Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Reasons I'm Alone ❯ Reasons I'm Alone ( Chapter 1 )

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Reasons I'm Alone
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All the things I felt and never shared.  All the times she was lonely with me there.  Tears I wouldn't let fall from my eyes, and how I let her go without a fight.
When you think about it, it was kind of funny. All those chances and he still let them slip through his fingers. Now all he had left of her was a memory of what might have been. Then again, as Mai had said, they had taken different roads. Who woulda thought that Doma would have changed so much between them?  Then again there was Valon. Of course it probably didn't help much when he had been too embarrassed on Kaiba's airship to even list her among his friends. Looking back, he wasn't all that certain why he hadn't truly considered her.  After all, if it hadn't been for her he... Oh well.  She was happy with Valon and that was that.  After all when you don't share what's on their heart they usually walk away.  Not that they wouldn't walk away anything if they really knew about his life and how complicated it had gotten. Then he had finally turned eighteen and gotten out of his father's house.
While his father most certainly would have never won father-of-the-year, there was a time the old man even had the right to be called dad. What hurts the most though is the memory of the man he used to be before alcohol changed him into a stranger he had no wish to be related to. It's strange sometimes how you imagine what life would be without someone then for it to come true.  The irony was that the old man had died from the effects of his addictions not too long after Joey had left. Tristan hadn't understood why he had grieved, but it was for the dad he had been long before the divorce. Joey shook the memories from his head because the last thing he wanted to do was to cast a shadow on his reunion with his friends.
Turns out that fate does have a sense of humor. Well that or time truly does change people as it most certainly had with Kaiba. Sure there had been a softening after Yugi's duel with the other Yugi, but there was something in the normally icy blue eyes he had never seen before. Figures that once you'd learn the rules that things would get changed on ya. Guess nearly losing your sibling would do that to a person. Course he wouldn't know since he hadn't seen his own sister in a few years. He shrugged off the uneasy feelings he got when he thought of her. Some big brother he turned out to be. "Joey, are you alright?"
Joey tried to force a smile when he faced Kaiba, but found himself unable to pretend around him like he could with his other friends. He sighed then shook his head wearily, allowing his hair to shadow his eyes like he did in the past. "Not really, Kaiba. Ya see I lost track of my sista a bit after graduation. Now I have no idea where she is or even if…"
Concern lit Kaiba's blue eyes when the blond's voice trailed off with a faraway look in his once molten brown eyes. This was not the Joey he remembered. Yugi did mention that he was different when he had saw him upon his return to Domino, but this went beyond 'different' for Joey since he seemed so sad if not lonely. Though he could tell that time on the road had given the blond a maturity he hadn't possessed seven years ago and he was now well-known among the top ranks of Duel Monsters. Yet that was true years ago, even if he had been loathed to admit it back then. No, there was something else behind those brown eyes despite the pain of a lost sister just what exactly was a cause for interest to the point that he heard himself answer "I can help you find her if you want."
Skepticism along with hope touched the depths of his eyes. "You would do that for me? You do remember who you're talkin' to right, Kaiba?"
"Please just Seto. I get enough formality in my world that it gets old after awhile. This is my chance to get away and just enjoy things I had denied myself for all this time."
Joey blinked before a slow 'real' smile touched his face. "Wow you really have changed. I have to admit that I didn't believe Yug at first, but I like it. Kinda gives ya hope for the rest of us."
Seto would have commented if a familiar, yet toned down, head of colored spiked hair had caught Joey's attention. "Hey, Yug, how's it going?"
"Joey, it's so good to see you! I hope you're staying for awhile."
Joey hugged him then rubbed the back of his neck self-consciously. "Yeah actually I am now that I've retired."
"You what?" Several voices rang out when the music stopped abruptly.
The blond sweat-dropped at his friends' reaction then shrugged. "Well to be honest, Yug, Duel Monsters just isn't the same without Kaiba or you. I mean there has been some good challenges recently, but it's different is all."
Compassion lit Téa's eyes as she placed a hand on his broad shoulder. "Does this have anything to do with Mai and Valon getting married?"
Surprise and a hint of pain lit his eyes before the mask returned. "Nah just nothing stays the same. Sides I got a job with Industrial Illusions as a games analyst so it's not like I'm completely quitting Duel Monsters."
"Wow that's great, Joey!"
"I thought so too." His smile faded just a bit when he noticed something, or rather someone, missing. "Say where's Tristan? I thought he'd be here by now."
His friends' sudden nervousness created a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. "What's wrong?"
This time it was Mokuba who broke the news. "Well Tristan got back into the wrong crowd and now we don't know where he is or even if…"
Mokuba's voice broke off at the fiery look that had returned to Joey's face and the way his eyes became a molten brown once more. His right hand clenched and unclenched reflexively until he turned abruptly and drove it into the wall. He breathed heavily when his head dropped over his outstretched arm as the muscles under his t-shirt rippled tensely. Seto's hand rested on his shoulder with the hopes of calming him with the light pressure of his long fingers. Brown eyes clenched shut until the warm voice caressed his ear. "Joey, it isn't exactly what you think. Roland discovered that it wasn't by choice as Hirutani had something on him. Anyway it ended bad in a deal gone wrong and he was relocated for his protection."
"I understand." He sighed in defeat then turned to look gratefully into the blue eyes that haunted his dreams. "Thanks, Seto. It's just with what all we went through together. The thought that he has some new life somewhere else will take some getting used to."
The younger Kaiba shifted uncertainly. "I'm sorry, Joey, I didn't mean to say it that way."
Joey turned to ruffle the teen's hair. "No prob, kiddo. I was the one to jump to conclusions."
