Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ Two of a Kind ❯ Ketessa? ( Chapter 3 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters of Yami No Matsuei. I wish I did, but if I did I would not being writing fanfiction.
Warning: Bad language and a lot angst from Tsuzuki and Kira.
Summary: It has been two years after Kyoto and Muraki appears once again. Muraki and Tsuzuki both have changed since then and are learning from their past mistakes. What does that mean for those two? A young girl comes into the picture and asks for help. Who is this girl and what does she want from Muraki and Tsuzuki?
Notes: This is my third chapter to Two of a Kind. Thanks for your reviews. In this chapter there will be more revealed about Kira, the mysterious girl who just appeared out of no where.

Chapter Three: Ketessa?

Waking up on the ground, I remember that a soldier attacked us. I look at my lover who is on the ground looking at Tsuzuki with sadness in his eyes. Standing up, I ask, "What happened?" No one answers and I notice Kazutaka on the ground with blood on his body. Oh, no. Please don't tell me he stepped in the way.

Mr. Tatsumi speaks up, "Tsuzuki, we have to report this."

Tsuzuki responds, "They won't do a damn thing about it. They won't care about Kazutaka."

Seeing the tears roll down his face, I reply, "If they don't, then they will pay for it." Everyone looks at me including Tsuzuki. I had enough of this going on. First it was my niece, and now my best friend is gone because of them.

Kira resorts with anger in her voice, "They will pay no matter what."

Mr. Keyis looks at her and asks, "Is that wise? I mean . . . "

She cuts him off with tears in her eyes, "I do not think you understand, Keyis, Kazutaka was like a father to me. He forgot about me because of Saki. Do you see what they have done? They went after my family."

It is hard to believe that the others feel pain for Kazutaka's death, but I guess it is because of their friend's pain. He looks like he is out of it. Speaking up while I walk to Hiso, "I will handle everything for his funeral."

Tsuzuki asks, "Can I come?"

Looking over at him, I respond, "You may stay here as long as you wish and attend. You were his lover and I will respect Muraki's wishes." Tsuzuki nods to me and one of my girls walk out with fear in their eyes from the scene she sees. I reply, "Do not tell anyone else about this and call Qu for me." She nods and walks back inside. Walking to Tsuzuki and putting my hand on his shoulder, I resort, "I am sorry, Tsuzuki. I really am. He loved you with his entire heart. He told me once that he wished he realized back then that he was in love with you, then he would have stopped what he was doing sooner." Tsuzuki looks at me with a false smile and hugs me. It is hard for me to comfort a man whom I once hated because of Kazutaka and because he slept with my lover. Looking over everyone else, I resort, "You may stay but do not think I will be hospitality to you." Mr. Keyis only nods to me and walks inside.

Katrina walks out with the wireless phone and replies, "Mr. Qu is on the phone, Master Oriya."

Taking the phone, I resort to Katrina, "Thank you." She nods and walks inside with tears in her eyes. I forgot how the girls enjoyed Kazutaka's visits. Speaking to Qu while I lean against the wall, "Qu, I need a favor."

He responds, "I figured that much. What is it?"

Watching my lover taking Tsuzuki into his arms, I ask, "Will you cover up a murder from the authorities for me?" Knowing full well that Qu will do it or I will reveal his little secrets. He does not wish that. It will ruin his image.

Qu replies, "Yes. Who's murder?"

Looking over at my friend's body, I answer, "Kazutaka Muraki." Qu grasps at the name. He also knows that I have covered up his murders. Of course he will be surprise of his death. It is so hard for me right now. How can I do this? He was my best friend. I will not let anyone but Hiso see my pain behind these eyes.

Qu explains, "Of course, I will. I do wonder how that man could be killed, but I understand you will not reveal any details. Do you need anything else, Oriya?"

Seeing Kira walk inside, I answer, "Yes. I need things taken care of for his funeral."

Qu replies, "Done. Good-bye, Oriya. I am sorry for your loss."

Hanging up the phone, I explain, "Everything will be taken care of. Tsuzuki, why don't you go inside and rest for a while." He nods to me and Hiso helps him up to take him inside. I will say nothing about this. If anyone can help Tsuzuki, it will be Hiso and I will not get in the way of that. Muraki would hurt me if I let anything happen to his lover.

Mr. Watari mumbles, "We may not have liked Muraki, but we are sorry."

Lighting up a cigarette, I reply, "I know you are sorry because it hurt your friend, but I give you may word that Mr. Carton will pay for what he did."

Mr. Tatsumi responds, "I will make sure of it personality, Mr. Oriya."

Sure he will. The death of Kazutaka hurt his love. Watching them walk inside to check on their friend, I whisper, "Oh, Kazu. How could you? It would have done nothing to Hiso." Maybe it would have harmed him. Kazutaka would not end his own life if Hiso could heal after being stabbed. Walking to my friend's body, I mumble while tears roll down my face, "Oh, Kazu. You did not deserve this."

