Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Betrayal, Pain, Abuse and Lies: It's My Life ❯ A Bad Day At It's Worse, Turned To It's Best ( Chapter 1 )

A/N: I don't own any of this so don't sue me! Yu Yu Hakusho belongs to Yoshihiro Togash except for Paige and the plot. The rest is his! ^_~

*Betrayal, Pain, Abuse and Lies: It's My Life*
"This is all your fault." My Mother yelled downstairs, as I heard glass break.
"Don't you try to pin this on me. If it wasn't for you the fucking bitch would never had been born." My Father had yelled back, I then heard a sickening crack as my Father punched my Mother down.

As I listen from the confinement of my own room, I know I should not be surprised it's happened before.
Numerous times before if I have to be precise, and I knew what was going to happen next.
"I don't know what you're talking about, and it takes two to make a baby. Even if I'm willing to admit that she was a mistake. We were young we made a mistake." Mother admitted.
My parents never called me by my name, mostly because I knew they didn't love me; I was an 'It'.
And it was no surprise that I never loved them back, I never called them by them my parents; they were never so in my eyes.
I never even made contact when it wasn't necessary.
"I'm leaving!" I heard Father yell, soon after I heard footsteps pounding up the staircase; she was coming for me.
I had not even seen the point of locking the door anymore, if I did I would just get hit harder; it's been ten years since the abuse started.
Even if they could hurt me physically, no one could hurt me mentally never ever again.
I had grown into a beautiful young woman, with long flowing jet-black hair with occasional silver streaks; which was usually matted to my face by blood, clear ivory eyes; that never held any emotion, and pale skin; and no matter how much my small body was abused, my skin had yet to host a single scratch.
And you can be sure my Father has made note of that, but it wasn't only him that subjected me to sexual abuse.
Soon, Mother swung the door open, almost flying off the hinges, as she ran into my room and dragged me up to meet her face.
"Now you're going to get it, Little Bitch." Mother scolded; I wasn't the brat anymore, since I turned the age to tolerate my Mother's foul mouth, I had turned from the 'brat' to the 'bitch'.
*Smack*
Even though she had slapped me with all her might, all my head did was snap to the other side, eyes closed as I dared not to touch my burning cheek.
Mother had punched me to the ground, and dragged me up by my long dark tresses.
I looked at her with no emotion in my eyes, and Mother seemed mad; probably because she was determined to break me.

But then she smirked and said,
"I'll send your Father up later, you should enjoy it, whore." She sneered, as she walked out my room door.
I waited hours on end till Father got home, until one o' clock (not like I ever sleep) when my drunken Father came home, and braced my self for more of this torture.
I knew he would find me, but I went under the bed anyway; hoping he would not be able to think in his drunken state.
"Where's `daddy's little whore'. Come out come out where ever you are. There you are, you stupid slut." Father said, as he tried to pull me out from my hiding place.
I struggled but he was much stronger than I, and was dragged out from my small refuge, and thrown on to of the bed.
Father started grouping me, touching me in places a Father is not supposed to touch, and places a daughter cherished.
He started trailing wet, sloppy kisses down my flat stomach, and harshly squeezing my tender cleavage.

I knew if I yelled for him to stop, he wouldn't oblige, and that would push him over the edge and make him take the only thing dear to me I had left.

My virginity.

Yup, you heard right, everyone may think I was a whore but I have never been in love, and I have never met anyone to give myself to.
After Father was finished with his nauseating desire to touch me, his eyes roamed over my small body, after pausing he looked me in the eye, walked out and closed the door.
I ran into the shower, and tried to wash him off of me, I felt so dirty; and men ask us, women, why we can't trust them.
I put on my bath robe and sat in front of my Mirror, singing a song my grandmother sang, the only person who ever loved me, to me before she died six years ago.
"Although the face in front of me may never be on magazines," I sung in a clear voice.
"I know I'm still goin' shine." I continued, tears threatening to escape the confinement of my long eyelashes.
"I don't care what they think of me, I'm only what they've never been. My time is coning soon." Full fledged tears streaming down my cheeks.
"I'm a flower about to bloom." I finished, curling myself into a little ball on my bed.
I cried myself to sleep that night, wishing and hoping that someone could save me, knowing myself that the mere thought of it was simply impractical, but a girl could dream; Right?

I woke up the next day in front of my mirror the next morning, putting my blue headband at the top of my hairline.

