Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ My Will or My Fate ❯ New Life ( One-Shot )

I've had some random ideas floating in my mind for the past week or so and finally decided to type them up into a One-shot. If I get enough people telling me to keep writing it I will but otherwise this is just to get the idea out of my head so I can make room for other stuff.

 

Summary: An old friend of Genkai fears his time on Earth is nearing its end and travels from Hokkaido to Tokyo to leave his young charge, Dessin, 16, with her. Dessin suffers from amnesia and cannot remember a whole 5 years of her life. Her guardian told her she was in a car accident, and her injuries certainly could have been from a car accident, but something is nagging at her mind that that's not the truth. Can she uncover the truth before she puts the whole of Tokyo in danger?

 

I have a lot of ideas for this story and where it could go, but I want to see if anyone is actually interested in reading it before I take the time to write it. There will be no romance in this story so don't ask.

 

This takes place after the show is over. I know the ending yet I haven't seen it. I'm a bad girl and I read episode guides before I should. So there may be spoilers.

 

So on with the show:

 

My Will or My Fate

 

 

“So, what's this Genkai like, Pops?” An ashen haired teenage girl asked.

 

“She's a very strong-willed, won't-take-crap-from-anyone, kind of person. You'll get along great.” An elderly man answered.

 

“And what are you implying by that, might I ask?” The girl asked.

 

“Nothing, nothing at all.” The man laughed.

 

“Right. So how much further is her place from here?”

 

“Genkai's temple is right up those stairs.” He said pointing across the street to a staircase that looked as if it went on forever.

 

“Great.” The teen responded sarcastically.

 

“Come on, Dessin. They aren't going to go away by just looking at them.”

 

The aforementioned teen, Dessin, heaved a sigh and picked up the two duffel bags at her feet. Slinging then over each shoulder she trudged after Pops.

 

Dessin has short ash colored hair (natural color), spiked in all directions and looking like she just woke up. She has bright green eyes flecked with yellow and brown. Her skin is a tan olive color. She wore black cargo's with neon orange stitching and a neon orange tank top, and to complete the outfit, a pair of high top Converse sneakers in the original black. Dessin is short, only reaching 5' 1”, with an athletic build. She was on the track team at her old school and had a toned body from working out all the time.

 

The man with her is named Pops. He stands at 5' 10” and has salt and pepper colored hair, cropped close to his scalp. He has brown eyes and tan olive skin like his charge. He wore khaki colored slacks, a black tee-shirt, and sneakers. Like his charge, he has a very athletic build, and would often help pace Dessin for her races.

 

They finally reached the top and Dessin dropped the bags from her shoulders. She wasn't breathing hard as they had walked the stairs at a leisurely pace but the bags were heavy. She had practically her whole life in them, for crying out loud!

 

“LAY OFF ME, YOU OLD HAG!”

 

“What was that?” Dessin asked.

 

“Don't know. Want to find out?” Pops answered.

 

“Why not?”

 

Dessin grabbed her bags and threw them onto what looked like the front porch and jogged to catch up with Pops who was already disappearing around the corner. They walked about half way around the temple before coming upon a courtyard where a tall boy, about Dessin's age, with slicked back black hair and brown eyes, wearing a green school jump suit, sparring with a short old woman with pink-gray hair and brown eyes.

 

“Whoa.” Was all Dessin managed to say.

 

Dessin looked to her right and saw three other boys, all around her age, leaning against a railing. One was really tall with bright orange hair in an Elvis kind of style. He had beady black eyes and wore a blue school jump suit. The one next to him was slightly shorter and had flaming red hair and bright emerald eyes. He wore a magenta school jump suit. The next guy wasn't so much leaning on the railing as he was standing on it. He wore all black and had spiky black hair with a white star burst, and he had blood red eyes. He looked to be about the same height as Dessin.

 

“Why can't you torture someone else for once?” The boy fighting yelled.

 

“I think I will.” Answered the old woman.

 

The old woman turns her sights on Dessin and picks up two small rocks. She throws both in the blink of an eye. Dessin miraculously dodges the first and catches the second.

 

“Freaking hell, lady! You trying to kill me? Damn you throw hard.” Dessin yelled shaking out her hand.

