Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Room For Rent II ❯ Chapter 7 ( Chapter 7 )

Room for Rent II

Chapter Seven

"Now, you put the Starburst in your mouth…" Ryou demonstrated, popping the wrapped candy in his mouth. A second later, he pulled the wrapper out of his mouth, holding it up for Bakura to see it.

"I still don't understand how you can do that!" Bakura said hopelessly.

"Excuse me! You know very well how I can do that!"

"…huh?"

"You've kissed me before, haven't you?" Ryou asked, grinning.

Bakura leaned forward, pressing his hand to Ryou's forehead. "You feeling O.K., itooshi?"

"Baka."

"That's not nice, Ryou. I was worried about you. I thought you were sick or something. I mean, you're acting so affectionate."

"I was having Bakura withdrawals," Ryou mumbled as he reached out to hug Bakura.

"Aww, you're so cute," Bakura said, nuzzling Ryou's cheek. "…When are we going to start arguing?"

Ryou sighed. "I dunno…"

"But it makes the readers giggle when we argue! And then they praise the authoress baka-sama!"

"Why do we care about baka-sama?"

"Erm… she pays us!" Bakura declared.

"…but she refuses to write yaoi scenes…"

"Yes, that /is/ bad. But…err… we get to make fun of Otogi!"

"Otogi is my friend…"

"You should pick better friends, then!" Bakura said vehemently.

"I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tired…"

"Wow, Ryou. That's a lot of o's."

Ryou glared at Bakura before deciding to use him as a pillow. He rested his head in Bakura's lap and closed his eyes.

"You're warm…"

"I'm exothermic!" Bakura said happily.

"That's endothermic, stupid," Ryou grumbled. "Reptiles are exothermic."

"Well, excuse me for not being a science major!"

"Abujabujabujaaaaaaah…"

"What?"

"Bakura… you smell like… a Bakura."

"Oh, really?"

Ryou nodded. "I think being hit on by the teacher messed up your brain functions," Bakura remarked.

"Teacher…finals… AHHH! FINALS!" Ryou sat up immediately. "What do I do, what do I do?!" He ran around in circles, wondering what to do.

"Calm down, Ryou! This is no reason to wear holes in the carpet!"

"B-but… I'M GOING TO FAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL!" Ryou sobbed into Bakura's shoulder.

"It'll be O.K. You know, we could always go to those people who run the college and tell them about Mikuni's misconduct… and then he'd get kicked out and you wouldn't have to worry!"

"NO!" Ryou yelled suddenly. "I'M GOING TO PROVE TO HIM THAT I CAN ACE MY FINAL! I DON'T NEED TO SLEEP WITH A TEACHER TO GET GOOD GRADES!"

"…"

"RIGHT! …I'd better start studying!"

"…You know, Ryou… I think you're taking this a little too seriously. Just relax, all right?"

"I can't! I have to get an A on my final! This is important!!!"

"B-but… I thought I was finally going to get some!" Bakura cried, looking heartbroken.

"You'll get some eventually," Ryou said tonelessly. "Just be patient."

"Will it come from you? I don't want to sleep with Mariku and Malik!"

"…are you /that/ sexually frustrated, `Kura?" Ryou asked, staring at his lit textbook.

"…possibly."

"Bully for you then, eh? `Cuz like I said, she doesn't write yaoi scenes! Gwa ha ha ha!"

"You're evil, Ryou… and so are you, you stupid author-person!"

(I feel as if I'm making certain psychotic people angry…)

"I'm going to go pick up my stuff from Mariku's house, all right? And you can study and your father and Pegasus can do naughty things. That way we're all happy, see!"

"Hmm… bye, `Kura!"

Bakura was walking to Mariku's house when he saw two people he knew standing on the sidewalk.

"KAIBAAAAAAA!"

"Yeah… I wanna take you to a Kaiba…" murmured Jou, who was swaying drunkenly over the sidewalk.

"Are you…Baka-ra?"

Bakura coughed. "Ba-kur-a. You know, with an `urrr' sound."

"Right. Whatever."

"I wanna spend all your money at the Kaiba, Kaiba!" Jou sang as the latched onto Kaiba's arm, hugging it.

"I see you and the blonde hit it off quite well," Bakura remarked.

