined the path were scattering their petals lightly.
And then, looking up, he saw something that made him smile. “Hey, it's Himawari-chan.” Just as he was about to call to her, he noticed, “and isn't that Doumeki?” What could they be doing? Was Doumeki really dating Himawari-chan behind his back? He claimed it all the time - yelled quite loudly about it, in fact - but he never thought it was really true.
They were standing next to each other, both of their postures tense. What were they talking about?
Doumeki reached to touch her face. Why is he touching her?! And then, they were hugging. Doumeki and Himawari hugging. What exactly had he stumbled upon here? Doumeki's hands were rubbing her back, and his eyes were closed. Why were his eyes closed? Watanuki snuck a bit closer to spy on them, hiding behind a cherry tree, so that they wouldn't see him.
And then, his best friend put his hands on the girl's shoulders and pushed her away. Yes. That's right. Push her-
But then he bent down, and all that Watanuki could see was the back of Himawari's head, blocking Doumeki's face. A swirl of cherry blossoms decorated the tableau. Were they… Were they kissing? A hand flew up to cover his mouth.
As they pulled apart, she reached up and stroked his face lovingly and the archer smiled at her as a blossom landed in his hair. Stoic Doumeki Shizuka SMILED at her. SMILED!
The hand that had covered his mouth fell away, and he sagged against the tree. He felt like he had been punched in the sternum. Doumeki and Himawari. Without really paying attention, he stumbled away.
Doumeki and Himawari.
How long had this been going on?
How long?
Were they in love? The thought hurt. It hurt his head, his heart. Doumeki and Himawari. His Himawari. Was kissing HIS Doumeki!
Somehow, he managed to stumble back to the shop, where Yuuko was waiting for him. Yuuko who had suggested the park in the first place.
Softly, he said, his voice devoid of any emotion, “You knew. You knew what I would see there.”
Her expression was sad but kind as she replied, “The question you need to ask yourself is what was so upsetting?” Before he could interrupt with a tirade, she continued, “You need to really think about it, Watanuki, and be truthful to yourself. What part of what you witnessed today made your heart hurt, why, and what you want to do about it. You have the rest of the day off. You can spend it in your room here, if you'd like. I'll make sure you're not disturbed.”
With a defeated nod, he trudged to the room Yuuko kept for him at the shop and fell back onto his futon.
As he lay there, his brain kept replaying the scene over and over again. He could recall every detail. Doumeki cupping Himawari's chin, her face surprised as she looked up at him. Himawari throwing herself at the archer and Doumeki willingly embracing her, his hands splayed over her back, his eyes closed. Doumeki leaning down, hands on her shoulders when they kissed. And when they separated, Doumeki's smile, not a smirk, but a genuine smile, with a cherry blossom perched incongruously in his hair in response to the way she stroked his face, her fingers brushing from his cheek, to his chin.
Again. He lifts her chin, she hugs him, they kiss, she strokes his face, he smiles. Chin, hug, kiss, touch, smile.
Put in those simple terms, it didn't seem like all that much to get upset about. Chin, hug, kiss, touch, smile.
But… The bastard was smiling! Since when did Doumeki smile? He never showed any emotions. Ever. There was serious effort on Watanuki's part on a regular basis to get him to show something - after all, didn't he cook the archer's favorite foods every single day? The jerk always requested out of season or hard to prepare foods and Watanuki always came through. But had that ungrateful ass ever smiled for HIM? Oh, hell no.
And then, there he was, kissing Himawari!
But then again, he didn't' really see them kiss. It could have been something else - a peck on the cheek, maybe. Right?
That didn't matter though, because it was still WRONG! Doumeki was out sneaking around to see Himawari!
But that wasn't really fair. Doumeki hadn't mentioned seeing her, but who said he had to tell Watanuki his every plan? And with Himawari's curse, Doumeki was really the only person she could even try to date. Didn't she deserve to have a happy life? And Doumeki was the only one who could safely…
He would make her feel safe and happy. His arms would be around her, would brush hair out of her face as he watched her sleeping.
Watanuki didn't have a chance. If Himawari and Doumeki could be happy together…
Doumeki would make her smile. And she'd make Doumeki…
God, his heart HURT! It just wasn't fair! Where did Watanuki fit into this? Nowhere.
Watanuki was the one who put his life on the line every day, who spent countless hours feeding that bottomless pit. And never once had he gotten a smile from the jerk. He had thought Doumeki was simply a stoic bastard. But now…
Now he knew. Doumeki was just stoic around HIM.
Well, who cared? Who cared if the bastard didn't care about him at all! It wasn't like he WANTED the giant moron to be his friend anyway.
Yeah. It didn't change anything. Doumeki was merely his bodyguard. An overgrown, annoying lug of a bodyguard who hung around all the time just to cause him more grief. Now that Doumeki had Himawari, there was no need for him to hang around all the time. That should be a relief. He'd finally be rid of the cretin. The big oaf.
Rolling over, he hugged the pillow, not realizing his tears were soaking it, until he fell asleep.
X
The familiar wood of the porch captured his attention thoroughly. His fingers traced its grain, back, forth, again. Years of sandals had worn the wood smooth, not likely to get any splinters. And the wood was strong, fascinating, really.
It wasn't that he didn't want to look up and face the man smoking next to him, who looked too much like…
“Watanuki, you are troubled.”
The dreaming seer kept his head down. “Did you know that your grandson is in love?”
Smiling, the ghost replied, “Did he finally tell you?”
Finally tell me? His heart felt as if it had been cut anew. He looked up at the man, hurt and desperation painted all over his face. “No. I… found out.”
Haruka looked at the boy curiously then turned and took a long drag from his cigarette. “It's strange. While I expected you to be surprised, I did not anticipate you'd be so upset. Is there not a part of you that is …happy about this?”
“I…” Watanuki swallowed. Then, he nodded. “I suppose you're right, Haruka. I am happy for them,” he closed his eyes tightly and then forced them open again, “so I'll have to focus on that, won't I?”
Confused, Haruka stared at the boy whom he'd come to think of as his own kin. “Shizuka would do anything for you, you know.” What on earth was this child talking about?