 

“Dessin. Show some respect. This is Genkai.” Pops said reproachfully.

 

Dessin just gaped at him.

 

“Long time, no see, Pops. This your charge?” Genkai said.

 

“Yep. This is Lee Dessin. Say hello, Dessin.” Pops said.

 

“Hi...” Dessin replies.

 

Pops shakes his head and turns back to Genkai. “Sorry for intruding on your training session. Our train came early.” Pops apologized.

 

“I was just about to finish with the dimwit anyway. Excuse my manners, the dimwit is Urameshi Yusuke, the one in blue is Kuwabara Kazuma, the red head is Minamino Shuichi, and the goth is Jaganshi Hiei.” Genkai said introducing the boys.

 

At hearing their names they all came over to stand with Genkai and greet the newcomers.

 

“Everyone meet Pops and Lee Dessin. Dessin will be living here at the temple for a while. We should catch up Pops. Go get to know each other or something.” Genkai said before walking into the temple with Pops.

 

Dessin now had four boys staring at her as if she was a lab specimen. The red head speaks first.

 

“Hello. It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Lee.” He says politely and bows.

 

“Dessin is fine. Pleasure to meet you all.” Dessin responds, bowing as well.

 

“So you know martial arts, ne? There's no way you could have dodged the rock otherwise.” The one named Yusuke asks.

 

“Well, I really have no idea how I dodged the rock, or caught the other one for the matter. I just kind of knew that I had to move. I don't know a stitch of martial arts. Street fighting maybe, but not martial arts.” Dessin answered rubbing the back of her neck with her left hand, and sheepish look on her face.

 

“So why are you living with Grandma?” Yusuke asks.

 

“Pops says he's getting to old to take care of me properly. He sold his house and is moving into a home. I really don't know why though. I can pretty much take care of myself, but he insisted after he found out that Genkai would take me in.” Dessin answered.

 

“Where did you live before coming here?” Kazuma asked.

 

“Hokkaido, but I was born here in Tokyo.” Dessin answered. “OK now I have a question, how in the seven levels of hell can you move that fast?” The question was directed at Yusuke.

 

“Training. Lots of training.” Yusuke responds tiredly.

 

“Are all of you fighters?” Dessin asked looking at each boy in turn.

 

“Yup! I'm the number one punk at Sariaski High!” Kazuma all but yelled then kneels down in front of Dessin and takes her hand. “Would you be my girlfriend?”

 

Everyone, including Hiei, anime crashes. Dessin and Yusuke recover first.

 

“You've got Yukina, you moron!” He shouts while hitting Kazuma over the head.

 

“Itai! Why'd you have to do that, Urameshi?” Kazuma yelled back.

 

The two got into a fist fight. Dessin developed a sweat drop and laughed weakly.

 

“Don't worry you'll get used to them.” Shuichi assured her.

 

“Is that healthy?” Dessin quipped before slapping a hand over her mouth. “Oops. That slipped.”

 

Shuichi had his hand covering his mouth has he tried to contain his laughter and Hiei smirked.

 

“Is Pops you're grandfather?” Shuichi asked when he got control of his laughter.

 

“Nope. He was a friend of my dad's and he was asked to be my godfather. I never had a godmother so when my parents died he took me in.” Dessin answered nonchalantly.

 

“I'm sorry to hear about your parents. I didn't mean to dredge up hurtful memories.” Shuichi apologized.

 

“Don't be. My mother died in child birth and my father a month before I was born in a boating accident. I cannot be sad over something I never knew. Besides, Pops is enough parent for anyone.” Dessin retorted.

 

He chuckled at that. Then turned to watch Yusuke and Kazuma fight some more.

 

 

“I cannot thank you enough for taking in Dessin, Genkai.” Pops said following Genkai into a sitting room.

 

“As long as she doesn't make too much noise and pulls her weight, we won't have any problems. Now what was the 'issue' you told me about?” Genkai asked getting right down to business.

 

“Dessin suffers from amnesia. She can't remember from the time she was 10 till she was 15. I told her she was in a car accident but in reality it was something much worse. Koenma almost got involved. I kept him from calling in Yusuke by placing a binding on her but it will fade when I do. That is why I brought her here. If there was anyone who could stop her it would be you and the detectives.” Pops explained.

