Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Bite-Sized ❯ The Downward Spiral ( Chapter 2 )
Xpyne: I can't believe Solitaire published this without telling me!
Solitaire: ::shrugs:: Hey, that's what happens when you fall asleep before me.
Xpyne: Do you ever sleep?
Solitaire: Not if I can help it. ^_^
Xpyne: ::sighs:: Anyway, we thought you'd all like to hear how we came up with the idea for this one.
Solitaire: I was sitting there, doing--I don't know what--and Xpyne was eating leftover Easter candy, and I hear her say, "This is supposed to satisfy me??" I looked over and she was looking derisively down at a bite-sized Twix (which is about an inch and a half long). I looked at her, then I looked at the Twix, and I started snickering. Somehow, she knew right away what I was laughing at.
Yugi: I don't like the insinuation here...
Xpyne: Me neither, but it is pretty hilarious. We don't own Yugioh or Bonnie Bell cheese, or just about anything.
Solitaire: Enjoy!
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Bite-Sized
by Solitaire and Xpyne
Chapter 2
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Yami smacked Joey with one of the throw pillows from the couch. "Take it back!" he shouted.
"No!" After a brief struggle, the blonde managed to pry the pillow from Yami. "Duo is hotter than Heero." He made a feint at the former pharaoh with the pillow and Yami lunged at him, knocking him onto his back on the cushions and straining to reach the pillow Joey was holding over his head.
"Liar!"
Bizarre argument number 15 of the day was abruptly interrupted when Yugi came stomping through the room and ran straight for the bathroom, the door slamming and locking behind him. The pair on the couch stared after him bewilderedly. There was the sound of running water as the shower was turned on. After a moment there was a yelp, then all was silent but for the water.
Yami and Joey exchanged a wide-eyed look.
"Did he just--?" He let the question hang. Yami burst into immature snickers.
"I think so." Evil smile on face, the petite boy let his crimson eyes slide out of focus. He gave his lighter half a tentative mental poke.
\\ ...Yugi? \\
\ Argh!! \ Yami jumped as Yugi rudely shut him out. When their snickers finally subsided, Yami crawled into his koi's lap, worried expression on his face.
"There's only one explanation for this: he and Kaiba had a fight."
"Oh, yeah, that makes sense..." The blonde scratched the back of his head and frowned. "If that jerk Kaiba has done somethin'--he's gonna have ta deal wit me." At that moment, Yugi came down the stairs and went into the kitchen.
"Aibou?"
"Yuug?"
There was nothing but silence for a long moment until---
"Uhh, I can't believe him!" Yugi came storming out of the kitchen, Bonnie Bell cheese clenched in one little hand. "He's such a-a--self-serving, uncompromising, macho-obsessive, insulting, super-controlling egomaniac!" He was pacing back and forth as he ranted, squeezing the life out of his little wheel of wax covered cheese. "He acts like he's the only one with a dick!"
Finally, it was too much and Joey burst out laughing. Yugi froze mid-pace and whirled on his best friend.
"Oh, you, too, ne?" he accused.
"Calm down, aibou, and tell us what happened so we can start planning our slow and torturous murder of a certain CEO." The dark one grinned at the prospect of getting to play a penalty game with Kaiba.
"I'm sorry, Yuug. Want me to beat Kaiba up for ya?" The blonde pounded one fist into his palm for emphasis. Yugi plopped down into an armchair with a sigh, his uncharacteristic anger spent.
"No," he pouted, crossing his arms over his chest. He fiddled with a blonde bang, still damp from his cold shower. Yami and Joey waited patiently. "He won't let me be seme."
Joey bit his fist to stop anything that might come out of his mouth, not trusting himself not to put his foot in it. Yami gave him a preemptive glare before speaking.
"Are you serious? He flat-out refused you?" Yugi blushed and nodded, not looking at the pair on the couch, busying himself in carefully removing the red wax covering from his squished cheese.
"What a--everythin' you just said! So what, you just left?" Yugi nibbled on his cheese, rolling the wax in his free hand.
"Yeah...he--he called me bite-sized!" Yami and Joey both began coughing. Yugi looked up to glare at them. "Thanks, guys. I guess I should just go back to Kaiba now," he said sarcastically.
"He's stubborn. Ra, he's stubborn. So I only see one option."
"What?" Yugi asked doubtfully, his hand going unconsciously to the shoulder where his koibito had bitten him.
"Bind and dominate him."
"What!?!" Yugi's jaw dropped. A little piece of cheese fell out of his mouth.
"Oh, that'd be great! I'd love to see moneybags chained up like a--" Joey's eyes glazed over as he indulged in his own personal fantasy. Yami and Yugi exchanged an "O-kaaaay" look.
"I can't chain Kaiba-kun! What if he gets mad? And besides, he'd such a light sleeper; he's got some sort of freaky cat-like awareness or something. And where would I get chains? It's wouldn't work."
"Well, seduce him. He won't be mad if he's horny." Yugi face-vaulted.
"You don't know Kaiba-kun at all! He's mad half the time because he's horny!"
"Hmm, that'd explain why he got a lot nicer after hookin' it up with you," Joey mused.
"Jounouchi!" Yugi had the audacity to look insulted by the mostly true statement.
"Okay, okay," Yami interrupted, elbowing the blonde in the ribs with a smirk, "back to the subject at hand: figuring out a way Yugi can get Kaiba flat on his back like a whore."
"Ya-mi!!"