His eyes opening wide, Watanuki heard the implication. Yes. From everything he'd seen, Doumeki Shizuka - he swallowed as he thought it - would do anything for him. It was something he saw as his duty, after all. So, for them to be happy, he'd have to… step aside. “Yes. I understand,” he said. His voice was even more devoid of emotion than ever before.
X
School went as usual. Doumeki was waiting for him as he walked by.
It wasn't the first time he'd tried to avoid the archer on his way to school. He had walked on the other side of the road - and why did the temple have to be between both Yuuko's and his apartment and the school. It was like he couldn't get away if he tried - which he did often.
“Oi!”
He ignored the voice, power-walking as fast as he could, bento box bumping into his leg with each stride.
“Oi! Idiot! Wait up.” Doumeki crossed the street and quickly closed the gap between them. Without a word, he grabbed for the bento box, pulled it away.
“You complete glutton! Give that back! It's for lunch, not a personal snack pack.”
Shrugging, the archer replied, “I'll carry it. You were going to injure yourself the way you were walking with it.”
Comfortably falling back into old patterns, Watanuki began ranting. “I am perfectly capable of carrying a bento box, you walking stomach! And if I catch even the slightest sign that you're peeking inside, all lunches for you will immediately cease. I'm serious, too. I know you think your lunch privileges are irrevocable, but that is only because I, the great Watanuki-sama, am benevolent. It's apparent you have a tapeworm that if not constantly fed would cause you to wither and die, so someone has to feed you on a regular basis. Although, you might be better off going to a doctor - because eventually, that parasite is going to take over and then what are you going to do? Hm? What's that, no answer? Of course not, because you know I'm right - which only makes sense because I'm so much smarter than you - in every way.”
Lifting the box, he raised it up, resting it on the seer's head as they walked, smirking to himself as Watanuki reacted like an angry cat, all hissing and flailing limbs. This was how he liked his Kimihiro - all bristly and energetic.
When they arrived at school, he set the box in Watanuki's locker then left for class.
X
Lunch started the same as usual. Watanuki and Doumeki met in the hallway and made their way out to their favorite spot for lunch. As Watanuki set out the items, Doumeki carefully snuck bites in his usual game to see how many he could get before the cook caught him at it. Oddly, he noticed that the flavor of the food was a bit off. It tasted like… strange, but it left an aftertaste that was confusing - or confused.
And then, Himawari arrived.
She was her usually smiling, cheerful self. And Watanuki tried - he really did - to react as he normally did. But, his mind kept replaying, chin, hug, kiss, touch, smile, and he found it difficult to look at Doumeki after that. Because if Doumeki smiled, he didn't know what he'd do. Instead, he focused his attention on the food and Himawari, but his reactions were reserved compared to his normal behavior.
X
After school, Doumeki walked him to Yuuko's. Watanuki didn't say much on the way - just one or two complaints about having to have knuckle-headed oafs around all the time. When they arrived, the seer told him he'd be staying at Yuuko's that night, so there'd be no need for Doumeki to come back. There wouldn't be any need. He should, you know, feel free to go do anything or see anyone he wanted.
As he disappeared through the gate, Doumeki stared after him, wondering what the heck was bugging Watanuki, because he certainly wasn't acting normal.
X
The next three days passed in a very similar fashion. The only difference was that each day, Watanuki became quieter and quieter at lunch, so Himawari and Doumeki tried to make up for it. Their conversations ranged from the weather, to student council, to archery, to Watanuki's cooking - but the more they talked, the more it seemed the seer had nothing to say.
And the food. Himawari didn't seem to notice, but Doumeki felt like something was going on. It was as if the flavor was less open, more… closed off.
Finally, on Friday, Himawari decided it was time. During lunch, in a lull in the conversation - there were more of those each day - she said, “Um, Watanuki, Doumeki. I have something I need to tell you both.”
When they both looked up at her, she said, “I'm… I'm moving.”
“Moving?” Watanuki inquired.
She nodded, not quite meeting his eyes. “To Hokkaido. I've… my parents decided it was the best place for us right now. We'll be leaving at the end of the month.”
Eyes wide, his mouth hanging open, Watanuki couldn't think what to say. Then, he whirled on Doumeki and slapped his shoulder. “Aren't you going to say anything to her?”
“Aren't you?” he shrugged at the girl.
“Oh, my god. I can't believe you. Do something!”
“What should I do? If Kunogi's family is leaving, there's not much anyone can do.”
“But Himawari-” He turned to the girl. “Himawari, what will we do? You… you can't leave now! It's not fair. If you leave now then Doumeki…” he stopped himself and changed tactics. “Don't you know how important you are? How much… You just… you…” he ended on a whisper. “You can't leave.”
With a sad smile, she bowed to him. “I'm really sorry, Watanuki. But this is something I have to do. But, you shouldn't worry. I've got Tanpopo with me, so you'll never be far from my… thoughts. You're such a good friend. I'll never forget what you've done for me - both of you. I…” One hand came up to her heart and she quickly stood. “I think I have something in my eye. I…”
She turned and ran back to the school.
They watched her leave. Once she was out of sight, Watanuki turned on the archer. “What did you do! What did you do to Himawari?”
Brows crunched as if he were confused, he replied, “What are you talking about?”
“You must have done something. Did you push too hard? Did you say something?”
“You're an idiot. Why would anything I did affect her family's decision to move?”
“Because!” he threw his hands up in the air. “AARGH! You're such a Doumeki! I can't believe she… Whatever. Just. Just.” He turned and bit his lower lip. “Don't just sit there. Go after her. You need to spend as much time as you can with her while you can. If you don't, you'll… you'll regret it.”
Doumeki stared at the boy as if he'd lost his mind.
“Go on. GO!!!”
With a shrug, because it seemed like there was no other choice, he walked after Kunogi.
X
After school, Doumeki tried to walk him to Yuuko's but Watanuki was having no part of it. “Are you an idiot? Walk with Kunogi!”
“Kunogi doesn't get attacked on a regular basis.”
“I'll be fine. You… Just go.”
When Doumeki, who by now was starting to get a little irritated by his seer's strange behavior, silently turned and left.