Throwing a glass at my bedroom wall, I mumble in anger, "You will pay for taking his life. I swear it." How could this happen? Kazutaka must have sensed the power that was in that sword. The power of Icona, which holds the power to end an immortal's life. Sitting on my bed, I think, "How could Carton gain a weapon with the power of Icona?" It is time to figure out what is going on and how many traitors are inside. This will not be easy. It is my fault. I should have known.

It was a cold winter day when I walk to his house with my mother. Walking inside with my mother, I ask, "Who are we meeting, mother?" This is the first time I am going to meet any of my mother's friends. A tall man with platinum blonde hair and he wears white from his head to his feet walk down the stairs. He is beautiful and I can sense a warm personality in him. Is he the one who has my mother's heart? Feeling his pain as well, I think, "He had a horrible child hood. He is like me." Could he help me get past my pain? Will he help me? He seems nice enough to help out with anything. He must care dearly for the people who are close to him. I hope I can be one of those people.

He asks with a surprise look on his face, "Cease, what are you doing here?" He looks at me and asks, "Who is this young beautiful girl?"

Mother replies, "Sorry to bother you, Kazutaka, but I need a favor." She points to me and explains, "This is my daughter, Kira."

Bowing my head, I mumble, "A pleasure of meeting you, Mr. Kazutaka." He smiles at me and I know we will get along. I wish mother did not have to leave for a while. It makes me sad that I will be left behind, but I understand she has to travel and it is too hard for her to take me with her. She would not be around to watch me every second anyways.

Kazutaka asks, "What kind of favor do you need, Cease?"

She answers with a soft voice, "I have to go on a business trip and I was wondering if you could take Kira in for a couple of weeks."

He looks at her and resorts in a silk voice, "Of course. I am sure she will be fine here."

My mother kisses my forehead as she whispers, "Now, you be good for Kazutaka."

Nodding my head, I answer, "Of course." She walks out of the house. I look at the man whom I will be living with for a couple of weeks. He seems nice. Usually I feel scared with everyone else, but I do not with him. Why is that? He is the one whom my mother trusts with her life. There is something else that draws me to him. Wondering this as I watch every move he makes. Feeling his heart belongs to someone else, I wonder with amazement, "He loves another man."

Kazutaka asks, "How old are you, Kira?"

Responding to him while I look at my feet, "I just turned seven." He lifts my chin up to look at him and he smiles at me. I notice he is looking at my eyes. He must know who my father is. I can sense he is surprise by my eye color, but he is not afraid of it. I am glad. Everyone else says mean things to me. It hurts but mother told me that I should ignore them. It makes no difference by my eye color. I whisper, "I am glad you are not scared of me."

He is taken back by my comment as he asks with concern in his voice, "Why would I be?"

Answering him while I look past him, "Others think they are unnatural. They hate me. I can feel their emotions." Why did I tell him that? I have never told my mother that. He must have some kind of power to have me to tell the truth. I only have told lies when people asked how I could know how the feel.

That was the first time I met him. Why did he not remember? What did Saki do to him? His revenge was to Saki, the man who murdered my mother and I. It has been too long. The pain I felt in him was so great. It seems that everyone close to me is killed for knowing me. It is now or never. It is time for revenge. I hear a knock at my door as I reply, "Come in." Mr. Tatsumi walks in and bows his head to me. Wondering while I stand up, "What does he want?" He looks at the glass on the floor and I ask, "What?"

He answers while looking past me, "I want to help you."

He wants to help me. How does he think he will help me? Will he betray a place that he owes his life to? Walking to the window and looking out of it, I ask, "Are you willing to betray the place you work for, Mr. Tatsumi?"

He replies without hesitation, "Yes."

Mr. Tatsumi is a fool. He will be killed the moment they learn he works for me. Turning around to face him, I explain, "You will die and bring more pain to Asato." He stares at me with confusion written in his eyes. Grabbing my cigarettes off the night stand and lighting one up, I explain, "He does care for you even if he does not love you. It will hurt him the most and I cannot allow that." No, I will not bring any more pain to him. Him who can bring me freedom. The person who is more than he will ever know. I could tell him the truth, but I can never find the right words. It is time to call in a favor.

Mr. Tatsumi responds, "He will go into a depression and he might go after them, himself. I will let no harm come to him."

So, he does care dearly for Asato. Does he even realize that his heart belongs to someone else? I guess not or he would not think he is in love with Asato. Things happen for a reason. Exhaling the smoke from my mouth, I resort in a cold voice, "I do not need your help, Mr. Tatsumi. Do as you please, but stay out of my way." He will only get in my way. I will not allow that. Mr. Tatsumi cannot see what is in front of him. Mr. Watari walks in and bows his head to me. Now, this is interesting. I ask, "What is it that you want, Mr. Watari?"

He looks at me then at Mr. Tatsumi before he answers, "I know you two are planning something and I want in."

