Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Enma's Torment Theatre ❯ An Explosive Sport – The Hiei-Hunt ( Chapter 34 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Enma’s Torment Theatre: Season Three
Episode Thirty-Four: An Explosive Sport – The Hiei-Hunt
Story: Half-Breed’s Curse, Chapter Three
Story by: Rose Thorne
Msted by: Rose and Chrissy

Rose here! This is one of mine we’re MSTing again. More recent chapter, too. We decided not to end it quite yet. The break helped a LOT, so I think we’re ready to have at it again. For a little while, anyway.

--

Hiei woke with a small shiver, feeling that *something* was watching them. He sat up immediately to find that Karasu’s face filled the entire wall. The fire demon shook Kurama gently, and the redhead flinched when he saw it, moving closer to Hiei.

“Good morning, my playthings,” Karasu cooed. “I plan to have some fun today. Will the Bastard kindly open his third eye?”

Hiei hissed, but did as he was told. All around them were bombs, floating in the air. His stomach dropped. “Oh, gods…” Kurama clung to him, his eyes searching Hiei’s, and the Jaganshi couldn’t bear to keep him in the dark. “Bombs,” he told him softly. Kurama went white.

Karasu smiled in what would have been a pleasant way had they not been in this predicament. “Kurama need not worry. These are not for him. Rather, they are for my sport. The Forbidden Child has ten seconds to run. After that, stopping will prove quite fatal.”

Kurama let go of Hiei, and Hiei glanced at him. The fox’s green eyes were wide and terrified. “Run,” he whispered, tears in his eyes. Hiei hesitated. “Run!”

Hiei didn’t need to be told again and took off, racing from the room. He realized that Kurama was following him, but heard the redhead banging on the door that led to the room that Yuusuke and Koenma were using. And he could feel the bombs as they started to follow him, matching his speed easily.

The fire demon was fast, and he knew it, but he wouldn’t be able to run forever. Sooner or later, the bombs would corner him. He’d come to a dead end or just plain tire out. The sheer number of bombs—probably fifty or so—would quickly overpower any kekkai. And kill him.

Leaving Kurama at the mercy of Karasu.

The fear spurned him on and he raced down the corridors, wondering what the hell he was going to do.

*

Despite what others might think, Xellos was by the large a very responsible priest. He did what he was told, when she told him, and that was really all she could ask for in a servant.

But even during undercover assignments, Beastmaster Xellas still heard from him, could still sense his presence. This long absence was not only unusual, but terrifying.

Xellos was her only servant, so she was rather partial to him. He was perfect to her, in every way. She didn't think she could recreate that. The thought of losing him had been steadily increasing as of late, when before such was considered very mortal and unworthy of comprehension.

In the last few years it was a very real possibility.

Something must be wrong. Xellos should have retrieved Lina Inverse and Zelgadis Greywords by now.

Perhaps he had just been distracted by something shiny?

Xellas growled. If that was the case, she'd have to think of an adequate punishment. In the meantime, with Xellos gone she was at a disadvantage against Dynast and Dolphin. They could decide to team up and take her out in Xellos' absence.

Dynast she could take care of, but Dolphin worried her.

Stretching her senses, she quickly found Xellos' weeks-old trail and headed into the Astral Plane.

*

Kurama had been hysterical when Yuusuke had answered the door, and that alone had told the teen that something was very wrong. The fox had only managed, “Karasu. Bombs. Hiei!” but Yuusuke got the drift and left Koenma to sort out the youko while he pounded on the door to Zelgadis and Xellos’ room.

When Zel opened the door, Yuusuke had to drop down, as Hiei had come running down the corridor, shouting an apology, presumably with the bombs hot on his trail. The look on Xellos’ face had confirmed that, and they had quickly moved to wake Lina and Kuwabara.

Lina had taken a while to wake and by that time Hiei had run through their corridor again. Zelgadis finally had to mention Gourry cross-dressing to get her to wake up, which had earned him a trip across the room.

Kuwabara looked worried. “What should we do?”

Yuusuke shook his head. “You stay here with Koenma. Make sure Kurama’s okay. We’ll figure something out.”

Hiei ran down the corridor again, this time from the opposite direction. He slipped when he tried to turn, but got up and ran again before the bombs reached him. But the short pause in his running was enough to show them that Hiei was being run ragged. They didn’t have much time.

They ran after him, but they couldn’t catch up. Lina scowled. “Is there anything we can do to set those bombs off?”

“Rei shotgun,” Yuusuke said. “If I can get between him and the bombs and shoot off a shotgun, it should detonate them.”

Zelgadis shook his head. “You’d be killed. Neither Lina nor I can do Resurrection. Too risky.”

Yuusuke glared. “Hiei’s going to die if we don’t do something!”

Hiei suddenly ran down the hall toward them, glancing behind him at the chasing bombs. That was a mistake, and he ran right into Xellos and knocked both of them over. The fire demon was up and running in an instant, but he chose the wrong corridor, a dead end after ten feet.

Zelgadis ran toward him without thinking, jumping in front of Hiei just in time to intercept the first bombs and slamming into the fire demon when they exploded against his back. He heard Xellos scream his name, but the bombs didn’t injure Zel. He used his body to protect Hiei’s, keeping the fire demon’s back to the bulkhead they’d slammed into.

Hiei gave a short cry of pain a few seconds before the bombardment stopped. Zelgadis waited a few seconds before stepping back. Hiei slid to the floor, semi-conscious and bleeding from the back of his head, where his head had hit the bulkhead, and his calf, where a bomb had made contact.

The fire demon was, however, in one piece, and that was Zel’s main concern. He turned to find Xellos approaching in a very enraged manner.

“Zelgadis.”

Zel flinched. “Xel?”

“That. Was incredibly. STUPID.” Xellos was still advancing, his mood obviously black.

Zelgadis backed up slightly, but straightened. “There was no other option, Xellos. He was going to die. There was nothing else we could *do*!”

Xellos reached him and just hugged him tightly. “I know,” he whispered, pain in his voice. Zelgadis hugged him back, understanding the helplessness that Xellos felt.

Kurama ran down the corridor, with Kuwabara and Koenma right behind him. Lina was already bending over Hiei, who was already mostly conscious, and examining his wounds. Kurama gathered the fire demon in his arms. “Hiei!”

Hiei winced. “I’m okay.” But he leaned against Kurama anyway, breathing heavily. “I don’t want to do that again,” he said softly, his eyes closing.

Lina sighed. “I’m going to use Recovery on him. He’s got a concussion and his leg’s pretty bad off. It’s going to wipe him out.”

Kurama bit his lip and nodded, and Lina got to work, warning Zel so he could shield the still-vulnerable Xellos from the white magic.

Yuusuke, Koenma, and Kuwabara conferred. “This isn’t good,” Kuwabara said.

“I hadn’t noticed,” Yuusuke said dryly.

Kuwabara scowled. “No, I mean that this shows how Karasu is going to act. Hiei’s in danger, and so’s Kurama.”

“Not to mention the rest of us,” Koenma murmured.

Kuwabara hesitated for a moment, but finally said, “I think we should find a larger room and sleep in shifts.”

Yuusuke winced, hating the idea for the loss of privacy, but he knew it was the best option at this point. “You’re right.”

They had no more time to discuss the subject, as the end of the hallway became a giant screen, with the laughing face of Karasu towering over them. Kurama yelped and pulled Hiei away with him, and Lina followed.

“Such an amusing sport,” the crow purred. “Such entertainment! A shame I couldn’t bag the Bastard, but that can wait for another day. Into the theatre with you.” Karasu’s eyes lingered on Zelgadis for a moment. “I shall have to devise a way to mar that skin of yours…”

Xellos’ reaction was immediate. He snarled and reduced the wall to slag, shorting out whatever screen had been in there.