 

“What exactly did happen?” Genkai asked in a deadly serious tone.

 

“She joined a gang when she was 10 and learned to fight. She slowly worked her way up the ranks getting better and better. I tried to get her out when she was 15. Thats when I learned about her friends actually being gang members. She wanted to prove she could take care of herself and leaped into the lion's den. By then, she was high in the chain of command and when a gang war broke out she was right on the front lines, so to speak. Her gang was losing, badly. Many were dieing and she wasn't fairing so well herself. One of the younger girls that she came to look to as a little sister was gunned down before her eyes. Something snapped inside her. She killed everyone. Even the people in her own gang. I arrived to late to do anything except knock her out. I took her to the hospital and told them she had been in a car accident. When she woke up she didn't remember what happened for the last five years. I told her the same thing I told the doctors. At that time we didn't live in Hokkaido. We lived in Los Angeles. I lied to her and because she couldn't remember anything it really didn't matter. I made up 5 years of her life. I wonder if shes going to wake up and remember everything one day, and hate me for it. But I had to.” Pops continued.

 

“You said Koenma was going to get involved? Why?” Genkai asked.

 

“There was no way a normal human could do what she did and still be alive. I've never felt anything demonic about her but there must be something.” Pops answered.

 

“Hm. I will do what I can to uncover her secret. Maybe Koenma knows something.” Genkai responded.

 

“Thank you again, Genkai.”

 

“No problem, old friend. Take care of yourself.”

 

The two stood and made their way back out to the others.

 

 

“They have been fighting for ten minutes. When are they going to stop?” Dessin asked from the grass.

 

“Right now.” Shuichi answered.

 

“Huh?”

 

Dessin looked towards the temple to see Genkai and Pops emerge. Genkai looked ready to pound someone, and it looked like it was going to be Yusuke and Kazuma. Poor guys, they never stood a chance.

 

A few punches and kicks by Genkai later and the fighting was put to an end with Yusuke ending up sitting on his head under a tree and Kazuma on his back ten feet from Yusuke.

 

“Hn. Bakas.” Hiei mutters.

 

“He speaks. And here I was thinking he was a mute.” Dessin murmurs to herself.

 

“I'll be going now, Dessin.” Pops called.

 

Dessin jumped up and ran to Pops and hugged him tightly.

 

“OK there, Dess. The old man has to breathe.” He laughed.

 

“Sorry. I'm going to miss you. A lot.” She said into his chest, after loosening her grip.

 

“I'm going to miss you, too. Don't give Genkai a hard time. You won't like the consequences.” He added.

 

“I pretty much gathered that.” Dess laughed in return.

 

“I'll write as often as I can.”

 

“Me too.”

 

Dess finally released Pops and he held her at arms length. “You've look just like you're mother. I'm sure you'll make them both proud in whatever you do.”

 

He gave Dessin one final hug and left the courtyard.

 

Dess watched him go. “And so begins my life as a temple maiden.” She whispered before turning around when her name was called.

 

“Grab your stuff. I'll show you to your room.” Genkai said. “By the way, you start school tomorrow.”

 

“You have got to be kidding me!?”

 

 

“There is no way in the seven levels of hell that you can get me to wear that.” Dessin mumbled from her sea of blankets, looking at what Genkai had in her hands. It was a girls school uniform. It consisted of a white sailor style shirt with a blue scarf and a blue mini skirt.

 

“It's the uniform. If you don't wear it you'll get detention.” Genkai warned.

 

“Not like I haven't done that before.” Dessin mutters. “I'll just wear street clothes and snag a guys uniform from the office when I pick up my schedule and books.”

 

“Then you better start running or you'll be late.”

 

“Shit!” Dessin cried after looking at the clock.

 

It was 7:45 and school starts at 8:00. Should be a nice run.

 

Dessin jumped up from her pallet and practically attacked one of her duffel bags. Pulling out a pair of dark green cargo's and a purple shirt with black three quarter sleeves that had 'BITE' on the front, and 'ME' on the back in big white letters. Pulling on socks and her Converse sneakers she grabbed her backpack from the corner and sprinted into the kitchen.

