Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ Hisoka Doll ❯ Dreamless Slumber ( Chapter 8 )

Title: Hisoka Doll

Author: Elf Asato

Pairings: A little bit of each: Tsu+Hi, Mu+Hi ("moo-hee" ^_^), Tat+Hi, and…*fanfare* Tsu+Tat+Hi ^_~

Warnings: General weirdness, OOC Hisoka (finally explained ^_^;;)

Disclaimer: My backwards little town finally had the Descendants of Darkness DVD in stock and I bought it! I was actually surprised and somewhat…pleased…with it! A friend had filled my head with opinions on how horrible the voices were (which I relayed to Mirai K ^^;;), but the only voice that was absolutely horrid and I couldn't get used to was my dear Watari's! *sigh* Hisoka's took a little while to get used to, but…it…it actually grew on me and I really like it now @_@ Tsuzuki's reminded me of Gene from Outlaw Star, which was okay, but the GuShoShin voices…O.o…they were just too weird… Anyway, I don't really see how that has to do with anything…except that I now own the first DVD…so please don't sue because I luff it! *huggles DVD*

Spoilers: Slightly modified spoilers for the Kyoto Arc…

Notes: Thank you everyone for continuing to follow this fic through all the creepiness and complete and utter crap! Thank you! And…it was V. C. Andrew's "Flowers in the Attic" where the grandmother tried to poison her grandchildren with arsenic…makes sense now! Thank you Nagibook! ^_^ v *has to go read that book now* …And thank you, Erin-chan, for helping and inspiring me with the beginning!

Chapter summary: The "omelet" chapter… (Everything's rolled up, eaten, and digested…or…something like that…)

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Hisoka Doll

By Elf Asato

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Eighth Chapter

"Dreamless Slumber"

Not him…why?!

The image of Muraki Kazutaka, the man who violated my innocence and killed me slowly…tortured me even after death…and became my reason for living beyond material bounds, lingered like the smoke from those awful cigarettes.

It can't be!

And just like the very smoke he slowly kills himself with, the image disappeared and only its emotional imprint remained in my heart.

I don't want it to be!

I hugged myself slightly - I was so scared…just by even seeing him…and at that very moment, I'd never wanted to see Tsuzuki more in my life.

Tsuzuki!

I looked around and felt so alone…not even Tatsumi was there with me. He…he wouldn't have gone and left me - he wouldn't!

I…I'm so scared! I need you, Tsuzuki!

Hisoka!

Hisoka?

Tsuzuki!

Hisoka!

Tat…sumi…

Kurosaki-kun…?

Hi…soka…?

I'm not that scared anymore…

Hi…Kurosaki Hisoka!

Funny…I feel so warm…

What are you…?

…Tsuzuki…!

Hi-Hisoka!

Hisoka!

…Whoever the hell you are, I don't care! I need you!

I…please wake up!

I…

Tch.

Tsuzuki…

Please…Hisoka…

…Please…

…All right…

I don't feel so bad anymore…

"Hisoka!" Tatsumi's voice bounced in my brain, slightly jarring, but very comforting. "Hi…Hisoka! You're waking up…"

I sighed and yawned, realizing that Tatsumi had a tight hold on me. "Ugh," I grunted, resting my head on his chest with a god-awful headache…

"I was getting very worried. You've been asleep for an hour since I woke up…and no matter how hard I tried, you just wouldn't wake up…" he continued, his voice soft and tightly controlled…but worry and relief seemed to slip through.

My cheeks flushed, suddenly feeling ashamed for making him worry. "I…I'm sorry…"

"It's alright," he said softly as he continued to hold me, "just as long as you're okay."

"…Thank you, Tatsumi-san," I whispered as I continued to rest my head on his chest, listening to that comforting heartbeat.

I could tell he didn't really want to ask… "So…what are you going to do now?"

"…About what?"

"…Him."

Keeping my head still on his chest, my green eyes looked up into his and searched for an answer. "…I don't know," I finally answered. "I don't think there's anything to do…but still…why…? …Why him?" Closing my eyes I buried my face in his chest and asked in a whisper, "Why Muraki?"

Tatsumi was silent…contemplating this, probably. After a few minutes, he spoke up, "He must not have had a very good childhood, and that's something that never left him. Something he hadn't quite gotten over… I honestly don't know, but…whatever the reason, his reached out to you for help."

"…I could feel that he was still alive, even after what happened in Kyoto, so is that why his heart…?" I asked, muffled in Tatsumi's warm and comforting chest.

"I don't know," he began apologetically, "I'm not him, so I couldn't tell you exactly what he wanted. All I can do…is help you deal with this."