Once he was gone, Watanuki slumped over and trudged toward work. The knowledge that he was doing the right thing for those he cared about did little to lift his mood.
X
Doumeki was late to school the next day. He'd been waiting for Watanuki to come past the temple, and he had never arrived. Where was the idiot? By the time he took off running to school, he was 5 minutes late.
Lunch couldn't come fast enough.
The teen always looked forward to eating Watanuki's cooking, but today, he was more concerned with just making sure the idiot was all right. But when he sought out the teen, Watanuki had simply thrust the bento at him, saying, “You and Himawari should just have a nice lunch together. Okay?” And then he practically ran down the hall, disappearing in the crowd.
Doumeki found Himawari and asked her what was going on? But the pretty girl had no clue. In fact, she thought he'd seemed perfectly fine when they were in class. He'd smiled at her, like usual, told her how wonderful and pretty she was, and talked about how they would have to throw a going away party for her - Yuuko would host it at the shop, Watanuki would do the cooking - all that was left to figure out was who would provide the alcohol. He'd seemed cheerful the whole time, even when talking about how much he'd miss her and asking if there was a chance her parents might reconsider.
Hm-ing, Doumeki began inhaling his lunch. As usual, Watanuki was a culinary genius. In fact, this particular lunch might have been the best he'd ever tasted - except he tasted a sense of loss in it. If he was going to miss her so much, why wasn't he spending time with her?
Finishing up the last bite quickly, he told Himawari he'd see her later, and went back inside the school to confront Watanuki.
It was stupid. He was missing his chance to spend time with her before she left. And, he had to admit, it was making him angry how excited he was about the prospect of having her gone. It was wrong, selfish. Watanuki and Himawari were in love with each other. If she could break the curse so that she wouldn't cause him any mishap - the boy had enough troubles already! - then, Doumeki would support the two of them. Any hopes that day might never come were unworthy of thinking. What would happen would happen.
He continued stalking the halls in search of his prey. Why was he avoiding the girl, when it was so obvious how he felt about her? When he found the skinny idiot, he'd… He growled without realizing it.
After checking practically every room in the school, he eventually made his way to the roof. There, he found Watanuki, sitting in a shaded corner, poking at his own food, disheartedly. Something about the expression on his face reminded the archer of the first time he really ever noticed Watanuki - standing in the rain, holding a dead animal's body.
“Oi!” Doumeki called, half angry at the chase the moron had put him through, half relieved to have found him unscathed.
Without looking up, the boy waved one hand dismissively, “What are you doing here, Doumeki?”
“Looking for you.”
Shrugging, Watanuki responded, “You should go back to Himawari.”
“That's what I was about to say to you.”
“Oh, and you don't need to walk me to the shop after school. I'll be just fine. In fact, I've got a lot of errands to run - a goodbye party to plan - I don't need you, around, getting in my way, okay?”
Doumeki just stared at him. “Listen, idiot. Kunogi is only here for another week and a half. Why are you up here?”
Finally looking up at him, Watanuki felt on the edge of tears. To cover it, he started yelling. “I don't need you to tell me that. I'm perfectly aware of how long… Listen, just leave me alone. Go back to Himawari and leave me alone. I've got things to do, and you,, you're just a big pain in my ass. So just leave me alone! I won't bother the two of you anymore, so... Just.” He stood. “Just leave me alone.”
He ran. Down the stairs and out of the school. He passed Himawari who called, “Hey, did Doumeki find you, he was really worried…” But the seer just waved her off and continued running. He ran and ran and ran until he was at the temple.
Standing outside the gates, he panted, leaning on his knees as he tried to catch his breath. Once he had recovered, Watanuki entered and crossed the yard. He needed time alone. Time to think. He collapsed to a sitting position under the cherry tree.
Himawari was leaving Doumeki. It wasn't fair.
Doumeki had… smiled for her. He loved her. And here she was, breaking his heart and leaving him.
And that stupid, emotionless Doumeki wasn't even trying to get her to stay! Why had she fallen for a guy like him? Stupid, stoic Doumeki Shizuka, with his strong shoulders and his tall looming physique, and golden eyes that… The guy was perfect. All the girls at school had a crush on him. Every Valentine's Day, his locker would always be crammed with chocolates. But whenever Watanuki commented on how popular he was, he'd shrug and say, “Popular? Hm. I think you're more popular than I am.” Yeah, right.
Watanuki couldn't stand it. Was Doumeki so hurt by Himawari leaving that he was trying to just avoid the whole situation? For the first time that he could remember, Watanuki felt anger toward the pretty, curly-haired girl. How could she do this to him? How could she leave the one man who could survive her curse.
And then, a thought hit him. It was as if Haruka's voice was whispering it right in his ear, as he remembered what the ghost had said in his dream, “Shizuka would do anything for you, you know.”
Had… Had Shizuka turned her down - because of him?
This… It would be just something that moron would try. Wasn't he always coming and trying to save him, even when Watanuki specifically told him not to? Even when it got him hurt? The guy gave up half his eye for him. This… this was too much. For him to give up the woman he loved…
It was… it was wrong.
Doumeki.
The image of Doumeki smiling at Himawari in the park haunted him. That was how he should look.
The thought came to Watanuki - he was in the way. He was really in the way. As long as he was around, Doumeki would… He'd do anything for him.
And so, there wasn't anything else to be done, was there? If he was out of the picture, Doumeki could confess to Himawari, and then, she could stay.
Standing, he laid one hand on the tree's bark and whispered, “Goodbye, Doumeki.” Turning, he walked slowly back to his own apartment. It was time to do something worthwhile. For once.
X
After school, Himawari rushed to find Doumeki. What had happened? What happened to make Watanuki run away, skip the second half of school?
“I don't know. But I'm going to find out,” he replied and turned to leave the school grounds. It was time to talk to the witch.
He entered the shop, his voice a thrumming of thunder to come as he asked the witch, “Where is he?”
Blinking, she replied disingenuously, “He didn't show up today. Actually, I suspect he won't. He's… he's made a decision.”
“If you have something to say, say it quickly, so I can go find him.”
