Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Balance ❯ Take Steps Backwards ( Chapter 22 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Disclaimer: mou. Yes, that's right: mou.

Balance

Chapter Twenty-Two: Take Steps Backwards

You have told me many things before, he returned shortly. Why should I believe you now? Why should I have believed you then?

The man in the mirror smiled to himself. 'I do not need to give you a reason to believe,' he said. 'You do that for yourself. I do not know why you believe, only that you do.'

He tried to scream, but something covered his mouth. What was it? The man in the mirror stood far from him, and he could see the lithe form clearly through this clamp down on his voice. He felt something hot and cool-how was that? Yet it was true, he knew-sliding over his lips and freezing his voice inside itself.

The man in the mirror laughed loudly.

Do not laugh at me! he tried to shout. Do you know what is keeping my voice in? Tell me!

But he could not make noise at all, much less speak.

This tormented hush, this unbearable silence falling over him in waves was excruciating, and he could barely keep himself from tearing out of this world and letting his body fall to oblivion. But he couldn't do that, could he? No, he was trapped, trapped like a fox to a dog, and there was no way out.

The man's echoing chortles tore through him, knives breaking his skin and ripping out his hair, thrashing his body to pieces. He writhed in pain, in this horribly evil torment, but the torture did not end. Could not end? Maybe so. But this was his own mind…there was nothing here but himself. He was killing himself from the inside out.

Then it all came crashing down.

The cool heat liquefied, dripping away and giving him back his voice. The man in the mirror stopped laughing, and suddenly the ground returned. He was sitting on something hard, something solid. Something like a rock. In fact, it was a rock.

He screamed.

DON'T SAY THOSE THINGS! he shouted. Tears formed in his eyes and he could feel them. DO NOT TELL ME I AM WRONG! DO NOT TELL ME WE ARE ALL THE SAME! I AM MYSELF AND YOU CANNOT TAKE THAT FROM ME!

All the while, the man in the mirror sat back and watched. A small smile danced across his face.

MY FRIENDS ARE KIND PEOPLE! he began again. The man's smile only fueled his rage. THEY WILL NOT BE TAINTED BY ME BECAUSE I WILL NOT ALLOW THEM TO BE! I WILL WATCH THEM AND I WILL ALLOW THEM TO STAY PURE!

The man in the mirror stood and stalked over to him.

'Listen to yourself,' he said quietly. 'Listen to your words, to your screams, to your tirades, and then tell me I am wrong. Then tell me you are alone.'

The man held his shoulders and locked him in place on the rock.

'You are not alone. You have never been alone. Take steps backwards and you will see.

'You are a fool.

'See it all.'

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"So where are we going again?" Yuusuke asked casually.

Kuwabara turned on him. "I thought you memorized the coordinates!"

"Eheh…"

Kurama and Hiei stopped momentarily, waiting for the two friends to sort out their differences. After a long minute, Kurama leaned down to whisper in Hiei's ear.

"When do you think they'll remember that Yuusuke wrote down the coordinates?"

Hiei shrugged. "Or that neither of them know what the coordinates mean, anyway," he replied. Kurama laughed softly, only a little surprised at Hiei's light attempt at humor.

The group had unintentionally divided itself back into two pairs, and Kurama marveled at how easily he had been partnered with Hiei. It was not unusual-quite the opposite, in fact. This was the way things had always happened before. Yuusuke and Kuwabara, Kurama and Hiei… The pairs were undeniable. They were all friends, of course. They had been through too much together not to be. But, still, this was how they were split.

How to Drown a Person in Sentiment and Sap, by Kurama.

How cute.

He impulsively ruffled Hiei's hair. The youkai swatted at his hand in response, but Kurama playfully dodged his arm and ducked his own underneath to continue his expired ministrations. Hiei leapt to the side, Kurama tailing him perfectly. Yuusuke and Kuwabara's scuffle went unnoticed as the pair engaged in their own fray, and soon a full blown chase had erupted from the playful teasing.

Hiei rushed forward, ducking underneath and between the trees as Kurama dashed after him. Periodically looking over his shoulder, thereby breaking one of the most fundamental rules of the chase and giving it a much needed playful air, the youkai dodged Kurama's periodic swings and made sure to keep his pace slow. Peals of laughter erupted from either end of the field, sometimes from Yuusuke and Kuwabara's side, sometimes from Kurama and Hiei's.

Hiei smiled a little. Kurama was surely out of his self-pitying misery. How he had managed to help, he had no idea, but he was glad he had done whatever it was that did it.

'Three…two…one!'

Kurama took a catapulting jump forward and pinned Hiei underneath himself. Hiei fell to the ground with a "huff" noise, feeling breath escape his lungs. Kurama laughed and assaulted him, fingers gliding up and down his friend's sides as he tickled him.