They stood there for several minutes, and then Yuusuke finally spoke. “We should get to the theatre before he tries anything else…”

And so they went.

- Theatre -
[Sitting from left to right: Kuwabara, Koenma, Yuusuke, Hiei, Kurama, Zelgadis, Xellos, and Lina.]

Yuusuke: You okay, Hiei?
Hiei: [exhausted] I'll be fine.
Kurama: [hugs him tightly]
Xellos: [softly, still angry] I'm going to knock that crow's head off with my staff...
Yuusuke: [softly] I'm pretty sure that right's reserved for Kurama, Xellos...
Xellos: [smiles creepily] Yare, yare...
Zelgadis: [softly] He is *not* going to get me, Xellos.
Xellos: [firmly] No, he won't.
Lina: Man, Xellos, you're so scary when you're mad...
Xellos: [still smiling] That, Lina-san, is why it is not wise to anger me.
Lina: [edges away from him] Heheheh...
Zelgadis: [snickers] He's not mad at *you.*
Lina: And I'm terribly glad for that, I'll have you know.
Hiei: [softly] Imp, I'm fine.
Kurama: [fingers the blood staining his clothes] Mm. This time, yes.
Hiei: Kurama...
Kurama: [kisses him]
Hiei: [curls up in his lap] [softly] I won't let him, Kurama.
Kurama: [presses his face into Hiei's neck]
Hiei: [holds him, petting his hair]

>Half-Breed's Curse

Yuusuke: Wait... Didn't we read this before?
Kuwa: If we did, it was a while back. What was it about?
Yuusuke: Don't remember.
Koenma: Wasn't it the one where Hiei turns into a girl?
Yuusuke: Ohhh, right. The Ranma ½ one.
Kuwa: [snorts] I'm surprised you didn't say "Sexy no Jutsu".
Koenma: Weren't there more than one of the Ranma ones, though?
Yuusuke: [blinks] Like what?
Hiei: This one's the one where my clone has PMS and insults Botan repeatedly.
Yuusuke: Ohh. Good times.
Lina: Maybe for *you.*
Hiei: [glares at Yuusuke]
Yuusuke: [backs away] I didn't mean it like that...
Hiei: [rolls his eyes] [relaxes against Kurama]

>by Rose Thorne

All: Hi, Rose!
Hiei: Oh, goodie. More me-torture.
Kurama: [grumbles]
Hiei: [kisses him]
Zelgadis: [glances at them] Equal opportunity tormenter, my ass...
Lina: [cracks her knuckles]
Xellos: [fairly glows with anger]
Zel: [worriedly] Xellos...
Xellos: [cheerfully] I'm fine, Zel-bunny!
Zel: [surprises him by pulling him down for a kiss] I know how you feel, but there's nothing we can do right now...
Xellos: [sighs] [softly] I know...

>Yu Yu Hakusho is the property of Yoshihiro Togashi, Studio Perriot, Shonen Jump, et al. I do not acknowledge FUNimation with anything but the destruction of the series.

Yuusuke: And Fullmetal Alchemist, and Naruto...
Koenma: [softly] And they bought the rights to Slayers...
Yuusuke: Please, don't remind me.
Lina: Or us. Please.
Koenma: We haven't heard any more about that though.
Hiei: [sleepily] They ruin everything they touch. End of story.

>-------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------

Kurama: [sings] Because you're mine, I walk the line...
Hiei: [giggles]
Kurama: [beams]
Hiei: [leans against him and closes his eyes]
Lina: He'll probably nod off. Energy drain.
Kurama: [nods and pets Hiei's hair gently]
Hiei: [purrs softly]
Kurama: [kisses his forehead]

>Chapter Three
>"What's wrong?" Kuwabara asked. "Kurama?"

Yuusuke: George Lucas is planning on doing a Star Wars TV series.
Kuwa: ... Yeah, that qualifies as wrong.
Yuusuke: Oh, right. This is the one Kurama was pissed about because we read the second chapter.
Kurama: [shrugs] It was more than a year ago. I'm over it.
Lina: [Kurama] People have started thinking Hiei and I are a lesbian couple.
Zelgadis: Huh? I thought Hiei was the one that turned into a girl...
Xellos: Some fangirls treat Kurama like a female.
Kurama: [grumbles]
Hiei: [fondles him sleepily]
Kurama: [gasps] Dragon!
Hiei: [smirks] Definitely male...
Yuusuke: Old hat.
Hiei: So?
Yuusuke: [shrugs] You're just looking for an excuse to fondle him.
Xellos: [faux puzzlement] There's something wrong with fondling?
Hiei: [snickers] Koenma doesn't do it enough, apparently.
Yuusuke: Oi!
Hiei: [blows raspberries]
Yuusuke: Hiei-mama's mean!
Hiei: [growls]
Yuusuke: [puts his hands up] Hey, you're a chick in this fic, Hiei-chan.
Kurama: [holds his husband] Hiei, you need to rest!
Hiei: [scowls, but relaxes] No more chick jokes.


>Hiei curled into a ball with a little moan. There was a large tear in the clothing on his back, revealing blood on white skin.

Xellos: And the cross scar on his back.
Kurama: [makes a small noise in his throat]
Hiei: Xellos. Don't.
Xellos: [sweat drops] Ah, sorry, Kurama-san. The image brought Samurai Deeper Kyo to mind.
Kurama: [smiles weakly]
Kuwa: I'm surprised Mr. Number One Geek over there didn't notice that first.
Yuusuke: [raspberries]
Xellos: [smiles] I have apparently attained the rank of--what was it--number one fanboy?
Yuusuke: YOU HAVE NOT!
Zelgadis: [smirks] But you still missed it.
Yuusuke: It was a fluke!
Lina: Riiiight.
Xellos: "The circle is now complete; when I left you, I was but the learner. Now I am the master."
Yuusuke: "Only the Master of Evil."
Xellos: [sweatdrops] Yes, that too.
Zelgadis: [frowns, remembering a few things he's said in the past]
Xellos: [lays back across Zel's lap]
Zelgadis: [blushes brightly] X-Xellos...
Xellos: [grins cheekily] Yes, Zel-bunny?
Zelgadis: [sighs, fingers Xel's hair] Comfortable?
Xellos: [grin widens] Quite.
Lina: [giggles]

>He was still shaking and barely conscious.
>Kurama didn't answer. "Get the first aid kit."

Kurama: [hugs Hiei fiercely]
Hiei: [winces] Kurama, it's just a fic.
Kurama: [softly] You nearly died. He nearly killed you...
Hiei: But he didn't. He won't.
Kurama: [looks at him seriously] Can you promise that?
Hiei: [returns look] Yes.
Kurama: [sadly] Liar. There are no guarantees.
Hiei: Kurama, this is what he wants; for you to suffer.
Kurama: [kisses him] [softly] I know... I've never been so terrified before. When I heard those explosions, I thought...
Hiei: [same] I was terrified for you more than anything... [glares] I won't let him have you. I won't let him win.
Kurama: [same] I thought I'd lost you, Hiei... [holds him tightly] That I'd never see you again.
Hiei: [same, pets his hair] But you did. No matter what happens, no matter what I have to do, I won't leave you.
Kurama: [hides his face in Hiei's hair]
Yuusuke: [bites his lip, watching]

>As Kuwabara rummaged through a bag, Kurama quickly removed Hiei's cloak, revealing the filled-out tank top Hiei was wearing beneath.
>Yuusuke gasped and nearly dropped the flashlight. "He's a girl!"