We were silent for a bit, holding each other like that, when I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck in an affectionate hug. "Thank you," I said simply.

My bedroom door burst open and there Tsuzuki was, looking as if he had run a mile. "Hisoka, I-!" He stopped in mid-sentence as he turned a red tint, seeing us hugging on my bed. "I - I - I only - I - sorry!" he panicked, running out of my room just as quickly as he had come in.

A few seconds went by in silence as we tried to register what just happened. "I think," Tatsumi said finally with an embarrassed smile as we both looked at each other, "that Tsuzuki got the wrong idea."

~*~

"…Why didn't you tell me about this?" Tsuzuki asked softly, staring at cup of coffee I had made him from his spot beside Tatsumi on the couch. I feel him thinking deeply about the entire issue after Tatsumi and I explained everything to him - the dreams, the doll, the scar, and Muraki.

It was hard to explain. "…I…I couldn't." Seeing that vaguely hurt expression on his face made me feel awful for everything. "Please understand me, Tsuzuki… Muraki saw you in my dream and although I don't think his heart knew that it was you…he considered you a…a…"

"A threat? Something in the way of you?" Tsuzuki finished for me, his eyes a mixture of both happy and sad emotions.

"…Yes," I softly said, staring down at my hands as I sat alone on my sofa. "I just…couldn't. I'm sorry, Tsuzuki."

I looked up just in time to see him smile for me, "It's alright, Hisoka. I understand." And his eyes told me that he did. "You know," he began, "…while we were in Kyoto, Muraki told me a lot…about himself…and me."

"You never told me this," Tatsumi said calmly, taking a sip of the coffee he held.

Tsuzuki just smiled apologetically and continued, "…He didn't have a happy childhood; his mother thought of him only as a doll to add to her collection and he was in constant rivalry with his half-brother…"

His "mistress" and the one he hated…

"I have no doubt that he loved with his entire heart as a child…but unfortunately as he grew older, that became nearly impossible due to the emotional trauma he experienced as a child… I know that no matter how many times he said it, Muraki never really meant it when he said that loved me. …But even though he may not have consciously realized it…the person he came closest to loving…was you, Hisoka," Tsuzuki finished with a smile full of mixed emotions.

That's all I could feel from him - mixed emotions.

"That's probably why his heart reached out to Hisoka of all people… His empathy and the fact that he's played such a large part of our dear empath's life and afterlife as well made it especially easy - and is probably the reason why the alternate reality Muraki created in Hisoka's dreams carried over to our reality," Tatsumi analyzed, glancing at my scar. "I noticed something that intrigued me, though, while I was in your dream with you…"

I looked at him questioningly and asked, "You did?"

Tatsumi nodded slightly and said, "You seemed to lack your usual…bitterness and hostility."

"Are you implying that I'm an unpleasant person when I'm awake?"

Tsuzuki let out a short giggle as Tatsumi simply smiled, "Of course not."

"I think what Tatsumi's trying to say," Tsuzuki interjected with an appreciative nod from the secretary, "is that your heart recognized Muraki not as the murderer and rapist he was to you…but as the gentle child he used to be."

"Though, when you were awake, it seemed you were even more bitter and hostile than usual," Tatsumi observed, smiling gently as if to tell me that he didn't quite mean it like that. "Perhaps it was your mind trying to balance itself out?"

"I…hadn't noticed," I muttered, and in truth, I hadn't. A question had been burning in my mind, though, "…Now that I've helped him let go of his childhood…what now? I mean…is he going to change? How is he going to be?"

All light faded from Tsuzuki as he contemplated my question with Tatsumi, finally stating, "I don't know and I hope I never find out."

I just gave him a smile and he seemed to like that because his entire body lit up.

"One thing's been bothering me," Tatsumi spoke up, obviously thinking about his question. "…If Muraki's alternate reality in your dream carried over into our reality…then how were you able to drink cyanide? …I've been wondering that…"

Silence followed his question as we all tried to think. "Muraki really thought he was a doll from his mother and that thinking carried over to Hisoka," Tsuzuki said softly, "so in his mind, Hisoka could drink any kind of poison just as he could without being harmed by it. Muraki spent his entire life building a resistance to poisons."

"Why would anyone want to do that?" Tatsumi softly mused aloud.

Tsuzuki just smiled and stood up with a yawn, stretching, "Anyway, I'm glad to see that you're alright now, Hisoka…but it's nearly midnight…"

I yawned because he yawned, which set Tatsumi off yawning as well. "Tsuzuki's right," he sighed, "it's late and we still have work tomorrow…"

"Y-you guys are…leaving?" I asked shakily, growing afraid of the fact that I would be alone that night after that.