Hiei wasn't ticklish in the conventional sense, of course. But it was sweet, in a way, a kind of harmless play that rarely came about and was unheard of in Makai. Letting the redhead have his way for another few moments, Hiei turned and flipped Kurama on his back, reversing their positions and sitting on the kitsune's chest in a pin.

"I win," he declared firmly. Kurama let out another cough of a laugh.

"You do," he relented. Hiei's smug smile was only adding to the point, and he didn't know if rebelling against the firmly planted youkai would do him any good. Probably more harm, actually.

"Oi!" Yuusuke's call echoed across the grass. "C'mon, guys, let's go! I have the coordinates written down!"

Hiei and Kurama smirked to each other as the youkai stood gracefully off of his friend, offering a hand to help him up. Surprised at the gesture, Kurama hesitated, causing Hiei to mistake the action and withdraw his arm. Kurama smiled, getting himself up and draping his arm across Hiei in a half hug. The youkai fidgeted, but Kurama released him anyway and they walked over to their friends.

"Do you, Yuusuke?" Kurama asked kindly, pretending not to remember that Yuusuke had flourished the directions earlier on. Hiei looked away to hide his grin.

"Yeah, I guess I forgot I had them in my pocket," Yuusuke replied with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Ready?"

"Quite."

Kuwabara and Yuusuke took on matching poses, pointing off towards a nearby forest. They added some flourish to their gestures and stepped forward.

"ONWARD!" the cried in unison, charging off. Kurama briefly wondered if they had rehearsed that, or it had just been natural. Either option was plausible.

Hiei looked up at Kurama. "Should we tell them?" he asked with a snicker.

"We have to, I suppose," the kitsune replied.

Hiei nodded, relenting easily, and darted forward a few steps.

"Yuusuke! Kuwabara! It's this way!"

"ONWARD THIS WAY!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The trek had lasted only a few short minutes more when Kurama held out his arm to stop Hiei. Yuusuke quickly noticed the silence behind himself and Kuwabara, and paused to look back, Kuwabara following suit. Kurama's eyes had glazed over with a bitter black-tinted green. Even Hiei paused in surprise.

"Here. There it is," Kurama spat, pointing.

A large house loomed over the horizon, elegantly furnished and with large, ornate doors. It was not the sort of thing Yuusuke would expect of Miru, who, from what the youkai had told them, preferred small, hidden places like caves. But no-a massive golden dragon coiled around the entrance, which was painted with a pair of large, vicious looking golden eyes. Silver seemed to float from the dragon's presence in thick coils of elegant fabric, almost like ropes of fine fur. Kurama grit his teeth and his eyes drew into slits as he laid eyes upon the silver coils and golden eyes. He and Hiei darted forward, ahead of Yuusuke and Kuwabara, stopping short just before the entrance.

Kuwabara looked to Yuusuke with a question in his eyes. "What was that about?"

Yuusuke shrugged halfheartedly, his attention focused more on the two who had just run off. He followed them, Kuwabara trailing behind him slightly.

"This is definitely Miru's stronghold," Kurama growled. "The place reeks of misfits." A low, throaty sound crept into his voice as he spoke, and Hiei turned querying, slightly worried eyes on him. Yuusuke made a move to go to the kitsune, but stopped himself, and Kuwabara wisely hung back.

The place reeked of misfits? Did Kurama know something he wasn't telling them? Kuwabara nodded slowly.

The hiyoukai stalked forward and pushed open the door-it was surprisingly easy, if too heavy for a normal ningen. The coils of silver fur laced around him in an arc, rearing back as he swatted them away.

Kurama growled again, storming after his friend. This time, the silver went directly down to the trespasser, tying themselves around his chest and pinning him in place. Yuusuke darted forward and tried to pry them off, but they only rewove themselves, lengthening and keeping Kurama for themselves.

As for the redhead, he was looking out at the hall before him with purely silver eyes, devoid of all color. A faint aura pulsated around his body, growing stronger every second until he was surrounded by a fire of bright pink ki. The flames of energy swept up the silver furs, throwing them back and allowing Kurama to pass in peace. He did, but not before throwing another shock of power at the furs for good measure, burning them to threads. Yuusuke and Kuwabara darted through the archway of the door before the silks could reweave themselves again.

The dragon appeared to struggle against its bindings to the wall, twisting and thrashing about as it turned its head down, nipping at the group of them. Yuusuke threatened it with a Rei Gan, but it merely snorted and withdrew itself. The silver fur fell in newly woven ropes before the door, a thin blockade against the outside world.

Kurama glared again, spitting once on the floor.

The merry little brigade walked down the hall in a loose formation, Kurama at the head.

Hiei was torn between stepping forward and hanging back.

Kuwabara was firmly keeping himself a meter behind the silently raging kitsune.

Yuusuke sighed.

The team was going to hell.

Again.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"She's around here somewhere, I know it."

Hiei finally decided to walk up to his friend, though he kept his arms folded across his chest. "Kits-Kurama. She's not here, we've searched up and down every corridor. It's hopeless. Let's go, we'll see if we can find any more clues."