"Yes. But then again, gentlemen /do/ prefer blondes," Kaiba said. "How are you and Ryou doing?"

"We're not /doing/ anything…"

Seto smirked. "I wouldn't think so. I mean, if he never gave /me/ any, how can you expect him to give /you/ any?"

"I don't like you."

"Of course not. Sometimes I'm the good guy and at other times I'm the bad guy, but I'm always a prick."

"You're a superstar at the Kaibaaa!"

"Stop singing, puppy!"

"I've got something to put in you at the Kaiba, Kaiba!"

"Oh no you don't! YOU'RE THE UKE, DARN IT ALL!"

Bakura's eyes widened; he took a step backward.

"You've been a bad puppy, Jounouchi! I'm taking you home /right now/ and sending you up to my room!"

"Oh, harsh," Bakura said, wincing.

Seto smirked evilly. "I know."

"Let's start a war… let's start a nuclear war… at the KAIBA!"

"Come on, puppy," Seto ordered, yanking Jounouchi along by the collar of his shirt.

"…Now, /that/ is an odd couple if I've ever seen one…"

When Bakura arrived at Mariku's house, Anzu was sitting on the couch.

"What are you doing here, Bakura? Are you still stalking me? Did my rejecting you hurt you so deeply that you still long for me now?"

Bakura rolled his eyes, walking over to the guest room. He dragged his stuff from the closet, tossing it into an old Wal-Mart bag. Anzu had followed him into the room, and was saying annoying things at him… and stuff.

"So, are you happy with Ryou? Happier than you were with me?"

"I suppose so."

"You suppose so?"

"Well, yes. I mean, being run over by rapidly mossy llamas is better than living with you…"

"I think that when you went gay, you also lost a few brain cells…" Anzu remarked, giving Bakura a funny look.

"I think the loss of brain cells happened just before I decided to go out with you," Bakura retorted, dropping socks into his bag.

"Does he treat you well?"

"He cooks me stuff. Like Ramen… and toast… and spinach. I'm Popeye the Sailor Man!"

"You're a freak."

"And this is coming from the one who keeps Crayola products in her fridge?"

"It keeps the markers from drying out!" Anzu shrieked.

"Trust me, apricot girl. You've been tricked. If refrigeration kept the markers from drying out, it would say so on the box. And so far, the only thing on that box of yours is a crappy picture of a dinosaur."

Anzu slapped him… for some odd reason.

"That didn't hurt," Bakura mumbled, picking up his bag and marching out the door.

"Gay men aren't macho, stupid?"

"Oh, really? Then what about Detective Orcot, huh? What do you have to say to that?"

"…"

"You have nothing to say! Gwa ha ha ha ha! And the Great, Magnificent Bakura prevails in the end!"

"Actually, I was too captivated by the spinach in between your two front teeth to listen to what you were saying. I really hope it wasn't anything important… and knowing you, it probably wasn't."

"I have spinach on my teeth?!" Bakura shrieked. "Where's a mirror? Somebody give me a mirror!"

"There's a mirror on the ceiling of Mariku's and Malik's bedroom," Anzu said helpfully.

"Ha ha! Like I'd go in there!... HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?!"

"I was cleaning it for them earlier today," Anzu said. "With Windex… did you know that Windex kills ants?"

"Didn't the Windex drip on the bed, since the mirror is on the ceiling?" Bakura asked, spinach momentarily forgotten.

"Yes; it kept falling on Mariku, so they had to go to the kitchen."

Bakura winced. "Eww…"

Anzu grinned evilly at him.

"I bet you enjoyed watching them," Bakura said.

Anzu's smirk grew.

"EWWWWWWWWW!" Bakura yelled, running away from the Anzu as fast as he could. "BAD MENTAL IMAGES!!!"

Bakura finally stopped three blocks away from Mariku's house. He clutched the stitch in his chest, trying to return his breathing to normal.

"…Anzu is a voyeur! …eww. I can't believe I used to live with that chick… nasty."

AN: I'm sorry it took so long! …I had a block and stuff… and the chapter stopped being fun so I couldn't write it, but then I decided to finish the chapter at all costs!

And to the person who asked: mou is a word in Japanese, but I don't know what it means. My kitty cat says mou, so I say mou, and then… the characters say mou. Simple, ne? Or maybe just odd…

Review thingy still on. Because it's fun to demand things.