Hiei: [snorts] Don't get too excited, pervert.
Yuusuke: Bet Kuwabara’s crush on Yukina transfers over.
Kuwa: What?!
Hiei: Don't even joke about such things!
Koenma: It's not like you haven't read Kuwabara/Hiei before...
Hiei: This is even worse.
Yuusuke: Kuwabara/femme!Hiei?
Hiei: Yes.
Lina: Xellos, there's something I've always wanted to know...
Xellos: Yes, Lina-san?
Lina: Were your boobs real?
Zelgadis: [chokes]
Xellos: Why, such an unladylike question, Lina-san.
Lina: Oh come on. That kimono didn't leave much to the imagination.
Xellos: [smiles] Sore wa himitsu desu!
Zelgadis: [softly] I like you as a guy better...
Xellos: [grins] Thank you, Zel-bunny. [softly] And you know anyway.
Zelgadis: [strokes his cheek fondly]
Lina: Awwwww... So cute!
Zelgadis: [blushes] He has his head in my lap. It's hard not to touch him...
Yuusuke: Masturbation tendency?
Zelgadis: [sputters] What?! No!
Hiei: He has Xellos to do that for him.
Zelgadis: [chokes again]
Hiei: [snickers}
Xellos: Yare, yare. Such voyeurs!
Zelgadis: Yeah!
Hiei: [snorts] Right.

>"Yes." Kurama turned Hiei onto his stomach and checked the wound on the sanjiyan's back without removing the top. It was deep. "And his ki is ice instead of fire."

Yuusuke: O-kay.
Hiei: [growls] They turned me into a Koorime, didn't they?
Kuwa: Looks like it.
Hiei: [grumbles]
Kurama: [nuzzles him]
Hiei: [kisses him]

>"Shit."
>Kuwabara silently handed Kurama the first aid kid.

Yuusuke: I thought you guys were gonna wait to get pregnant.
Hiei: Huh?
Yuusuke: [points at text]
Hiei: Oh. [snorts]
Kuwa: That'd be kind of creepy, though.
Yuusuke: Not arguing that.

>Kurama took out some salve and began spreading it on the wound.

Yuusuke: Only the wound?
Kurama: Ha ha. I'm not going to molest Hiei while he's injured.
Xellos: [softly] Yes, that's more Sanzo-san's territory...
Yuusuke: [remembering the picture] ... Seriously?
Xellos: I'm surprised, Yuusuke-san. You didn't notice all the times Goku fell unconscious and Sanzo held him? Gojyo-san thinks it's amusing--he can only show his feelings for the boy when Goku's unaware of it.
Yuusuke: Wouldn't Goku freak out a bit otherwise?
Xellos: Iya, unlikely. Goku loves him. "He showed me a world much, much brighter than the sun," and so on.
Yuusuke: Eh. Flashbacks, though.
Xellos: [nods] Lots of them.
Yuusuke: Like Sanzo reciting "Hold Nothing" every chance he gets.
Xellos: [nods] And every time they end up *not* fighting Kougaiji's group.
Yuusuke: [snickers] Yeah.
Kuwa: Bet Sanzo's just afraid to get close.
Yuusuke and Xellos: Oh yeah.
Koenma: After all, the risk is high.
Yuusuke: Huh?
Koenma: Of death. Losing someone you care about.
Yuusuke: [winces] Yeah... But isn't it worth it?
Hiei: To most people, yes. But some people have been hurt too much to bother trying anymore.
Xellos: My. The mood became melodramatic again so quickly...
Hiei: [yawns] Just saying.
Zelgadis: [snorts] You're enjoying the mood, Xellos. Why are you complaining?
Xellos: [pouts] Mou, Zelgadis. You know it's involuntary...
Zelgadis: I know that, silly.
Xellos: [speaks softly, smirks] I admit, though, that I am not averse to getting my strength back...
Zelgadis: [softly] I'm not particularly upset about that, either.
Xellos: [reaches up to touch his ear]
Zelgadis: [moves back slightly] Later.
Xellos: [frowns] A *lot* later, at this rate...
Zelgadis: [strokes his cheek lightly] We'll wait. Not a big deal.
Xellos: [smiles] No, it isn't.
Hiei: [snores softly]
Kurama: [rubs his back gently]
Hiei: [smiles in his sleep]

>As soon as he touched the injury, Hiei regained consciousness and began to struggle. "No!"

Yuusuke: Huh. Jumpy?
Xellos: Must not be used to Kurama-san's touch.
Lina: Or his instincts are messing with him.
Zelgadis: Understandable.
Kuwa: He *did* turn into a girl.
Yuusuke: It's like a set up for an M-preg fic.
Koenma: Or a Hiei-rape fic.
Yuusuke: Well, she *does* like torturing him...
Kurama: [growls]

>"Hiei, you're injured. I'm trying to help."
>Hiei's struggles died down. "Kurama?"

Yuusuke: Aww.
Koenma: Wait. It probably won't be as cute in a minute.
Yuusuke: Well, nothing's as cute as the real thing.
Kurama: [still growling]
Hiei: [wakes up] K'rama? What's wrong?
Kurama: [startled, shakes his head] Nothing. Fic irritating me.
Hiei: 'kay.
Kurama: [pets him]
Yuusuke: See? Not as cute.
Kuwa: [snorts] After all this time, you're still their fanboy.
Yuusuke: [blows raspberries]

>"Yes. Will you let me help?" Kurama was already spreading salve again.

Yuusuke: Oh man, I wanna take that outta context...
Kurama: Voyeur.
Yuusuke: Not like that!
Hiei: [goes back to sleep]
Xellos: [his eyes open wide] Hiei-san, move!
Hiei: [wakes and jumps over the back of the couch] What?
Xellos: [points his staff at where Hiei's head was]
Kurama: [shrieks when a small bomb explodes] How did you sense it?!
Xellos: [shrugs] I can see them just fine.
Yuusuke: Heh. Karasu's pulling a Randy. You'd better not fall asleep again, Hiei.
Kurama: [pale] I'll kill him.
Hiei: [crawls back into his lap] This time for good.
Kurama: [clings to him]

>Hiei jerked away, struggling again. "Get away!"

Kuwa: [Hiei] Youko cooties!
Hiei: [hits him]
Yuusuke: [Kurama] Too late, dear, I've already seen the boobs.
Hiei: [glares] I'll hit you, too, you know.
Yuusuke: [laughs nervously] Sorry. Habit.
Kurama: [softly] Hiei, calm.
Hiei: [slumps against him, grumbles]
Kurama: [squeezes his ass]
Hiei: [gasps] Imp!
Kurama: [licks his lips] Yes, Dragon?
Hiei: [smirks, shifts]
Kurama: [gasps] [very softly] Oh, you're going to get it later...
Kuwa: Lina, I have the feeling we're not going to use the shower any time soon.
Lina: [wrinkles nose] Oh gods...
Kurama: Who needs a shower?
Yuusuke: We're bunking in the same room, remember?
Kurama: [blinks] Eh?
Koenma: They were... busy when we discussed that, Yuu-chan.
Yuusuke: Oh. Right. Well, we decided that it'd be safer for all of us to stay in one room and sleep in shifts.
Kurama: [groans] You're right.
Hiei: Just find one with a big shower. Or a bathtub. Big one.
Xellos: Ooo. Big bathtub... Sadly, I forgot my rubber ducky.
Hiei: You're sitting on your replacement, Xellos.
Xellos: [giggles] So I am. Zel-bunny's much better to... play with.
Zelgadis: [blushes deeply]

>Kurama quickly grabbed a seed from his hair and grew a flower from it, then put it under Hiei's nose. The fire demon's struggles ceased.

Yuusuke: Kurama, do you have a kitchen sink up there?
Kuwa: Vortex.
Hiei: His head is not my cloak.
Kurama: [snorts]
Zelgadis: Or Xellos' bag.
Xellos: [grins] Or Heero Yuy's spandex.
Yuusuke: [snickers]
Kuwa: Fanboys.
Both: [blow raspberries]

>"Kurama... What was that?" Botan looked concerned.