The spirit smiled guilelessly and completely ignored Yugi's mortification. "Now--I suggest defeating him in a duel and demanding his body as your prize." He looked to Joey for approval. Yugi plucked at the hem of his shirt.
"I don't want Kaiba-kun to associate me being seme with him losing at Duel Monsters." Joey nodded.
"Yeah, I'm gonna hafta say chains is your best bet." He grinned widely. "I'll call Bakura."
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Kaiba had been rapidly progressing the downward spiral; Joey had been watching this for the past week with a sort of malicious glee. The next day at school after his and Yami's...enlightening conversation with Yugi, he noticed the blue-eyed CEO did not look happy. But Kaiba was never in a good mood at school--except for those times when he and Yugi always disappeared mysteriously during lunch to come back in for 5th period with Kaiba looking his usual immaculate self, while Yugi always appeared suspiciously disarrayed. So the blonde thought nothing of it.
The day after that, Kaiba seemed to have a shorter fuse than usual. He glared at their regular group of friends, snapped at the cheerleaders in history class to "shut the hell up," and bitched out the teacher for the incorrect marking of his test which had resulted in the lose of one point. At lunchtime, Yugi had allowed the billionaire to pull him into his lap, but had calmly pushed away the wandering hands whenever they reached for a leg or the hem of his shirt. Needless to say, Kaiba did not like being denied.
On day three, the brunette looked likely to rip the head off anyone who came within five feet of him. It would have been a crime to pass up an opportunity like that, and Joey had casually asked Yami (within Kaiba's hearing) if he was alright---"You know, `cause I hope I didn't hurt you, last night, in bed." If looks could kill, Joey would have been dead three times over, and he decided there were definitely perks to the immunity bestowed upon one by being the best friend of the boyfriend of the guy who hates your guts. Later that evening, Joey had heard from Yugi, who had heard from Mokuba, that Kaiba had fired four employees, including his secretary, when he came into work.
By Friday, Kaiba had developed an eye twitch and was pretending to ignore Yugi completely. In actuality, whenever the smaller boy wasn't looking, he would watch him with what Joey had affectionately dubbed the 'I'm gonna throw you down onto a desk and fuck your brains out in front of the whole class' stare. At lunch the blonde had made it a point to be kissing and inappropriately groping Yami when Kaiba walked up. Yami had enthusiastically agreed, but whether this was because it was part of the plan, or because Yami just liked being inappropriately groped, Yugi wasn't sure.
As it was, Yugi hadn't been idle that week once school hours were over, either. Each day, Kaiba would call him almost as soon as he'd gotten home from and invite him over to the mansion. Yugi would always have a convenient excuse, usually something about homework or helping his grandfather in the shop. He felt guilty, having to talk to the brunette for at least fifteen minutes to assuage his insecurities and assure him that no, he wasn't breaking up with him, yes, he still loved him very much and no, he hadn't joined some freaky 'celibacy cult.' In reality, Yugi was spending his evenings (in addition to homework and helping Grandpa) taking "lessons" from Yami and Joey. While he found the situation a bit disturbing, his desire to make Kaiba's first time as uke as enjoyable as possible outweighed his embarrassment.
Yugi's lessons included such things as "How to trick your partner into doing whatever you want before he even realizes you have ulterior motives" (a lesson that had Joey going, "Hey!" about every five seconds as Yami talked) and "How to make your control-freak boyfriend want to take it up the ass." After that one, Joey had been banned from naming lessons.
Thursday's session had been Yami's, to Yugi and Joey's complete embarrassment, "Helpful experienced person's tips for good driving" lesson. Yugi had actually started to get interested when Joey declared if the lesson didn't stop right then he'd never talk to either of them again.
"So what do I do if he gets really mad?" Yugi asked of the other two conspirators, finally voicing his worst fear.
"Eh, run and hide and remind him yer best friends with his boy--oh yeah, that only works for me...hmm." Joey scratched the back of his head. Yami pulled Yugi into a hug.
"He won't." Yugi looked up at him doubtfully.
"You don't know Kaiba-kun like I do. He gets really mad when waiters put dressing on his salad for him!" He continued informatively, "He likes it put on in a counter-clockwise spiral, avoiding the croutons 'cause dressing makes them soggy." He twirled his finger demonstratively. Yami cracked up.
"Well, okay he will get mad, but he won't stay mad-- for just that reason. No one knows him like you do, and he certainly doesn't love anyone the way he loves you. He's just a--"
"Arrogant, self-centered bastard," Joey supplied, cutting in.
"--yes, thank you, Joey, who will get over his pride as soon as you start screwing him into the next level of the afterlife," he finished. Yugi blushed.
"Uh, thanks Yami. And he's not a bastard, Joey!" The blonde only grinned, as if to say, "Yeah, right." Yugi gave Yami's waist a squeeze before pulling back. "So I guess the plan goes into motion tomorrow. I already called Mokuba and asked him to spend the night at a friend's. Did you get the fuzzy handcuffs? I don't want Kaiba-kun's wrists hurt."
"Yep. And Bakura says he doesn't want to know."
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Xpyne: So what'd ya`ll think? Be sure to review.
Solitaire: ::is drooling at the mental image of Kaiba chained to a bed:: Next chapter is limey/lemony fresh! Oh, and just out of curiosity, does anyone want to see a lemon between Yami and Joey? `Casue I've never ever seen one of those...
Xpyne: Ooh! I could do that!
Solitaire: There you go--she volunteered. So if you want to see some YamixJoey action (yes, Yami's the boy in the relationship), be sure to say so in your review! ^_~