I got up, my long waist length hair trailing behind me, and walked to my closet (which only consisted of my school uniforms, since I never went any where.) and took out my white shirt leaving the first three buttons undone, I put on my mid-thigh navy blue school skirt and put my tie trough the hoops where my belt was supposed to go.
I got on my black knee-high socks and put my platform school shoes after that, grabbing my CD player and walking out the door, before any of my parents got over their hangover.
Even if I lived three blocks from the school, I still rode my bike, not because I was lazy; it was mostly because I didn't want to bump into any perverts on my way to school.
Although many people would never expect it, hence the rumors going around that I sleep with my teachers for good grades, I'm the top student in my class, and having a good reputation in class.
I walked into the room, and silently cursed as I realized that the sensei was running late.
"Well, well, well. If isn't Paige, resident slut at Crossroads High. Fucked any new guys lately?" Mizuru Tarji, the most popular girl in school, teased laughing.
I just ignored her, as I went over to my desk and took out my school books.
"You are such a freak, don't you know." She asked snidely.
I looked up at her and answered,
"In what sense of the word?" I replied, smirking inwardly, as Mizuru realized that her taunts wouldn't intimidate me.
"Settle down class, settle down." My sensei, Mr. Takeuchi, said coming into the door.
As he started the lesson I tuned him out, thinking, wishing, and hoping that someone could take me away from here.
I had changed into my gym clothes, and walked out into the gym, going to my spot waiting for the sensei to give us instructions.
"Okay girls, today we're going to do cheerleading practices. And it's mandatory." She said, waiting for everyone to get into formation.
She looked at me, for I had not moved from the spot I had had been in first.
"And why pray tell are you not in formation, Miss Koishikawa? What makes you different than the rest of us?" The sensei asked, hands on her hips glaring at me.
I looked up at her calmly and replied, "What makes me different is that, unlike all of you, I'm not going to yell and jump around, like a bimbo, giving myself larcenist, a headache and suffer humiliation, just to pass a stupid gym class. That's what." I said, grabbing my uniform and duffle book bag, leaving the gym.
As I rode home, I was glad my parents didn't come home till late, because the principal said he was going to call my parents.
I had taken refuge in my room, but surprisingly, and regrettably, my parents decided to come home early and together.
"That bitch is nothing but trouble, making me come home from work, just because she is too smart-mouthed for her own good." Father complained.
"Wonder where she got that from?" Mother asked sarcastically, as the small exchange turned into to a war of verbal assaults.
I dropped to my knees in my room, covering my ears; I couldn't take it anymore, I couldn't take the fighting anymore.
In my anger, I pushed my backpack off my desktop, and then I saw it; there it was lying innocently on the floor, but what caught my eye was the sharp end of my protractor.
I grabbed it and pulled up my sleeve, I slowly itched the protractor down to my pale skin and sobbed as it made contact and drew blood.
It was refreshing and invigorating; I could tell that this was the beginning of a newfound addiction, which was more dangerous than any drug; and the hardest task: keeping my sanity.

Which was becoming harder, now that He had walked into my life.

***

"I'm not coming out." Said a voice behind a door.

"Come on out, Hiei. You're going to have to come out. Or Yuskue and I are going to drag you out." Another voice replied.
"Fine." Hiei agreed unenthusiastically, and stepped out of, his best friend, Kurama's bathroom.
All of the occupants in the room looked at him in shock, not believing at all that this was the short untrusting boy they had all met years ago.
Hiei had finally gotten his growth spur, and was about as tall, if not taller than Yuskue and Kurama; Botan had cut his wild hair leaving it flat on his head, his hair black giving off a blue glaze in the sun; he had his jagan removed since he found his sister and had no other need for his headband.
Right now he had on the Crossroads High School uniform on with the traditional white blouse with the navy blue tie and the black pants and shoes.
"Who are you?" Yuskue asked, looking at Hiei like he had grown an extra head.
"I. Am. Not. Going. Out. In. Public. Like. This." Hiei said, separating each word.
"But Hiei, you have to." Botan pointed out. "You don't have a choice."
"She's right." Said a teenage Koenma walking trough Kurama's bedroom door.
"I don't know why you had to send me on this undercover mission. Kurama's people skills are better than mine." Hiei complained.
"Believe me; you would be better for this job. Now any questions?" Koenma asked.
Hiei sighed and said, "What's her name again?"
"Paige. Paige Koishikawa. Her mother is American and her father is Japanese, which explains the weird name." Koenma explained.
Hiei was just about to disappear through the window when Koenma said,
"And Hiei, watch out for the rumors." Koenma left before anyone could question his statement.
"Good Luck, Hiei." Yukina said, smiling at her older brother.
"I don't need luck, when I have skill." Hiei said in his cocky voice, as he disappeared from sight.

