Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / X/1999 Fan Fiction / Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Then came an angel ❯ Random Crazy Comedy Insert; #1 ( Chapter 10 )

Chapter 10

By: Sapadu

 

*Random static noises*

We apologize. Today's chapter of the fanfic "Then Came an Angel" is having technical difficulties and writers block. Instead, we bring to you a special segment that was discussed over GJ and e-mail between Sapadu and Megami-chan and written and edited by Sapadu.

Now, without further ado, we bring to you:

The Sakurazukamori with the Golden Gun: The Musical!

 

Performers:

Dead!Shinigami-esque!Hokuto-chan

Shinigami!Crazy!Blond-type-stupid!Sapadu-chan

 

On stage-ers:

Confused!Horrified!Subaru-kun

PissedOff!Murderous!Seishirou-san

Snide!Smart-ass!Tree-san

Cameo!Ken-chan

 

Setting:

The Local Grocery Store

 

(Music begins. Samantha and Hokuto are dancing in the aisles of the grocery store. Seishirou-san is watching them. Subaru-kun is watching, looking confused that Hokuto is 'back', horrified that they're singing so loud (Hence Confused!Horrified!Subaru-kun) and is praying to God that Seishirou-san will not kill them where they stand)

 

Sapadu: (Holding her hands like a gun) He has a powerful wea-PON...

Hokuto: (Doing the same, but crouching behind Sapadu and jerking her arms like she's fired the gun) He charges a million a-a... SHOT!

Sapadu: (Flashing the "I'm # 1" sign) An assassin, that's second to NONE!

Both: (Back to back holding Gun!Hands up) The Man with the Gold-en GU-UN!

Subaru: *blinks*

Seishirou: *frowns- he knows where this is going*

Hokuto: (Crouching and peering around the corner from one aisle to another) Lurking in some... DARK-ened door-way...

Sapadu: (Kneeling on the top of the shelf) Or crouched on a rooftop, some-WHERE...

Hokuto: (Edging along the shelfs on tiptoe) In the next room, or THIS VERY ONE!

Both: (Sapadu jumping off the shelf and striking a mirror pose as Hokuto along the next shelf) The Man with the Gold-en GU-UN!

Seishirou: *glares them to death*

Subaru: *frowning, now*

Sapadu: (Hands over her heart, swaying at the hips) Love is re-QUIR-RED, when-ever he's HIR-RED!

Hokuto: (Popping out from behind Sapadu and firing off to the side) It comes just before... the KI-ILL!

Sapadu: (Grinning over her shoulder at Hokuto) No one can CATCH 'IM!

Hokuto: (Back to back with Sapadu, grinning) No hit man can MATCH 'IM!

Both: (Shaking their butts) For his million dollar SK-I-I-ILL!

Subaru: (Thinking) Why is my sister doing THAT?! I thought she was straight!

Hokuto: (Doing her firing Gun!Hand thing again) One gold-en SHOT means another PO-OR vict-im...(Back of her hand against her forehead-le sigh)

Sapadu: (Shaking her butt, bringing her arms down from over head to by her sides, her fingers wiggling) Has come to a glit-ter-in' E-EN-ND!

Hokuto: (Hands in fists, in front of her chest, her shoulders going up and down) For a price, he'll e-RASE, any-one!

Both: (Back to back again) The Man with the Gold-en GU-UN!

Tree-san: *laughing it's ass off*

Seishirou: (Holding an axe) Shut up, Tree!

(Music slows, lights grow dim)

Sapadu: (Stroking an imaginary goatee beard) His e-ye... may-be-e-e... on YOU... or me-e...

Hokuto: (Her hand against her chin, also looking contemplative) Who will he ba-an-ng?

Tree-san: *cough*Sumeragi*cough*

Seishirou: I said, SHUT UP, Tree!

Both: (Flailing their arms) We-e-e sha-all SE-E-E-E! Oh, YE-EA-AH!