“Oh, ho ho! A man whose girlfriend is about to leave town for good shouldn't be chasing off after someone else.”
Angry now, his hands curled into fists as he stated slowly, “What. Are you talking about?”
“Why, Himawari, of course! Watanuki saw you two in the park the other day.” She snapped her fingers and the image of what Watanuki had seen appeared before him.
That looked like… That looked like… It looked like two lovers in an embrace, kissing. All of a sudden, it made sense, Watanuki's pushing the two of them together, trying to get him to leave him alone - really, he was… God, it was so Watanuki to put other people's happiness before his own.
“That idiot,” he breathed.
“So you and Himawari-chan are not a couple?”
“No. Kunogi-san and I are just friends who… share an interest.”
“Ah. Well. That interest is currently contemplating doing something rather stupid. He's realized what's most important to him, but,” she shook her head with a fond smile, “he still hasn't admitted why.
“What about you, Doumeki? Do you know what's most important to you?”
He nodded grimly before responding, “Yes. I do.”
She leaned in toward him and placed one finger under his chin. “Good. You'll need to be ready, Doumeki.” She fixed him with her red eyes, that were suddenly grave. “It's up to you to keep him from disappearing. This time, he means to disappear forever. You are the only one, Doumeki, the only one who can help him now.” He'd never seen her look so serious.
Pulling back, she resumed her normal frivolous demeanor. “Well? What are you waiting for? Go!”
He nodded again. As he reached the door she said, “Bring me a bottle of sake from your grandfather's stores as payment. I'll let you choose which one, based on how you feel after tonight.”
Sighing in disgust, he left. He'd grab his bow from the temple, and then he'd go to Watanuki's place. He was about to do something “rather stupid,” was he? Not if Doumeki had anything to say about it. And if he wouldn't let him in, he'd simply kick the door down.
X
When Doumeki left the temple, his bow in hand, the sun was already starting to set. A sense of dread had gripped him, and it was just getting stronger. He had to be there before the sun set. With a speed he didn't know he possessed, Doumeki took off running.
X
As soon as he got back to his apartment, Watanuki got busy.
It wasn't right. He… he didn't even belong here. He couldn't remember any details of his life. It was only a matter of time before he disappeared anyway. Why had that stupid moron ever bothered helping him?
Well, he wouldn't be a barrier to Doumeki's happiness anymore.
Razor scraper in one hand, acetone in the other, he started removing the seals of purification from his apartment. The one in the kitchen went first. Then the living room. The bedroom. The bathroom. Then finally, the front door. As he went, his mind reviewed all the times he'd relied on the archer.
As he hung off the roof of the girls' school on Himawari's errand, Doumeki's sure grip preventing his fall - even as he was cut, injured. Doumeki freeing him from the spiderweb. Doumeki stopping Kohane's mom from attaking Watanuki any further. Doumeki standing in the rain for hours on end, holding that ribbon so he could find his way back to the world of the living. Doumeki was always there, supporting him - he could count on the big idiot, HAD counted on him. He was the one point of surety in his life. And what had he supplied in return? Lunch? And yelled about how the quiet man hadn't thanked him.
God, he was so worthless. Doumeki was simply… selfless. But now, now he'd get something back.
Even if Doumeki was mad at him at first. He'd be able to finally live the life he was meant to live - the one Watanuki had interrupted with his insanity.
“Good,” Watanuki breathed. He closed his eyes, accepting the inevitable. Hitsuzen, he thought. Then he determinedly walked to the living room to wait. With the number of spirits that dogged him at his apartment, it shouldn't take long.
The clock read 6:17. He could see the last rays of sunlight, flickering against the wall in tones of pink and violet and orange. They started to fade and he watched them dispassionately. Hitsuzen. Had he been heading toward this all along? Right now, it certainly felt that way.
Everything had to end sometime.
X
The sun's last rays had just disappeared as he began to cough and choke. Tendrils of oily black smoke crawled in through the living room window. He leaned back on the couch and continued to wait. It wasn't hard. All he had to do was remember - remember the image of Doumeki Shizuka smiling. Soon, he would be able to smile unhindered.
Suddenly, white light exploded around him, causing the oily smoke to dissipate almost instantly. He looked up and witnessed the archer, panting, as he pulled himself through the living room window.
“Just what the hell do you think you're doing you moron?!” He yelled at Watanuki.
Biting his lower lip, he wanted to cry. What was Doumeki doing here? Why couldn't he just leave him alone? Leave him to… “It's none of your business, you big oaf! It's my apartment!” he cried. “Who asked you to come here?”
Through gritted teeth, the taller teen replied, “Yuuko did, you dumbass! What the hell did you do?” Doumeki pointed to the spot where, until recently, there had been a protective seal.
Pouting, he said, “What do you care? If I'm around, I'll only be a distraction. I… I want you and Himawari-chan to be happy…”
Dropping the bow, Doumeki came over to him and grabbed him by the shoulders, shaking him as he exclaimed, “You are a complete and total idiot! Don't you realize Kunogi is in love with you?!”
Blinking, the seer looked at the archer as if he couldn't understand the words he was saying. “Himawari… loves…”
The archer all of a sudden couldn't look at him. “Yeah. She loves you. That's what she came to tell me in the park. That's what you saw.”
“How did you know I saw… Oh. Yuuko.”
“She's going away to a monastery that studies curses to figure out how to break it. When they figure it out, she'll be able to come back and…” he swallowed and then put his mask of stoicism firmly back in place. “You'll get to be with her, just like you always wanted.”
“She…”
“I can't believe you're this much of an idiot that you would do this. God, you moron.” Realizing he was still holding the seers shoulders, he let them go and turned away fully.
Had he done the right thing? Kunogi was dangerous. But… this was more immediate. He'd figure out a way to keep Watanuki safe. It was all that was important. He'd always known that his feelings were unrequited. It didn't matter. All that mattered was that Watanuki was alright, alive.
The effects of the evening's events hit him then. It had been close. Too close. He'd almost lost him. Uncontrollably, he started to shake. He had to get himself under control.