Sensing both of these men want revenge for the loss they see in their friend's eyes, I mumble, "Get the hell out of here! Believe me when I say this, you will die. Everyone who gets involve with me dies." I have learned that the hard way. No one can stay alive with me around. That is my curse and my hell. Watching the two of them leave without questioning me, I think, "You are better off." It hurts so much. Asato, please free me from this curse, the curse we share. It is the only way for us to be free. Speaking out loud as I look out the window with tears rolling down my face, "I am sorry, Asato. I should have protected Kazutaka."

A male's voice rings through my ears, "It is not your fault. Please don't blame yourself."

Turning around to face sadness in purple eyes, I explain, "But it is my fault." Putting out my cigarette, I reply, "I should have known that Carton had the power to kill an immortal. I sensed he worked for Saki. I should . . . " My words are stopped by the sobs that come out of my throat. Why is it that I can show my emotions to this man? He is the same as Kazutaka. Feeling warm arms embracing me, I whisper into his chest, "How can you forgive someone who . . . "

He cuts me short, "Don't blame yourself. It was Carton who killed Kazutaka."

Sensing the pain in his words, but also revenge, I ask, "What will you do if you see Carton again?" He does not answer my question, but I sense that he will end Carton's life if he ever sees him again. The pain in Asato's soul is so great. There are memories that he wishes to forget and there are some that he has forgotton. It is time. I have no choice. Please forgive me, Lord Emna. It is I, who will turn my back on you. It is I who will declare an all out war.

The pain I felt within Tsuzuki was so over whelming. He left me alone so I can recover my sanity. Why did he save my life? I sensed that power within that sword. He should have not saved my life. It would have not brought this much pain to Tsuzuki. He should have been thinking that instead of my welfare. Feeling strong arms wrap around my waist, I whisper, "I am sorry. It is my fault."

Oriya responds while leaning his head against my shoulder, "It was not your fault. Kazu always did reckless things in his life."

Turning around to face my lover, I mumble, "If I was stronger, then he would have not had to do what he did." He did it because I was weak. I am nothing but trouble for people around me.

Oriya holds me tighter as he replies, "But everyone was in the same state you were." He takes a deep breath before he speaks with sadness in his voice, "Kazu did something that he thought would be right. He did it . . . "

Looking up to see my lover has tears in his eyes, I wipe them away. Oriya loved and cared for Muraki. No one would notice how messed up he is inside. He's pride shows no one what he feels inside. I have only been the second person who saw it. He told me once that the only other person whom he showed his emotions to was Muraki. It must be hard for him right now. Hearing foot steps, I watch as Oriya wipes away his tears. We both look to see Tsuzuki standing there with his head down. I can still feel his pain but it is more revenge and hatred now. It is sad that he lost someone that he has been looking for all his life and afterlife.

Tsuzuki responds with concern in his voice, "Kira is going back."

Oriya speaks, "I guess she has things to do."

Tsuzuki looks up at him and asks, "Are you worried about her?"

Oriya gives a sad smile as he answers, "Yes, I'm worried, but she is too much like Kazu to even try to talk sense into her."

Mr. Keyis speaks up, "That is right. If I know Kira, then she will try everything in her power to make things right again."

Tsuzuki gives him a sad look as he replies in a cold voice, "Nothing can be the same."

I am ready to say something but Oriya touches my shoulder and shakes his head. It is hard for me to stand here to listen to Tsuzuki unemotion voice. Does anyone else hear it? It seems Mr. Keyis has heard the bitterness.

Mr. Keyis resorts, "You are right, but that is Kira. Kira is much like you, Mr. Tsuzuki. She showed you her true emotions, right? She only showed that to Muraki, himself, when he raised her for a while."

Watching Tsuzuki walk away with pain in his heart and revenge in his mind, I speak, "You should have not said that to him." Oriya looks at me confuse and I explain, "Tsuzuki is hurt. It is a deep pain of loss for losing Muraki, but there is also revenge. What Mr. Keyis just said to him is making him think about revenge even more."

Mr. Keyis responds, "He deserves his revenge. So does Kira. They both lost someone who is close to their hearts. Kira is cold and bitter. No one can get through her, but maybe Tsuzuki can."

Watching Mr. Keyis walk away, I ask my lover in a low voice, "Do you think it is okay to let him do this?"

Oriya answers, "I want revenge as well. I am sure if we work together then everyone will be fine."

The funeral will be the day after tomorrow and I will attend it. After that, I will head back and act like nothing has happened. How do they accept me to do that? Soka is the only one who refuses to believe I will be fine. I hate being so emotional around him. My emotions can drive him into insanity and I will never forgive myself for that. Kazutaka, oh, please come back. Lying in the bed we share for the short time we have been here, I smell his scent. Crying as I resort out loud to the empty room, "I miss you, Kazutaka." It has been like this all my life and afterlife with crying myself to sleep. Holding Kazutaka's pillow close to my chest, I whisper before sleep takes me over, "I love you, Kazutaka."