***

You would think that the Emperor was coming, no some transfer; so he might be hot, big fucking deal.
I heard everyone talking about it yesterday afternoon, he's probably already there seeing that I'm thirty minutes late.
Father had forgotten to satisfy his drunken pleasures last night so he had to do it this morning, and it didn't help that it was raining cats and dogs outside, and my shirt had turned see through, not that I cared.
As I walked into the classroom, ruby met ivory and I felt a connection, it's either that or he's staring at my black lace bra, which is showing trough my shirt.

***

There she was just as Koenma described her to be, pale skin, light eyes, full-red lips, and a body any man would and could ever dream of.

Paige.
It was very convenient that her seat was right next to mine, and not that bitch Mizuru, who was really getting on my nerves.
Koenma was right about the rumors, the girl had quite the reputation; but that still wouldn't stop me.
We, Paige and I, were in science at the time and since we were sitting next to each other, we had to be lab partners
"If you will excuse me, Hiei. I have to get the thermometer, it right behind you."
I wasn't even paying attention to her request, I was entranced by the way my name rolled off her tongue, and I wanted to hear it again.
I was jolted back to reality when she rolled her eyes and leaned over me, fully aware that her cleavage was right in front of my face.
Paige had turned back around and sat on my lap encircling her legs around my waist, framed my face wither hand, and kissed me.
I kissed her with equal, if not more, force; my hands found the way to the small of her back as she entangled her long slender fingers in my hair, and pulled on I; hard.

One of my hands had moved from her back, crawling under her shirt, as my lips moved down to her slender neck.

She moaned rubbing herself against me, I could feel myself getting aroused by her, as her moans became louder and she started calling out my name.
"Hiei. Hiei. Hiei, hello can you hear me." I was shocked out of my daydream to see Paige napping her fingers in front of my face.
"Sorry, I zoned out for a little bit there." I apologized, bowing my head down shamefully; then I saw something surprising; my pants were wet, and I knew why.
I took off my jacket, thankful that Paige took that exact moment to do her mixing, and wrapped around me, trying to hide the wet spot in my pants; just then I knew I wanted something more than completing this mission.
I wanted her.
***
A few hours later I was walking into the girl's bathroom, when Mizuru confronted me.
"Listen slut, he is way out of your league. So, don't even try to fuck him. You'll just be wasting your time. He's mine, Koishikawa." Mizuru warned.
"I have no idea what or who you're talking about." I replied, in earnest confusion.
"Oh, well. Does the name Hiei Yoshizumi ring a bell?" Mizuru asked sarcastically.
"What are you talking about I don't even like him. And I'm more than sure he doesn't like me. So, you have nothing to worry about, Tarji." I reassured, washing my hands, and walking out the bathroom.
Not to far down the line I ran into more trouble as Satoshi Suou, biggest jock on the school, came up to me.
The last time I ran into him I had broken and bruised bones for a month, he started inching his way toward me, he smirked as he cornered me onto the lockers.
"Stop, please. No stop. Someone help me." I whimpered, as Satoshi rubbed himself against me.
"Help!" But my scream was muffled, as Satoshi pressed his lips against mine; I struggled, punching my small fists against his chest, and felt him smirk against my lips.
But my calls were answered, as Satoshi was punched down by an unseen force, I fell to the floor looking up into the crimson eyes of my savior.

***

I was on my way to my next class, when I heard something, or someone, namely Paige Koishikawa; I was rounding a corner when I heard a small whimper,
"Help. Please someone help me." Even though the muffled cry was barley audible, I could still hear it with my super sensitive ears.
I saw Paige pressed up against the lockers by a boy, who was about ten times her size, I saw her punching him with her tiny fists to avail, so I decided to give it a try.
I didn't even have to use a quarter of my power to punch the guy unconscious; I supped down to offer my hand to Paige, and I could tell she was debating whether to take it or not, but thankfully she did.
"Thank you." She said, getting up to walk away.
"Hey." I called out, as she turned around. "You wanna hang out sometime?" I asked her.
And to my surprise, she smiled and said, "I'll think about it." Heading through the front doors of the school.

***

I had opted to walk home today; taking out my CD player, and smiling as the words mirrored what was going on in my head.

