Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Marik's Insane Plot or Bakura gets pissed! ❯ The Last Virgin is Ryou! ( Chapter 23 )

Disclaimer: None of this is mine. If you are a serious fan, have no sense of humor or hate Shonen-ai, this is not for you.

CHAPTER 23

Bakura yawned as he slipped the key into the door lock. In a few minutes he would see his Ryou bunny and they would snuggle and who knows what else all night. He would first have to make it up to the albino big time for being a bit rude in the club toward him. Bakura felt he should have not taken his frustration out on the one he loved.

The house was quiet. Bakura only heard the sound of someone cooking come from the kitchen. He wondered if Ryou was there or the cook. To his disappointment, it was only the cook. Nodding to his help, Bakura walked out of the kitchen to his office.

Walking into his small office, Bakura noticed a piece of folded paper with his name on it. Picking it up, the demon wondered if it was a love note…of course, he didn't think that…oh no! His eyes widened as he unfolded the paper.

Dear Bakura:

Hi! How are you! I'm fine! Do you know that the psychiatrist I sent to the Shadow Realm said I was certifiably insane? I knew that! I just needed someone to tell me!

I'm getting off topic here. I have your Ryou and he's as cuddly as a bunny! I love his snowy white hair and the way he swats my hand away as I run my fingers through it. Too bad you took his virginity! Now I can't be the first on our wedding night!

Let me tell you about the wedding! I have a dress all picked out for Ryou-kins! It's so pretty, but it's off white. Too bad. He would have looked great in a pure white wedding dress. You're invited of course to witness the blessed event. There will be food and fun and booze after! Oh, and please bring some wenches with you? We'll need entertainment!

See you soon and oh…I have Ryou by the way if you haven't all ready figured that out! I am going to go and get myself some shots and a flea dip! See ya!

Love and Kisses,

Marik

Bakura's eye twitched in annoyance. Marik had Ryou and he was going to force his poor love to marry him! Ugh! Oh he would be there all right! Bakura would be there to slit his throat and possibly his manhood off not necessarily in that order! Ryou was HIS AND ONLY HIS!!! NO ONE TOUCHED HIS BUNNY!!!

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"I am not putting this on!" Ryou protested as Marik tried to get the albino to wear a white wedding dress.

"But you would look so pretty in it!" Marik pouted.

"I AM NOT WEARING A WEDDING DRESS!!" Ryou shouted making the insane one back away.

"Okay! I'll take it back." Marik slowly took the dress away and then ran out of the room.

Ryou sat down on the bed in total disgust. The insane idiot wanted to please Ryou, but the albino wished he would stop. He wanted Bakura, not Marik.

"Psssssst!!" Ryou heard someone, but looking around, he couldn't see anyone. "Look over by the door!" There he saw…

"Malik?" Ryou questioned noticing the transparent boy. "What are you doing here!"

"Look, I wanted to warn you about Marik…" He started.

"It's a little too late, don't you think! I NEED BAKURA RIGHT NOW!!!" Ryou thundered.

"Why?" Malik asked.

"So he can beat that psychotic son of a bitch up!" Ryou seethed. "Really now! I can get a better wedding dress across town!" Malik sweat dropped at that remark.

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"And then we'll go to Cairo, and then we'll go along the Nile and then…" At this point, Yami tuned Yuugi out.

`All this just to have two weeks of wild sex…I will resist killing myself from listening to his babble…I will resist…' He kept chanting over and over to himself.

Now it wasn't that Yami fell out of love with his light, he just wished Yuugi would take a breath or at least calm down. It was then he felt some disturbance in the Shadow Realm. Closing his eyes, he mentally went the dark realm to find out what the source was. There, in the distance was Marik talking to the Judge…that ugly mother-fucking judge man! UGH!!! What the hell did he want with that monster? Was he that drunk and desperate?

"MARIK!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!!!" Yami demanded.

"Oh Yamikins! I'm marrying Ryou! You're invited to the wedding you know! We're going have so much fun and a lot of stuff is going to happen there! I was going to originally kidnap your light, Ryou and Mokuba, but I chose Ryou because he's cute like a bunny!" He clapped his hands together, his eyes growing large like a psycho.

"You are seriously twisted, you know that?" Yami asked.

"Of course! My psychiatrist told me so before I sent him here, right?" Marik asked as a man appeared next to him.