Sitting down on the couch, a safe enough distance from Watanuki that he couldn't think anything about it, he put his elbows on his knees, buried his face in his hands, then ran them through his hair. “I'll have to make you some new sutra,” he muttered.
“Why?”
Doumeki turned to gape at the man like he'd lost his mind. Shouldn't it be obvious? So you'll be safe and spirits won't try to eat you.
“No. Why do you always come to save me?”
Doumeki went over to the desk where Watanuki kept his school supplies and pulled out some paper and some pens. It wasn't the high quality parchment that a permanent sutra would need, but it would work in a pinch. It was the intent that counted. He sat down and began writing.
“You cretin! I asked you a question. It's only polite to answer someone when they ask you a question, you know, and if you hadn't noticed, that's MY paper and pens you're using without asking.”
After finishing his holy writing on the paper available, he stalked over to the living room window, slapped the paper against the wall as he concentrated on praying. The writing began to glow and it stuck to the frame as if it had been glued. He placed one on either side of the window, then went to do likewise to the front door.
“I didn't ask you to go putting those up, you know. Hey! I'm talking to you here! Stop that. STOP THAT!”
“No.” Front door done, he stalked to the kitchen.
“That's my kitchen! You're not allowed in there, you… you… you… Doumeki!” But by the time he'd finished his sentence, the warrior had already moved on and was in the bathroom.
Watanuki tried to block him in there as he ranted, “You complete and utter ass! It's not my fault if Himawari dumped you. I can't believe you're taking it out on me, bugging me and trying to make my life miserable. You know, you could have just left me alone. That would have made things easier. I wouldn't be around and you could follow her to Hokkaido - then you'd have her all to yourself and the two of you-”
Pushing past him as easily as a breeze passes through a screen, Doumeki said,“I don't love Kunogi, you idiot.” He continued into the bedroom and Watanuki followed.
It didn't make sense. Himawari was in love with Watanuki and Doumeki was NOT in love with Himawari. But then why did he kiss her? Except, maybe he hadn't. If he'd just bent his head down to talk to her, that could have explained it. But the hug! Well, that could have a been a hug goodbye. Right? But then…
But Haruka had said that… no. he'd just been surprised that Doumeki had said something to HIM about being in love. So he had to be in love with someone - just not Himawari.
Who? Who was trying to steal Doumeki away…
Oh, god.
Yuuko had said he needed to figure out what was upsetting him. And now he knew. It wasn't seeing Himawari with Doumeki. It was seeing Doumeki with… Smiling… And not at him. That was what hurt.
His most important task was making it so Doumeki could smile. Not Himawari. It was Doumeki.
His heart pounding, Watanuki leaned against the wall, sank to the floor, laid his forehead down to his knees and covered them with his arms.
He was… in… in love with… Oh, god. He was in love with Doumeki.
And Himawari loved him.
And Doumeki was in love with someone else.
What a horrible, horrible mess!
Sutras securely in place, the archer crossed over to the young man sitting in a ball on the floor. “You'll be safe now,” he said - as usual with no trace of emotion.
“Thanks alot,” he muttered bitterly from between the arms wrapped around his head. Safe from spirits, maybe, but not from the pain that was wringing his heart.
That did it. What the fuck was his problem? Doumeki grasped his shoulder and jerked him upright. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”
The boy looked up and his eyes met the golden orbs of his savior, which were burning in anger and confusion. Swallowing, he tried to keep the flush from rising to his cheeks. He was so close. And now that he knew… He had to keep the longing from his eyes. Had to… push the man away - to where he could be happy. Had to…“You are. You keep butting your way into my life! Why do you keep interfering?”
Doumeki's voice dropped to a dangerous hiss. “You idiot. You think Kunogi wants you dead?”
It was too much. The man would never care for him, would he? No. He came over because Yuuko asked him to, or because he was worried about Himawari. It was clear the man would never actually care for him, do something for him because he just wanted to. The hurt was too much and he lashed out. “Oh. Kunogi.” He laughed in disbelief. “Of course. What else? You know what? Fuck you!” He was really screaming now. “You're this great guy -Perfect Doumeki. Everyone loves Doumeki! You're so god-damned perfect! Well, I didn't ask you to hang around all the time, making my life miserable. You barge right in like a knight on a white horse - which you aren't, by the way! You know, if I did die, you wouldn't even care except how it stained your honor-”
Before he could think what he was doing, Doumeki slapped the seer across the face. A red handprint started to imprint itself there already, as he hissed. “Shut up. You have no idea what you're talking about.”
Watanuki just stared at the boy crouching across from him, his mouth opened. Had he really been wanting to see emotion on Doumeki's face? Because he had it now. In spades.
Worrying his lower lip, Doumeki averted his face so he didn't have to see what he'd done in his anger. Shame painted his face as he whispered. “You don't have any idea what you're talking about.”
God. That hurt. He raised one hand to touch his cheek. But as much as it stung, the look on Doumeki's face made him feel worse. Turning his head away from the archer, he rested one temple on his knee. “I'm sorry.” In a voice so low, he didn't think it would be heard, he whispered, “I can understand why you hate me.”
“I don't hate you.”
Bitterly, Watanuki agreed, “No. No, I guess you wouldn't even hate me.” He sighed, never lifting his head from his knees. “I guess I should thank you for saving me. I'm safe now, though. You don't have to stay or anything.”
Lips tight, and still not looking at him, Doumeki replied,“If you think I'm leaving you on your own after the stunt you pulled, you're dumber than you look.”
With a shrug, Watanuki simply slid over to his futon, climbed under the covers, keeping his face averted the whole time until the covers were over his head.
Doumeki watched him. After a minute, he said, “Oi. What are you doing?”
“I'm… I'm going to bed,” he said from under the covers.
“You're going to be comfortable like that?”
“Of course. This is how I always sleep.”
Doumeki stared at the lump under the covers and said, “You always sleep with all your clothes on.” Incredulity was heavy in his tone.
Oh. God. Again, he looked like an idiot. He always did around Doumeki. It just wasn't fair.
Keeping his back to the archer, he got out of the bed to get undressed.
Doumeki decided to follow suit.
Turning around, Watanuki saw the teen had taken off his shirt and pushed his pants about two-thirds of the way down his muscular legs.
