Disclaimers: If I owned Yami no Matsuei… *goes and reads an entire novel of all possibilities there is, if the priceless artwork was owned* See? In other words, I don't own it, because those possibilities never came true. A certain literary genius (and should I say exceptional artist) named Matsushita Yoko does, and she deserves all the credit. I am but a lowly fan.

Also, I took the title from the Yami no Matsuei soundtrack (Hiro no Tsuki) track 20. The title in Japanese is "Tozasareta Kokoro". I found the translated title at Theria's merchandise info.

Warnings: shounen ai, yaoi, angst, all the usual stuff that makes Yami no Matsuei so enjoyable to read.

This is my first attempt to write in Hisoka's POV. Please be nice.

"… these wounds won't seem to heal

this pain is just too real

there's just too much that time can not erase…"

~Evanescence (My Immortal)

Locked Heart

First, give me time to recall what exactly happened that got us into this. We were just out for a stroll in Chijou. Tsuzuki insisted that we go there to buy some of his favorite sweets that he didn't get the chance to eat for a while. Tsuzuki? Tsuzuki Asato not eating sweets? Yes, I'm not joking. It's because he was bedridden for the past few weeks, and so was I. Mine was nothing, just a few bruises and burns here and there. Tsuzuki had more serious injuries. Not just physically speaking, but more on emotional wounds. Muraki's little game with us in Kyoto did more harm to my partner than necessary. And I'll never forgive him for that. Ever.

Tsuzuki pretends that he's perfectly fine now, but only an idiot would fall for his façade. Even with his outwardly genki smile, inside, he's still nursing fresh wounds. He simply doesn't want people to worry about him. Ironically though, he's a worrywart himself. He fusses a lot over small things like my poor eating habits, pushing myself too much and all that crap. He really loves to meddle, but he never really opens up to anyone. And even until now, he doesn't share anything about his past at all. No one knows what happened before Tsuzuki became a shinigami… not Tatsumi-san, not Watari-san, and not even me, his 'probably permanent' partner. I think only Kachou and Enma-sama have an idea. And, no, them talking about it is definitely out of the question.

Despite his unknown history, everyone who comes across Tsuzuki learns to love him fairly quickly. Maybe it's got something to do with his childish ways. Like his annoying whining and turning into a little puppy. He also has a very lethal puppy look whenever he wants something. But all in all, he's cute that way. More than that, he has a very reassuring aura about him. He sure knows how to make anyone feel safe and that's exactly how he affects me… even to this very moment.

It all happened so fast. One moment we were just exiting the sweets shop (where we've been in for about three hours) and on our way back to Meifu, then the next thing I know there were these weird guys after us. They just popped out of nowhere, and at the worst timing too.

We were just trying to find an empty spot, where there'd be no one to see us just vanish. We spotted a dark alley and headed right into it, thinking that it was the best place where we can do it. It was then that these strangers appeared and attacked us.

You see, we can teleport, the thing is, it has to done be away from human eyes. It's basic shinigami rule really. And another one is, never engage in an unnecessary battle. That's what held us back, and led us right into this mess.

It's weird. I'm sure that I felt something… how should I put it… 'different'… about these guys, I just can't put my finger on it. I warned Tsuzuki, told him that it's probably best to knock them out and just modify their memories afterwards, but he just wouldn't listen. He firmly said that he doesn't want to hurt anyone anymore. With what happened in Kyoto still plaguing him, he wouldn't consent to the idea of fighting back. Fine, so I decided that the best thing we could do was just, well, run for it. Just try to lose them if we can.

Easier said than done.

No matter how fast we ran, they still tailed us. This made my suspicion stronger. Normal humans would never have been able to catch up with the speed of a shinigami. We were specially trained. Hey, even if I don't look it, I'm a fast runner too you know. Less weight boosts my speed. It's really a big help that I maintain a small body… even if it might eventually be the death of me. Second death, I mean.

We saw another dim alleyway and turned there. Wrong move. We ended up at a dead end, and there we got cornered. It was only then that I got a closer look at our aggressors. With the help of the lamppost that stood on the edge of this alley, I was able to make out their features. Disturbing. That's how I'd describe them. Their eyes looked ordinary form afar, but at this close range, I could tell that they look unusual. It's like, there's no soul behind those depths.

Then it hit me.

The last time I saw that kind of look was from Tsuzuki, and back then he was possessed by that creepy demon while protecting Hijiri.

These men weren't on their right minds. Someone, or something, was manipulating them. I had no choice. I didn't care if Tsuzuki got mad with me for my actions. But I had this sudden urge in me to get us out of this situation. And quick.

I pulled out a fuda and started to chant. Then I threw it at them. Nothing too harmful. It was just a paralysis charm, much like the one I used on Tsuzuki on our, er, memorable first meeting. Only this time, I used it in talisman form, which means it's more controlled. Too controlled, if I may say so, because the charm didn't even last a full minute. They were able to dispel it. I tried to do it again, but just yielded the same result.

I then decided to use jitsu when I felt Tsuzuki's hand stop me. I was just about to argue with him when I saw one of them sprinting towards us at the corner of my eye. I pushed Tsuzuki away by instinct. I raised my right arm to shield myself, then felt a sudden jolt of pain. I opened my eyes and saw blood. The dagger pierced through my skin and left a deep wound.

Funny, I never thought an injured arm could hurt so much. Just a few weeks ago, Oriya-san almost tore my body in half and it wasn't this painful. Or maybe I just didn't notice it, because all the time I was thinking about Tsuzuki. About bringing him back.

Speaking of Tsuzuki, right after I got hurt he seemed to have lost his temper and punched the daylights out of the guy who stabbed me. He did the same to all of his companions too. Under any other circumstances, it would've been touching how he lost his cool for me. You see, he crumpled down right after and shook his head frantically, chanting 'I shouldn't have done that' over and over again.

Out of the blue, lightning illuminated the night and thunder roared. Rain followed. Talk about special effects. I rushed to his side and tried to comfort him. I raised my voice loud enough to rival the volume of the rain, and kept on telling that it wasn't his fault and that he had no other choice. And yet, he still wouldn't listen at all.

At any rate, I helped him up and tried to teleport us both back to Meifu, only, I fell right back down, and even dragged Tsuzuki with me. I felt weak. Then I noticed for the first time that my wound hasn't healed yet. It was supposed to have regenerated already by now.

The rain still continued to pour down. I don't know if it was just me, or the wind was blowing harder, because I felt so cold. I began to shiver and desperately hugged myself for warmth. Soaked, shivering, and bleeding at the moment, I felt my senses start to fade away. The last thing I remembered was Tsuzuki keeping me in his arms and calling out my name.

~*~*~*~

How did it go? Comments? Anyone?