Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Transexual Transylvania ❯ The Exorcists ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimers: OK, the same old story again... I don't have any rights on Yugioh or any other mentioned, products, areas or characters mentioned here. Any resemblances to existing persons are pure accidental and not intended. No copyright infringement intended!

Genre: Romance/Humor/Horror-Parody

Pairing: Bakura/Ryou, Seto/Malik and possibly some more...

Summary: After receiving an invitation to a party at Count Dracula´s castle, Bakura and Seto, exorcists extraordinaire, decide to dress out as monsters and raid the castle.... -not quite getting what they hoped for. Starring: A not-so-holy exorcist named Touzoku-ou Bakura, a male Banshee with a lack of self-confidence, a sultry succubus that's trying to prove that he can seduce absolutely ANYBODY and a fake vampire (aka. the exorcists partner) that proves that icicles can be reincarnated as humans!

Picaro: In response of Saihitei´s dare! *smirks psychotically* You really shouldn't have added that ´no other conditions´ M-chan!!

Dare: A Bakura/Ryou story with hints of mild lemon, no other conditions.

1: The Exorcists

Transylvania. A much-famed land in Rumania, known for being rough as a region and possessing even more rough inhabitants...Lord Dracula, for example.

"-and why NOT, may I ask you?!"

#Ramnikul, Transylvania.#

Several citizens of the usually calm city stopped in their daily routines, shaken from the loud scream that had just ripped the air. Noting the suddenly lack in any movement, the tall brunette man let out a little sigh, shaking his head in disapproval.

"Because you, my dear Bakura, wouldn't know the meaning of the word ´inconspicuous´ and if it´d jump right onto the tip of your nose and do a step-dance there. As you just effectively proved."

The last comment was accompanied with a flat look, and a light nod of his head, indicating at their still frozen-silent surroundings. The man he was talking to didn't seem to be fazed at all. Giving his companion a fierce glare that was able to intimidate most of Transylvania's undead-population, Bakura let out a low growl. Everybody else would have been scared and just given the white-haired ruffian his will, but not his brunette partner. Oh no, not Seto Kaiba! Letting one of the corners of his lips twitch up in a lightly amused expression, Seto´s calm blue eyes met Bakura´s fierce ones glares coolly.

Realizing that his glares were getting wasted on his companion, the white-haired exorcist let out a loud growl. Turning his attention to much more grateful victims (speak, the still ogling townsfolk) the smaller undead-hunter snarled.

"WHAT?!?! DID YOU NEVER BEFORE SEE TWO EXORCISTS HAVE AN ARGUMENT?! GET GOING!!"

The spell was immediately broken. Watching the formerly curious crowd scramble away from them and back to whatever they were doing before Bakura´s first outburst not without a certain amount of amusement, the icy-blue eyed brunette shook his head again. Giving his ill-tempered team-mate a level glance, he murmured. "What was to be proved."

That comment earned him another fierce glance from Bakura (that was promptly ignored again.)

Crossing his arms angrily in front of his black-cloth chest, Bakura seized Seto with another wild glare. "So you don't think that I could do it undercover."

The blue-eyed brunette smirked lightly. "Actually, Bakura, I don't think you could do any mission undercover, not just this one." Seeing his friend immediately bristle up again at his comment, Seto laughed in his low voice. "Your temper is simply too fierce. You'd end up bloody massacring the first one who just dares to voice a doubt on the genuineness of your cover."

"I was good enough to pull that drunken-lovers stand with you the other time." Bakura all but pouted at him. Seeing this, the brunette couldn't held but chuckle again. Seeing a man who had made his mark in life as clearly as Bakura Touzoku-ou had acting so childish simply amused him.

"Yeah, but back then we were playing to get that Lich out of it's hide. It doesn't take much to play somebody drunken enough to not even notice if they'd snug now another man, a woman, a horse or a log of wood." He reminded his companion and fellow hunter of the supernatural with a light, sly grin. Bakura simply continued with his glares. "So you're expecting us to simply pass up an opportunity like that?"

Seto sighed internally. Bakura could be so stubborn when he wanted too! (Not to mention that the brunette was just as viciously head-strong himself) Inwardly, he couldn't help but contemplate what a strange sight they two had to be. Two of the holy orders most successful (and devastating - They always left their battlefields in shambles; not accounting if it was the monsters doing or theirs.) exorcists, in all their black-clothed glory, standing in middle of the streets and fighting like little children... Good that their superiors couldn't see that. If he thought about it, it was good that they didn't know most of their activities.