“What are you doing!?!” he screeched, turning his back on the boy, and hoping to hide his furious blush.
“Getting ready to go to bed,” he answered, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Isn't that what you were doing?”
“Yes. But no! This is MY apartment! Why are you stripping in my bedroom? In my apartment?”
Speaking slowly, as if to a small child, “So I can go to bed.”
Still with his back to him, he said, “Who said you could sleep in here? I never did!” Oh god. He had to stop blushing!
“I'm not leaving you alone,” the archer's voice was threatening now and brooked no argument.
“Oh,” he replied. “Well, don't look at me when I'm changing. I don't want your creepy eyes on me.”
“Mm,” Shizuka grunted, noncommittally.
Continuing to get undressed, and blushing even deeper the whole time, he responded, “Well… okay then. Okay.”
Doumeki stared as the pullover shirt was lifted over his head, revealing inch after inch of porcelain white skin. Dressed, the boy looked scrawny, but years of running and fighting off spirits had actually created lean muscle that he could see under skin that was begged to be touched. He swallowed and looked away just before the boy finished and would turn to see whether he'd actually had his gaze averted.
Watanuki's own eyes ran over the muscular physique of his “rival” and he swallowed and squeaked, “Well!” then cleared his throat and continued, “time for bed!” and slid in under the covers.
Doumeki walked to the other side and crawled in as well, keeping safely close to the far side of the bed.
Each lay in the bed with his eyes open, staring at opposite walls.
The first was berating himself, wondering if he did Watanuki more harm than good in telling him of their classmate's feelings, wondering if Kunogi would understand - somehow he thought she would, wondering why Watanuki hadn't thrown a fucking parade when he'd told him. Nothing of this evening made sense. He could understand feeling down about Kunogi moving, or even feeling alone and vulnerable because he'd thought that she liked Shizuki instead of him. But to try to kill himself. The idiot had actually tried - of all the ways for him to lose his life, this was one that Doumeki Shizuka had not actually considered possible. He'd almost lost him. Well, never again. He'd never let him out of his sight.
The other felt even more miserable than he had before. The heat of the person next to him assaulted his senses. It wasn't fair. All he'd wanted to do was make things better for Doumeki. He was such a useless burden. And Doumeki deserved to be free of him. No one deserved to be tied down to a duty as stark and unrelenting as Watanuki's. Why did he keep coming back and saving him? And what had he said that had upset Doumeki enough that he'd slap him? All that he really wanted in the whole world was to have Doumeki smile at him like he'd done at Himawari at the park. But… that day would never come. Doumeki may not hate him - but that was because he just didn't care enough to feel that strongly about him at all. God. Why did he have to fall in love with the perfect Doumeki? Hitsuzen? Hitsuzen must hate him then.
X
The smell of cigarette smoke made him open his eyes to see Haruka staring at him.
“Hi, Haruka,” he said.
He frowned. “What's wrong, Kimihiro?”
The seer just shook his dream head.
When the seer didn't respond, he continued, “Is it Shizuka?”
Still not looking at the dead exorcist, he couldn't help but think about Shizuka. He behaved as the truest friend Watanuki had ever known and yet, he couldn't be sure if the archer cared about him at all, apart from as a duty. Sure, he drove him up the last wall, but he was strong and smart and if a day went by where he didn't see him, the day just didn't seem right. And his golden eyes were always, always watching out for Watanuki. More than anything, he wanted Doumeki to be happy. He wanted Doumeki to smile. Smile at him. Because of him. Because he…
The dead exorcist smiled at the hazy, moonstruck expression on the boy's face.
“Kimihiro, do you have feelings for my grandson?”
Startled, he looked up at the man. Haruka could see the worry on the boy's face - well, that made sense. Those raised in a temple weren't typically expected to approve of homosexual relationships. Haruka smiled to let him know that either way, he'd be okay with it. As soon as he saw the acceptance there, though, Watanuki's face turned into one of utter despair.
He nodded, as tears began to stream.“Yeah. I…” love him.
The dead man patted his back, trying to calm and sooth him. “Have you told him yet?”
Let the flailing commence. “No! I couldn't! He wouldn't- He doesn't- It wouldn't work- And he's in love anyway and I'm just in the way, and…” He flung his head in his hands. “It doesn't matter, Haruka. I just… I just wish I could do something to make his life better - to make him happy.”
Coughing so that he wouldn't chuckle - that would be rude - Haruka said, “Hearing that someone loves him - that you love him - *I* believe nothing would make him happier.”
X
It was still dark out - about midnight. There was an arm around his middle, holding him tightly.
Apparently, in the middle of the night, Shizuka had rolled over and claimed Watanuki as his teddy bear. He could feel all the angular planes of the body behind him as the pressed against his back, his legs. They were like two spoons, and it was surprising how comfortable it felt. His skin up against his own felt like… it felt…
Warm. It was warm - both in temperature and the way his heart felt.
When had he fallen for this giant oaf? When had Doumeki become so important to him? Had he always railed about the man because of how inferior he'd felt in comparison? Or was it because, even from the start, Doumeki felt like… home.
His heart beat louder in his chest. It was so loud that he wondered why the sound wasn't waking up the fool next to him.
A nose began nuzzling his neck, humming happily between snores. “Hmmm,” a happy sigh from the man behind him. He must be dreaming of holding someone else the way he was doing now with Watanuki. Someone else. That thought made the seer want to escape, run away. But the arm around him wouldn't let him go. And he didn't want to leave. God, there must be something wrong with him because this was Doumeki - Doumeki! - and he wanted this, wanted the arm around him, wanted it to be real, not a dream Doumeki was having.
But he was dreaming of the person who he loved - the person who Haruka knew about, but Watanuki didn't and at least it wasn't Himawari, but then who? Who? And the breath on his neck was not good, it was obviously wrong because he shouldn't be feeling tingles in THAT area and oh, god, another breath and wishing it was more than breath, maybe lips and then maybe-
“Shizuka! Wake up and let go of me!” He began to struggle. All he knew was he couldn't be there with a hard-on for Doumeki to see. If the cretin would ever wake up, he couldn't be there with him. He couldn't when he knew the boy would leave him - he'd leave just like everyone else in his life - and if he saw this and then left, the shame and humiliation would be too much for him to bear.
