Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Freak of Nature Documentary ❯ In Hot Water ( Chapter 4 )

Joey approached the mansion, complaining to himself quietly about the sheer size of the residence. "Sheesh, it's gonna take FOREVER to just _find_ those guys in there..." He started off along the wall, and peered into the windows as he went, trying to locate a bedroom. Eh, might as well get started while he looked....

"Hey, this is Joey Wheeler, and I'm on a search to study Seto Kaiba. I guess this video'll answer the couple really BIG questions we've got about this guy, which I'll tell you about before we start." He grinned. "Question one: What is UP with that trenchcoat thing?! Personally, I think he's got a fetish for them or something. Or maybe he thinks he looks chic in it. The style really did leave a while back, but.... yeah, just let him dream, huh? More importantly, HOW does the bottom DO that flipping thing? It's outrageous! He probably sewed some wire in it, or maybe put weights in other parts so that it's the

lightest, and has to do it. Or do you think it could have a mind of it's own? Hey, have you ever seen that movie Exorcist? I've heard of possessed people before, and jewelry, too, but _trenchcoats_?! Geez!"

"Okay, and the next question: Do you think he's really a guy? I mean, with the way Kaiba acts, you might think he's an android or something.... But then again, he HAS got a brother.... Mokuba's pretty nice, you know? So that means that they're either not real brothers, or maybe that Kaiba's only _partially_ a robot.... You know, I think he's a cyborg or something. That'd definitely make sense. If he is one, do you think he did it himself? Or maybe someone else decided to experiment on him or something..... I've never seen any implants, though. Maybe they're always covered up by clothing. Or under his hair? ....What if he wears a wig, and the things are in his scalp? That would be SO creepy...." Joey shuddered, having managed to mildly freak himself out with letting his

musings ramble a bit too much.

"O-kay, moving right along...." He trotted along, sneakers squeaking a little on the fresh early morning dew. "A-ha!" A window looking into a bedroom afforded him the sight of Seto turning off the alarm clock and heading into the bathroom, clad only in a pair of silky black boxers, with a card-shaped locket dangling from around his neck. No, Seto did NOT wear Blue Eyes White Dragon boxers.... at least, not usually. He might consider it for casual wear, though. Joey turned away, disgusted. "Ugh! Too high and mighty to wear pajamas there, Kaiba?"

Pouting, he looked into the room, deciding to continue. "Okay, and this is where Kaiba lives." He paused a moment. "....How can he STAND it in there? It's so....so.... _neat_....!" Joey shuddered again. "There isn't a comic book or candy wrapper in sight! It's obvious he's deranged or something. I mean, NOBODY can live like this for long without going insane. You just CAN'T keep a place so.... UNmessy for this period of time without it having some sort of warping affect on your mind. I'll bet the guy's a neat freak or something. Poor Mokuba! I wonder if HE has to keep his room this neat, too? Hopefully he wasn't corrupted with this awful clean lifestyle. It can probably be remedied if he has, anyhow. He's young enough to be straightened out." Joey quite avidly extolled the virtues of living messily. Cleaning up after yourself to THAT degree was just.... WRONG. Really, now...."Sure is a big place, though. And he gets it all to himself, too! ...Well, _almost_ all to himself. But Mokuba's younger than he is, so it's all cool, right? I'll bet it's awesome to have free reign like that. I wonder what they do with all that free space?" In actuality, most of the space they didn't use at all, though Joey didn't know that. His mind was easily able to conjure up fantastic possibilities to fill that lack of knowledge, and all of them were much more interesting than any simple, mundane reason would be. But that didn't really matter, did it? Not to him, anyhow.

He proceeded along the wall of the house, not having to go too far before coming to the hall between the brothers' rooms, just in time to intercept the morning greeting. Seto, freshly showered and fully dressed, knelt down to accommodate Mokuba's flying hug, leaning back a little so as not to be tackled to the ground. "Morning!"

"Good morning." The older boy's arms circled around his little brother, enfolding him in a warm embrace. With a small stretch, he rose again, and the pair headed for the kitchen. "So, what do you want for breakfast today?"

"Umm...." Mokuba bounced along energetically, making it painfully obvious that he was one of the rare breed called 'morning people'. "I want scrambled eggs today!"

"You've got it." Seto went to the fridge, and started pulling out ingredients. For convenience's sake, he cooked for both of them. It would've been easier to hire a cook, most likely, but definitely an unnecessary nuisance. Besides that, he happened to be an uncommonly good cook for his age; Given the proper ingredients, tools, and recipes, he could make a good many things, and expect them to turn out nicely.