"Yes. I found him to have a severe personality disorder followed with extreme psychotic behavior. He also believes that he will rule the world some day." The psychiatrist said in a bored tone. "Do you know how many patients I come across like this?" He asked as Marik made him go away.

"Bye bye!" Marik waved enthusiastically. "I love to rule the world some day part! It just makes me feel warm and fuzzy all over."

"Riiiiiiiiight." Yami raised a brow. "So what is with the judge man here?"

"Well, I am going to have him marry Ryou and I. It's going to be perfect!" Marik jumped up and down for joy. "I picture all my stuffed animals being at the wedding along with the people I invited. I want Yuugi to be the ring bearer and I'll have to kidnap some bride's maids. Hee hee! And then I'm going to watch as Bakura cries over the loss of his bunny!"

"Oooookay." Yami agreed. `More like Bakura is going to gut you when he gets there.' He thought to himself. "I have to go…I think Yuugi's calling me." He vanished opening his eyes only to hear his other going on down the list of things they would need for their vacation. `If I sent Yuugi to the Shadow Realm, would anyone miss him?' He mentally sighed.

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Ryou had snuck around where ever he was. Of course he did not know where he was to begin with, but he wanted to get away and get back to Bakura. He was sure that the other was going out of his mind with worry.

Ryou kept walking until he found a room labeled "plot holes". His eyes widened as he opened the door quietly. In there sat a writer looking over the script. Looking up at Ryou, said writer smiled and waved the youth in.

"Would you believe this! I mean, first you, Yuugi and Mokuba were suppose to be virgin sacrifices. Then Marik kidnaps Mokuba, Yuugi then loses his virginity…" The writer started as Ryou's left eye twitched.

"You mean to tell me, he got laid before I did??? I AM THE CUTE ONE!!! I SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN LAID FIRST!!"

"Well of course, but we wanted something very special for you." The writer emphasized.

"I was the last one to get laid? I WAS THE LAST VIRGIN IN THIS STORY!!!?" Ryou thundered.

"Well, if it's any consolation, Anzu's still a virgin!" The writer smiled.

"WHO THE HELL WOULD WANT TO DO HER!!!!" Ryou shouted. "I can't believe you made me torture Bakura for 20 or so chapters while Yuugi got laid sooner! INJUSTICE!!!"

"Did someone say injustice?" Wufei popped into the room.

"GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE JUSTICE FREAK!!!" Ryou shouted in seething anger. "TELL HEERO AND DUO I'M NOT INTERESTED IN A THREESOME EITHER FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME!!! STOP LEAVING MESSAGES ON MY MACHINE OR I WILL SEND BAKURA AFTER THEM!!"

"Uuuuh! I'm out of here!" Wufei ran out of the room.

Ryou then proceeds to tie up the said writer to the chair only leaving the arms free and the computer glowing.

"Start writing! I have to go see where Marik is!" Ryou stormed out slamming the door shut.

"Yeesh! He needs Midol!" The writer shook their head.

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Leaving the "plot holes" room, Ryou ran smack into Marik. The albino looked up with wide brown eyes and then backed away. A pout came to the insane one's face.

"Why are you running away? Don't you looooooooooove me?" Marik asked, eyes wide as saucers as tears began to form.

"NO YOU PSYCHOTIC JERK!!! I DON'T LOVE YOU!!" Ryou shouted not really caring if he hurt the psycho blonde's feelings! "I love Bakura! Why can't you find someone else for crying out loud?!"

"Like who!" He demanded.

"How about your other self! You know, Malik? I am sure he would be better suited to you then I would!" Ryou crossed his arms over his chest, tapping his foot impatiently…the more he could convince Marik that someone else was better for him, the sooner he could leave!

"Oooooooooooooooooo!!" Marik clasped his hands together like an idiot. "I forgot about him! He does look like a bunny in a sort of vicious twisted cute way! We are both alike! We both are the same person! We both like killing people! I'm the only one who likes seeing his sister naked though! Oh well! We can work that one out!" He grins. "Oh by the way, you can leave! Tell Bakuchan I say hi!" He merrily skipped away. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOH MALIK!!" He shouted.

Oh God! He felt sorry for Malik! Maybe the Egyptian could tame the idiot or at least convince him to get a lobotomy! With that last thought, Ryou ran for an exit!

TBC…

Sorry for the delay in updating. I've been busy with work and life! Plus, I am writing a serious fic…well…as serious as it can get! ;)