Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ What happened, What will happen with my love ❯ what? ( Chapter 1 )

`I have to make the pain of this real. I just can't stand this invisible enemy any longer I have to see it.' I turn and pick up the razor I hadn't done this in so long but the scars are still there. `How can something this painful not show up until you make it appear?' `I feel so weak, ever since it happened I haven't felt happy, All I've felt was this pain and when I realized what had happened that day my heart broke into a thousand tiny pieces and then it broke even more when he didn't come back.' I hade begun to make the shallow cut on my arm and I started to feel the pain of the self-inflicted cut. I realized it was nothing compared to how I felt inside. I began to cut deeper until I was bleeding severely and that's when I saw that day agin. `So much blood, but I won't cry.'

Flash back:

"INUYASHA!" I screamed while I ran forward. It had really happened. "So much blood, why is there so much blood." It was like a trance nothing could pull me out… until I heard it, it was the sound of his voice. `It's so soothing; it's the only thing that could ever make me feel any better after this.'

"Kagome listen to me, I really need you to listen ok. I have to tell you something very important that I've known about for a long time but haven't been able to tell you. I…I love you. I don't mean how I loved Kikyo I really love you. I would do anything for you, and that is why I don't want to leave you so much. I'm really sorry I didn't tell you this before because if you had known maby we could have been together, but I didn't so now I have to pay for it with my life. I never want you to feel like your alone, and whatever you do don't ever let someone hurt you. Please don't hate me for telling you these things, because I fell like I'm dying when you hate me.

By that time I felt like my heart was being ripped out and stomped on I loved him to and now he was going to die right after he had told me, it wasn't fair. "Inuyasha I love you to more than you know and I could never hate you. I love you too much to ever hate you." "You have to hang on for me ok. If you leave me now I'll die to, because I don't think I could ever really live without you.

" Kagome listen to me I just… I just want you to be happy, because that's always how I've felt just by being around you. I don't want you to cry for me, I don't want you to grieve. If I wanted you to do those things I would be like Kikyo. I want you to be strong. Please be strong…for me." Right after he said this his eyes took on a sort of glazed look and his head felt slightly more heavy in her lap.

He can't be gone, he's all I have left, he the only one left who loved me and now he's gone." I felt tears fall down my eyes and suddenly everything he just said hit me, and it was the hardest blow I had ever taken, of that I am sure. He told me he loved me but he doesn't want me to cry. All he wants is for me to be happy. I know I can't be happy but I won't be weak anymore. I won't cry…never again. I will be strong…for him, the one I love.

End flashback:

`From that day on I had never cried, not once, no matter how much pain I was in. I don't ever want to let him down, I can't.'

I knew that I had become distant, to everyone but my kit. Shippo was the only joy I had left in my life, he was the only one I ever allowed my self to actually keep the closeness I had established from the beginning. He was the only one I let myself love.

I had lost everyone but him in the battle with Naraku. Everyone I loved had been ripped away from me without any warning and I remember how much pain, and anger, and hate I had felt. It was the first time I had ever hated anything. It was the first time I did not feel useless.

Flashback: (on the battlefield) Sango was the first to fall, She had been fighting a tiger demon when another demon came from behind her and sliced her stomach, after that she had been weak enough for the first demon to take down, and so she was killed right in front of everyone. Once Miroku found out Sango was dead he opened his kazzana, which had been useless thanks to the hell insects, he had been killed by the poison after taking out about 300 of the insects, he stumbled over to Sango and with what was left of his strength pulled her body into a tight embrace and held her while he died.

" How could you do this, how, you have taken away almost Everything that is important to me in this battle, you are truly the worst thing I have ever had the displeasure to meet."

While I spoke this, my voice had started out weak and broken but once I came to feel what all this meant it became determined and strong."

"I will kill you, you are everything I hate, and have taken everything I love besides Inuyasha. You don't deserve to live, even I can't save people past a certain point, I must rid this world of you for you no longer belong."

I felt myself becoming stronger with every passing word and I knew my aura was become wilder and more powerful also, but I didn't care anymore, nothing mattered but to kill the one who caused me so much pain that I felt like I couldn't breath, that I felt like I would die, that I wanted to die.

`I have to take my revenge, if not for me than at least for Sango and Miroku, they would not want me to give up, and I won't, I won't let them down just because there gone.'

Suddenly a tentacle came out of Naraku's arm and I felt the anger become even stronger inside me. ` This man has killed countless amounts of people for his entertainment, he has made people believe they had been betrayed by the one's they love, he has turned innocent people into impure beings of hate and distrust, this man has made love a sick game, this man has changed everything with just one thought, even me. With each passing moment of time that I was on this journey I never really noticed how weak I was, how weak just making me feel made me. I always wondered how Sesshomaru could be so cold, but now I know, he was being strong, I won't become emotionless, but I will be stronger, I will do it for everyone's life this man has destroyed, including mine.

I rose my hand with just one thought in my mind, this man will die, today. When the tentacle came within a ten-foot radius I sent out a very tine wave of purification, I wanted him to suffer just like I had, to slowly die one piece at a time.

It was enough to burn and eventually dissolve his tentacle all the way up to his arm, and render it useless. Naraku screamed out in agony and it was the first time Kagome heard him actually scream, but she had blood-rage and all she wanted was revenge.

She sent another small wave of purification at his leg while he was off guard and another scream of agony was unleashed when Naraku's leg slowly disintegrated before all to see.

It wasn't enough I still wanted more, I wanted him to suffer more I want him to feel true sorrow, I wanted to make him want to die.

I was so focused on Naraku and causing him pain that I failed to notice when Kikyo went up to Inuyasha and they started a fight to the death. He had told me the day before how he had never really loved her, how they were just two lonely people who wanted someone to be with, and if they couldn't trust each other then they really didn't deserve someone to be with. He sounded like he finally understood what had truly happened to Kikyo and himself. He finally found out that guilt was the only thing that brought him back to Kikyo time and time again.

I heard a cry to my left and finally realized that Inuyasha was about to loose to Kikyo he already taken a deep gash to his shoulder from a nonpurified arrow and a scratch on his leg from a purified one. He was starting to move slower, with less grace, and had started to breathe faster and harder. He was going to die if she didn't do something.

Suddenly Kikyo shot a purified arrow directly into his heart, he started to stumble back but then seemed to regain his balance even though a blind man could recognize his pain.

"Ki…Kikyo why? I don't understand. Inuyasha whimpered out through his pain.

I had my back turned on Naraku and then my eyes fixed on Kikyo as her maniacal laughter rang out through the now eerie silence that had come to pass.

It was her turn now she would pay then Naraku will be next.