The night air is warm with the breeze blowing the leaves around me. It is a nice night to take a walk and clear my mind. It is hard to believe that this is where I want to be. It is confusing with him. Why do I keep going back to his arms? Is it for comfort? Maybe he is right about me leaving Tatsumi, but I don't have the guts to tell him that I don't love him anymore. How can I love him at first and then my love disappear for him in a flash? No, it is not that. I do love him but more of a friend than a lover. What should I do? Should I tell him that it is over? Should I even tell him that I have been going to someone else? Not seeing anything in front of me as I think, "What have you done to me?" Falling over as I run into someone, I reply, "Sorry."

His silk voice answers, "It is all right. Are you okay, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Looking up at his silver and blue eyes, I stutter, "Ye . . . s I'm . . . I'm fi . . . ne." He helps me to my feet and I think to myself, "Of course, I would run into the man I have been thinking about all night long." He tilts his head to the side and looks at me with concern in his eyes. I keep asking him how he can love a demon like me, but I receive the same answer. Are we really that alike, Muraki? Are we meant to be like this for the rest of our lives? It must be lonely for you. You had nothing and suffered in your child hood.

He asks with a tilt of fear in his voice, "Would you care to join me for dinner, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Nodding my head because I don't know if my voice would work right now. It has been a week since I saw Muraki. I think, "You must have been hurt to have you say those harsh things to me." Are you trying to say you are sorry? Why should you say that to a man who used you because I couldn't cope with my lover's anger? We walk to a small restaurant. A young male hostess smiles at you and I can feel anger rise in myself for the smile you return to him. Why do I feel this way for you, the man who should be my enemy? Can you even tell me that? We walk to the table and take our seats.

He breaks the silence, "What were you doing out so late, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Looking at the table, I reply, "Just thinking about some things."

He replies with concern in his voice, "I see. Is it anything I did?"

Raising my head to stare at him, I answer while shaking my head, "No. You had every right to say what you did a week ago." He gives me a sad smile and look before looking back down at the menu. I do the same and think, "I also need his advise, but why?" Putting down the menu, I ask, "May I ask you something, Muraki?"

Muraki looks up at me and replies, "You already asked me a question, but go ahead."

He gives me his full attendance and it makes it even harder to ask the question. Taking a couple of deep breaths to calm my nerves, I ask, "What do you see when you look at me?" He gives me a puzzle look, and I explain while I look away from his stare, "I mean do you see someone human or a demon with blood on their hands?"

He leans his chin on his hand and answers in a serious voice, "I see a human who had made mistakes in their life. I also see a man who had it hard as a child for the natural of his eyes that cause insanity to break through him." He pauses to take a breath before speaking again, "I see you, Asato Tsuzuki, a man who needs someone who understands him not only in a human sense but also in a demon sense."

Staring at him, I ask, "What do you mean?" Maybe I shouldn't ask that, but I need to know. He would know more about my blood than I do. No one will tell me the truth. I want to remember but at the same time don't want to. Could Muraki help me if I remembered everything?

He answers, "I am not trying to hurt you by saying anything that will upset you. Maybe another time, Mr. Tsuzuki."

Quickly, I respond, "No. I need to know now. Please, Muraki. I know it might hurt me, but I need to know."

He gives me a strange look before he answers, "Very well. You are half-demon, my dear Mr. Tsuzuki. Just like I am. Do not ask how that is possible. For even I do not understand that part, but we both share demon blood. It is our demon blood that drives us to insanity. I believe it is what caused you to lose your mind before you ended your life and for me I have no excuse. For I was driven by revenge and that alone."

He gives me a sad look that I want to comfort him as he has done for me, but there is a look in his eyes that tells me to not pity him. Is it pity I feel for Muraki? Watching the waiter walk over, I whisper, "Thank you." He only nods his head and looks at the waiter. I speak up, "I don't understand the language." Muraki chuckles and orders us both our meals which I'm grateful for. Asking him while I take the glass of wine to my lips, "What did you order for me?"

He answers with a gentle smile, "I ordered us both streaks with peas on the side. Is that okay with you, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

After taking a slip of the red wine, I mumble, "That's fine." Muraki is so different from before. The only person I have told about seeing Muraki was Soka. My cell phone rings and I look at the caller ID to see that Tatsumi is trying to reach me. Answering the phone, I mumble, "Hello, Siichiro."

He replies, "Hello, Asato. Where are you?"

Looking at Muraki to see sadness in his eyes, I answer in a cold voice, "Out." Muraki gives me a confused look. Shrugging my shoulders, I reply to my lover, "I needed some time alone. I'll talk to you later." Hanging up the phone before he could respond, I reply to Muraki, "Sorry about that."

He shakes his head and resorts, "You do not have to be. What is going on with you two?"