So Many things I'm goin through

So much that I wanna do

It's starting to become so clear to me

Tomorrow ain't really guaranteed

So many days I thought of you,

It's about time you know the truth

Got to act quickly you and I, and fall in love

So many reasons why

Why don't we (so why don't we)

Why don't we

Why don't we (yea)

Why don't we fall in love (why don't we fall in love)

It's so many reasons

It's the only thing that lies to me (why don't we fall in love)

It takes such a load off to let you know

That you're the only one I never want to go

Things I never did now I want to do

A love I never felt now I feel for you

Why just swallow each and every ounce of my pride (oh pride)

Everything you do I wanna feel again

Ain't no use for us to pretend

Why don't we (why don't we, we, we, don't we fall)

Yea, yea, Oh fall in love

Yea, come with me

Tomorrow ain't guaranteed

No, baby lets be, baby lets be

Why don't we, why don't we why don't we fall in love

Why don't we, why don't we (oh, oh) why don't we fall in love

Oh, Oh yea.

I walked into my quarters grateful my parents weren't home, since there was no way I could wipe this smile off my face.
It was late at night, a few weeks later and I was doing my homework humming to myself; a few days before I had taken Hiei up on his offer, and the most fun in my life; it was nice to actually have a guy talking to you, and actually looking in your eyes.

My head snapped up as I heard someone knocking on my window, I looked over at the window and saw Hiei out on the tree outside soaking wet clad only in brown cargo pants and a beige t-shirt; I rushed over to open the window and helped him.
"What are you doing here, Hiei?" I asked, handing him a towel to dry off with.
"Well, I was taking a walk outside, take note that I have no jacket, and all of a sudden it just started pouring down. And, your house was the first that came in mind to go to." Hiei answered, handing me back my towel when he was finished with it.
"How did you know where my house was?" I asked suspiciously.
"You underestimate me." He replied, shaking his finger at me.
I rolled my eyes; I then spotted something that he had strapped to his back.
"What's that?" I asked, pointing to whatever that was on his back.
"This?" He asked, taking it off his back, as I nodded. "It's sword sheath. Ya, wanna see it." He explained, handing it to me.
I slipped the sword out of its confinements, and held it in front of me like a master; I studied the sword babbling on about it strength, weaknesses and how it was easy to maneuver in battle.
"Have you ever handled a sword before?" Hiei asked, looking at me with surprise in my eyes, even more so as I shook my head.
"Nope, but I'm fascinated by them. They are beautiful but deadly items, and I some how feel drawn to them for that very fact.
"Open this door!" I heard my Mother yell, trying to open my bedroom door.
"Hiei, go into the closet." I ordered pushing him along, which was very hard, even if he did have a much smaller figure than most of the guys I dealt with.
"Why?" He asked in confusion, but was allowing himself to be pushed anyway.
"I'll explain later just go in." I said, shutting the closet door with him safely inside.
My Mother came in and walked up to me, "Who's in here. I heard voices."

"It's just me. Talking to myself again silly me." I replied, staring at her intently.
"Are you mocking me?" She asked, not even waiting of an answered, as she punched me, drawing blood where her ring had made contact with my skin. "You're lucky I'm tired, or I would make sure you suffered longer than that.
She looked at me in disgust, as she walked out of my room and slammed the door; as she left I sat down on my bed and put my head in my hands; I didn't even see when Hiei had decided to come out of my closet.
I looked up at him as he sat next to me; he put his hand on my face, tracing my newly formed bruise with his thumb.
"How long?" He asked simply, as I opened my eyes to look at him.
"Ten years." I answered, looking down, not ale to look in his eyes.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" I flinched at the betrayal in his intense scarlet eyes
"I didn't want you to feel sorry for me. God, I'm so confused. I was content with my life; I was dealing with everything fine, and then you came along. I ju-." I was cut off when Hiei crushed his lips against mine, I felt like my lips were on fire (A/N: no pun intended. ^^), and I saw fireworks go off in my head; but he pulled back a few seconds after he had started.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. I'm so sor-." Hiei stared, but it was me who cut him off this time.
"Its fine, Hiei. Don't worry about it." I assured him.
"I have to go, I can't stay here." He said, getting up from his spot on the bed, only stopping when I grabbed his arm, in an act of desperation.
"Please don't leave alone. Not tonight, not feeling the way I feel. You don't have to do anything; just please stay here with me." He turned around, looking at the pleading look in my eyes, and nodded.
I came out of the bathroom after I had changed into my pajamas, a black spaghetti strap tank top, and voluminous black pants to match, I saw Hiei sitting by my window; he had turned around as I came from out of my bathroom.
"Bedtime." I announced, slipping into bed, as Hiei turned off my light; taking off his shoes and socks, slipping in to my bed behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist.
"Goodnight, Paige." He whispered, sending shivers down my spine, as I repressed my urge to shiver.
"Goodnight, Hiei." I yawned. "Sweet dreams." This was my last statement, before I drifted in to a slumber

