Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ The Bonds that Bind Us ❯ My Place in this World ( Chapter 2 )

Toboe LoneWolf: *waves* Heyla, everyone! So anyway, this chappie is a kind-of sequel of the last one. AU-ish. (Aka, Alternate Universe.) I also feel that I must excuse myself for a chapter that to me, seems to be OOC and kind of cliche-ish. Sorry, guys.

Lyrics in bold this time; and remember, no matter what happens, no matter what it looks like in the beginning, yamis and hikaris will always be together. ^_~

Disclaimer: I don't own YGO or the song "My Place In This World" by Michael W. Smith.
Originially posted on fanfiction.net. Now here on mediaminer because of ff.net's no song lyric policy

My Place In This World

Yami lay in the hot dry sands of Egypt, basking in heat. It was a wonder to him now; that he could finally feel and touch the real world once more.

A few, long, months ago, Yami had offered the three Egyptian god cards and had in return regained his memory and a mortal body. He knew his true name now, but he still liked the one Yugi had given him: Yami. Yes, he was now separate from Yugi, able to interact in this realm for a second time. It was something Yami had dreamed of and yet dreaded.

Yami rolled over. But what was the point of him living again? What did the gods want with him serving another life here?

The wind is moving
But I am standing still
A life of pages
Waiting to be filled

Bakura wandered around the desert sands. He had no idea of where he was going or what he was doing. Bakura collapsed into a sand dune, weakly sinking his fist into the relentless sand.

So much had happened in that short time. So much had been lost. When that stupid Pharaoh decided to regain his memory, everything had changed. Games had been played, blood shed, and Bakura's purpose of remaining on this earth floated away. And then the Ra-cursed gods thought it would be fun to make the King of Thieves live again, when all he wanted to die.

He had lost it all. And now the gods were taunting him, making him suffer for another lifetime. He raised up his hands and screamed.

"What is the point!?!?!"

A heart that's hopeful
A head that's full of dreams
But this becoming
Is harder than it seems

Yami closed his eyes, remembering that sad day when he had left Yugi. After the separation, Yami had felt an urge to discover the meaning of the memories he had. He had to see for himself, had to walk onto the lands of Egypt once more. There must be a reason for why he was living again. It was somewhere out there, waiting, and he had to find it. Yugi, however, had to stay in school. And so Yami had left alone. The parting between him and Yugi still echoed within Yami's memory.

"Bye, mou hitori no boku." Yugi sobbed into Yami's real, live, breathing, beating chest. Yugi knew that Yami had to leave, but he still didn't like the idea. And yet, he knew that sometimes you have to let go of the things you love best.

This was one of those times.

Yami tightened his arms around Yugi, patting his head. "Goodbye, little light. I'll be back. I just need to think for a while."

"Promise you'll come back?"

Yami smiled and looked down. "Of course I'll come back. To the home I love best."

Yugi grinned. "Right. And I'll be here. Always."

Yami ruffled Yugi's spiky hair. "That's right, little brother."

Yami smiled sadly at what he had said long ago. Little brother. That was what Yugi was to him, and yet, it was something a bit deeper than that. They were still two parts of a soul, two alike beings. One dark, one light, and the two somehow still connected.

And now, in Egypt, Yami still had not found what he was searching for. It was like Yami was always searching for something, always reaching for something just out of touch. Now, with a second life, Yami had to find a reason to live again. Why had the gods granted him another life?

Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world

Not a lot to lean on
I need Your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

Bakura gave up his cry of despair and took great, heaving gasps of air. Nothing. He was nothing again. Even with a mortal body, he was nothing. There just wasn't a reason to live again. Before he had revenge. That had obviously failed. So now what? Why was he here?

Bakura's mind drifted off towards Ryou. He wondered how Ryou was doing without him. Instantly Bakura berated himself for actually caring about his former vessel. He didn't need a vessel anymore, didn't need to care about his physical well-being anymore, didn't have to worry if someone would find out about the bruises and scars -- scars that Bakura inflicted -- would be found out.