Staring at my cell phone in my hand as I whisper, "I don't know any more." He is so kind to me. Why is Muraki being so nice to me?

Waking up with sweat on my body, I mumble as warm tears roll down my face, "Why did I dream that? Oh, Kazutaka." Feeling the pain of loss again as I lie back down on the silk sheets with the pillow against my chest once again. It was such a beautiful dream too. It will never been the same. It looks like we were meant to be alone and never feel love. I think, "No that is not right. We loved each other and we felt it. So, why are we apart now?" Hearing a knock on the door, I mumble, "Come in." Soka walks in with sadness in his eyes. Guessing I woke him up with my emotions, I mumble, "Sorry, Soka." He walks to the bed and takes a seat on the edge of the bed. Mumbling while I hold the pillow closer to me, "Sorry."

He hugs me as he replies, "You have nothing to be sorry about, Tsuzuki. You are in pain now and I understand that. I wouldn't know what to do if Oriya died. I will always be here for you, Tsuzuki. Please remember that."

Wiping away my tears, I whisper to him as I see Oriya walk into the room, "Thank you, Soka." Looking over my shoulder to see Oriya leaning against the door frame, I reply, "Thank you for letting me stay."

He looks at me before speaking, "It is the least I can do for someone who helped Kazu."

Giving him a confuse look, I ask, "What did I do for him?"

Oriya shakes his head while stating, "Damn, you two are the same. You helped him become himself again." He smiles at me before speaking again, "And for that Tsuzuki, I will always be thankful for."

Not believing what I heard from Oriya. I helped Kazutaka become himself again. Smiling to myself while I think, "He told me that too, but that didn't stop him from dying."

Hisoka speaks up, "Stop thinking like that, Tsuzuki. It is not your fault."

Blinking at him a few times, I remember he can read my emotions. Mumbling while I sit up in bed, "Sorry." Soka shakes his head to tell me it is all right. Looking at Oriya, I ask, "Tomorrow will be the funeral?"

Oriya responds as he shakes his head, "No. It is today. I had to make sure everyone thought it was tomorrow. I don't need people asking questions. Katrina is the only one who knows something is up about you, guys, but she is trust worthy. So, you don't have to worry about her."

Standing up, I ask, "What time is it going to start?"

Oriya states, "It will be in two hours. It gives us all enough time to get ready. Mr. Tatsumi and Mr. Watari says that they will be there for you, but they had to head back." He takes a deep breath before speaking again, "I will also like you to come back here for awhile. So, I make sure you are all right. Muraki would kill me if I let anything happen to you."

Smiling at him, I reply, "Yeah, that sounds like him. I'll go get ready now."

Walking into the Chief's office, I resort, "Tsuzuki and Hisoka will not be in today, Chief."

He looks up at me and asks, "Why not?"

Do I tell him the truth and believe that he will not turn neither of them in? Tsuzuki's pain was to much for me to take and I could not stand there while watching him cry over another man, who loved him as much as I did. The chief is staring at me and waiting for me to give him an answer. Taking a seat in front of his desk, I respond, "They will be going to a funeral today, sir."

He gives me a surprise look and asks, "Who's?"

Looking down at my hands, I answer him with the truth, "Muraki's."

He replies, "What!?"

Staring at him, I give him a sad look as I reply, "If I tell you what is going on, will you turn them both in for something that they cannot help?" He shakes his head and I know I can trust Chief Konoe. Choosing my words careful, I explain, "Kurosaki has been seeing Oriya, Muraki's friend, and Tsuzuki has been seeing Muraki. I do not know how that relationship starting but Carton attacked." Taking a deep breath to tell the Chief all the details, I explain, "Muraki pushed Kurosaki out of the way to save his life but it cost his own life. Tsuzuki was pretty upset and requested to attend the funeral." Looking at the Chief, I wait for a respond.

He lets out a sigh and asks, "How are they doing?"

Responding while I stand up, "I do not know, sir. Tsuzuki was very upset and Kurosaki is trying to help out his lover and his partner." Turning around to look at Chief Konoe, I ask in a fearful voice, "Will you turn them in?" He shakes his head. I release a breath that I did not know I was holding in. Looking at the clock, I respond, "I must be going. I have something to do." He nods to me and I leave the office to find Terazuma and Wakaba looking at me with concern in their eyes. I can understand Wakaba with that look, but Terazuma that is surprising. I ask, "What is it?"

Terazuma, "Where is slacker?"

Smiling at him while I state, "He and Kurosaki have the day off. When they return, please do me a favor, Terazuma." He gives me a dirty look.

Wakaba answers for him, "Anything, Tatsumi. What can we do?"

Answering her while I push my glasses up, "Please be kind to Tsuzuki. He is depressed right now and will need his friends with him more than ever."

Kira speaks up as she walks in, "He needs someone else but you would not understand that, Mr. Tatsumi."