***

I woke up the next morning, looking down at the sleeping angel in my arms; who knew she had to go through so much, it was no wonder the poor girl never trusted anyone; I couldn't wait to take her away from all of this; I snapped out of my reverie as Paige stirred in her sleep; I looked over her at the clock on her bedside table, it read: 5:00; I decided it was time for me to leave.
"Paige, wake up." I said, shaking her small form, chuckling as she swatted her had back and forth trying to push me away.
"What time is it?" She asked, watching me put on my shoes.
"Time for me to leave, and time for you to get ready for school." I said, climbing up onto her windowsill, and opening her window. I turned to look at her, to see her out of bed with her hand in her hips, and a scowl on her beautiful face.
"Oh." I said, as I realized what she wanted. I swept her off her feet and gave her a passionate kiss on the lips. She was smiling as I picked her back up, and ushered me to her window. "See you at school?" I asked, standing on the tree outside her window.
"You bet." She waved, as I climbed down her tree. And I knew today was the day to ask her.
That whole school day, I was itching to talk to her, but more rumors would start and people would take it the wrong way. I ran up to her at the end of the school, I called to her and turned and looked at me with red-rimmed eyes and dry spots on her cheeks where tears had been.
"What's wrong?" I asked her.
"Nothing. Everything is just getting to me, okay." I could tell she was lying, but I decided not to bother her about it.
"I have to tell you something." I told her, as she nodded for me to continue. "Come away with me." I said, looking down at her. "There's nothing for you here. Please." I pleaded, taking her hands in mine.
"I'll think about it." She said, as she pulled her hands from mine and walked away.
Something was wrong, I could tell.

***

I had lied to Hiei a few weeks ago, and that was hen I cut off all contact; why, well I was afraid, afraid of fall in love, falling in love with him; I'm the kind of girl that will take chances, and I'm not sure if I'm willing to make an exception yet.
I was fingering the sword Hiei had left here, when Father had called me down stairs; I put the sword back into its sheath, and walked downstairs, to find my Father there with something in his hand, my eyes widened as I realized what it was.

Hiei's socks.
He must have left them here, and mom went in my room to do the laundry, shit.
I walked down into the kitchen as Father looked up at him with a possessive look in his eyes.
"Whose are these?" He asked, holding up Hiei's socks. I didn't answer, he got up, drew a knife from the silver where draw, that looked like it could pierce right through my heart. "You have always taken pride in your beautiful face what would happen if it got damaged."
My eyes widened in realization, Father was jealous. But it was time for me to finally fight back; I punched my Father with all my might, grabbing long duffle bag and ran upstairs to my room. I locked the door and picked up my cell phone, as I slipped on one of my uniforms.
"Hello?" I heard him ask in a confused voice, no doubt wondering why the hell I was calling him after so long. I tried to hold the phone to my ears as I packed all my clothes and belongings in my bag.
"You remember when you asked me to come away with you?" I asked.
"Yes." I heard him answer.
"Well, my answer is yes. And could you get here like right this second, I'm in a little bit of trouble because of your socks." I said, putting my headband over my head.
As soon as I said it, I heard knocking on my window and saw Hiei outside waiting for me. I grabbed my duffle bag, climbing out the window and onto Hiei's back, wrapping my feet around his waist.
"Hold on tight." He advised, as we started going in an unknown direction at hyper speed.
We were nearing a three story house, which had a pale yellow and white color scheme. Hiei had rung the door bell as he put my down, and a small woman with black hair. "Hello Hiei. Shuichi and his friends are inside. Oh, and who's this?" She asked, looking at me, after I had taken refuge behind Hiei.
"Paige." I answered politely, as was started walking inside the woman's house. In the living room, the boy known as Shuichi and his friends watched me as I walked into the living room.
"Guys." Hiei acknowledged, pushing me in front of him. "This is Paige Koishikawa. Paige, this is the gang."