 

Barely pausing to grab an apple she shouts over her shoulder, “Bye, Genkai!”

 

'I hate first days!' She thought as she sprinted down the steps and onto the sidewalk.

 

 

Dessin arrived with a couple minutes to spare. She walked through the front gates and every eye was immediately glued to her. Whispers sprang up around her. Dessin held her head high and almost made it to the front doors when someone called her name. She turned and saw Kazuma and Yusuke standing under a tree.

 

Dessin made her way over to them. It seemed even more whispers sprang up at this action.

 

“Hey, Dess. How was your first night at the temple?” Yusuke asked.

 

“Fine. This morning was another matter. Genkai tried to get me in one of those uniforms. Not happening.” Dess replied.

 

“Urameshi!” Someone shouted.

 

“Crap, its Takanaka.” Yusuke whined.

 

“Who?” Dess asked.

 

“The principle.” Kazuma answered.

 

“Urameshi, you have skipped detention for the past month and you still have yet to wear the proper school uniform. I'll have no choice but to call your mother.” Mr. Takanaka threatened.

 

“Yeah, whatever old man. Shouldn't you be focusing more on your new student?” Yusuke said, changing the subject.

 

“Oh! You must be Miss Lee. Do you know Mr. Urameshi?” He asked.

 

“We just met yesterday.” Dessin replied.

 

“Did you get a uniform when you registered?” He asked.

 

“Yes, but I will be needing a different one.”

 

“Does it not fit?” He asked.

 

“Something like that.” Dessin replied.

 

“Come with me and I'll get your schedule and books and a new uniform.” Mr. Takanaka said walking off.

 

“Kill me now.” Dessin utters as she trudges after Takanaka.

 

 

“So what classes you got?” Kazuma asks after Dessin comes back out of the office.

 

“See for yourself.” Dessin hands them the paper she was holding.

 

“You have the same classes we do, only you have... advanced science and math? Are you a brain?” Yusuke asks in horror.

 

“Only when it comes to math and science. Everything else is uncharted territory. Oh and PE. I'm good at sports.” Dessin answers. “Are the PE classes coed?”

 

“Nope. We'll have gym at the same time but you'll do different things than we will. Until gymnastics, then everyone is together. Thats when we spend PE on the roof.” Yusuke explains.

 

“You're cutters! I knew there was something I liked about you two.” Dessin replied.

 

RING!

 

“I believe that was the bell. Shall we head to social studies?” Dessin asked.

 

The two boys just grunted and led the way to class.

 

 

Dessin and the boys had made it through half a day and were now in lunch and the threesome was sitting under the tree from earlier. Unsurprisingly, Dessin has lost her appetite after watching Yusuke and Kuwabara shovel food down their throats.

 

“Yusuke!”

 

The teen looked up from his food and waved over a girl with brown hair held back in two pony tails and brown eyes.

 

“Dessin this is Keiko, Keiko this is Dessin.” Yusuke introduced.

 

“You must be the new student! Nice to meet you and thanks for dragging these two to their classes.” Keiko said taking a seat next to Yusuke.

 

“I guilted them into it, 'you wouldn't want to leave me wandering around the halls alone would you? Besides I live with Genkai remember?' They did anything after that one.” Dessin laughed.

 

“Wait, you live with Genkai?” Keiko asked, “I didn't think anyone but Yukina and Hiei ever stayed in the temple.”

 

“I just moved in. Who's Yukina? I didn't see her there.” Dessin said.

 

“She's away for a few days.” Keiko explained.

 

Dessin nodded her head in understanding. “So what classes do you have for the rest of the day?” She asked.

 

“I have PE next. What about you?” Keiko said.

 

“Me too. At least I'll know someone in the class. Well, besides those two.” Dessin said jerking her thumb over at the two human garbage disposals.

 

“Do you know how to play football?” Keiko asked. (A/N: In America it's called soccer.)

 

“It's one of my favorite sports. I haven't played since I was eight though, so I'm going to be really bad.” Dessin laughed.

 

RING!

 

“Time for PE. Come on you two.” Keiko commanded, grabbing Kazuma and Yusuke by the ears.