Yuusuke: A reefer.
Kurama: No, that'd just make Hiei get the munchies. More than usual, anyway.
Hiei: [snorts]
Lina: [her stomach grumbles] Oh, don't talk about food.
Kurama: Oh. Right. We haven't eaten yet today, have we?
Lina: [moans pitifully]
Zelgadis: Oh, suck it up, Lina.
Lina: [falls over] Food...
Zelgadis: When you're hungry enough to eat your boots, we'll start worrying.
Yuusuke: Nothing edible in your cloak?
Lina: [contemplates her boots] No, just some magical jewels and coins and stuff.
Xellos: [reaches in his bag] Hmmm...
Lina: [looks at him with big, watery eyes] Food?
Xellos: [glances at her] Maaaaaybe.
Zelgadis: [smirks] Hey, Lina, stop looking at my boyfriend like that...
Lina: Food....
Zelgadis: Go eat Gourry.
Xellos: Yare yare. You know she's always like that when she's hungry. Ah ha! [pulls out a candy bar] Here you go, Lina-san.
Lina: [rips it open]
Zelgadis: The human vacuum strikes again.
Hiei: Food?
Zelgadis: [stares] Oh gods...
Xellos: Hmm... I might have another...
Hiei: [veeeery interested] Food?
Lina: More food?
Kurama: [wryly] Oh dear. Xellos, are you sure it's wise to give the children candy?
Xellos: [hums] The worst they can do is fight over it.
Hiei and Lina: [glare at each other] Mine!
Zelgadis: Lina, you already had one. Eat the wrapper.
Xellos: Bingo! [pulls out two]
Hiei and Lina: Food!
Kurama: [giggles and kisses Hiei's cheek]
Hiei: [eats his candy bar, politely offering Kurama a bite]
Kurama: [grins] No, you go ahead.
Hiei: [shrugs and finishes it]

>"Makai plant. Puts people to sleep." The redhead was busily working on Hiei's back. "Yuusuke, give Botan the flashlight and you and Kuwabara go set up camp. No fire this time. Leave the black bag and mine here."
>"Right. C'mon Kuwabara." They tramped off.
>"Botan, check the black bag. See if there's another shirt in there."
>Botan held the flashlight in one hand and rummaged with the other. Finally she held up a white, kendo top. "There's an obi in here, too, but no bra."

Lina: [back to normal] Ow.
Kuwa: Huh? Ow, what?
Lina: [rolls eyes] There *is* a reason girls wear them, you know.
Zelgadis: Are yours even big enough to hurt your back?
Lina: [casually smacks him across the room]
Xellos: [pouts from the floor] I was so comfortable too...
Lina: Then tell your boyfriend to stop being nosy.
Zelgadis: [limps back] The day wouldn't be complete unless you smacked me. [pulls Xel back onto the couch]
Xellos: [smiles] Are there pliers here?
Zelgadis: [blushes] I don't know...
Lina: [snickers]
Xellos: Goodness. [begins fixing it by hand]
Zelgadis: [sighs] Just be careful. Don't want you to hurt your hands on sharp ends.
Xellos: [kisses his cheek] You're so sweet.
Zelgadis: [blushes]

>Kurama stopped and blinked at her. "Huh?"
>"We'll have to bind his breasts. Otherwise they'll hurt his back and get in his way. He's got at least a C cup."

Yuusuke: Nice rack, Hiei.
Hiei: [smacks him]
Lina: [grumbles about people with big breasts]
Hiei: [snorts] They'd just get in the way, Lina.
Lina: [glances down at her chest] Bah. I'm not gonna pout about it.
Hiei: [shrugs] Besides, I doubt Gourry cares much.
Lina: [blushes furiously]
Zelgadis and Xellos: [snicker]

>Kurama winced. "We'd better do that while he's still unconscious." He quickly stripped off Hiei's tank top and bandaged the wound in his back.

Kuwa: Yeah. He'd kill you if he was awake.
Xellos: [hisses softly]
Zelgadis: [blinks] What's wrong?
Xellos: [sweat drops] Ah, nothing, Zelgadis. [continues with his hair, though more slowly]
Zelgadis: [frowns, grabs his hand] Let me see.
Xellos: [smiles, tries to pull his hand away] It's alright, Zel-bunny, really.
Zelgadis: [seriously] Let me see.
Xellos: [looks down] Okay.
Zelgadis: [takes his hand]
Xellos: [mumbles] It's not bleeding. Just got poked.
Zelgadis: I'm sure there are pliers somewhere on this wreck. My hair can wait.
Xellos: But...
Zelgadis: [rolls his eyes] It's *fine.*
Xellos: [lays back down in his lap] Alright.
Lina: [smiles]

>"Sit him up. I found bandages to use."
>"Right." Kurama gently moved Hiei into a sitting position, facing Botan.
>"Hold his arms up, too." Botan worked quickly and effectively until she was satisfied. The result was almost like a bra. "And his pants are falling down."

Hiei: [shifts] Not yet.
Kurama: [gasps] Oh, but they will be.
Hiei: When?
Kurama: Soon.
Hiei: How soon?
Kurama: Real soon.

>"Tighten the belts, then."

Yuusuke: [Botan] It might help if you stopped fondling him too.
Koenma: And if they weren't dry humping.
Hiei: [kicks at them] Stop watching!
Kurama: Maybe you should pay more attention to each other.
Yuusuke: [leers at Koenma] Foot massage?
Koenma: [bites lip] Uh, probably better wait...
Yuusuke: [giggles and kisses him]

>Botan sighed. "Koenma told me I'd be useful on this mission, but I didn't think this was what he meant."

Kurama: Of course it was. He's a pervert like his boyfriend.
Koenma: [coughs, embarrassed]
Hiei: Notice neither of them are arguing.
Koenma: Well, she *would* know what to do in such a situation...
Hiei: Heh.
Koenma: So I *would* send her. I don't think even Kurama knows how to bind breasts and deal with feminine needs.
Hiei: [stretches] Whatever.
Kurama: [lets a hand trail down Hiei's taut belly] Mmm...
Hiei: [smirks, flexes] Like what you see, Imp?
Kurama: [slips a hand under Hiei's waistband] More like what I feel...
Hiei: [purrs]
Kurama: [pokes an erogenous zone on Hiei's hip]
Hiei: [moans, squirms]
Kurama: [removes the hand, kisses Hiei]

>Kurama rolled his eyes. "Hand me the shirt and obi." He carefully dressed Hiei, looping the obi around his slender waist and securing it.
>By that time, Botan had finished with all four of Hiei's belts. "We should join the boys."
>Kurama nodded. "Grab the bags. I'll get Hiei."

Yuusuke: Gonna carry him?
Kurama: [as Hiei licks his neck] To bed.
Hiei: [smiles] No complaints here.

>* * *

Xellos: [sings] Your dream dies, my dream is left behind /In the shining darkness, who was the one who smiled? /Your voice fades away, a voice finds shelter within me / beneath the distant Milky Way, there is no song to sing...
Kurama: Weiss?
Yuusuke: Aida Takeshi is batshit crazy. His lyrics make no sense.
Hiei: [snorts] That's abnormal?
Zelgadis: I thought the song was okay...
Yuusuke: [smirks] Because Xel was singing it.
Hiei: You complained a few years back that one of Zelgadis' songs doesn't make sense.
Yuusuke: It didn't.
Zelgadis: Which one?
Yuusuke: Uh. More Than Words. I think.
Zelgadis: Ah.
Xellos: Don't listen to him. You have a lovely singing voice, Zel-bunny.
Yuusuke: The voice is fine. The lyrics just don't make sense.
Xellos: [bonks him with staff]
Yuusuke: Ow! It was just an honest opinion! Geez!
Zelgadis: [snorts, touches Xel's face] It's alright, Xellos.
Xellos: [glomps him]
Zelgadis: [laughs]
Lina: [shakes her head, giggling]

>Hiei didn't wake up for the rest of the night, barely moving under his cloak. When he did wake, he threw the cloak off and scrambled toward a tree, only to miss the branch he was aiming for and fall painfully on the ground. He lay there, stunned.

