Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction / Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Never Goodbye ❯ How Far Have I Fallen? ( Chapter 4 )

How Far Have I Fallen?

 

Why did this have to happen? His luck had always been bad, but this? Omi's heart hurt. So clearly he could see the moment play out again and again. What was he supposed to have done? Aya would have killed if allowed, and Omi really would never shoot his partner. Grabbing the crossbow had been just an impulse. But he had remedied his mistake, hadn't he?

 

This could have been looked over. It could have been seen as a slip-up due to stress and for once not knowing for certain what was going on, but things changed so quickly. The tears were allowed to run down his face, the boy not caring about the cold, unpleasant feel of them drying where they fell. He deserved to cry, to mourn, and to die if he was asked.

 

The look on Aya's face when the truth was finally revealed cut him to his already bleeding soul. Those beautiful eyes were unbelieving at first and then Omi thought his life was over. Nothing happened though. Only freezing stillness was what he got after that brief look of betrayal, and all the warmth previously infused between them was swept away. What was he suppose to do now? Their partnership couldn't continue, too much was between them.

 

“It's too cold to be out here in just shorts and that windbreaker, Omi.”

 

Omi kept the gasp from making it to Aya's ears. He needed to be calm. “I just wanted some time to think, Aya-kun.” He kept his back to him, hunched and the shudder not well hidden from knowing eyes.

 

“Do you regret what you've done?”

 

“No.”

 

“Do you understand why it had to be done and why it had to be you?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Do you mourn those things that called themselves your brothers?”

 

There was something in the older boy's voice that made Omi panic, forcing him to turn around and face his idol. “No, of course not!”

 

Aya's face became blank, eyes dark and lips firmly pressed together but when he spoke it was quite soft. “Will you cry for Takatori Reiji when his time runs out?”

 

“No.” Omi croaked, tears still clinging to his lashes. “It's just, this whole time, and I swear I'd—”

 

“This whole time you've been you. Listen because you know I don't repeat myself, you are not a Takatori. You said so yourself, why doubt it now?” His words caused a small, real smile to flutter across the archer's lips and Aya reached out to wipe the last tears away. Tears did not suit his partner in the slightest. “Tsukiyono Omi.” With a fleeting touch of his fingertips to flushed skin he was gone, Omi following soon after.

 

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“You're the devil!”

 

Passers-by to room 11 at the Americanized Budget Inn stuck on the outside of Tokyo paused at the sudden outburst and the chiming of childish giggles that followed. The occupants were not aware of the thin walls and doors and they did not care anyway if they were loud. This was a party after all. A private party.

 

Sprawled on his back on the itchy brown carpet, young agent Tsukiyono Omi laughed again at his slightly green partner. “That's not very nice, Asato.”

 

“Cruel child.” As if to validate such claims, the man's stomach made a peculiar noise.

 

Omi laughed and lay his head down. This felt nice. For the past three days they did nothing but walk about dark alleys and warehouses, chase down suspicious people who could perhaps tell them something, and sift through depressing files and gruesome pictures. What was wonderful was that they had gotten a lead. Before anything could be done they had to check back in. Feeling in such high spirits, the two celebrated on the last of their budget. Omi made his partner stay behind while he bought a few things. Much to his delight the kid returned with mainly candy and sugary goods.

 

Who knew a shinigami would get a tummy ache after six candy bars and five gummy zodiac trees?

 

“You don't have to eat every piece offered.”

 

“You know I will though.” Omi enjoyed that whiny tone.

 

“I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you.” Omi pushed off of the floor and scampered to the bathroom. Asato heard the faucet running and the clinking of glass as he leaned his head back on the bed behind him, eyes closing in calm content. “Here you go. Drink it all, Asato-kun, you'll feel better.”

 

Asato sat back up to find Omi crouched before him, holding a cup of fizzing water for him. He was so cute! “Thank you, `Mi-chan!” Omi blushed and kept his eyes down when his beaming partner took his offered cure.

 

“No problem at all.” He was quick with his reply and scooted away to sit a few feet from him.

 

Eyes locked for a mere second and Asato's undead heart thudded hard inside his chest. So many contrasting feelings fluttered through him when those damning blue eyes would look right into him and then flicker away as if his image burned him. After swallowing half of his drink in one gulp and studying his now silent partner, he had to speak up.