 

 

Dessin, having stolen a boys PE uniform that consisted of a white tee-shirt and blue long shorts, jogged out to the field with Keiko. The teacher looked like a college student. He was tall, with short blond hair and blue eyes. Almost every girl there was swooning at the sight of him. Dessin looked around at them and shook her head.

 

'Really now, close your legs and lets play some sports. I hate girls that go all gaga over a teacher.' Dessin thought disgustedly.

 

“OK girls, we're going to continue with football today, but first I believe we have a new student, Miss Lee, correct?” The teacher, Mr. Love, asks with a Scottish accent. (A/N: This was my PE teacher for the first quarter of this year. And this is pretty much what happened with some of the girls too. The Scottish accent gets 'em every time.)

 

“You can call me Dessin.” Dessin says from the back of the group.

 

“Alright, Dessin. Ever played football before?” Mr. Love asks.

 

“Yup. One of my favorite sports.” Dessin replies.

 

“Good, I won't have to explain it and we can put you right onto a team. First, though, I need a mile warm-up out of all of you. Get to it, the boys are already ahead of you.” Mr. Love orders.

 

Dessin and Keiko jog over to the track and start their four laps. On the fourth lap Yusuke and Kuwabara join them.

 

“Hello, ladies. Hey, nice legs, Keiko. Yo, Dess! You wanna race?” Yusuke called over.

 

“Why not?” Dess laughed and took off at a sprint.

 

“Hey!” Yusuke called and sprinted after her.

 

“Wait for us!” Kazuma called to them.

 

“Catch up, slow pokes!” Dessin shouted over her shoulder.

 

Dessin and Yusuke tied and Keiko beat Kazuma.

 

“Nice race you two. Did either of you ever think about joining the track team?” Mr. Love says walking over to them.

 

“Actually, I was. I ran track back in Hokkaido and was hoping I could still join the team here.” Dessin said.

 

“With a kick like that you'd be a great 800 meter runner or even a 1000 meters. I'll talk to the coach for you.” Mr. Love offered.

 

“Really? Awesome! How 'bout you, Yusuke? Or is track not your thing?” Dessin commented.

 

“Not my thing.” Yusuke replied with a laugh.

 

 

Dessin was placed on the same team as Keiko and was now playing half-back. Keiko was her partner on the other side of the field. For the time being they were pretty much standing around because their team had an awesome offense.

 

'Bored. Bored. Bored. Man the other team sucks. When are we going to get some challengers?' Dessin thought.

 

Her thoughts were answered when the forward of the other team got a break away. She came charging down the field with the ball.

 

“I got her!” Dessin called.

 

Dessin charged off to battle for the ball. She met the other girl head on and managed to knock the ball free. It bounced off the other girls shoulder and out-of-bounds. The other girl was knocked off her feet by the force of Dessin stopping her.

 

“What's your problem?” The girl on the ground yelled.

 

“Hey, sorry for knocking you down. I was just playing the game. Here, let me help you up.” Dessin said, extending her hand to the girl.

 

“No lemme help you!” The girl swing her legs around and knocked Dessin to the ground. She then jumped on Dessin and started to hit whatever she could. Dessin got her feet between her and the girl and launched her over her head. She then scrambled to her feet and turned to face the girl. By this time a crowd of boys and girls had formed and Mr. Love was fighting his way to them.

 

Dessin was sporting a nice black eye and a bloody nose. The other girl had nothing but grass stains on her shirt. Mr. Lover jumped in front of the other girl and Yusuke and Kazuma were at my sides, Keiko behind me.

 

“Calm yourself, Kawa! What's the meaning of this?” Mr. Love demanded.

 

“She needs to be put in her place and she knocked me down! She fouled me and no one did anything about it!” The girl, now identified as Kawa, yelled.

 

“It was a legal block! She didn't do anything wrong.” Mr. Love corrected. “I'm sorry Dessin but I need both of you to run another mile. After we stop that nose bleed that is.”

 

Dessin was led over the side of the field by Yusuke and Kazuma.

 

“I can walk just fine you know.” Dessin commented.

 

“Yeah, but we have to run another mile, too. So we'll run it with you.” Yusuke responded handing her a cloth to hold to her nose.