Giving her a sad smile, I reply, "I might not understand, but I know that is what he wishes for. For Tsuzuki I will do everything in my power to give him back the person he loves no matter what I think of the person."

She gives me a smile and replies, "They will not bring him back. They will not give him a chance to be immortal even if his demon blood gives him strong powers."

Tilting my head to the side, I ask, "What do you mean by that, Miss Kira?"

She answers, "He is half-demon, Mr. Tatsumi. The same as Asato Tsuzuki." She bows her head to us all as she resorts, "I must be going. I will see you all soon. I am sure of that."

We watch her walk out and I reply, "Do not repeat a word to anyone, you two." They both nods their heads. I know Terazuma will not say anything to anyone. Even if he acts like he does not care about Tsuzuki, he does. Walking away, I reply, "Get back to work, you two or I will dock your pay." Walking out of the building and heading over to the building that will hold an answer that I need. If I do not ask, then I will never forgive myself for not even trying to help Tsuzuki through his pain. The building stands tall and I walk inside to see a young woman in her twenties sitting behind a large oak desk filling out paper work. Clearing my throat to get her attendance, I reply, "Excuse me, Miss."

She looks up and gives me a sweet smile as she replies, "Hello, Mr. Tatsumi. It is nice to see you again. What can I do for you today?"

It is not everyday that I request to see the Lord. Maybe I should come back later. No, that will not work. I need to do this now. Looking at her, I ask, "May I see the Lord?"

She gives me a surprise look and answers, "I am not sure about that, Mr. Tatsumi, but I will check for you."

A young girl's voice rings out, "He will not be seeing Lord Emna. That pleasure will be mine alone."

Turning around to face the new comer, I think, "That voice sounds formerly." She has on a dark pair of jeans with a black belly shirt on that fits her frame. It is her eyes that startles me. They are purple. Who is this girl? I ask, "Who are you?"

She answers while giving me a cold glare that send chills down my spine, "My name is Ketessa."

The girl behind the desk gives a fearful look at Ketessa as she resorts, "Lord Emna is through those doors."

She points to the door and I watch as Ketessa walks through the doors to the man I wish to see. I ask, "Is everything all right?"

She answers with a fearful voice, "I am not sure. I just sensed great power in her and she was very upset about something."

We all arrive at the burial site. I lost my control in the car and Soka had to comfort me. Wishing that Kazutaka was the one comforting me, but I did not say that to Soka. Looking at the grave that my love will be bury in soon, I notice the priest is there. Whispering to my love, as I put my hand on the castanet, "I will always love you. I wish you will still here." Tears roll down my face as Soka hugs me, I stutter, "I... I... don...'t un..ders...tand." It is too hard for me to believe he is gone forever. I will never see his gentle smile he gave me when I needed someone to understand the pain that I was going through. Everyone around me knows that I had a troubled past, but they don't understand the pain behind it. They will never be able to comforted me as Kazutaka did. Kneeling down beside the grave that will mark the end of my lover's life and mine as well, I whisper, "My love. Oh, Kazutaka, I hope you understand and know how much you meant to me."

Oriya walks to us and replies, "He knows, Tsuzuki. You gave him something that no one could give him as he did for you."

Standing up, I mumble in a bitter voice, "What was that?"

He answers while staring at the dark clouded sky, "Understanding. You understood his pain that not even I could understood."

It is the first time that I have saw Oriya have tears in his eyes for the loss of Kazutaka. Now, I understand that Oriya is going through the same emotions as I am. He knows how it feels to lose the one you love, but his love is different than mine own.

Oriya states, "The funeral will not be long. The priest will say a few words and that will be all. I don't want to stay here listening to someone who will never understand Kazu."

Nodding my head in agreement, I respond, "I believe Kazutaka would have agreed with you." He only smiles at me and Soka stands by his side. That is where Soka belongs right now. He has to help his lover through this pain.

The priest walks to us and states, "I will keep this short as Mr. Oriya requested." He takes a deep breath and speaks up, "May the soul of Kazutaka Muraki rest in peace and may his love ones be able to move on with his blessings as he watches from the skies above."

Watching the priest walk away with a surprise look on his face towards Oriya, I whisper low enough for me to hear, "Watch over us, Kazutaka. Please, help me." Falling to my knees as I sob and let my tears run freely down my face, I whisper, "I can't live without you, Kazutaka." I can't promise you that because I don't know how to live without you. Oh, please, come back to me. It starts to pour down rain and I think, "It is raining. That makes it even more sad. You hated the rain." Now, I will hate the rain for as long as I continue to live.

Oriya walks to me with Hisoka and puts his hand on my shoulder as he speaks, "It is time for us to head back. We can give you a few minutes alone."