Joey, of course, had followed their progress. "Aaaww. Isn't that CUTE?" He grinned lopsidedly. "Those two give you a toothache just looking at them. They're like, totally inseparable. Kinda wish me and my sis were like that..." Joey shrugged, making the camera bob a little. "Whatever. And it looks like they're getting breakfast...." His stomach rumbled forcefully, reminding him that he hadn't yet eaten that day. "Aw, man.... I wonder if they're cooking for three?" They probably weren't, but he could dream, right?

...No, he'd better not. He was unseen; it was best to remain that way, no matter how hungry he was. Still, the situation royally sucked... Maybe he should go grab a bite to eat, then come back?

He finally decided against that course of action, too. This was his best chance, no WAY was he was gonna ruin it now! His stomach would just have to wait for a little while. As if voicing its displeasure with his decision, his stomach rumbled again, even louder than before. The boy winced. "Meh, as if I'd eat anything that _Kaiba_ cooked?" Joey sounded like he was almost trying to convince himself. "It'd probably be poisoned. Maybe not even by his own designs!" He snickered. "I'll bet he couldn't cook to save his life. Wonder how those two survive, do they eat out for every meal? That'd be awful expensive. But then again, if anybody's got the money to do that sorta thing, it's him...." Personally, he'd like going out to eat more often, even if it was more expensive. Leftovers? What on Earth were THOSE?

Seto put down two plates of eggs on the table, and retrieved some clean silverware. "Do you want anything on yours?"

Mokuba looked at the plain eggs. "Teriyaki?" He suggested.

He retrieved the bottle, tossing it over. "There."

"Thanks." Mokuba ^_^ed, and opened the top, sprinkling a little onto a forkful and taking a taste. The child immediately grabbed his water glass, drinking deep "Big brotheeeer! This is picanté sauce!" He whined.

Seto picked up the bottle, and looked at it carefully, unable to keep from cracking a smile. "Why, so it is."

"You knew it all along!" Mokuba accused, pointing dramatically.

"And what if I did?"

"Then..." Mokuba tilted his head, considering it. "Then I'm gonna get you!" He promptly jumped up, charging at Seto with a mock roar.

"You'll never take me alive!" Seto was pushed to the ground, and pinned, Mokuba sitting triumphantly on his chest, and got retaliation in the form of a noogie.

"I gotcha!"

"Alright, alright...." Seto laughed, gently pushing his brother off so he could sit up. The man ran a hand through his mussed hair to try and straighten it.

Radiating pride with his recent victory, Mokuba grabbed the bottle, bounding off to put it back, and take out the REAL teriyaki sauce so their meal could continue in peace. Speaking of victories... "Setoooo, you promised me that we'd go shopping today! We're still going, right? Pleeeeeease?" He squirmed eagerly in his seat.

Seto shook his head in dismay. "Well.... I guess so. After all, I _did_ promise...." Looked like today was all filled up. If Joey didn't get the necessary footage... well, that was his problem!

Joey, meanwhile, was snickering. "Like I was saying, Mokuba's pretty cool. He can get Kaiba to do stuff that nobody else could even come close to. Like actually be NICE, or smile on an occasion where he _isn't_ beating someone else into the ground. Bloody freaking perfectionist..." The boy grumbled. "Aaaaanyhow, he only acts human around Mokuba. Do you suppose that's part of his programming? Maybe he just does it so he doesn't scare the kid. Or maybe he just hates everyone else. I actually think that's a more likely reason. I mean, what did _I_ ever do to _him_ for him to treat me the way he does?! Really, I don't get any respect, it's just terrible...."

An idea entered his mind, which he seized upon before he had a chance to talk himself out of it. After all, if Kaiba didn't give HIM any respect, why should he show any, either? Oh, he was going to get himself into so much trouble for this....

But it was a classic; a real golden oldie. Who didn't love the bucket over the door? He hunted around a bit, and finally located a small plastic bucket, half-full of dirt and laying beside a trowel, at the foot of a tree. A gardener or somebody must've left them there. Shrugging to himself, Joey dismissed the reason they were out as unimportant, and

emptied it out before turning on the hose, carefully filling the bucket up. He stuck in a finger to test it, then promptly pulled it out, satisfied. Icy cold.

Joey went back around to the front door, and quickly nudged the vessel into place, waiting. "Now, we'll see how Kaiba handles being surprised...."

Soon enough, Seto opened the front door to go and summon the limo for their shopping trip. The bucket, true to form, toppled from its perch, the icy water cascading down over the CEO. Plop! To add insult to injury, the bucket spun upside down, falling neatly to rest over his head. Seto stiffened, eyes widening slightly in surprise as he shivered, the frigid water soaking through his clothing to reach bare skin.