Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Half Full or Half Empty? ❯ Bored Bakura = Chaos ( Chapter 28 )

JG: -_- I KNOW it's been forever… sorry for the delay. I just haven't had time, and I'm serious. I'm SO busy!! Anyhow, without further ado, here is the latest chapter ^-^

Disclaimer: Don't own, never will, don't sue.

Warning: Swearing… but no lemon this chappie. Any requested lemons will be appreciatively granted.

Bored Bakura = Chaos
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Marik sat at the kitchen table with his hikari holding a pen in his wobbling right hand. He looked at the pen, holding it clumsily in his fingers, and then looked up at Malik sitting on the other side of the table.

"I don't think I can do this."

Malik raised an eyebrow. "Yes you can. It took me a while to learn how to write too you know. Now think of a word, any word at all."

Marik looked at the ceiling and tapped the pen on his chin subconsciously. Malik smiled a little. "Rod." He finally spoke, and smirked at his hikari.

Malik rolled his eyes. "Alright, rod then. Now, write it. I spelt the whole alphabet out in front of you so it should be easy."

Marik flicked his eyes down to the alphabet that Malik had written at the top of his piece of paper. Underneath he wrote a backward letter `R'. Malik noticed but didn't interfere as Marik wrote the second letter `O' and finally a perfect letter `D'. He smiled and put the pen down, and handed Malik the piece of paper.

"That's good, yami… but your letter `R' is back-to-front. Try another word." Malik said, handing back the piece of paper. The phone suddenly rang.

"I think I'd rather see who's in the phone." The lean, blonde-haired spirit rose from the table and picked up the phone. "What?"

[Uh… Malik?]

"Hold on." Marik chucked the phone across the room and hit Malik square in the forehead with it.

"Ow fuck! You bastard! Hello?" Malik grimaced at his laughing yami.

[Hi, Malik. It's me, Shika.]

Malik blinked a few times and sat up a little. "Shika? Hi…"

[Hey um listen, I need you to do me a favour… if you can.]

"Like what?"

[Well, Ryou's Dad has come over from England… and we want to show him around the city. Ryou would go with just him and his dad but he doesn't know his way around very well…]

"Your point?"

[My point is that Bakura is going to be a nuisance if he comes with us so I need you to look after him for the day… I'm sure your yami will be able to entertain him in some way or another…]

Malik looked at Marik who was sitting on the couch in the corner of the room, looking at him with a curious gaze on his face. "Alright… what time do you want him back?"

[After dinner, or in the morning even. He just gets so annoying and Alex really doesn't need that right now.]

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. When is he coming around?" Malik muttered.

[Uh he just left, he should be around soonish.]

"Alright well have a good day playing `Tour Guide Barbie' then."

Shika rolled her eyes. [Fuck you, Malik.]

"What? Right now?" But before he knew it, Malik was cut off.

"Who was that?" Marik asked while flicking through channels on the television.

"Shika. Bakura is coming over for the day… night, whatever." Malik replied, plopping down next to him.

"Bakura… is staying over?"

Malik looked skeptically at his yami. "Maybe, but I doubt it, so don't get too excited." A nanosecond later a wild-haired yami walked through the door and hung up his coat. He grinned a greasy grin at the two Egyptians. "So, what are we doing today?"

=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=

Taking Alex on a tour around Domino could have been better. Ryou was feeling faint the whole time due to his fever; Shika was getting tremendously bored due to the amount of Japanese antique shops they were stopping at, and the weather was utter crap, about 110 degrees with 90% humidity. In a nutshell, Ryou had never been so relieved in his life to see the front door of Shika's house when they arrived home that evening.

Ryou's father, Alex, yawned and stretched his arms up behind his head. "Well, I'm off to bed. Goodnight son."

"Night Dad." Ryou replied lazily as he lay, leaning on Shika upon the couch. "What time is Bakura due home, Shika?"

Shika shrugged. "Why don't you ask him? He might be staying the night at Malik's."

