Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Tourniquet ❯ Tourniquet ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Kaiba has decided to end his pain...but is it what he thought it would be? Will he find his peace? Slight Seto/Joey, character death (suicide) and it's a songfic...please R&R.

Anime/Manga: Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 05.17.2005 | Pages: 3 | Words: 2.0K | Visits: 534 | Status: Completed

Songfic…enjoy

Standard disclaimers apply

Tourniquet

I tried to kill the pain

Lying on the ground I stare up at the stars barely feeling the pain from the wounds in my wrists waiting for the agony inside myself to stop. Waiting for it all to end.

But only brought more

Instead of the peace I had expected, wanted, craved. I felt something break in me, tears burst forth running down my cheeks as thoughts of the people I would be leaving behind fill my head. Yami my nemesis. Mokuba my brother. Joey my one true love. Will they miss me?

I lay dying

I was dying; I knew that, I could feel my lifeblood leaving my body. There was nothing anyone could do to stop that awful fact.

And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal

I don't want to die, but there is nothing I can do to stop it. It's not what it's supposed to be. It's supposed to be the end to everything, no pain, it's supposed to end that. Why am I regretting this? Why do I feel so betrayed?

I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming

Curling up I sob, screaming, nothing can end it, I will feel this for the rest of eternity. It will always be there. Is there no one who can help me? I cry out for the only one who might. Long forgotten prays that I believed useless come from no where, spilling from me to the one above.

Am I too lost to be saved

In the middle of one of my prayers I realize it's fruitless. I am damned. I've taken my life; there is no reason for him to take me in. On a ragged breath I yell to the one who looks down on all of us asking if it is too late? Am I too lost? Can I ever be saved?

Am I too lost?

I whimper this question once more before I start a new prayer, one from me, for me. I cry to him…

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

Drawing a breath I wrap my arms around myself as I feel a bone deep cold settle in.

Do you remember me

The blood is soaking into my clothes and I think back to the time when God had been what had gotten me through everything. The idea that someone had been listening was what I had desperately needed. Swallowing hard I wonder if you even know I exist much less remember me.

Lost for so long

It had been right after my parents had died, I believed there was no way you could possibly be there watching over me, if you were why would you let them die? You took them when I needed them the most. You had abandoned me so I did the same to you and the faith, why did it matter?

Will you be on the other side

Now as I lay here I wonder if when I reach my final destination who will be waiting for me. Will it be you and my parents? Standing there all in white arms open ready to comfort me? Tears would be rolling down their faces as they pulled me into their arms.

Or will you forget me

Or will it be Satan and an eternity of pain and devastation? I can see him clear as day standing in front of me his eyes gleaming. He knows all the horrible things I have done, he won't let me obliterate them from my memory.

I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming

Letting out a howl of fear and agony I try to banish him by starting up your prayer, the words spring to my lips easily but he is not exiled. Instead he comes forth to suck the last drops of blood from my helpless body.

Am I too lost to be saved

Moaning in horror and fright I wonder why it is you won't help me. Have I not suffered enough? Have I not begged enough?

Am I too lost

Feeling his icy hand grasp my arm and pull it up I hear this question in my mind as his cold lips caress my open wrist. Throwing my head back I shout my prayer to you again.

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

I shudder no longer in control of my body closing my eyes to block it all out.

My wounds cry for the grave

My life has almost finished being drained and I know there is not long.

My soul cries for deliverance

Still as I lay here with the knowledge I will be dragged to the pits of hell I hear the child in my wanting to understand why he hasn't been saved. Why can't I be saved? What did I do wrong?

Will I be denied Christ

I feel myself being detached from my mortal body and I understand finally that I will never go to where I want.

Tourniquet

He can't stop the pain or my death. He can't do anything.

My suicide

R&R