All, except Hiei: [laugh]
Hiei: [glares at them]
Yuusuke: Oh come on, that was kinda funny...
Hiei: Not for me. That happened once. When I was little. I broke several bones.
Kurama: [frowns] You never told me about that...
Hiei: I was practically a baby. Long time ago. Hurt like hell, though.
Kurama: [hugs him]
Hiei: [smiles slightly] Had to set them myself, too.
Kurama: [winces in sympathy]
Hiei: [shrugs] Part of Makai life, Imp. You know that.
Kurama: I know...
Hiei: [kisses him deeply]

>Kurama carefully approached. "You okay?"
>Hiei sat up slowly, looking embarrassed. "What happened?"

Yuusuke: You fell into Spring of Drowned Girl and Botan felt you up.
Hiei: Haha.

>"Which part?" Yuusuke asked from a distance. "We got attacked, you collapsed and changed into a girl, and we ran."
>Hiei flushed angrily. "After that."

Yuusuke: Then Kurama tried to kill Botan for feeling you up.
Kurama: She wouldn't do that.
Yuusuke: I know. Just joking.
Xellos: [Ryoga] Then Kuno started kissing you.
Kuwa: [Kuno] Pig-tailed girl!!
Hiei: [Ranma-chan] Give me back my first kiss, you bastard!!
Yuusuke: [snickers]
Kurama: Okay. [gives it enthusiastically]

>Kurama sighed. "You were injured, but when I tried to help you, you panicked. So I sedated you and dressed your wound."

Yuusuke: Because he takes good care of Hiei like that.
Kurama: If it was a bad wound, there wasn't any other choice.
Hiei: Fanboy.
Yuusuke: [sheepish grin]

>Botan piped up. "I helped with... the other stuff."
>Hiei pointed to his chest. "This?"
>Botan blushed. "Yeah."

All, except Hiei: [laugh]
Hiei: [gives Kurama a look] Laugh it up, Imp.
Kurama: [caresses Hiei's nipples] Mmmm. Man-boobs.
Hiei: [groans]
Yuusuke: [falls over laughing]
Kurama: [softly] I want to suck on them.
Hiei: [smirks, softly] Later, Imp.
Kurama: [looks disappointed] But I'm hungry now...
Hiei: [rolls his eyes] Well, if you *want* to do that in front of all our friends, scarring them for life...
Kurama: [licks his nose] I'll wait.
Hiei: [licks his back] If you're sure.
Kurama: [grins] Wouldn't want to embarrass you.
Hiei: Not an embarrassment. I don't think you *could* embarrass me.
Kurama: [raises an eyebrow] Is that a challenge.
Hiei: [snickers] Only if wild nights are an embarrassment.
Kurama: [quotes] "Wild nights! Wild nights! / Were I with thee, / Wild nights should be / Our luxury!" [Emily Dickinson; Rose is obsessed with her right now.]
Lina: Huh?
Kurama: [grins] Emily Dickinson. Poet.
Lina: Ah.
Hiei: [smirks] Still not embarrassed, Imp.
Kurama: [grins] Wasn't trying to embarrass you.
Hiei: [kisses him deeply]
Kurama: [kisses him back, caressing his back]

>The sanjiyan rose and stumbled slightly. "Why?"

Kurama: I still like that.
Hiei: Yeah.
Zelgadis: [softly] Wake up, Xellos.
Xellos: Shh. I'm hunting rabbits.
Zelgadis: What? ... Oh. Xellos, don't.
Lina: [blinks] Don't what?
Zelgadis: [rolls eyes] He's trying to sense out where the bombs are coming from by pretending to sleep.
Xellos: They're slipping through that holy barrier. I could tell with the last one.
Hiei: [interested] The one outside the base?
Xellos: [nods] The crow needs to create an entryway for anything to pass through.
Hiei: [grins]
Xellos: [grins back]
Zelgadis: [sighs] Please, don't play with fire.
Xellos: I won't be hurt, Zelgadis.
Zelgadis: You were!
Xellos: Yes, well, that'll teach an old Mazoku to look where he's going, won't it?
Zelgadis: [hugs him]
Xellos: [beams] But thank you for caring.
Zelgadis: [sighs]
Xellos: [licks his earlobe]
Zelgadis: [eyes widen] Eep.
Xellos: [chuckles evilly]

>"It, well, supports them. Otherwise they hurt the back."
>Hiei considered this, then shrugged. He looked extremely uncomfortable, and avoided looking at the others.

Lina: Yes, well, they can be an embarrassing subject.
Zelgadis: [dryly] We hadn't noticed.
Lina: It's not like with guys, they can talk about their private parts.
Yuusuke: That's a stereotype.
Kurama: Hiei and I certainly don't *talk* about them.
Hiei: Waste of time. Doing is better.
Xellos: Zel-bunny and I talk, though I'm usually trying to convince him he won't hurt me...
Lina: Irk. Too much information!
Zelgadis: [is bright red] Xellos...
Xellos: Sorry, Zel-bunny.
Zelgadis: [softly] I do hurt you though...
Xellos: [same] We talked about that.
Zelgadis: [hugs him] I know. Can't help how I feel.
Xellos: [whispers in his ear] I rather enjoyed it, you know.
Zelgadis: [smiles shyly] Really?
Xellos: Yes. [leers] I'd love to do it again.
Zelgadis: [ducks his head] Me too.
Xellos: [smirks] So don't be upset, Zel-bunny.
Zelgadis: [hugs him again] Okay.
Xellos: [smiles]

>"We have some breakfast fixed up. Come have some and we can talk," Kurama said softly.

Hiei and Lina: Food?
Zelgadis: [groans] No food.
Xellos: [grins] But food is good!
Zelgadis: Yes, but we don't have any here right now.
Lina: [starts gnawing on seat]
Zelgadis: [sighs]

>Hiei looked up at him, and Kurama was startled by the suspicion and tense apprehension in his face.

Yuusuke: Oh. Shit.
Kuwa: Huh?
Yuusuke: Why would a chick be suspicious and apprehensive around guys?
Kuwa: Oh...
Hiei: [rolls his eyes]
Kurama: [sighs] There goes fandom again, thinking I'm a rapist...
Hiei: [kisses him] It's probably just my clone being paranoid.

>He tried again. "We need to know what's going on so we can help you, Hiei."

Yuusuke: Yeah, that's going to go over well.
Hiei: Only if my clone's a paranoid moron.

>The fire demon - ice demon walked past him and sat down by his cloak. Kurama handed him several pieces of fruit and sat down several feet away.

Zelgadis: No comments about food.
Lina: [groans]
Xellos: They can't help being hungry, Zelgadis-san.
Zelgadis: She eats more than a whole country in one *day.*
Lina: [groans again] I can't help it!
Xellos: [murmurs] It's the high power level; tends to use up more energy, and eating replenishes that.
Zelgadis: [sighs] *I* don't have to eat that much.
Xellos: [smiles] Yes, well, loopholes are fun.
Zelgadis: [confused] Loopholes?
Xellos: [pokes his chin] I have mentioned that your physical nature is rather unique.
Zelgadis: [blushes] Oh. Right.
Xellos: [smiles gently] You don't need as much nourishment, not because you are any weaker than Lina-san--which you're certainly not--but your spiritual energy is different. Not bad, but different.
Zelgadis: [smiles] So if I was a regular human, I'd eat as much as her, eh?
Xellos: [giggles] It's a great possibility.
Zelgadis: Never thought about it like that.
Xellos: [grins; is pleased Zel isn't bothered by it]

>Kuwabara spoke up. "Why'd you turn into a girl?"