"Oh." /Bakura?/

//What is it Ryou?//

/When are you coming home?/

//Tomorrow morning, hikari. I have to go, Marik is-AAAH!!//

/Bakura? BAKURA?/

//… I'm ok. See you later, Ryou. Tell Shika I love her.//

Ryou sighed. /Will do./

=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=

"You upright bastard!" Bakura snapped as he pounced on Marik and sent them both flying into a stack of cardboard boxes of junk that Malik still hadn't unpacked since he moved in four months ago.

"What the hell are you morons doing?!" Malik screeched as he came down the stairs with a towel around his waist, toweling his hair dry with another. "You better not have broken my Mother's pottery in those boxes!"

Marik jerked his head up so he could see over the top of the couch at his hikari grimacing at him. "We're playfighting. And we didn't."

"We're BORED!" Bakura choked out during an attempt to free himself out of the stronger spirit's hold. "There's nothing to do in this hole of a place."

"Then why don't you go home? Isis is going to have a fit if she sees the state that this house is in." Malik mumbled as he rolled his eyes.

"Actually…" Bakura began, scratching his head and getting to his feet. "I might have an idea."

Malik narrowed his eyes. "I don't like your ideas."

Bakura smirked. "Why don't we go robbing?"

A tense silence followed as two pairs of heliotrope* eyes fell upon one pair of glinting chocolate ones.

"You can't be serious…" Malik scoffed and went into the kitchen.

"What?" Bakura asked nobody in particular. "I haven't done it for five millennia… it will be fun."

"But who do you plan on robbing?" Marik asked. "Things are different nowadays than they were in our day, Bakura."

"What could possibly go wrong?" Bakura protested. "I was a thief all nineteen years of my life and I never got caught."

"Except when we did get caught it cost us our lives." Marik added.

Bakura grunted. "Well they don't kill you when you get caught stealing these days do they?"

"No, but you still get into a lot of shit!" Malik called from the kitchen.

"Well as long as I don't get killed I don't give a shit! Now come on, let's go and have some fun."

"Don't let him talk you into it yami!" Malik said. "You're both fools. We can have fun without having to rob someone."

"Such as?" Bakura asked.

"I don't know… we could-"

"Exactly as I thought. Come on Marik, let's get out of here."

Malik snorted and went and connected to the internet. He didn't want to have to deal with any phone calls from the police tonight.

~*~

"I think we should take a few precautions before we do the deed, Bakura." Marik grumbled as they were walking down a dark, merciless alleyway in the city.

"Marik have you forgotten? We have our Sennen Items to aid us now; we never used to in ancient times. It will be even simpler than before!"

"That is true, but we have to watch out for the modern technologies that our hikaris talk about!" Marik objected. "For example, every time I try to steal Malik's motorbike to take it for a ride it starts beeping! He calls it an `alarm'. Apparently houses have them too."

"I see…" Bakura said thoughtfully. "All we have to do is find the mechanism that operates the beeping sound and destroy it."

"Alright so… who should we rob?"

Bakura pushed himself up so he was sitting on a dumpster. "Hmm… it should be someone we know, just to make it more interesting. How about… the Pharaoh?"

"He would sense our presence." Marik said, shaking his head. "Let's try someone without another Sennen Item."

"How about that annoyance of a girl… what's her name again?" Bakura said, snapping his fingers constantly trying to think of the person's name.

"Mai?"

"No."

"Uh… Serenity? Isis?"

"No, no. She has brown hair… goes to school with Shika…"

"Oh, her…" Marik said glumly. "Then again… she could be fun to pull a prank on."

"She would be the ultimate victim." Bakura said, grinning to himself devilishly at the thoughts that were now circulating in his twisted mind.

"She seems like the type that would call the police, quickly." Marik added pointlessly.

"That makes the whole experience more thrilling. From what I remember in Battle City, she gets scared senseless over the simplest of things."

"Well then, let's do this."

~*~

Bakura and Marik immediately recognized Anzu's apartment room. The sound blasting out of it nearly made their eardrums burst. She was trying to sing to a song of some form, something poppy and preppy. Bakura pulled out a pocket knife from his coat and placed it under the door so he could see what Anzu was doing. Unfortunately, she was in a rather short skirt. Bakura resisted the urge to gag as she walked past and into another room, closing the door behind her. The sound of a shower starting up was heard.