"It will turn out okay, Joey, you still got us." Yugi said hopefully.
"Yeah I do and there's no place I'd rather be."
Being the good friend he is, Yugi followed him outside when he took a breather. "There's something else going on isn't there, Joey?"
"Ya know me too well, Yug, but yeah. Have ya ever wanted to go back and just change things with the hope that things could be different?"
"A few times, but unfortunately you can't."
"True. Well maybe one day I'll get another chance." Joey said more to himself as he glanced at the hazy city sky.
"Just because things didn't work out with Mai, doesn't mean that there isn't someone else out there for you." The shorter man said with a pointed look at his taller friend. "In fact, they may be closer than you think."
"Hn. I guess you're right, Yug. Well I should go now since I gotta get up early for our first meeting."
"Okay, tell me how it goes."
"Sure will, Yug, and congrats on finally poppin' the question to Téa."
"How did you...?  We haven't even announced it yet." He spluttered with a deep blush on his cheeks.
"I got eyes and I saw the shiny rock on her hand. The other Yugi would be proud."
"Yeah I'm sure he would." Yugi said softly as he watched his best friend walk away.
The reasons I'm alone I know by heart, but I dont wanna spend forever in the dark. I swear next time I'll hang on for dearlife. If love ever gives me another try.
~js~
Theres no changin' things that we regret, the best that we can hope for is one more chance. The best that we can hope for is one more chance. If the hands of time could just move in reverse, I wouldn't make the same mistake again with her
The announcement of Yugi and Téa's engagement hit him a little harder than he thought it would. After all, the only thing they had together was a brief fling in New York after a chance encounter. He hadn't realized how attached he had become to the aspiring dancer until she had left to fulfill her dreams. Now she would never know how much she meant to him. Still he wouldn't call it love just something more than he had imagined. Then again that wasn't enough to keep someone when they had a better chance of happiness with someone else. Especially since he had always liked one of her friends more. However, he had lost that chance long ago despite what Yugi had said. Not that it mattered since the company still kept him busy despite the fact that Mokuba had taken over more of his duties as Vice President. Yes, business was good with the success of their parks and the agreement they now had with Pegasus. A soft laugh left his lips when he remembered Joey's reaction to the news that he actually worked with Pegasus now as well. Things truly did change."
Just then a buzz broke his musings and then his secretary's voice filled the air. "Sir, your partner is here."
"Very well, Marcie, send him in."
Then again some things never change, Kaiba realized when the door opened to Pegasus' over exuberant greeting of "Kaiba-boy, miss me?"
"Oh yes, Maxie, it's been soooo long I had nooooo idea what to do with myself." He mocked him as he rolled his eyes.
Pegasus frowned when a familiar blond snickered behind him. "Really, Kaiba, there is no need to make fun of me. You might give Joseph the wrong impression of our relationship…unless that was your intention."
Redness colored Seto's cheeks as he tried vainly to find the words to erase the shock from his friend's face until he laughed. "No sweat, Seto, I already know how much a tease Pegasus is. He's almost as bad as Duke."
"There is actually someone worse than Pegasus?" Seto asked in horror.
"Wow, Kaiba, who would have thought you'd be able to keep up." The dreaded dice master crooned as he had his entrance.
"Considering who I now work with." Kaiba sighed. "Pegasus, you never said anything about a group meeting."
He shrugged his shoulders then took a seat. "You never asked, Kaiba-boy. So where is your adorable little brother?"
"Taking care of personal business and I wouldn't call him that if I were you. He has a nasty habit of getting back at people in interesting ways." He added with a mock shudder which brought a light laugh from Joey that almost caused him to shiver. "So what did you have in mind anyway?"
"Well there is this game I'm interested in making which incorporates both Duel Monsters and Dungeon Dice Monsters along with your VR system."
The meeting was intense and left all involved drained, especially Joey. He stretched almost like a cat rather than the dog Kaiba had always envisioned. With a soft growl of his own at the directions his thoughts had taken, he shook his head in an effort to drive away any mental pictures he had. Well that was until he opened his eyes to find concerned brown eyes really close to face. Blue eyes blinked as the skin under them heated up at the blonde's unexpected closeness. "You alright, Seto?"
"Um want to go out to lunch?"
Joey blinked at the abrupt question. "With you?"
"Yeah uh…just forget-"
"Sure I'd love to, Seto." This time it was his turn to blush. "That is as long as you have no plans."
"If I didn't I wouldn't have asked. Besides I was gonna go with Mokuba, but he had other plans and I don't wish to eat alone."
Laughter sounded from the doorway so they looked to see an expressive pout on Duke's face. "Guess I lost…again."
"Of course, Duke, I usually am right about such things." Pegasus purred with a Cheshire cat grin as he brushed the dark hair from petulant green eyes. "Come now, Duke, losing isn't so bad and I promise to make it up to you."
"Well in that case." The dice master licked his lips then sauntered out of the office.
Joey and Seto both shuddered with sickened expressions on their faces after Pegasus had hurried after Duke. "I don't even wanna know."
"That makes two of us." Seto deadpanned then added in a rush. "So, Chinese or Italian?"
"After that I think Italian." Joey shuddered again as he handed Seto his coat. "To think I work with them now. What was I thinkin'?"
"Scary huh? Let's get outta here before I consider changing offices."
"Right behind ya, Seto." He smiled at the view before he skated out the door behind him.
This could be the start of a beautiful friendship…maybe even more.
The reasons I'm alone I know by heart, but I don't wanna spend forever in the dark. I swear next time I'll hang on for dear life. If love ever gives me another try.
Another Try by Josh Turner
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End