Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ The Pharaoh's New Robes ❯ One-Shot

This is such a dumb idea. I just got this idea of a parody of tales when I was in a library, and I saw some old fairy tale / moral books. It's set in Ancient Egypt, mind you, but Yugi's in it. Or whatever. Yami (the Pharaoh) is a bit OOC.

A parody of "The Emperor's New Clothes!" … hm.

The Pharaoh's New Robes

Once upon a time there was a Pharaoh in Egypt who was very vain. He loved clothes, and he had more garments than anyone else in the realm. The Pharaoh spent almost all his time trying on new clothes and fabrics, and looking into mirrors [1].

The Pharaoh's vanity was well-known throughout the land of Egypt. Many citizens thought he was quite mad to spend so much time wearing fancy clothes and admiring himself in mirrors, but no-one said anything, for he was, after all, the Pharaoh, beloved of the gods. (Also, he would probably execute them in a rather unpleasant way, and nobody really wanted that to happen to them.)

Soon, two thieves heard of this Pharaoh's obsession, and made up a plan to make themselves rich. Who wouldn't?

The thieves pretended to be traveling tailors and went to the Pharaoh's palace. They were admitted into the Pharaoh's presence.

Introducing themselves as Baku-re and Malek, they announced that they alone had special fabric, of the best quality, that was not only wonderful, but magical, too.

"Only the wisest and most loyal (to Egypt and the Pharaoh) people will be able to see this fabric," they claimed. "It will not be visible to those who are fools, traitors, and weaklings."

When the thieves opened up their bags, the Pharaoh leaned forward, but saw nothing. Why, I must either be a fool or a weakling! he thought to himself. Embarrassed, he covered up his discomfiture by saying, "that…is the most… magnificent fabric I have ever seen!"

The Pharaoh asked his priests what they thought of the magic fabric. They couldn't see anything, but they did not want anyone to think that they were stupid or feeble, and so they exclaimed, "It is quite extraordinary! What amazing fabric!"

Knowing his priest were no fools, the Pharaoh thought the fabric must be real, even though he could not see it. He offered the thieves two hundred gold pieces and a portion of land to make new robes for him.

Grinning, Baku-re and Malek winked at each other slyly as they left the room.

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After a few weeks, the thieves brought the Pharaoh his new robes. The Pharaoh put it on slowly, being careful not to snag the fine stitching he couldn't see. Then he strutted around the room. He had never felt so stylish!

"These are truly the finest robes I have ever worn," the Pharaoh bragged to his priests. "Tell me, what do you think of it?"

The priests looked at each other, then the priest Mahado[2] spoke up.

"If you are happy, then we are happy, my Pharaoh," answered Priest Mahado. The others muttered their agreement. In truth, they were anything but happy. In their eyes, the Pharaoh was standing in front of a mirror without anything on [3], admiring robes that weren't even there!

The Pharaoh, arrogant and bigheaded as he was, wanted to show off his new robes to everyone in Egypt. He ordered the priests to arrange a royal parade the next day.

"Of course, Your Majesty," said High Priest Setau [4]. "As you wish."

The kingdom was practically buzzing with news and gossip about the parade. Everyone wanted to see the Pharaoh's new, magical fabric. They had heard about their magical qualities, and they wanted to find out who among them was a fool and who was not.

It was the day of the parade! Everyone pushed and shoved to get the best view. But when the Pharaoh appeared in his chariot, everyone was shocked. The Pharaoh was naked [5]!

Nobody could see the Pharaoh's robes, but of course no one wanted to admit this out loud. Instead the people praised him and admired him in loud voices.

Suddenly, from the crowd, a young boy with tricolour hair like the Pharaoh cried out, "The Pharaoh isn't wearing robes! In fact, he isn't wearing anything! What is everyone talking about?"

The people were stunned into silence. Instantly the Pharaoh knew the boy was telling the truth. He realized that he had been an idiot [6] and that he was parading himself throughout the land unclothed. He felt quite stupid.

After the shortened parade, the Pharaoh (humiliated) returned quickly to his palace to actually put on some clothes. He ignored all his fancy things and instead, put on a plain kilt. For the first time, he left his chambers without looking in the mirror. Then he invited the honest young boy to speak with him in his court.

"I now declare you junior advisor," said the Pharaoh. "You have shown me that you were very brave. You alone told me the truth, when no other did," he looked pointedly at the priests. "You will always be one of my most trusted friends."

The boy beamed. "Thank you, Your Majesty," he said. "I will always be honest to you, even if you don't like what I have to say."

"I am counting on it," replied the Pharaoh.

… and the thieves? Let's just say they are living quite comfortably in a neighbouring land… and the neighbouring land also has an emperor who loves clothes…

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-end

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And now a few notes about the tale

[1] I dunno if they had mirrors in Egypt, but oh well…

[2] Yes, a spoiler… don't say I didn't warn you… if you don't know who this is, then, it's just a priest, ok? (to others that know) Shhh!!

[3] You can pick up your jaws and tongues now, fangirls. And please wipe up that drool… ugh…

[4] Seto is more Japanese. Setau is more Egyptian. And if you put two and two together…

[5] AAAHHH!! ( gets mobbed)

[6] Not to mention an asshole…

Thanks for reading my parody! Please review if you liked it! Should I do another chapter? The Honest Woodcutter! I can see it now…

Yami Bakura: I was barely in the story! Oh well, REVIEW, MORTALS!!!!