X
He couldn't exactly remember what the dream was, but he knew it was pleasant. And then, a very loud, “Shizuka! Please!” pulled him from his slumber. Startled, he jerked awake, and as he did, he felt a body next to his slip out of his grasp and run out of the room. As he sat up, he blinked and looked around. This wasn't his room it was…
Watanuki.
All of a sudden, the events of the previous night came back. Watanuki's attempt at suicide, Doumeki barely making it in time. His revealing what was not meant to be revealed. And now, the seer was gone, slipped from his grasp. Was he going to try again? Determined not to be too late, he stood and strode out the door. Where was he? Living room - empty, but seals intact. Front door - seals intact. Kitchen - seals intact. Bathroom - locked.
“Oi! What are you doing in there?!”
“Oh, my god! What do you THINK I'm doing in here? What do people typically do in here?” he responded, but his voice sounded strained.
“Why does your voice sound weird?”
He heard panting.
“I don't. … Sound. … weird.”
What the hell was he doing?
“If you don't open this door, I'm going to break it down.”
“Are you some kind of pervert or something? Hah. Hah. Hah. I'm in the bathroom. Leave me alone.”
He waited a second. Then two. His hands were on the door frame, he stared at the door as if he could will it to disappear. The panting on the other side continued. Then, it stopped, and his heart about stopped in his chest. He leaned back, about ready to throw himself against the door, when the toilet flushed. And the sink ran. He sagged, again using the door frame to hold himself up.
And that's when the door opened, putting Watanuki and Doumeki face to face, mere inches apart.
“GAHHH!” the smaller boy screamed. “What the hell are you doing lurking like some gargantuan pervert outside of my bathroom? You scared me half to death!”
“I scared YOU?! You complete jackass! I thought you were…” His mouth tightened and he looked away.
“Well, you're wrong!” Watanuki practically screamed, his face red. “There's absolutely no way that I would have to do that! Oh my god, you're such a pervert! Thinking I'm doing that. And I'm sure you think it was all because of you, but you're wrong - because the great Watanuki-sama wouldn't do that. Ever. So you just couldn't be more wrong if you tried!”
Looking down at the ground, he said, “Never? You tried last night. But... you never have to again. Kunogi will-”
With a look of outrage, Watanuki hissed, “I did nothing of the kind last night!” And then he screamed, “And what are you implying about Himawari - because she's not that kind of girl! For you to even think that… Oh, my god! I just can't believe you!”
Okay, something here just didn't make sense. Did he block his memories of trying to commit suicide by spirit last night? What the hell!
“Oi!” he interrupted the ranting, “What exactly do you remember about last night?”
“What are you implying?!” he yelled.
His voice took the patient tone of someone working with injured animals or the dangerously insane, “Do you remember tearing down all the sutra?”
That pulled him back from rant as he remembered. Looking away from Doumeki, he muttered, “Yeah.”
“So you remember that you almost let yourself be eaten last night?” His tone had become impatient again.
He didn't nod or say yes, but the guilty way he looked away answered the question.
“Well, I don't know what YOU call that, but I call that a suicide attempt. Moron.”
“Don't call me a moron.”
“Then don't do moronic things. What the hell were you even thinking?”
“I…” He swallowed. “I just wanted you to be free. Shizuka, why do you always save me? Why do you do it?”
With a grimace he replied, “Because it's my choice.”
Shaking his head, he replied, “It just doesn't make sense. Why would you choose to save me when…”
“When what?”
“Nothing.”
Grabbing the arm of the teen, he said deliberately, “When. What?”
Fine, he wanted to know? Fine! “When you've got a girlfriend you love. Why do you keep helping me, saving me? Doesn't she miss you?” He practically spat the words out.
Blinking in confusion, Doumeki said slowly, “I already told you, I don't love Kunogi.”
“Not Himawari, I'm not talking about her. I'm talking about the girl you're in love with!”
He blinked again and said, “I'm not in love with a girl.”
Throwing down his arms, jerking away from the taller teen he spat, “Oh, don't lie to me. Haruka told me - well, he didn't tell me, but he confirmed it - that you're in love! If you're in love with this girl, you should spend as much,” he swallowed hard, “as much time as you can with her. You should be happy and stop… stop wasting your time with me.”
Shizuka paused and said softly, “I don't think time with you is a waste.”
Watanuki just rolled his eyes. “You're going to nitpick words? You know what I mean, Shizuka.”
And then, he noticed it. Shizuka. He'd called him…
It couldn't be.
But…
Throwing caution to the wind, Doumeki Shizuka, had a moment of purest bravery. “I'm not in love with a *girl*. Kimihiro.”
His eyes watched the boy carefully, waiting for a reaction. It was slow in coming. First, he shrugged, as if he hadn't really heard what the archer was saying. Then, the words sunk in and he sat up straighter, still not looking his way. Then, cautiously, he swiveled his head, his eyes first, his head lingering behind, as if he could look at the archer without him noticing.
Once he'd turned to where he could see, though, his eyes were captured by Doumeki's. But this couldn't be. Things did not work out like this for Watanuki Kimihiro. In his world, you fought the queen of spiders and demons tried to eat you and killed your parents. But… But Shizuka was looking at him so intently and… “You…”
The archer continued to watch, nervously waiting to see whether what he'd just admitted was understood, and if so, accepted.
“Shi… zuka…” he breathed. “I... Do you…”
Nodding, he replied, “Yes.”
Watanuki just stared. Then, he exploded. “Don't just agree to something until you've heard the question? You don't know what I was going to ask! I could have been asking, `Do you want me to stop making you lunches from now on'. Or `Do you mean you're in love with me?' It could have been anything.
“No, and yes,” he said quickly, before he lost his nerve.
The chef's mouth opened wide, and then shut with a click.
“Kunogi and I had to have something in common,” he said, completely deadpan.
“Why?” Watanuki's voice was barely a whisper.
Shizuka just shrugged in return.