 

“Omi-chan, why do you do that to me?”

 

For his part, Omi did his best impersonation of an owl as the question registered in his brain. “What do you mean, Asato-kun?” Had he upset the man?

 

“I try so hard not to notice, tell myself that it doesn't mean anything, but it does. It hurts when you do that.” Asato whispered his torment and Omi instantly crawled to his side.

 

“What have I done, Asato-kun? Please tell me.” A blush crept over his cheeks when his hand was taken into the others and held in the most intimate, delicate way he hadn't felt in a long time.

 

“Why does it hurt you to look into my eyes?” He felt Omi try to pull away and only held on tighter. “Are they that awful?”

 

Omi stopped trying to free himself, however subtle the resistance, and gave Asato the saddest smile he ever saw. “It's not anything like that, Asato, please don't think that.”

 

“Then what is it?” Asato coaxed the boy ever so closer, brushing blonde hair away from his face. Already he had taken such a liking to the young guardian and being the cause of any of his discomfort made him ache. Omi opened his mouth but seemed to chicken out on his vocalization and instead dropped down against Asato's chest, willing the emotions away from his voice and eyes. “Please tell me.” It felt natural to bring his arms up and around his slim waist.

 

“When I was alive, I knew someone with eyes just like yours.” Asato held him tighter. This was the first time the kid was speaking of his past life. “Eyes the rarest and most beautiful I had ever seen. There were times I thought my soul was taken just by looking into those deep purple eyes. I would have gladly given him my soul just to stay by his side.”

 

“You loved this man?” Asato couldn't stop the pain from filling his heart at the thought of such a young and tragic union. Although now he knew his partner didn't think him a freak.

 

“I still do.” Immediately Omi piped up his answer.

 

“Did this guy love you as well?”

 

Omi smiled, snuggling close. “Yeah, he did. Ran tried to hate me, I tried to feel nothing for him, and we both failed miserably.” A tear slipped free only to be wiped away instantly.

 

Asato asked no more. Minutes ticked by and he continued holding and petting the boy while Omi let himself enjoy the feeling. It felt so long since he had received such treatment. But this kind of thing would lead to a want for more, by someone who could no longer give him what he longed for, and so Omi made himself think of other things. A thought occurred to him, and since Asato made him talk, he wanted answers too.

 

“Asato?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Why did Kurosaki-san go on leave?” He was only Asato's temporary partner and even though he wanted to know, no one told and he never asked.

 

Asato closed his eyes, stilling the emotions that name invoked inside him and after taking a breath, looked down at the cherub staring up at him. “How much do you know about mine and Hisoka's relationship?”

 

Omi was surprised by this question but answered quickly anyway. “You two were very close, made a good team.”

 

Asato nodded, a sad shimmer coming to his eyes. “We had tried a romantic relationship before he left.” He didn't want to talk about this, but it was only fair after their previous subject. “After what happened in Kyoto, what happened with Muraki… Hisoka and I started acting on the feelings we held for each other. Nothing serious had happened, but one night things started becoming more… aggressive, I guess you could say. I screwed up.” Asato took another deep breath and squeezed Omi tighter, the contact kept his shame and sadness at bay.

 

“Hisoka got over so many of his demons to be with me, to try and get a good thing going. He put his past behind him. However strong he is though, me calling out his killer's name while being intimate was a shock to his system. I don't know why I did it. I don't want anyone else but Hisoka. Lost in the moment or stress, I suppose. I begged and pleaded for him to understand that I had just made a terrible mistake. The worst thing is, Hisoka knew. I know he was hurt but he only said he understood and gave me a kiss before leaving. The next day he was gone when I arrived at work and I was told of his wanting to take a break. He needed time to think and clear his mind - to get away from me.”

 

Omi stayed silent through this story. This was a surprise. Asato didn't seem the type to do such a thing, but he didn't know him before and it was not his place to judge. It seemed his partner was doing that enough. Finding nothing to say in a situation such as this, the mild-mannered boy let himself be held, let his friend find comfort in his warmth. For the first time since his death, Omi felt a stab of loneliness and wrapped his own arms around the body against his. Lifting his head, his eyes found those of his partner and shortly after found his lips brushing against Asato's. It was comfortable, stable, and warm and for the both of them it was enough.