Bakura snarled and slammed his fist into the hot sand. Curse that Ryou! Why did that boy have to haunt his thoughts? Why did he constantly have to think about the light-headed fool?

Except that was what Ryou was. The Light.

And for some unknown reason, Bakura still thought of Ryou that way. As his Light. As his hikari.

Slumping into the sand, Bakura wondered if maybe, by some weird, twisted, gods-cursed way, Ryou missed him. Bakura thought back to the day he had left…

Bakura was ransacking the house in one of his increasingly more frequent rages. "By Ra! I don't know why I stay here! I hate this place, I hate the people around here, and I especially hate you!"

Ryou uncurled from his protective position in the corner. "But… why?"

Bakura continued to rant. "It's all your fault! I could have defeated the pharaoh! I could have won it all! And then you had to intrude in my life! I think Yami had the right idea of leaving this Ra-blasted place! Why can't I just leave everything behind!?!"

"Then go!!" Ryou stood up and yelled. "Leave!"

Bakura stared in shock.

Ryou continued to yell, tears streaming down his face. He had hit his breaking point. "You don't care anymore! You don't have a point of staying here anymore! So if you're going to rant about it, then leave!"

Bakura glared back. "Fine! I will!" He stalked out the doorway.

Ryou yelled at Bakura's hardened shoulders. "And don't come back until you find a reason for coming back!"

Bakura opened his eyes and saw a lone hawk circle around upon the heat thermals above the hot desert sands. Alone, like him…

But maybe Ryou would help him find the reason. But how was that possible? He couldn't go back, and he wanted to go back…

Bakura got up and began trudging through the sands again. He needed something to do, and getting sand in his shoes was at least something he could do and curse at. Bakura wandered the desert again, looking for something to do. Anything to keep his mind off of the sappy stuff that he had previously been thinking about. It didn't work.

But why should Ryou even care? Bakura berated himself. Why should he even care? Bakura had never done anything for Ryou. Besides, maybe this was the gods' punishment; that he should wander the earth, forever seeking and never attaining. Perhaps this was his punishment…

Bakura looked up at the night sky and whispered, "Are you still there, Ryou? Do you even remember? Do you remember the sky? Do you remember that day?"

The last words barely came out of his mouth. "Do you remember…me?"

If there are millions
Down on their knees
Among the many
Can you still hear me

Yami stared up into the sky. Maybe Yugi was looking up there too, at the same place.

Yami closed his eyes. He had wandered these desert sands like he had wandered his soulroom, never knowing the reason of existing yet again. He didn't even have a reason, except to protect and guide Yugi. But now, in a mortal body, that reason didn't exist anymore.

Wistfully, Yami whispered, "Are you there, Yugi? Are you still waiting?"

Yami traced hieroglyphics in the sand. "Where should I be? Where do I belong?" The symbol of the double crown formed itself in the sand. "Am I the Pharaoh still? Or is there something else stored for me?"

Hear me asking
Where do I belong
Is there a vision
That I can call my own

Bakura found his face meeting sand for the fiftieth time. Snarling, Bakura wrenched himself upright.

"That's it! I am getting out of here!"

The words struck Bakura. Out of here, great. But where?

Home.

That too, stuck Bakura. Where in Ra's name were these sappy things coming from? The sand must be drying up his head.

Where Ryou is.

Okay, that was it. This stupid "conscience" thing that mortal bodies had was really bugging Bakura. He was not a romantic fool thinking of home and its happy-go-lucky warmth. He was Bakura, King of Thieves!

And the yami of Ryou.

Well, that was nice. Still, the yami of Ryou? He was mortal now, separate! Ryou had no connection whatsoever to himself!

"Mou hitori no boku."

What the heck was that?!? Ryou was speaking to him? In his mind?!? Bakura screamed at the voice inside his head.

"Get out of my head!!!"

"Tomb robber?!?"

"What the--" The face of Yami popped up over the sand dune. Bakura's mouth dropped open. "Pharaoh?!?"

"Tomb robber, what are you doing here?" Yami asked sensibly.

Bakura kicked at the sand. "Nothing. I needed to get away from Ryou. What are you doing here?"