Silently, the boy who had been alone for so long turned his back on the man who'd just admitted something he never thought to admit, and walked toward the bedroom. Doumeki felt his heart sink into his slippers. As if this night could get any worse.
He watched, acutely aware of the pain in his chest - it physically hurt, no small wonder it was called heartbreak - as Watanuki continued toward the bedroom.
That was it then. That was it.
And then.
At the door, the too-thin young man stopped and looked over at the tall, muscular boy in boxers. “Well, what are you waiting for! It's late! If we don't go to bed, we'll be in no shape for school in the morning!” He stomped into the bedroom and once again climbed under the covers. Doumeki followed, entered the room a bit hesitantly, walked around the bed and slowly climbed in, again staying as close to the edge as possible, for fear of scaring off the emotionally volatile seer.
Rolling his head around to look at him, Watanuki yelled, “What the hell are you doing?”
“Um. Lying down?”
“FEH! I'm cold. I'm sure that oversized ego of yours helps generate heat. Make yourself useful for once.”
Rolling over to look at him, he saw the red coloring flooding Watanuki's face. Still, he hesitated.
“I'm waiting!”
Okay, then. He rolled over and placed one arm across the boy who was lying on his side, facing away from him. He'd left a few inches between them as an air cushion. With a “Humph!” Watanuki skootched back, so that his back was resting securely against Doumeki's chest, pulling his arm around him more tightly.
“Shizuka, are you… sure you love me?”
It was interesting that he could actually feel the archer smirk into his hair as he replied, “Yeah. Pretty damned sure.” His fingertips began stroking the smooth skin of his love's tummy - like porcelain colored silk. It was reflex more than anything. That, and the thought that when he realized what Shizuka was doing, it would all be over.
A moan from Kimihiro had his heart stop, then begin hammering wildly in his chest. “Kimihiro?”
“Shizuka. I… I do, too, you know.”
Everything stopped in the room. It was as if time had frozen for Doumeki to process these words.
Suddenly, it was too much to take. The archer grabbed the seer, rolled him onto his back and kissed him.
`Oh!' Watanuki thought. `So that's it.' His hands grabbed at Doumeki, pulled him closer, closer. The feeling of Doumeki's tongue, rubbing against his own had his erection back and at full steam. He'd never felt anything like this. It was as an electric current was shooting straight from the archer's tongue, diverting momentarily to his nipples, then down to his groin. He moaned into the mouth of the man he loved.
Lips worked down his chin, down to his neck, sucking at the junction with his shoulder.
“Shizuka! Oh!” His hips thrust upward, to be met with Doumeki's own. Their erections pressed against each other, rubbing and Watanuki thought he'd pass out from the sensation. “Shizuka, I! I! Oh, god!”
With a fierce look, Shizuka pulled back and slipped his hand into his lover's shorts, wrapped his digits securely around his shaft. “You will never do anything as stupid as you did earlier tonight, ever again, will you?” His hand squeezed slightly on Watanuki's rod and he whimpered. “Will you?”
He shook his head no.
“Promise me.” Golden eyes held those of blue and bronze and willed him to understand.
“I… promise.”
The hand began to stroke him and Watanuki began to pant. “Hah. Hah. Hah.”
The sound he was making was so decadent and honest. And… familiar now. Suddenly, everything clicked. He wanted to laugh, but knew that would be a bad plan. Oh, god. Earlier, he'd been…
Smirking, his voice was a low rumble. “Were you thinking of me when you did this earlier, Kimihiro?” His hand was drying out, so he bent down and pushed the shorts completely off, then engulfed him with his mouth.
“How did you kno-OH! OH! Shizuka!” The sensations of Doumeki's mouth on his cock was unlike anything he'd ever imagined. He writhed and bucked. He wanted to reach out, touch him, but then, he was gone.
Watanuki looked around and Doumeki was nowhere to be seen. “Shi- Shizuka?” he called.
What the hell had just happened? Shizuka had kissed him, and he'd kissed back. Oh, yes. He definitely had kissed back. And then his hand, and then his mouth. Had he done something wrong? Had he…
Shizuka reappeared in the doorway, completely naked, with a huge erection, and sporting a bottle of lotion he'd grabbed from the bathroom.
As he knelt on the bed, he squirted a handful and then wrapped his hand around the seer's rod. Pumping furiously, he whispered, “What were you thinking of when you came in the bathroom, Kimihiro?”
“You're such… Gasp… a… pervert!”
“That's what you were thinking? That *I'm* a pervert? When you were-”
“No… I… was thinking…” the hand continued to stroke, to pump, and Kimihiro's head began to flail from side to side. “You. You. You.”
“What was I doing?” he had paused to put more lotion in both hands, returned one to Kimihiro and another on himself. “Was I touching you? Kissing you?”
“No.” His head flailed more violently now. “You… Were… Smiling.”
Well, that was unexpected.
“Don't. Don't ever. Leave. Me.” Kimihiro panted, “Please. God. Shizuka. I need you. I need you. Please stay with me! Shizuka, I love you. I love you. I love you. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” He came explosively, and the sight made Doumeki follow shortly after. They were both panting, but their eyes held each other as they recovered.
With one hand, Doumeki started to reach toward Kimihiro, then opened and closed his hand, testing the gumminess. “I'll be right back,” he said, as he stood, grabbing the lotion bottle, and walked back to the bathroom. About 40 seconds later, he was back with a damp towel in one hand. Tenderly, he wiped the residue off of his lover, then off himself. Tossing the rag toward the corner - they'd deal with it in the morning, he climbed back into bed and pulled the covers over them both.
Shizuka wrapped his arms around Kimihiro, who shyly did the same. “You okay?”
He nodded.
“Good.” He breathed in the scent of Watanuki's hair, kissed his head. “Don't ever disappear on me.”
“You… you either.” Kimihiro held out his pinky and Shizuka wrapped his own pinky around it, smiling.
“You! You smiled!” A look of wonderment painted his face.
“So?” he queried.
“Mmmm,” Kimihiro muttered and rolled into him, snuggling his lover tight.
Well, whatever it was, it could wait. He had him now, and he would never let him go.