Kurama turned in a flurry of red and white, his eyes flashing angrily. Completely devoid of…emotion, practically. Hiei tried hard to keep himself neutral.

"I smell her!" Kurama insisted again, louder than the first. "She's here! I can't give up!"

Frantically, Kurama pointed down the hall to the door there. "That door. There are youkai behind it, I can tell. You can't sense their youki? You can't smell their stench?"

Yuusuke stepped forward, keeping his hands before himself in an attempt to be placating. "Calm down, Kurama," he said softly. Kurama turned a wild gaze on him, and Yuusuke paused, stepping backwards once. Clearly steeling his resolve as he grit his teeth, Yuusuke tried again.

"Kurama, it's okay. Miru probably was here. I bet there were youkai behind that door." He shook his head slowly, keeping his eyes on the mad kitsune. "But the smell can't be more than just lingering. We've been through the whole house. I don't-"

"You don't know what this is like!" Kurama shouted furiously. "You don't know her scent! You don't know her youki! You don't know what this is like!"

"Kurama," said Kuwabara, stepping forward. The raging gaze turned to him instead, but the ningen did not back away. Fear danced in his eyes for a moment, but he tightly shut them and when they opened, he only held a wish to help his friend. "We want to help you, we really do. We all want Miru to pay, I think. We want to keep our promises to Kira, to Makoto, to…everyone. But we can't, if you're going to be irrationally storming into every place we find. If you're sensing youki that just isn't there. We need your help, not to carry you around as a useless mental patient."

"You don't understand!" Kurama shrieked again. "None of you! You're all wrong! All of this, all of this is all wrong!"

Yuusuke stepped forward. "Kurama…?"

"All of it!" the redhead screamed. "Miru is supposed to be here! She can't have foreseen that we would come here! She should be here! We should fight, and we should narrowly win-it should look to everyone as though we're going to lose. But then you, Kuwabara, or you, Yuusuke, or even you, Hiei, will come up with a special attack and we will be too strong and she will die! That's the way it's supposed to work! And we will make up for all the youkai Miru and Kurokyoui hurt, and we will tell them Miru is dead, and they will ask us to find Kurokyoui and kill him, too, and we will! It will be an easier battle than the one with Miru, but we will overestimate him slightly-we will be worried, just a little, but we will see that he is weaker than that and we will win! That's the way it's supposed to be!"

Yuusuke and Kuwabara exchanged a sidelong glance; this was going a little far from the Kurama they knew. In fact, it was a downright different person. Not Youko, not Shuuichi, and certainly not Kurama.

Hiei, on the other hand, had never been one to sit still. Walking-more like gliding, really, but how was he doing that?-up to Kurama, the hiyoukai firmly grabbed his friend's wrists and threw him sharply to the ground, sitting on him for good measure and to make sure he wouldn't run off. Kurama, still frantic over Miru, didn't seem to notice until he landed flat on his back.

"Hiei!" he bellowed. "Let me up right now!"

"No," Hiei snapped back, his voice dangerously low. "Kurama, this is absurd. You know Miru isn't here. We all do. Now, we can calm down and look for clues, or we can haul your sorry ass back to Shiori's place and tell her you've gone insane. Maybe she'll even spring to get you into an asylum, if you're lucky. Or you could move back in with her." His eyes glowing dangerously, Hiei leaned down until they were nose to nose. "Your choice, my friend."

Kurama even had the decency to gulp slightly. He nodded against the cold ground, his hair mussing against his skull. Satisfied, Hiei rolled off of his chest and stood, pointedly not offering Kurama a hand.

This was not the Kurama any of them knew. This was not even a Kurama who Kurama knew. He was not calm, he was frantic. He was not thoughtful, he was arbitrary. He was not even in control of himself, it seemed; he was letting his emotions control him. Tears glowed in his eyes as Hiei peered down at him. The kitsune started to push himself off of the ground, but at the very last moment, Hiei knelt and put out his hand. Kurama cocked his head at the odd change in tone, but took the help and let Hiei hoist him off his knees.

Kuwabara made sure to stand not too far from the others that he seemed afraid or untrusting, but not too close that he would seem care free or unobservant. Yuusuke noticed, but chose not to speak. Instead, he took a long, loud breath to break the tense silence.

"So, Hiei, you said something about clues?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Youkai: demon

Makai: Demon Realm, Hell

Kitsune: fox

Oi: hey

Hiyoukai: a fairly common fan term for Hiei, loosely translated as "fire demon"

Ningen: human

Ki: power

Rei Gan: spirit gun

Youki: demon power

Note: "Not Youko, not Shuuichi, and certainly not Kurama." Sometimes Kurama acts like Youko used to (in battle perhaps, such as his fight with Karasu), sometimes he acts like Shuuichi might (in school would be a good example), usually he's a mix of the two (when he's around the other Tantei, normally this is how he acts). Don't ask. This is my warped little world, remember.