Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Mission: Stupidity ❯ The real problem ( Chapter 6 )

 

 

 

Disclaimer drama!! Hell's bells!

 

Hiei-I can't believe I was dragged to this damn wedding….and I have to sit in between shorty and dog boy….

 

Ed- Hey! You're just as tall as me you little bitch!!

 

Inuyasha- And I'm not the one who shocked a skunk and glued it to my head!

 

Kenshin- *Sobbing* This is so beautiful, that it is! *blows nose* I…I always cry at weddings, that I do! *sniff, sniff!*

Hiei+Inuyasha+Ed- Grrrrrrrrr….

 

Kyo- Thank God that kuso nezumi isn't here….

Ed- Where the hell did carrot top come from?!

Kyo- *Kitty hisses at Ed* Fullmetal shorty!

 

Kurama- Look, here they are!! And….is that Sesshoumaru as the maid of honor?!

 

Inuyasha- WAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

 

Ashley- I'm the other maid of honor!

Me- Yeah…they tied me up and pointed pogo sticks at my skull until I picked one so, I thought, why the hell not have both!

 

Priest- Do you Mr. Puppet take thee Demoness Rose as thine wife?

Mr. Puppet- I do!

 

Priest- And do you take him demoness Rose? Foreva and eva as long as you both shall live?

Me- *Bored and eating more nachos* Yea I guess…..man this blows…..

 

Kurama- I can't support this marriage!

Everyone- *GASP!!*

Me- ……*sleeping and drooling* ….They don't belong to me…….

TO BE CONTINUED!!!

 

Ed- AND I'M NOT FULLMETAL SHORTY WHO'S SO TINY IT MAKES YOU WANT TO SQUISH HIM INTO LITTLE DWARFY PANCAKES THAT EVEN A DUST MITE COULDN'T SEE TO EAT IT YOU BASTARD!!!!!!

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~I'm making all of my comments at the bottom of the page from now on!~

 

 

Chapter 5- The real problem

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“Okay guys, I think we should get down to business and start looking so we can get the hell outta here!” Yusuke said.

 

“But, didn't we already put the ducky in Hiei's pants?” Kuwabara asked stupidly. Before he could say anything else, Yusuke quickly covered his mouth and got sweat drops all over his head.

 

“Oh Kuwabara, heh, heh, you loveable oaf you!” He laughed nervously. Hiei looked in his pants and heard quacking noises. Then he looked up at Yusuke and Kuwabara with a look so fierce they fell down on their butts. It almost killed them, but hey, that's how Hiei's trademark death glare works right?

 

Kurama coughed to break it up before he actually began brutalization. “Um, what exactly are we looking for again?”

”I dunno, that baka Koenma didn't say, he was being vague.”

”Well, did he tell you anything about the item?”

”Uhhhhh……he said something like we'll know once we see it. Lot of help he was.”

”So, let's begin looking shall we?” Kurama suggested clapping his hands together. Just then, their favorite boss strode over to them.

 

“'Ey, great job guys, I expect good things from yous from now on.” He congratulated.

 

“Much obliged Shimo-sama.” Kurama bowed. “However, we are all a little tired from our excursions on the stage and what not, so we would appreciate it very much if we could have a small break.” He asked hopefully and politely.

 

Takkun raised a brow and stared at them from behind those thick black sunglasses. “A break? What is this, “break” yous is speaking of?” He moved his fingers to emphasize the word.

 

“You know-“ Kurama began, but got cut off by a rather hostile Yusuke.

 

“Look bitch, we need a god damn break! We're tired, we're straight, and we just finished dirty dancin' for a shit load of queers!” He fumed, grabbing Takkun's collar and lifting him up a couple of centimeters. “WE. NEED. A. BREAK!!”

 

Takkun calmly glanced at the boy's hands that were holding him up and then his eyes slowly shifted to Yusuke's eyes, almost expressionless and unshaken by his words. “Well, yous know…..I could just kick yous out for bein' insubordinate towards your boss man.”

“DON'T GIVE ME THAT BULL CRAP TAKKUN!” He yelled again shaking him. Kurama put a hand on his shoulder, and Yusuke lowered his voice into a soft growl. “Don't give me that. We've done what you told us to do. Hell, by powers unknown, you even got Hiei to follow orders! Now, all we ask, is that you give us a few minutes for a well deserved break!”

“Fine. Yous get 20 minutes and not a second later.” Yusuke put him down, and he straightened his shirt. “But I want yous ta still be in character.”

“Thank you Shimo-sama, thank you.” Kurama breathed. He began to walk away with the other guys, but Takkun stopped Yusuke.

 

“As for you…..you'd better make dat the best 20 minute break of ya life. Cuz when you come back here…..” He shook his head and walked away. “20 minutes.” He reminded him.

 

“Bastard, who the hell does he think he is?” Yusuke snorted and followed his friends.

So, I believe if we all split up, we'll find it faster.” Kurama declared.

 

“Yes, thank you captain obvious.” Hiei said sarcastically.

“Yusuke, may I see your communicator for a second?”

“Hm? What for?”

“I wish to ask Koenma something.” Kurama replied.

 

“Here.” Yusuke tossed the item into Kurama's hands, and the Kitsune called the toddler.

 

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AT SPIRIT WORLD…..

 

 

“Uh oh….Koenma sir, we have an incoming call from our boys….” Botan stated nervously.

