Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Potholes in Tokyo II ❯ Chapter Three ( Chapter 3 )

Potholes in Tokyo

AN: Sorry it took so long, dudes and dudettes! Life…happened. My teachers all swamped me with projects… I have four due next week, but I finished them after many hours… all I have left is a collage of why plants are important… do you think I should glue a picture of Kurama to it? (Tee-hee… if not for the pretty plants, there would be no pretty Kura-chan! And that would be sad).

…I have allergies… mou. My nose is so stuffy it's hard to breathe… And it's barely spring and I was overheating outside today… saa. This is gonna be a sucky summer, isn't it?

Chapter Three

"You know, I think we should do something to cheer Malik up," Yami said, glancing over at the blonde. Malik was watching a re-run of Marik the Dinosaur, nose pressed into the television screen. "I'm afraid he's going to mess up my TV by doing that…"

"Well, Yami, you did promise me that you'd take me to see The Tortilla Chip Man Meets the Evil Furbies… or whatever it's was called. That's bound to make Malik happy!"

"Ehh… I'm not sure it's safe to take him out in public," Yami said uncertainly.

"Come on, Yami, don't be a wet blanket! It'll be fun!... and we can invite Bakura and Ryou!" Yuugi smiled such a genki smile that Yami just couldn't bear to let it fall.

"Oh, all right," he said, sighing. Yuugi merrily skipped off to find Bakura. "Ouch," Yami said, as he hit himself in the head with a plank.

(Pie iesu domine… dona eis requiem… BONK! Tee-hee!)

"Ouch. Itai. Ouch. Itai. Ouch…"

"You know, self-mutilation isn't the answer. You're not Siddartha Gautama…" Malik said.

"WATCH THE TELEVISION, MORTAL!" Yami yelled.

"YOU DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, PHARAOH!"

"…are you a member of Bakura's cult?"

"Ra no! Why would I want to hang out with that loser? He's your slave!"

"Then why do all of you stupid people think I'M THE PHARAOH!"

"…because you have pot leaf hair!" Malik said, giggling happily for no apparent reason.

"WELL AT LEAST I HAVEN'T BEEN SMOKING IT!" Yami shrieked.

"Yamiiiii… why are you yelling?" Yuugi asked, somehow appearing right next to Yami's elbow. "It… it makes me sad when people yell at each other…" the little boy said, sniffing in an uber-kawaii way.

Yami's gaze softened. "All right, Yuugi. I won't yell at Malik…"

"You're the most whipped Pharaoh I've ever seen…"

"You'd be whipped too if you lived with this gorgeous angel!" Yami gestured to Yuugi, who blushed a dark crimson and shyly looked away.

"And WHY, exactly, are you wanting me to go watch a CHILDREN'S movie with you imbeciles?" Bakura asked angrily.

"Because it was the only movie on your mental level," Yami retorted.

Bakura huffed. "Fine then… but I'm not cooking you dinner."

"Then I'm not giving you a paycheck!" Yami said brilliantly, smirking.

Bakura growled. "Fine…"

"Yay! Let's go!" Yuugi said happily, jumping up and down.

*~*

"What about my Ryou?" Bakura asked as he climbed into the back of the limo. "If Ryou doesn't go, then I'm not going." Bakura crossed his arms over his chest.

"Ryou said he'd meet us in the limo; he still has to put on some clothes."

"Well, gee, I don't think anyone would mind if he came out here starkers…" Malik said thoughtfully as he hopped in beside the cook.

"I WOULD!" Bakura screeched, punching the back of the blonde's head.

"Oro," Malik said, crumpling to the floorboard of the limo.

"A little overprotective, Bakura?" Yami asked, arching an eyebrow at the insane chef.

"I am the only one who gets to touch my Ryou!" Bakura declared.

"And even that hasn't happened yet," Yami teased.

"Urusai… baka Pharaoh…" Bakura grumbled from the back seat.

"Baku-chan!" Ryou said, giggling happily, as he climbed into the limo. He glomped Bakura, smiling brightly. "Ai shiteru!"

"Ai shiteru mo," Bakura said, grinning and wrapping his arms around `his Ryou'.

"I don't know if I trust the two of you in my backseat…" Yami said, winking at Bakura in the driver's mirror.

Ryou `Eep'ed, turning as red as a radish.

"Hn. Baka," Bakura said softly, burying his nose in his koi's silver hair.

Something on the floor of the limo caught Ryou's attention. "Hey, why is Malik asleep on the floorboard?"

Bakura sweat-dropped.

*~*

"Yamiii, will you get me a soda?" Yuugi asked as he stared up at the man with gigantic, googly amethyst eyeballs.

"Certainly," Yami answered.

"He would even buy you yaoi doujinshi if you asked him to," Malik said offhandedly, then realized exactly what this meant to him. "You know what, Yuugi… let's be best friends!"

