Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Alone ❯ wretched memories ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.

A/N: This is a fic I wrote a long time ago, that I recently revised. I hope you will like it. I'm sorry the first chapter is so pathetic, it gets better as it goes. KK? Please enjoy.

I lifted myself off the hard, concrete seat of the stadium, my face serene, but buried in seriousness and worry.
"Alright! What an excellent show of blood, people! I love it! This means that the Toguro-gumi will advance to the next round!" cried Koto into the microphone excitedly, arousing cheers from the demonic audience.
My face deepened in anxiousness. That means...we're next.
Karasu swept a long strand of smooth black hair behind his shoulder, and returned to his team.
...against them. Turning away, I pushed some of my own, red hair behind my ear, and exited the stadium into the surrounding forest, placid and untouched by the evil of the Makai. ...we'll...probably die next round. I can tell Yusuke to be strong however much I want, but even he knows I'm lying. Toguro's power is overwhelming...Yusuke can't take it...especially after the loss of Genkai-basaan...
I sighed, thowing my head back and allowing the sunlight to splash on it and warm it.
'Then...it's time I told him.'
'Him' was Hiei, the Jaganshi I had loved silently for so long. He didn't know, of course, and I preferred it that way...but if the end was near...
'If we're going to die...then...I want him to die knowing I love him,' I told myself firmly. I didn't care if he turned me down, or if he avoided me. Actually, if he did, it wouldn't have been a surprise. But that was Hiei, still corrupted by his past as the Forbidden Child...
A shadow overpassed me, and my eyes opned 'opened, when had they been closed?', taking in my sights. I neared a small clearing, one occupied by the holder of my affections.
I lifted a hand. "Hiei --!"

"Haa--!" Kurama gasped, jumping up in surprise. The darkness of the room surrounded him, and he blinked as his evergreen eyes, taking it all in. Pushing his white, tangled comforter off he stumbled out of bed, staggering to the kitchen where he poured himself a glass of water and gulped it vigorously.
'That was two years ago, Kurama, get over it...'
That seemed to ball his conscience told him for so long now: Get over it, it's in the past, don't think about it...at the same time it was asking the impossible. How could Kurama forget when everything he held precious, namely Hiei, was ripped from his grasp and held so far away that he could never reach it again...?
His knees weakened, and he sank to the floor, his glass clinking against the shelf.
-Hiei turned to him, his crimson eyes widened in surprise. "What do you want, Kurama?" he asked quietly in his casual tone, one Kurama drank in all too happily...-
-"I--," Kurama stammered, tucking his hand behind him nervously. "I just wanted to talk..."=
'No! Gods, why can't I forget about this...?' Kurama grasped his head, messing his hair, as if threatening a nasty headache. 'Why...why...' Opening his eyes slowly, he glanced at the clock. '3 o'clock...dammit...this has been happening too much...'
This was Kurama life nowadays, forever contemplating the past, every day living his life in a dark mist of sorrow.
Since that day at the Dark Tournament, Kurama had lived a secluded life, leaving the Urameshi-gumi after beating Toguro half-heartedly. Nothing had seemed important anymore, but then, why would it... -"Hai?" Hiei asked, his eyes narrowing. Kurama approached him him awkwardly, seating himself in the dry grass.-
-"I-it's a beautiful day, isn't it?" he responded slowly, gazing into the blue heavens. Hiei did the same, smirking slightly, nodding his head in silent agreement.-
-"You're worried about beating Toguro, aren't you?" Hiei remarked quietly.-
-"I suppose you could say that..." Kurama turned to him, his evergreen eyes shining.-
-"We may not make it and die like dogs right there. Not even confidence can save us. Now, above anything else, the only thing will help us win is..."-
-"...power..." Kurama finished. "But...I suppose there's more..."-
-"Like what, Kurama?"-
-"Well, I suppose...fighting for something..."- Kurama admitted the idea rather shyly.-
-"That is a mere distraction," Hiei replied quickly, closing his eyes and crossing his arms. "When you are fighting your mind must focused on killing your opponent and nothing else."-
-"...would you fight for Yukina?"-
-Hiei's eyes snapped open.-
-"If your fight depended on her would you fight for her, Hiei?" Kurama asked, turning to him.-
-"I...I..." he stammered. "...hai," he replied after a long pause. "I would fight for Yukina."
-"Power corrupts without humanity, Hiei, even baka ningen know that." Kurama grinned.-
-"And who would you fight for, kitsune?"-
-"D-demo, I--"-
Even the most malicious of youkai would easily tell that Hiei was able to show some compassion, to his sister, namely. Family love. But did he understand real love, the kind that Koorime were forbidden to know, the kind that had created himself and Yukina...?
...no.
-"Well?" Hiei continued.-
-"I...suppose...I would fight for....you, Hiei."-
Kurama would never forget the look that had come across the jaganshi's face, a mix of anger and confusion that Kurama had feared...
-"Na...ni?"-
-Trepidity boiled in Kurama, and he pushed himself up, nearing his face to Hiei's. "...ai shiteru, Hiei.."-
The youko grimaced, he should have known better than to tell Hiei those words...after all, he was speaking to Hiei, the Forbidden Child.
He stood slowly, walking to his room once again, and straightening the sheets.
While they were fighting their opponents, Hiei had ignored Kurama at all costs, and once the Toguro-gumi had falllen, Hiei announced his plans, not to Kurama but to Yukina of couse, who told everyone after.
-"He's leaving for the Makai...to train, and he says he might not come back..."-
Kurama remembered only too well how everything within him seemed to stop at those words... he had rushed to the stadium's exit, only to see Hiei fading into the outside light. Once Kurama had reached the forest...
...he was gone.
folding himself into the sheets, Kurama grimaced.
He had caused Hiei to leave...and the last he ever saw of him...
...was the Jagainshi turning his back on him.

There was a loud crinkling as Kurama dumped the contents of his grocery bags onto the counters. The gallon of milk toppled over, bursting its cap and spilling its liquid on the floor.
"Kuso!" Kurama cursed, nimbly grabbing the carton and putting it upright. Quickly pulling some sheets of paper towels he wiped up the mess.
-Knock knock-
Kurama snarled slightly, wiping up the liquid as quickly as he could, hearing the knocking grow louder and impatient. The doorknob squeaked loudly as he pulled it open...
"Oi! You are hard to track down!" Yusuke said cheerily. He was older, true, though he still resembled the fourteen-year old Yusuke Kurama had known; His hair was gelled up, his eyes brown, wide, and rebellious and his face tanned from days spent in the city sun.
Kurama smiled in surprise. "Y-Yusuke! I--ano, come in!" He opened the door invitingly, and Yusuke trudged in. "Would you like anything to eat?"
"No," Yusuke replied casually. "I'm not staying for long. Yukina brought us all some news that I thought you'd like to know." He flopped onto the couch, and soon Kurama joined him, his face anxious. "Demo, Kurama, what have you been up to? Things haven't been the same without you or Hiei, everything's just quiet...normal....almost. Boring..." he added hastily.
"Speak for yourself, I've been living here two years already and I don't know anyone around here--"
"Then come back! You and I could kick some ass with that Rose Whip thingy of yours."
Kurama spoke hastily. "Y-you said you had something to tell me."
"Yeah..." Yusuke sat up quickly, facing the youko with stern eyes and a smirk. "You know how Hiei left two years ago to 'train' in the Makai...?"
Kurama's heart seemed to stop. "...hai...?"
"Well, he's coming back."

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of my fanfic. I'll update as soon as I can.