 

Koenma's eyes darted around the room shiftily and he laced his fingers, and rested his elbows on his desk. “F-forward the call then!”

Botan pressed the button and quickly hid behind a plant. Koenma was all too relieved to see it was Kurama speaking and not the hormonal Yusuke. At least Kurama didn't like to raise his voice….

 

“Lord Koenma sir, I'm calling to ask about this item we are searching for.”

“Yes, and what about it?”

“I am aware we will know what it is when we see it, but does it give off some sort of spirit energy?”

Huh. Koenma had not thought of that…damn, why couldn't Kuwabara have called with some stupid question where he could make fun of him?

“Well?”

“It um, it does give off spirit energy……yes, but it-um-it masks it.”

“Meaning?” Kurama asked.

“Meaning, I put a masking spell on it before I brought it with me! If a demon was there and sensed the spiritual power it emits….they would rush me. So I put a small masking spell to lessen it's power!” He said confidently.

“But didn't you say that blue ogre was in this club using it?”

“Oh yes! I did didn't I….” His eyes made another tri around the room rapidly as he searched for a safety net to catch himself. “I'm sorry, I must be mixing clubs again, I've been to so many after all! I um……well, you see……” `How the hell am I gonna get out of this one….?!' He thought to himself. Suddenly, a flash of inspiration went off in his head. Oh yes, he had another idea….but this one was really risky, and would either have them think he was psycho, or make them hang up, come back to spirit world, and beat his ass. Probably the latter right now. He really couldn't afford a beating, he bruised like a peach! But now, time was running out, he was already stalling for about two minutes, which over exceeded standard stalling time! He could distinctly hear the sound of his own nerve endings in his brain start to deep fry and sweat was starting to form over his brows. There was only one thing left to do! His eyes watered up and he clenched his fists even tighter than before.

“RUBBER DUCKYYYYYYY!!!!!!” He cried.

 

“…………..”

 

“I ADMIT IT! BLUE OGRE WASN'T IN THE CLUB! THERE IS NO POWERFUL ITEM THAT EVERY DEMON WANTS TO GET THEIR HANDS ON!!!!”

On the other side of the communicator, the three boys crowed the screen. Hiei already had tiny anger marks popping up on his forehead.

 

Before they could scream at him, Koenma continued. “I WAS IN THE CLUB AND I BROUGHT MY FAVORITE RUBBER DUCKY WITH ME AND-AND- I WENT TO GO GET A DRINK AND I LOOOOOOSSST HIM!!!!!!” He wailed, banging his head on the desk repeatedly.

 

“………”

“I need my rubber ducky back! It's my security, my confidence…..MY LOVER!!!!!!!”

“……….”

“AND IF I DON'T GET IT BACK, I'LL FORCE YOU ALL TO TAKE HIS PLACE! WE'LL SLEEP TOGETHER, READ TOGETHER, AND YES, WE'LL BATHE TOGETHER!!!”

At the mention of bathing with Koenma, Hiei and Yusuke passed out, while Kuwabara thought about that for a while.

“A bath with Koenma……” He thought out loud.

 

“Ko-Koenma sir…..?” Kurama began, not sure of what exactly to say next.

“Kurama…..you believe me, don't you?” He begged. “And if any of you thinks of coming back here without my precious, I swear, I'll keep to my word and make you take his place for all of eternity! AND SOMETIMES I REALLY SMELL!!! And it's not as though you'll ever fill the void in my world without my ducky, so you'll all have to listen to me cry every night for my baby!!”

At this point, the only thing keeping Hiei and Yusuke in this world were two large respirators and oxygen tanks. The heart monitor beeped steadily.

 

“Lord Koenma sir, I can't say, that I'm not shocked by your actions right now, but if this rubber ducky is what keeps you sane, then, I promise, we will do our very best to find it for you. If we don't find it in a week, we'll come back though. But, we'll buy you a new rubber ducky!”

“O-o-okay….I guess that's acceptable. Kurama, you were always my favorite…” He sniffled.

 

“Thank you sir. Now, we only have about 15 minutes left for our break, so I'm going to start looking! Over and out!” He closed the communicator, disconnecting with Koenma.

 

Botan slowly inched out from her hiding spot with a pale face. “You didn't just do what I think you did………”

Koenma regained composure and wiped away excess crocodile tears. “I have absolutely no idea of what you're talking about Botan.” He swirled his large red chair around so he wasn't facing her, and secretly pulled out a small rubber ducky from his pocket, and gave it a light squeak.

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PLEASE DON'T LYNCH ME!!! I didn't mean to keep you waiting for updates! First it was the writer's block, and then I just kept on forgetting. I was gonna update sooner but then freaking school got in the way and my computer kept on needing my dad to fix it and crap! I'm just so sorry!! But now that I'm back in the swing of things, I'm really gonna try to update more frequently! Seriously! Okay, notes to my lovely reviewers!!

Eppy-dono~ Thank you so much for that 10 out of 10 rating! I LOVE YOU!! Oh and also for the helpful suggestion, I'm planning on incorporating it in my later chapters! I'M SORRY I DIDN'T UPDATE!!

Kitsuneluvuh~ Thank you! I'll try to put the girl in the next time he looses his clothes. (and it will most likely happen again…) By any chance, would that brown haired, glasses wearing girl be you? Just asking!

Okay, so I will update very soon, I promise!!! Okay, I hope this chapter made up for everything!!