They walk away from me to give me some time. The time means nothing to me any more. If it is not with him, then I don't want it. I want to be with him, in his arms, and away from this cruel life. This cannot be happening. The pain is to flesh and to real for me to deal with. What do I do now? How do I move on? Staring at the castanet, I whisper, "I love you, my dear Kazutaka." Standing up, I respond as I walk away, "Maybe someday I can say good-bye to you, but right now I can't bring myself to say it. You will have to forgive me, my love." I walk to Oriya and Soka while they stare at me with concern and sadness in their eyes. It will be soon that Soka and I have to returned to work. Tatsumi would have told Chief Konoe what happened and he will know the whole truth. I don't care if they take my life, but they will not do anything to Hisoka. That I will make sure of. Tatsumi had no choice to say what has been happening. I will give up everything because there is no point of living. Our ride back to KoKakuRo was silent and I did nothing but stare out the window. It wasn't like I could see anything new.

Oriya offers, "Please stay the night, Tsuzuki. I am sure your friends told them that you will not been in today."

Giving him a grateful look, I respond in a broken voice, "Thank you." Walking to the room that I shared with Kazutaka that night before his death, I whisper to myself, "It will be soon that nothing will matter. I will have my revenge and then I will join you. No matter where you are, Kazutaka, I will join you." It means nothing to me any more. The pain is to great to bare and the dreams of the times we had are haunting my being. It is those dreams that I wish to get lost into, but I wake up from them and remember that Kazutaka is not lying next to me. What will happen when I start to have nightmares once again? No one will be there to wake me up to stop the demons within my soul from destroying my being. What happens if I become what I hate the most? Who will be safe from me? Lying down on the bed with my eyes staring at the ceiling, I hear the whispers of a man who is dead. My eyes close to get lost into my dreams once again.

It is raining out side with thunder shaking the ground. Looking over at Muraki to see him reading a book to keep his mind off the rain, I ask, "What are you reading, Muraki?"

He looks up and shrugs his shoulders as he answers, "To be honest, Mr. Tsuzuki, I have not been reading any of it."

Taking a seat on the white couch, I ask while tilting my head to stare at Muraki without him really noticing, "What have you been doing then?"

He responds with a grin, "Checking out your ass."

Feeling the heat raise to my cheeks, he chuckles at me and I resort, "Stop teasing me." He only chuckles more and that is when I first realize that is the first time I heard him laugh. Turning to look at the fire place, I ask, "What were you really doing?"

He replies with sadness in his voice, "Thinking about the past as I always do when it rains, Mr. Tsuzuki."

Mumbling as I rub my hands together, "Sorry for bringing it up." He takes a seat next to me and holds me. It feels nice to have his warmth next to me. Why does he make me feel wonderful when my own lover can't do that? Turning to face him, I mumble into his chest, "Why is it you?"

He asks, "What do you mean by that, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Answering him while I lean up to look him in the eyes, "Why is it you that I found comfort when I can't do that with Tatsumi?" He gives me a sad look and I can tell he is thinking of a way to respond to my question. He is about to pull his arms away from me and I grab his arms as I resort, "Please hold me."

He replies, "I will do anything for you, my dear guardian of death. Even if that means that I will be left out in the cold."

Staring at him, I ask, "Do you love me that much, Muraki?" Always asking him that question and receiving the same yes to the question. Why does Muraki love me when I might never return those feelings? Why does he make me so confuse when I'm with him? Why can I tell him everything but can't say anything to Tatsumi? These questions are racing through my mind and it is driving me insane.

He answers with a gentle smile, "I love you that much and more. You have no idea how much I love you, Asato. You brought something back to me that I thought I lost a long time ago."

Tilting my head to the side, I ask in a soft voice, "What is that, Muraki?"

He answers while kissing my forehead, "You brought my true self back. It is hard to explain."

Responding to him while I lean into his warm body, "I guess I can understand. In a way you help me with my problems and ask for nothing in return. I can't ever begin to repay you for everything you have done for these past couple of weeks."

He whispers in my ear, "I need nothing in return, my dear Asato. As long as you are happy then I will be all right with that."

Wrapping my arms around his waist, I respond, "But you are lying. You won't be all right if I can never return your feelings. You may not believe this but I know what it feels like to love and never have it returned." His hold on me tightens and I understand that he wishes not to discuss this any longer. Looking at the clock, I notice it is one in the morning and don't care to return to my home. Whispering as I look up at Muraki, "Can I stay here for the night? I don't want to go home." My tears are ready to fall from my eyes and I hope he will not be upset with me for not telling him that Tatsumi and I had a huge fight this afternoon.

He answers, "Of course. I know you do not wish to discuss what happened between you and Mr. Tatsumi, but I wish you would."

Lying my head on his lap, I explain, "Well, he thought that I was cheating on him with Hisoka again because I was out late with Hisoka. I tried to tell him that I went with Hisoka to Oriya's and he didn't believe me." Taking a deep breath to hold back my sobs, I continue speaking in a sad voice, "Then I told him that I will not stop talking to my best friend because we had an affair that was his fault in the first place. I really messed up this time."