Yuusuke: Water was thrown on him!
Koenma: He used Sexy no Jutsu.
Kurama: Naruto stopped being interesting.
Yuusuke: You're too picky.
Kurama: You're too easily pleased.
Kuwa: It's just an anime.
Hiei: [snorts] Remember who you're talking to.
Kurama: After over a hundred episodes, the only character even vaguely interesting or changing in any way was Gaara.
Yuusuke: And I disagree.
Zelgadis: Can we hurry up? I want this to be over soon.
Kurama: Fine, fine.
Yuusuke: Whatever.

>Hiei cringed. Kurama shook his head. "Kuwabara-kun, let him eat first. It's been a bad night."

Lina: [groans]
Hiei: You said it, fic.
Kurama: [holds him close]
Hiei: [kisses him]

>"I can talk while I eat, Kurama.

Zelgadis: Must have picked that up from Lina.
Lina: Oi!
Zelgadis: What? It's the truth.
Lina: [grumbles]

>We need to move on soon, anyway." Hiei bit into the fruit. "I'm a half-breed, and this is the half-breed's curse. It's not so much that I turned into a girl as my aura switched."

Kurama: Why does that sound familiar?
Yuusuke: [sings] I want to change the world / nido to mayowanai / kimi to iru mirai / katachi doreba / doko made mo toberu sa...
Kurama: Oh, right. I try to block Inu-Yasha out.
Yuusuke: Che. So picky...
Hiei: It *does* suck.
Yuusuke: Well, I'm not gonna argue with you on that one...
Kurama: Because it's true.
Yuusuke: [nods] I much prefer Ranma.
Hiei: Agreed.

>"To ice," Kurama murmured.
>Kuwabara scratched his head. "But you changed into a girl, too. Why?"

Yuusuke: Well, the same reason it's done in other anime. Fanservice.
Hiei: [snorts] People like seeing boobs, and it's apparently okay if the character was originally male.
Yuusuke: I don't think we have to worry about your clone using the change to his advantage at least.
Hiei: [laughs] I doubt my clone can see any advantage.

>Hiei winced. "I'm half fire demon, but I'm also half... half Koorime. All women. So when this happens, I also become female."

Yuusuke: And three, two...

>Kuwabara frowned. "Wait. Half Koorime?"

Yuusuke: [himself] Yeah, you know. What Yukina is.
Hiei: Yay for imminent explosions...
Kuwa: [smiles] You know, she's really happy you told her, Hiei.
Hiei: [blinks] Yeah. I know.
Kuwa: Just saying.
Hiei: [nods] I haven't really had a chance to visit with her...
Kurama: [rubs his back gently]
Hiei: [softly] I wish we were home...
Kurama: [same] I know, Dragon.
Hiei: [kisses him]

>"You're Yukina's brother, aren't you?" The tone was accusatory. Then Kuwabara stared at him, confused. "Why-?"
>"None of your business. I'm not justifying myself right now," Hiei interrupted softly. "And you wouldn't listen anyway."

Kuwa: I would've...
Hiei: [shifts uncomfortably]
Kurama: [moans softly]
Hiei: [stops] Er, sorry. Didn't mean to do it that time...
Kurama: [eyes take on a feral gleam] No taking it back now.
Hiei: [smirks, licks his neck]
Kurama: [kisses him fiercely]
Hiei: [pulls back, suddenly worried] Are you really okay? Just yesterday you...
Kurama: [softly] This morning... made me realize that every second counts. I'm not letting him get to me, not when I want you.
Hiei: [fingers his hair] Okay.
Kurama: [nips his earlobe] I don't care if he watches.
Hiei: [licks his jaw] Neither do I.
Kurama: [smiles, softly] Good. Because I fully intend to fuck you into next Sunday once this MST is over.
Hiei: [smirks, softly] I'll hold you to that.
Kurama: Please do.

>Kuwabara glared, but Kurama smoothly cut him off. "How often does this happen?"
>Hiei shrugged. "About every thirty-four years or so. I checked it out, and it's something about two planets in opposition and lunar eclipses. Celestial cycles."

Yuusuke: Definitely Inu-Yasha.
Kurama: Please tell me there are no jewel shards involved in this...
Yuusuke: Probably not.
Kurama: Good.
Hiei: [snorts]
Koenma: [softly] If this one goes online, Dad's going to get a lot of hate mail for this...
Yuusuke: That's a bad thing?
Koenma: ... No. Keep insulting Inu-Yasha.
Yuusuke: [grins] Yes, master.
Koenma: Good Padawan.
Yuusuke: Do I earn a kiss, master?
Koenma: You most certainly do, Padawan. [kisses him]
Yuusuke: [kisses him back]
Kurama: It's a shame George hadn't egged their relationship on a little more. The prequel trilogy might have been more bearable.
Hiei: Lucas is an idiot and probably a homophobe.
Yuusuke: I wouldn't be surprised if he were.
Xellos: Well, there aren't any gay people in the movies.
Hiei: Luke.
Xellos: Besides him.
Yuusuke: There aren't any gay people in science fiction in general, are there?
Kurama: Not any that I can recall.
Koenma: Well, there's Kaworu Nagisa...
Yuusuke: Anime doesn't count.
Hiei: Anime's a whole different genre.
Yuusuke: That's just wrong, man. Straight white people can do whatever the fuck they want, and what do we get? Brokeback fucking Mountain.
Hiei: A movie I don't want to see.
Yuusuke: Hell yeah, I'm still boycotting that shit.
Kurama: What's your reasoning?
Yuusuke: [shrugs] It rubs me the wrong way.
Kurama: I didn't like the temper tantrum the author had when it didn't win the Oscar.
Yuusuke: She kept saying that they were homophobic and stuff right?
Hiei: Yup.
Yuusuke: What a moron.
Hiei: She didn't even consider that *maybe* it just wasn't good enough.

>Botan frowned. "So how long does it last?"
>"About a month. Worst part about it is I can't figure out how to use the ki."

Lina: [winces] I can sympathize. Kind of.
Zelgadis: [snickers]
Lina: Hey, how would you like to be unable to use your powers for three days every month?
Zelgadis: I'd probably hate it.
Lina: There you go then.
Zelgadis: You'd probably be amused, though.
Lina: Well, yeah, because it wouldn't be me.
Zelgadis: Yet you blame me for finding it funny?
Lina: Yes!
Xellos: [laughs softly] Zelgadis, you should know there's no reasoning with her.
Zelgadis: PMS, maybe.
Lina: Power beyond twilight in crimson blood that flows--
Zelgadis: [covers her mouth] Okay, okay!!
Xellos: [winces] We *are* in a vacuum, Lina. If the hull breaks...
Lina: [slumps, grumbles]
Xellos: Yare, yare.

>Kuwabara snorted. "You should ask Yukina."
>Hiei laughed harshly. "You're forgetting that she's a half-breed, too. I doubt she could help me right now."

Hiei: Can I kill my clone?
Yuusuke: We wish.
Kurama: [kisses Hiei]
Hiei: [glowers at text]
Kurama: [licks his forehead]
Hiei: [gasps loudly]
Kurama: [chuckles lowly] You pay too much attention to the fic, Dragon.
Hiei: [raises eyebrow] And not enough attention to you?
Kurama: [leers] Precisely.
Hiei: [smirks] Well, we can't have that.
Kurama: So what are you going to do about it?
Hiei: [slips hand underneath his shirt] I'll think of something.
Kurama: [grins] Oh, I'm sure you will.
Hiei: [licks Kurama's neck as he strokes his stomach]
Kurama: [softly] In a second, I won't be able to stop myself from screwing you here and now.
Hiei: [smirks wider] Sorry.
Kurama: [kisses him deeply]

>Kurama sighed. "Can't you figure it out on your own?"
>The sanjiyan flinched slightly. "Maybe, but I've never had the opportunity. Generally not being able to use my ki has meant I get captured. Especially since I don't know exactly when the change will happen. I was only able to do research on the change this time around."

