Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Kesu ❯ Chapter Three ( Chapter 3 )

Chapter 3

Three weeks later...
Yuusuke

We're all worried about Hiei. Even Kuwabara. Hiei hasn't slept or eaten in over two weeks. The only reason he hasn't died of dehydration is because Yukina forces him to drink. He spends most of his time in a corner of the temple, sitting with his knees drawn to his chest, staring out into space with blank, dead eyes. His ruby-red eyes are sunken and the fire that used to blaze behind them is gone. He's getting thinner and more fragile each day. If something isn't done soon, I have no doubt that he'll die.

We've known for quite some time about his and Kurama's relationship, but none of us could've imagined that the youko's death would affect him so deeply. I don't know what to do, and neither does anyone else. Not even Genkai or Koenma.

I miss the old Hiei. Sure, he was kind of a jerk, but I still miss him. I've tried everything. He doesn't respond when we talk to him. I've even sicced Kuwabara on him, and he didn't respond. I sat there in front of him for hours on end, saying stupid stuff and insulting him. He responded to only one. And even then, all he did was look up and stare at me with those dead eyes of his. It's worse than when he would insult me back and make me look stupid. I'm starting to wish he would. That's when I realized that the old Hiei is gone, having died three weeks ago with Kurama. This new Hiei doesn't have the will to live, and probably won't live for very long. With Kurama's death, I have lost two friends.

Poor Yukina. She is taking this new turn of events hard. She sits beside Hiei for hours, trying to beg him to eat, and always failing. It's heartbreaking to listen to. She always manages to get him to drink, but only because he doesn't resist when she forces water down his throat. I sometimes hear her crying late at night, and I know that if Hiei kills himself like this, she'll soon follow. The Koorime's appetite is quickly disappearing as well.

I am sick of this. It is night, and everyone but Hiei and I are asleep. And Yukina. I can hear her crying in the other room. And I know Hiei hears it too. He can't help but hear it. I sit in front of him. He just stares through me, as usual, like he doesn't even see me. Something inside me snaps and I grab him and shake him violently. That gets his attention.

"You can hear Yukina crying; even you aren't that unfeeling. And you know that if you kill yourself, she'll do the same." He doesn't respond. I continue relentlessly. "She's stopped eating, y'know?"

That gets through to him. He flinches. His mouth opens and he speaks for the first time in two weeks. His voice is raspy from disuse. "I...don't care..."

I narrow my eyes. "Yes, you do. You know you do."

He just stares at me with his dead eyes. I'm the one who flinches this time. "No...I don't." He rises and stumbles to the window.

"Where are you going?" I ask angrily. He can't leave. Not with Yukina here.

He turns and looks at me. I avoid his eyes. "To the Makai," he answers.

My eyes widen. He's going there to die. Doesn't he care about Yukina? But I know the answer. He can't. He's too depressed to care about anything. "We'll follow you. You know that."

He sighs. A defeated sound. I never thought that I would think of Hiei, of all people, as defeated. "You will not be able to find me." With those words, he is gone.

I wake up everyone and tell them what happened. We have to find him, before he gets himself killed. It's my fault. I pushed him.

Yukina stops us from leaving. "He'll just find another way to kill himself. Let him go." We stare at her in shock. This is her brother that she's telling us to abandon. The little Koorime continues. "He's dying anyway. His soul is almost gone. Can't you feel it?"

It is then that I realize that she could feel her twin's grief through their link. I lower my head in sorrow. "She's right," I mumble. I know everyone is looking at me. "He's been dying since Kurama died. Just...let him go..." I trail off, unable to continue. I realize that I had been trying to keep him alive almost as a favor to Kurama. Kurama would not have wanted it this way. I'm sorry Kurama. I've failed...

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Just like Yuusuke...He blames himself for everything that goes wrong. Great team leader...