Muraki runs his hand through my hair as he resorts, "No, you did nothing wrong. You were upset about what he was saying and you said things that you did not mean. I am sure if you say you are sorry he will forgive you."

Wiping my tears from my eyes, I whisper, "But I'm not sorry for saying it. He said worse things to me." I know I am acting like a child getting caught in the middle of an act and is whining about being found out, but I don't care. Muraki has never judged me and he won't start now.

He chuckles as he replies, "Then do not say anything to him for awhile. I bet you that if you stop talking to him for awhile, he will say he is sorry for the things he said to you."

Looking up at him with a grin on my face, I ask, "Do you think that will work, Muraki?" He gives me a gentle smile and nods his head. Staring at the fire, I ask, "Is it all right to be like this?"

He looks at me confuse and asks, "What is?"

Closing my eyes, I answer, "Being like this." Taking a deep breath before explaining what I have been thinking about for the past week, "I been thinking about ending it with Tatsumi. I mean I still feel for him, but it is not enough. Besides, I think I love him as a friend. I just don't know any more. Since meeting you at that bar, I have been thinking a lot about ending it with Tatsumi. I know it was the end a long time ago." Catching my breath as I try to stop the sob that is ready to break, I resort, "It's just I don't want to be alone any more, but Tatsumi can't understand that or doesn't fill that need in me."

Muraki resorts in a warm voice, "I want to ask you something, but you have to promise that you will not be upset with me and disappear after I ask it."

Opening my eyes to look at Muraki, I answer, "I promise."

He leans his head back while closing his eyes as he asks, "Do I fill that need in you, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

It doesn't make me upset by him asking the question, but I'm upset with myself because I don't know the answer. Does he fill that need in me? He runs his hand through my blown hair to make sure I am not trying to leave him alone. Watching his chest raise and fall, I reply, "I'm not sure. I mean you do make me feel comfortable and not alone. I just don't know what to say."

He opens his eyes to look at me and smiles while stating, "Maybe I will ask that question another time then."

Sitting up in the bed, I begin to cry because he never had the chance to ask that question to me again. The answer is yes. It will always be yes. Why does it have to end like this? When I finally found someone who understands me and fills the need in me, they leave me behind.

Walking into the dark room with little light from the candles, I whisper, "I know you are here." Sensing his presence in front of myself, I stand before him without fearing the great Lord Emna. I have no choice, but to be here. The pain I can feel is so great. It is his dreams that drive him into insanity.

Lord Emna speaks, "Yes, I am here. I see you come to me in your true form with the name of the ancient demon, Ketessa."

Tilting my head to the side with amusement in my voice, I respond, "That is the name they gave me so long ago. Now, let's get down to business, Lord Emna." If it was anyone else to show such disrespect to him, they would not be standing any longer, but I am different.

He resorts, "Of course. Why have you come?"

Snapping my fingers to make a chair appear behind me, I take a seat in it as I begin to speak, "Carton killed someone that I wish you to bring into your fold. I am sure he will agree for he has someone he loves."

Lord Emna explains, "I cannot do that and you know it."

Smiling even though he cannot see it, I reply, "But you can. He would make a great asset to you, Lord Emna. For he is the one who can calm Asato's power and he is the one who holds that man's heart."

Lord Emna asks, "Who would that be?"

Leaning back against the chair, I answer in a cold tone, "Kazutaka Muraki. He is much like Asato in many ways. He will accept your offer."

Lord Emna mumbles, "I would guess he would. What do I get in return for giving him back his life, Miss Ketessa."

Answering while I stand up with a cold dark voice, "You will not have me end this place. They dare attack what holds my heart and expect me to back off. You of all people know that I have no problem ending this place. I do not like this world and I have the power to end it."

He resorts, "I know what you can do. Answer me this first, then I will have to think about my response to your request."

Looking around at the candles that barely light up the room, I reply, "Go right ahead."

He asks in a low tone, "Do you do this because you need his powers as well or does this have to do with Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Now, that is a question I have to think about. Is it for his powers that I need to carry out my revenge or is it because of Asato? Knowing the answer in my heart and my mind, I respond, "Both."

He gives me a puzzle look as he asks, "Why both?"

The million questions. Should have took a rain check on the meeting? I explain, "I do need Kazutaka's powers to carry out my revenge but I cannot stand Asato's pain. He really loves Kazutaka." Looking away from him, I mumble, "Please bring Kazutaka Muraki back and let Asato Tsuzuki have some kind of life."

Lord Emna answers with sadness in his voice, "I will do what I can. If Kazutaka Muraki wishes to return, then I will grant it."

Turning to leave the dark room, I reply in a cold voice, "Carton is mine to kill, Lord Emna. He will pay for bringing pain to Asato's heart. He will pay for bringing that pain and sadness to my father's eyes and heart." Walking out as I think, "Now you know who Asato Tsuzuki is to me. He is my father, Lord Emna. Keep that in mind before you also try to use him against me."