Yuugi sweat-dropped, backing away. He turned back to Yami, who was buying a super size soda for him. "Hey, sexy," the clerk said.

Yami's eyes bulged to the point that they nearly popped out of his eye sockets. He laughed nervously, wondering what to do-unlike Bakura, Ryou, and Malik, he wasn't used to being hit on by other men.

"YOU GET AWAY FROM MY YAMI! RIGHT NOW, YOU FREAKY HENTAI!" Yuugi screeched at the clerk, successfully saving Yami from even more embarrassing situations.

Bakura's chin dropped to the floor. "Whoa…"

"Uhh…" Yuugi's eyes darted around the room-everyone in the crowded theater lobby was staring at him. Yuugi blushed. "Erm… gomen nasai! I… didn't mean to yell so loudly… actually, I didn't even know I could yell like that…" Yuugi sweat-dropped.

"You're certainly overprotective of Yami," Malik observed. (Thank you, Captain Obvious!)

"And once again, it seems that Yami is the uke…" Bakura whispered, but loud enough for Yami to hear him clearly.

Yami was about to attack Bakura with his drink, but was stopped by Yuugi. "Come on, let's go see the movie!" Yuugi darted happily ahead to the place where the movie theater employees collected patrons' movie tickets.

"Tortilla Chip Man, eh? Aren't you people a little old to be watching kiddie movies?" the employee asked, chuckling at them.

"You see, my cousin here," Bakura began, gesturing at Malik, "He… he just really gets a `thrill' from little kid movies… if you know what I mean," Bakura murmured. "He hasn't been outside the booby hatch for five years, so I thought I'd let him have some fun."

"Oh, I see," the clerk-woman said. "Well, I hope you have fun watching your movie, you adorable little hentai!"

Malik glared dangerously at Bakura. "Kill, burn DIE!"

Bakura rolled his eyes, opening the door to the screening room. "Eunuchs first," he said, flashing Malik a charming smile as he held the door open for him.

"Bakura… I hope you're not expecting me to cry at your funeral…"

"Why would I have a funeral?" Bakura scoffed.

"Because Malik's about to kill you," Yami answered.

"…"

"What's wrong now?"

"You… you said y-you wouldn't cr-cry for meeeee…" Bakura whined, tears flowing down his cheeks. "HOW CAN YOU BE SO CRUEL AND MALICIOUS, PHARAOH!?"

Ryou sighed, wrapping an arm around his koi's shoulders. "It'll be all right, `Kura, he didn't really mean it…"

O.o

"You… you made Bakura cry!" Yuugi yelled. "I… I don't know whether I should laugh or be angry at you…"

"I AM A MEMBER OF THE GINYU FORCE!"

*~*

The film had only been rolling for ten minutes, and Malik was the only one watching. Ryou had fallen asleep with his head on Bakura's shoulder, while Bakura was trying to ignore how a posse of little kids kept tugging on his demonic bunny ears (AKA the really pointy pieces of hair). Yuugi was rather preoccupied by the advances of a somehow intoxicated Yami.

"Tee-hee," Yami said, all giggles and grins. "Oh Yuugi boy, I love you so!" he sang, going from the intended key to something raucous and terrible.

"Y-Yami…" Yuugi said uncertainly, blushing as tanned arms latched onto his waist. "Yami, are you all right?"

"I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?" Yami asked, peering up at Yuugi with sparkly crimson eyes.

"Eek!" Yuugi yelped, scared and confused by Yami's sudden change in character. "What's wrong with you, Yami?"

"He's drunk," Bakura muttered, glaring warningly at a little girl who had just yanked on a lock of his hair. "Grr… if Ryou wasn't using me for a pillow I'd smack you, little girl…"

"There must be something wrong with my eyes; I can't take them off you."

"…"

"I'm wearing Revlon colorstay lipstick, want to help me test the claim that it won't kiss off?"

Yuugi fainted.

"Muhahahaha!" Yami said happily, pulling the unconscious boy into his lap and petting his hair.

"Aak! Come back to me, my love!" Malik yelled as he pressed his face against the widescreen.

"And, erm… all you little kids out there… LEAVE THE ROOM!" came the shouting of Marik the Dinosaur from the speakers. "Ahem. Umm… Well, I just wanted to say… Malik, I'm sorry… I was being stupid," Marik said, pausing to glare at someone off-screen. "So, erm… what I want to say is… I LOVE YOU, MALIK!"

AN: Hello, all of you peoples! Erm… those were some bad pick-up lines, ne? Mwahahaha! Well, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please review… in fact… I will only post the next chapter after I get FIVE REVIEWS!

*crickets chirping*

YOU DEFER TO ME, MORTAL! MUHAHAHAH!

(Btw, that's only my desperate ploy to get reviews… I feel so lonely and unfulfilled… saa.)

TRT + Futomi-chan = True love!