Yami sighed. "I don't know. I hoped that Egypt would give me the answers but--"

"Answers to what?" Bakura interrupted. He plopped down next to Yami.

Yami fingered the Puzzle around his neck. "Why I'm here. Why I'm still living. What's the point of living. You know, the meaning of life."

Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world

"Wow. Deep thoughts, pharaoh." Bakura sneered. Inwardly, Bakura was in shock. Those were the exact things he had been thinking about! He shifted his seat. "What did you think it means?"

Yami shook his head. "That's just it. I don't know. I mean, I used to, but--"

"Then what did it used to mean?" Bakura ran his fingers through the sand.

Yami wistfully looked to the east. "Being the aibou of Yugi. Being his guide, his protector. Being his mou hitori no boku."

"Is that what you were muttering about?" Bakura let the sand slide through the cracks in his hands.

"Yes." Yami answered simply.

"What's wrong with that? Seems fine with me."

"But Yugi doesn't need that anymore. Besides, we're mortal now. It's not the same."

"Ever heard of bodyguards?"

Yami stared at Bakura incredulously. "Body…guards?"

Bakura shrugged. "What, the shrimp needs one. Who says you can't be one as well? And bodyguards can be lots of other things too. Teacher, guide…" He dropped his hands. "…friends."

"Ah."

"It's where you belong, anyway." Bakura remarked off-handedly. "Egypt isn't the same anymore."

Where you belong.

The words echoed through Yami's mind. Then it suddenly struck him -- home is where Yami belonged. Home. He had to be back home, where Yugi was, and family, and his friends, and where he belonged. There he had a reason to live; there he had his newfound family. There he had a place in this world. Because it was home.

"Pharaoh? You in there?" Bakura waved his hands in front of Yami's face.

Yami shook his head. "I'm fine." Yami turned his head towards Bakura. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

Yami poked Bakura. "What's your point in life?"

Bakura rubbed the back of his neck. "Dunno. Stealing the stitches off everyone. Making everyone's life a living Hell. Revenge. You know, the works."

"The same thing, then." Yami turned over on his side to face Bakura. "And that's how it should be. Our point in life shouldn't change." Yami raised an eyebrow. "Although from your description, perhaps it should."

"Oh goodie. Elucidate me." Bakura waved dramatically.

"It's like you said. My purpose when I was just a spirit is the same as now when I'm mortal. Even the names are the same. 'Aibou' doesn't change whether you're immortal or not. I'm still Yugi's mou hitori no boku; my personality didn't change. And even 'hikari' is the same, because Yugi will always be that way, my little Light." Yami looked up at the stars. "And if those are the same, my purpose is the same -- to protect my aibou, hikari, and mou hitori no boku."

"Huh." Bakura huffed.

Yami rolled over. "It works for you too."

"What?!?"

"Think about it." Yami yawned. "You were a spirit too. You protected Ryou, who was your aibou, your hikari. You were his mou hitori no boku. Granted you also had some other agendas," Bakura growled, but Yami continued, "But while those agendas failed, these stayed the same. You will always be the yami of Ryou."

The yami of Ryou.

The words echoed through Bakura's mind. Was that true? Did that bond hold through immortality? Was that his point in life? Was he still the yami, the protector and darkness of Ryou? Somehow Bakura agreed. Especially with the darkness part. Someone had to give Ryou a bit of reality now and then. And Bakura was definitely not going to let the pharaoh's pet do that!

Bakura grunted. "Whoop-de-do. Wow Pharaoh, we've found the meaning of life: to hover over little lightbulbs!"

Yami smiled. "I suppose we have."

Bakura heaved himself up from the sand and put his hands on his hips. "Well, what are we waiting for?"

Yami cocked his head. "Waiting for what?"

Bakura rolled his eyes. "To go home! How else can we protect and guide our hikaris?"

Yami's eyes brightened. Ah, home. "Yes. Let's go home."

Not a lot to lean on
I need Your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

And so the yamis turned their attention to the east. They had finally found a reason, inside their hearts. Back home. Back to their hikaris and their life. Back to where they had began, because that is how beginnings end.