(Lights come back, music speeds up again)

Subaru: (Eyebrows going up) WHAT did the Tree say?

Hokuto: (Hands over her heart, swaying her hips) Lo-ove is re-QUIR-RED, when-ever he's HIR-RED!

Sapadu: (Popping out from behind Hokuto and firing to the side) It comes just be-fore... the... KI-ILL!

Hokuto: (Grinning over her shoulder to Sapadu) No one can CATCH 'IM!

Sapadu: (Back to back with Hokuto, grinning) No hit man can MATCH 'IM!

Both: (Shaking their butts) For his million dollar SKI-I-ILL!

Seishirou: (Thinking) Who the hell is their choreographer?

Tree-san: *smacks him*

Seishirou: Oh...

Sapadu: (Doing Hokuto's firing Gun!Hand thing) One gold-en SHOT means another PO-OR vict-im...

Hokuto: (Shaking her butt, bringing her hands down from over her head to by her sides, her fingers wiggling) Has come to a glit-ter-in' EN-ND!

Sapadu: (Doing the Vegas Dancers side-kick thing) If-you-want-to-get-RID-of-SOME-ONE...

Both: (Back to back again) The Man with the Gold-en GU-UN...

Sapadu: (Flailing arms) WI-ILL GE-ET-IT DONE!

Both: (Doing a funky duck walk thing)

Hokuto: (Going to her Charlies' Angel's pose) HE-E'LL SHO-O-OT ANYONE!

Both: (Funky duck walk thing, again) WITH HIS GO-O-OLD-EN GU-U-UN!

Seishirou: *ki-i-i-i-ill...*

Hokuto: We-ell... Sei-chan, waddya think? *bouncy, bouncy*

Seishirou: Give me... one VERY good reason... not to throttle the both of you...

Sapadu: (Waving her hand like Shigure or Ayame) How rude! To dare threaten ladies like that!

Hokuto: *indignant* Yes, indeed! Shameful behavior!

Sapadu: I mean, it's not like we were mentioning any NAMES or stuff like that...

Hokuto: (Muttering) Though, Tree-san had a good point when it came the the part about 'bang'ing and it muttered 'Sumeragi'...

Sapadu: (Nodding) I always knew Tree-san was smart...

Tree-san: *beams*

Subaru: *blush* H-HOKUTO-CHAN!

Sapadu: (Patting Seishirou on the head) See, Sei-chan? You should be GRATEFUL! We made Subaru-kun blush and stammer like in the old days!

Seishirou: (Eyebrows go up) Hmm... You're RIGHT! Thank you so much, Sapadu-san, Hokuto-chan... (Turns to Subaru) *happy grin happy* Subaru-kun, do you find me sexy?

Subaru: *blush* S-Seishirou-san... *glare* (Thinking) Not fair...

Sapadu: (Again stroking the imaginary goatee) Though we DO have some work to do on that deep, unabiding hatred he has of you...

Hokuto: (Nodding, wisely) Some people hold grudges over the littlest things- killing one's sister, breaking one's heart, lying about how they mean nothing...

Ken: Let ME worry about Sumeragi-san's mental problems.

Tree-san: And I'LL take care of setting them up for their first date!

Sapadu: Ack! But Ken, you haven't even met Subaru yet in the fic! And shut up! You're spoiling the story for the readers.

Ken: *blinks* (Covers mouth with hand) ...Oops...

Sapadu: Well... shit...

 

A/N: Yeah... I was bored, and I couldn't beat an actual chapter out of me if my life depended on it. In the original brainstorm, Kendalina is also singing, and Triclops, Ken, and Skywalker are also watching, all three of them hiding their faces in their hands or wailing 'Why, God; WHY?!'

Doesn't Ken-chan remind anyone of Subaru in Tokyo Babylon here? Which is kinda funny, given how Ken and Subaru meet in the fic.