Koenma: Captured?
Yuusuke: Oh, crap...
Kurama: [holds Hiei tightly]
Hiei: [shifts] You mentioned something about paying too much attention to the fic?
Kurama: [groans, hides his face in Hiei's neck]

>"Captured for what?" Kuwabara asked hesitantly.
>He looked away. "Tear gems, female body, slavery. If I couldn't escape during the month, when I changed the wards they used were worthless. And I killed whoever held me captive."

Yuusuke: Slow and painfully, I hope.
Kurama: Agreed.

>"That's terrible!" Botan looked horrified. Yuusuke and Kuwabara looked shocked as well. Only Kurama seemed to take the information in stride.

Hiei: Well, he's lived in the Makai. He knows how things are.
Kurama: [softly] I know... But I don't want to think about it happening to you.
Hiei: [pets his hair] I know.
Kurama: [softly] And I won't ever let it happen to you, either.
Hiei: [mildly] Kurama, I *can* take care of myself.
Kurama: [smiles] And I plan to help.
Hiei: [smiles back]

>Hiei shook his head. "Part of living in the Makai, being youkai."
>Yuusuke scowled. "So that's why the threat Koenma made freaked you out." Hiei didn't answer, but that told them enough. "Oh, he's going to get a nice little talking to when we get back."

Hiei: [Yuusuke] And a spanking. Lots of spankings.
Yuusuke: [blushes] Oi!
Kurama: You know, we haven't teased them in a while.
Hiei: I miss it.
Kurama: [giggles]
Koenma: [rolls his eyes] My clone deserves a talking to anyway, depending on the threat.

>"Doesn't matter." Hiei finished off a fruit. "I'm stuck here. Maybe I can figure things out along the way. Otherwise I'll be pretty worthless in battle. Can't even use the Jagan."

Hiei: Oh, sure. Just announce your weakness to the world.
Yuusuke: "Somebody in the Makai didn't hear you."
Hiei: [snorts]

>Kuwabara shook his head. "You're good with a sword."

Yuusuke: [laughs loudly]
Kurama: Oh, you have no idea, fic.
Hiei: [leers] Mmmm... Swordplay.
Kurama: [leers back]
Hiei: [drawls loudly] This fic better end soon, before we become exhibitionists.
Yuusuke: You weren't already?
Hiei: [kicks him]
Yuusuke: Itai!
Xellos: [softly] Well, it might be more interesting than the fic...
Kuwa: Not to me!
Xellos: [giggles]
Zelgadis: [smirks] Sadist.
Xellos: [winks]

>"Not in this body," Hiei replied shortly. "My body moves differently, like the center's off a bit. I think it's the breasts, but the hips are weird, too. And the breasts are too big. They flop around."

Yuusuke: Boing, boing, boing...
Lina: They hurt when they do that.
Yuusuke: You know, Keiko told me that once...
Kuwa: [snickers]
Yuusuke: No, really. She walked in while I was watching Slayers and Amelia was doing her justice posing with her boobs flopping and she said, "That'd hurt if it was real."
Zelgadis: [chokes]
Xellos: [falls over laughing]
Hiei: Masochist, maybe?
Kurama: She's probably just trying to get Zel to notice her.
Zelgadis: [looks surprisingly pale]
Xellos: [pokes his nose]
Zelgadis: [blinks at him]
Xellos: What's wrong?
Zelgadis: [softly] It's just... I don't know how I'm going to tell her. About us, I mean.
Xellos: She has no claim on you.
Zelgadis: [shakes his head] It's not just that. I don't want her to hate me...
Xellos: [cheerfully] She'll just rant at you about the injustice of evil, since she'll start associating you with me.
Zelgadis: [winces]
Xellos: [still cheerfully] She'll probably also chide you when I do something she doesn't like, like you control me or something.
Zelgadis: Heh. As if being in love with me gives you some sort of leash. That's a laugh.
Xellos: [grins] Besides, it'd be fun to get her goat.
Zelgadis: [sighs] I value her friendship, Xellos.
Xellos: [blinks] You won't lose it.
Zelgadis: You're sure of that?
Xellos: No. But if she really is your friend, she won't break away for such a silly reason.
Zelgadis: I hope so... [sighs again]
Lina: I can't imagine Amelia saying, "Well, you fell in love with Xellos, so we can't be friends."
Zelgadis: [snorts]
Xellos: See?
Zelgadis: [nods] I guess.
Xellos: Besides, she had several years to say something. Her loss, my gain.
Zelgadis: [brushes his cheek] Smug bastard.
Xellos: [grins] I think I have reason to be smug.
Zelgadis: [smiles, blushes]

>Kuwabara and Yuusuke blushed deeply. "Too much information," Yuusuke managed.

Yuusuke: Prudes.
Hiei: [laughs]
Kurama: Your clones are probably just turned on and embarrassed by it. Perpetual teenage hard-on and all...
Yuusuke: [nods knowingly] Get hard if the wind blows...
Koenma: And embarrassed to think of a teammate that way. Er. The clones, anyway.

>Hiei rolled his eyes. Botan giggled. "Hiei, the binding should help with the first. And I'm sure along the way you can spar a bit to get used to the differences."

Hiei: How's binding going to help with big hips?
Yuusuke: [snorts]
Kurama: I like your hips.
Hiei: [smirks] I know you do.
Kurama: [leers] I like that entire area of your body.
Hiei: [leers back] I know that, too.
Kurama: [sucks Hiei's neck]

>"In any case, we should get moving," Hiei said. "The fight last night means they're looking for us around here." He got up unsteadily and shoved the remaining fruit in his pocket. As the others packed up, he turned to Kurama. "Do you have any elemental wards? Or can you fix some up?"
>Kurama frowned. "Elemental wards? I could, but why?"

Yuusuke: [Hiei] I feel kinky tonight.
Hiei: [hits him distractedly] Baka.
Xellos: I bet it's the kokoryuha.
Kuwa: Eek.
Hiei: What about it?
Xellos: [grins] Iya. I have it by personal authority that dragons *hate* water, especially cold water.
Zelgadis: [snickers]
Lina: [gives Xellos a look] You used to drown Golden Dragons didn't you?
Xellos: [sweatdrops] Sore wa himitsu desu.
Zelgadis: [snickers more]
Yuusuke: Here I was thinking pranks on Filia.
Xellos: [smirks evilly] I can't wait to get home.
Lina: Oi...
Xellos: Yes, Lina-san?
Lina: We're not supposed to bug her. You know, with Val.
Xellos: True, true.
Lina: So don't even think about it.
Xellos: Yare, yare.

>Hiei held up his right arm, and Kurama noticed with alarm that it was smoking slightly. "It's the dragon. Fire and ice don't mix. The elemental ward should... do something..." He looked away.

Xellos: [way too cheerfully] Told you so.
Hiei: None of us were arguing with you.
Kurama: Except that it wasn't because it was a dragon.
Xellos: The similarities are on a spiritual level as opposed to surface resemblance.
Hiei: Technicalities. Let's get on with it.

>"Oh, Hiei. Why did you get that move if you knew this would happen?" Kurama went through his bag, looking for the proper supplies.