Tatsumi and Tsuzuki exchanged looks, reading something in each other that I obviously, to my resentment, couldn't. "Not if you don't want us to," they said.

"Well, we do have work tomorrow," I muttered, trying to look away.

Tsuzuki pounced beside me on the sofa, startling the hell out of me. "We live close together, so it's all right!"

I tried to voice my protest, but my throat produced no sound - instead, I tried to get the pity of Tatsumi, but I found him just smiling at me with an incredibly amused expression on his face. "It's already late… Shouldn't we get to sleep now?"

Bastards.

"Come on!" Tsuzuki chirped, dragging me off my sofa, picking me up, and taking me to my room with me struggling all the while.

Tatsumi followed us in and shut the door behind him.

Setting me down on my bed, Tsuzuki curled up beside me with his arms around me in such a way that I couldn't possibly escape from his grip. By that time, I thought my face was going to disappear and be replaced with one giant blush.

The light switch flipped off and as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I could feel Tatsumi climb into my bed on the other side of me. Eventually, both men held me in their arms silently.

Tsuzuki, on my left, sighed and he snuggled closer to me.

"Ah…thank you…Tatsumi, Tsuzuki…for being here," I whispered, blushing even in the darkness.

Tatsumi didn't say anything, but he shifted his head slightly so that his cheek was resting gently at the top of my head. Tsuzuki, though, buried his face in my neck and muttered, "How could I resist you when you called out for me?"

"…What?" I asked in surprise, feeling another hot wave of blushes.

He yawned in my neck and sighed, "That's why I came. I was just up reading when I heard your heart call out to me. …I realized it was you and I didn't hesitate to come be by your side…"

"I…called out for you?" I whispered, my throat developing a knot.

Tsuzuki just nodded in my neck, yawned, and started to say something else, but Tatsumi silenced him with a sleepy "shh" and rested his arm on my chest, absent-mindedly playing with Tsuzuki's hair until he fell asleep…

And then I followed into a peaceful, dreamless slumber.

Chapter End

Ending notes: The Tsu+Tat+Hi-ness just kinda happened… I had no control over it XD! Even though I am a "closet TatxHi" fan (^_^), their relationship in this isn't really like that in this fic. …Okay, think that Hisoka sees Tatsumi sort of as a father and…Tsuzuki as a mother… …Now make him incestual…

After writing that, I just lost all sight of where I was going with this… Now I have this half-formed incestual Hisoka thought… Oh well.

Anyway…this chapter is kinda sad because there's just the epilogue after this…and then…I'm DONE! NOO!!!!!! I wish I could keep on writing this forever… T.T I said I'd thank everyone, so I went back and saved all the review pages so I could do this at…*looks at clock*…midnight ^_^

Lily: You were my first review! *gets all nostalgic* Anyway, thank you!

Panatlantic: Thank you very much for being there from the very beginning and liking this!

Hard_Cover: Glad you enjoyed this! *distributes Hisoka dolls…*

Morien Alexander: Thank you very much! You probably never realized it, but you gave me a lot of inspiration by constantly saying how creepy this is ^_^ …More than once, I've thought about drawing this out, but I'm a horrid artist ^^;;

Twylise: I'm glad you've enjoyed this and stayed with me since the beginning! (And thank you for complementing me on my "style." But what style? XD) Sorry about driving you insane with the story, though, and making you wait so long ^_~

Subaru Sumeragi: I'm glad you liked the concept, but sorry for scaring you ^^;; *write, write, write*

Mirai Kurosaki: Thank you so much for helping me with this! (You did help me get some of the "hard-to-write" chapters out by working on Akusho while talking to me…and in the process making me feel guilty for going so long between chapters…)

Sleine: I'd be interested to hear how this related to you O.o… Was the doll who you thought it was? ^_~

Icediamond: Sorry I confused you!

Silver-Winged-Angel: Sorry for scaring you! XD

MiZu-cHan: When I first thought of this, it never occurred to me that it would come out as weird and creepy as it did ^_^

Sherbie: Your review was so elegant! *squeals* I like the concept, too! ^_^ v

Literary Eagle: Thank you for liking this! It makes me happy! *gives you a Michiko bear to spread the happiness*

Rinoa Redcloak: Eh heh…I'm glad this is one of the most disturbing things you've ever read? Anyway, thank you for liking this so much!

Sotty-chan: Thank you for liking this and continuing to read it! o^_^o

Nagibook: Thank you for the information about that book ^_^ I have to go and read it now XD

Erin-chan: *gives you a Michiko bear* There, there! The waiting's almost over!