(Otherwise they'd been booted out of the order at least three times... Both, Seto and Bakura had been disastrous in their ways of exorcising before they were paired up as a field team. - Now it was often that they caused more damages in a single hunt than the monster they hunted had in all it's time together.;)

"Seto!"

The brunette in question jerked lightly, his attention returning back to his distressed team-mate. If possible, Bakura now glared even more. The albino couldn't stand his partner blacking out on him like that. Crumbling the parchment they'd been fighting over for the past half hour in his fist, he waved his other arm wildly, emphasizing his point.

"How long have we waited for something like this? It's practically a direct invitation right into their heart! We can't pass up a chance like this!!"

Seto watched him with a blank stare. "Of course we can." Bakura jumped a little. Why couldn't that stubborn idiot see his point?! Somehow he had to make him see his point...

"Look, Seto, this is our chance! Everybody will be there. The Count, Frankenstein, just everybody... The crème de la crème! Surely there's one or the other undead on which's head's a reward you'd like to get your fingers on..."

Seto still looked disapproving of the whole idea.

"Bakura - We'd be going right into the middle of a whole nest of legendary immortals."

Bakura blinked, defiantly.

"So what? It's not like we didn't do that already before."

Heaving a sigh, Seto shook his head. So slowly he was getting tired of this argument.

"The difference is that we're not talking about our common, everyday undeads. We're talking about going straight into Count Dracula's castle, for god's sake! He's not any vampire, he's the ultimate vampire lord! Not to mention all the other high-class enemies there..."

"So you're suddenly chicken, aren't you? Now, where it's getting dangerous!" Bakura sneered.

"BAKURA-!!"

Within seconds the arrogant exorcist was finding himself hanging in the air, only suspended by the brunette's hand that had a tight grip on his shirts collar. Narrowing his reddish-brown eyes at Seto, he hissed. "What?! Sensible towards hearing the truth? Admit it Seto, if the risk's low, then you're all powerful. But as soon as is might get a tiny bit dangerous you're backing down! -Ow!!"

Rubbing his sore rear, he glared defiantly up to meet his friends enraged eyes. He didn't bother to attempt to stand up from where the brunette had forcefully thrown him to the ground, knowing better than that. It would high probably only gain him a painful kick into the rips. Seto was like that. Being usually rather calm-tempered to an almost stoic amount, the icy blue-eyed one was known and feared within their order for being just as cruel and vicious (if not more) than the monster they usually hunted, when provoked.

A rule that didn't exclude any of his partners, as the white-haired ex-thief had soon learned after their first encounter.

Snagging the lightly ragged document from Bakura´s hand, the brunette quickly skimmed over it, before giving Bakura a disdainful look. Bakura glared right back. For a few moments they held their gazes like that, then Seto snorted, jerking his head away.

"Party at Castle Dracuul... That's is down-right suicide, you know that, don't you? "He threw his hands up into the air. "But fine, let's go there!! You already made up your mind! I'll laugh when your cover gets blown and they rip you into bloody pieces. "

Breaking into a bright smirk, Bakura quickly scrambled up from the floor after hearing that. Giving Seto a partner-ly pat on his shoulder (he had to actually reach up to reach it), he grinned victoriously.

"Don't worry, partner! I won't let it come that far!"

Having a sigh under his breath, Seto removed his hand. "You know, whenever you say something like that, it usually only ends up worse..."

Muttering under his breath about stupid, battle-rabid albinos, he started heading towards the inn they had taken residence in, not waiting for his white-haired companion to follow him. Blinking after him, Bakura shouted.

"Oi! Seto! Where are you going? The castle's the other way!!"

Turning around, Seto gave him an exhausted look.

"To the inn. Knowing our luck and your sense for tact, we'll need all the preparations we can get. And also it's just starting after nightfall." With that, he turned and left Bakura to himself.

Said exorcist grinned. Taking himself a minute for dusting off the dirt of his clothes, he quickly followed after his brunette partner in crime; err...exorcism, not bothering for the document he'd been clutching so fervently a short times before.

......

Anybody who would have bothered to still read it, would have been shocked by it's contents. It wasn't only a document. It was a invitation.

From Count Dracula to ´who-every reads this´ to a party in his castle.

Only condition:

You had to be a monster.

---Chapter 1 End---

©by Picaro