Kurama: [blinks] I think we had this conversation... Well, not exactly like this but one like it.
Hiei: [blinks] We did?
Kurama: [frowns] Or I tried to talk to you about it at the time and you brushed me off. Can't remember.
Hiei: [kisses him] If I brushed you off, I'm sorry.
Kurama: [smiles softly] Don't worry. So late after the fact, it hardly matters. Besides, you had a lot on your mind.
Hiei: [leans against him]
Kurama: [kisses his forehead] I *was* worried about you, though.
Yuusuke: We all were. He was engulfed in flames and his arm was all toasty afterwards.
Hiei: That *did* hurt. It was a stupid thing to do, but I really didn't want to deal with a real fight with that guy.
Kurama: I know. [pets his hair]
Hiei: Not that I would've lost. It just would've been tiring and I'd have been more injured than I was.
Kurama: [smiles] You like ending it quickly. I've always understood that, you know.
Hiei: [smiles] I know. But I'm not masochistic.
Kurama: I know.
Hiei: [grins] I know you know.
Kurama: [giggles]

>"If I hadn't, I wouldn't have survived the tournament."

Hiei: And it's come in handy since then.
Yuusuke: Very. Especially against the Netherworld.
Hiei: [smirks darkly] I can't wait to use it on a certain somebody now...
Xellos: [grins darkly]
Lina: [cracks her knuckles] I haven't cast the Dragon Slave in weeks. Wouldn't like to think I'm getting rusty. [winks at the boys]
Yuusuke: [grins] A good fight would be fun.

>Kurama pulled out some ward paper and extra bandages and wrote on it, instilling some ki in the paper. "I'm making it fire specific, so it won't hamper you." He moved forward to attach the ward, and Hiei backed away slightly before letting him.

Hiei: Tch. Still paranoid?
Yuusuke: Probably the ki signatures.
Koenma: Still warding his arm, no matter what universe.
Kurama: Hm?
Koenma: You're always the one putting the ward back on Hiei's arm.
Kurama: [blushes] Yes.
Yuusuke: [smirks] Well, Hiei probably wouldn't trust the rest of us to do it right.
Hiei: [shrugs] Kurama's generally the only one organized enough for that kind of thing. Plus he knows wards better than you.
Yuusuke: Not arguing that.

>After that was taken care of, Hiei stuffed his cloak into the black bag and shouldered it. Kuwabara handed him his katana, and he attached it to his back as well.
>They headed out toward the center of the forest.

Yuusuke: [pauses] Hey, are we done?
Kurama: Thank *God.*
Lina: We should probably find that new room before anything else.
Hiei: Damn.
Koenma: She's right.
Hiei: [grumbles]
Kurama: [hugs him] You should probably rest anyway.
Hiei: [struggles not to yawn] Maybe.
Kurama: [smiles] No maybes about it. You're exhausted from the Recovery spell. Sleep first, then a nice, leisurely shower...
Xellos: [brightens] Zel-bunny, that means we get it first!
Zelgadis: [chokes]
Lina: [snickers]

-

It didn’t take long to find an appropriate room. Hiei had recalled a part of the structure with larger spaces between the doors, and they found some very large quarters to accommodate them. It consisted of one very large room with a kitchen area, living space, and sleeping space, with a separated large bathroom. Xellos was vocally disappointed that there was no bath, but the shower was large enough for two.

Unfortunately, there were only two large beds, so Kuwabara, Yuusuke, Xellos, and Zelgadis were put on duty to acquire three more, while Lina and Koenma stayed with Hiei and Kurama.

Hiei, despite his protests that he wasn’t tired, fell asleep almost immediately when Kurama tucked him in. “Is that normal?” he asked Lina softly, sitting beside the slumbering fire demon.

Lina nodded. “He wasn’t just worn out from that Recovery. He ran down our hallway four times, and this isn’t a small space we’re in. He was probably trying to avoid our corridor to protect us, too.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he ran ten miles,” Koenma added. “He looked pretty bad off when he slipped.”

Kurama didn’t respond. Instead he lay down and embraced Hiei, kissing his temple gently. He settled in to nap with the sanjiyan, his stress and worry catching up with him.

Lina smiled, then turned to Koenma. “Let’s get some sort of food up. I’m starved.”

Koenma rolled his eyes. “Let’s hope there’s food here. Otherwise we’ll have to send the boys out to rummage again.” Lina moaned pitifully in response.

Thankfully, there was food.

*

Keiko hadn't actually met Mukuro before now, but she had heard a lot about her through Yuusuke and Kurama. Even so, nothing could have prepared her for actually seeing the woman. She had a presence about her that was intense and dangerous; it was easy to see how Hiei had been drawn to her. Keiko was glad she had been to the Dark Tournament suddenly-she was used to strange looking demons and so didn't stare too openly at Mukuro's right side. Especially since the demon was currently on the war path.

All of them were worried about the boys' (and Lina's) disappearance, but Mukuro was absolutely *furious.*

Also like all of them she kept up with the MST (yes, the Makai had internet services) and was generally amused by them. Unless Hiei was being tortured. Keiko, along with Botan, Shizuru, Yukina, and Genkai, watched her angrily pace the dining room in Genkai's temple. Mukuro had gone to the Reikai immediately after reading to chew Enma a new one-as Botan told it-and Botan had brought her here.

"This is the second time the Reikai has fucked up," she seethed.

"Mukuro-san, I know how you feel," Yukina spoke up quietly, "but there's nothing we can do, is there?"

Mukuro stopped and glanced at her heir's sister. Those same red eyes stared up at her with such a worried expression—worried for Hiei—that she couldn't help but calm slightly. "I'll find a way," she guaranteed the young Koorime. "I'm not just going to stand around in the background this time."

"Enma-sama is doing everything in his power to get them back," Botan tried, and shrank back when the woman turned to her.

"I highly doubt that," Mukuro replied sardonically.

Genkai nodded solemnly. "Enma is an incompetent when it comes to the Meikai."

"Genkai-san!" Botan objected.

"What? It's true."

Then, a voice interrupted before the azure-haired girl could respond. "Yare, yare. He was here but it seems I've missed him."

Everyone turned to see a blonde woman standing in the room where a moment ago there had been nothing. Her skin was tanned, hair cropped short, and she wore a top and leggings straight out of a fantasy movie. Either cosplayers were gathering at Genkai's temple or this was someone from Lina, Zelgadis, and Xellos' world. Genkai had a good guess as to who it was.

When she noticed the attention on her, the woman smiled, purple eyes gleaming playfully. "Yo." She looked at all of them, studying them, but her eyes lingered the most on Mukuro. "Got a fag?"

"I'm trying to get mine back, thanks." Mukuro seemed unimpressed by the visitor's sudden entrance.

The blonde laughed. "I am Beastmaster Xellas Metallium, Xellos' master." She didn't have a doubt that these people would know who he was, and it was confirmed by the dawning realizations on the ladies' faces. "I followed my servant's trail here, but after this point it seems to have gone cold."

"Unsurprising," Mukuro told her, and explained curtly what had happened to Xellos.

Xellas' mysterious, unearthly smile never left her face. "Oh dear. He always gets into the most interesting trouble." She chuckled lowly. "I suppose I'll have to rescue him."

"That's going to be easier said than done," Shizuru said, lighting a cigarette, then grudgingly giving Xellas one when she asked. "No one knows where they are."

"Well, we know they're on a lunar base," Genkai added, folding her hands in front of her. "Other than that…"

"In outer space, you mean?" Xellas asked and when Genkai nodded she smiled wider. "Well, that's easy! Can you tell me anything else?" She didn't seem to find it at all odd that they knew so much about where the Tantei and Slayers were, yet were unable to rescue them.

"There's a holy barrier surrounding the exterior of the base," Mukuro said. "It's strong enough to hold Xellos in. Apparently, he ran into it head first."

Xellas looked startled then. "Oh, so that's what that was… Silly boy. You'd think he'd learn to look first before jumping."

Mukuro snorted knowingly. "They never do."

Xellas giggled. "Well, all I have to do is look for a strong magical barrier. It won't take long."

TBC.


Chrissy: Heh. Well, I got to thinking that this would need more than one chapter to end it, so… Yeah. And in the past couple of months, I’ve kinda missed working on ETT. So there you go. Anyway, sorry this took so long.