"Thank Ra that horrific singing has stopped." Marik whispered.

Bakura nodded in agreement. "Now is our chance. Let's just hope she doesn't come out of the shower. I don't know what would be worse, seeing her naked or being caught and getting thrown in prison."

Marik's stomach muscles tensed. "I think I'll go with the first one."

Bakura picked the lock with ease and the two ancient burglars slipped into the residence. Tiptoeing around the living room, they inspected each item and what was worthy of stealing. Bakura's keen eye caught something gold glinting on the coffee table. He went over, only to find that it was a pair of golden bangles.

"These could be worth a few bob." Bakura said as he picked them up and put them on the inside of his coat.

"What's in this box?" Marik asked as he picked up a small box from the table. Some tampons fell out of it.

"Don't touch them, Marik. Shika has them too, and they make her cranky."

"What do they do?"

"Imagine having one of them stuck up your ass all day and you'll know what I mean." Bakura grunted.

"Well no wonder they make her cranky." Marik replied as he carelessly threw the box over his shoulder.

Soon Anzu's dreadful singing started up again. Her singing to Marik and Bakura was like hearing fingernails scraping against a blackboard. They continued to snoop around the bedroom and living room. Bakura had picked up a few necklaces and rings, of how worthy he wasn't sure, but they would do for the mean time.

"Neeeeaaaarrr… faaaarr… whereeeeeeeeeeever you are… I belieeeeeeeeeeve that the heart willllll go ooooooooonnnnnnnn……"

"Here she comes!" Marik whispered, slightly panicked.

"We have to move, fast. Follow me." Bakura grabbed the jewellery and shoved it into his pockets and looked through the crack in the door. He saw a shadow move across the room, followed with a humming sound. "She's going into the kitchen. Now is our chance to get out of here."

With Marik following behind, the ex-thief king slipped slyly into the living room silently. Turning the corner into the foyer which went past the kitchen, Bakura and Marik stopped dead in their tracks.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Oh Gods!"

"My eyes!"

"It burns!"

"Somebody amputate my retinas!"

Anzu stood naked behind her kitchen table screaming as the two thieves went mentally and physically blind. There was so much screaming going on that they didn't know who was screaming louder. Finally Anzu grabbed her towel and began shrieking incoherent things at the intruders. Then she grabbed for the phone. That's when Bakura began to panic.

"Shit! Marik she's calling the cops!"

"I'm outa here!" Marik shrieked and ran towards the nearest window and toppled out of it.

Bakura slapped a hand against his forehead at the idiotic move Marik made, but had no choice, so quickly followed suit. The landing was going to hurt. "Fuck!" Bakura yelped as he landed inelegantly on a pile of muddy leaves.

Marik mumbled something and groaned in pain as he rolled out of a rose bush. "Ouch! Ra damn it! Curse the man who invented such a plant!" Marik plucked a thorn out of his ass.

"We have to keep running! Those retarded cops are going to be here any minute!" Bakura hissed as he pulled Marik to his feet and began to run down the street.

~*~

Bakura and Marik flung themselves through Malik's door after about twenty-minutes of non-stop sprinting. They ran upstairs and hurtled onto Marik's bed and locked the door behind them, panting and sweating from the exhausting run. Once he had caught his breath, Bakura poured all the stolen goods onto the bed. He scrunched his nose up as he examined the jewellery he had taken.

"This is all crap, Marik." Bakura scoffed, as he read the `made in China' imprints on the inside of the rings that he had taken. "This jewellery isn't worth stones."

"What about what I got?" Marik suggested as he took a single silver and diamond ring from his coat.

Bakura inspected the ring with a close eye and slowly turned his gaze back to Marik. "Marik, you're a genius."

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*= Heliotrope: Another kewl fancy word for purple or lavender ^_^

Next chapter: Ok so that wasn't entirely as I had it planned out… when WILL Sevilin get the death penalty? Who knows? Not even I do -_-

Updates: Not entirely sure.