 

Dessin took the cloth with a smile and applied pressure to her nose. The bleeding soon stopped and they were off for their run.

 

“So what'd you do to make Kawa mad?” Kazuma asked.

 

“I stole the ball and knocked her on her ass.” Dessin answered. She was panting slightly and they had only ran a lap and half.

 

'Why do I feel lightheaded? She must have hit me harder than I thought.' Dessin shook her head trying to rid herself of the slight dizzy feeling she had. Which was the wrong thing to do.

 

“Dess, you OK? Dess? Dess!” Yusuke yelled.

 

Dess had fallen to her knees and was gasping for breathe. She tried to stand again but she fell into Yusuke's arms.

 

“Do you hear that?” She asked weakly between gasps.

 

“Hear what?” Yusuke asked. “You're not making any sense. Mr. Love! Kuwabara go get help.”

 

“Gun shots. I hear gun shots.” Dessin gasped out.

 

“What...?” Yusuke starts, but Dessin was out cold.

 

 

Yusuke, Kuwabara, Kurama, Hiei, and Genkai were sitting around a low table on cushions. Genkai was sipping quietly at a cup of tea as she listened to Yusuke recount what happened at school.

 

“Then she started talking about hearing gun shots and blacked out.” He finished.

 

“And she was fine before that?” Genkai asked.

 

“Well besides the shiner and bloody nose, yeah. She was panting a bit at the start of out run and then she collapsed.” Yusuke explains.

 

Genkai was silent for a bit then looked to Kurama, “Could you make her some kind of concoction that will ease her breathing because it still hasn't leveled out?” She asked.

 

“I'm sure I can.” Kurama replied.

 

“I'm going for a walk. If anything changes come find me.” Genkai said before exiting the temple.

 

“Did she look worried? Or was I imagining it?” Kuwabara asked.

 

“She was worried. But why is the real question?” Kurama agreed.

 

“There is more meaning to this situation then Genkai is letting on.” Hiei spoke up.

 

“Wanna live up to the name Detectives and find out what?” Yusuke smiled, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

 

“I'll admit I'm curious to know about this girl. Youko too.” Kurama added.

 

“I'm game.” Kuwabara agreed.

 

“Hn.”

 

“Thats settles it. Lets solve a puzzle.” Yusuke cheered.

 

 

Dessin sat in a big open field with nothing but soft green grass surrounding her. She sat with her legs crossed and her hand resting lightly on her knees. Her eyes were closed and her breathing deep and rhythmic. A soft breeze ruffled her short spiky hair.

 

“Open your eyes, girl.” A cold voice said next to her ear.

 

Dessin's eyes shot open and she sprang to her feet. Turning around she saw a man with spiky midnight blue hair and cold gray eyes staring at her. He was wearing black baggy cotton pants and a dark green long sleeved shirt and black boots. He was at least a foot taller than her and an aura of malevolence and power radiated off of him.

 

“Who are you? Where are we?” Dessin asked.

 

“My name is of no consequence and we are in your mind. I have been trapped here for 16 years and I want out. The only way I can do that is through you. You need to kill more people and be arrested by the illustrious Reikai Tantei. Then I can get to my body and you can be lock in Reikai jail for the rest of your life while I take over the three worlds. Who knows? Maybe I'll make you my mate for being such a good host and not killing yourself and me.” The man said in the same cold tone.

 

“What are you talking about? Killing more people? I've never killed anyone. What is the Reikai Tantei? Who the fuck are you and why are you messing me?” Dessin yelled.

 

The man laughed. “I guess the binding the old man put on you really is working. That won't stop me, though. Every day I get stronger and I'll break free. Soon, girl. Soon you will see why you were made.” The man laughed again and dissolved into thin air.

 

As soon as he was gone the world around Dessin started to dissolve as well. Soon she was falling through the black nothingness of her mind...

 

 

Dessin woke with a start to see it was dark out. She lay on her pallet for a few second catching her breath, then slowly rose. The first thing she noticed was that she was wearing her PJ's. Someone had changed her out of her other clothes and she was now wearing a loose black hakama and some red cotton pants.

 

She slipped on her slippers and quietly left her room and wandered into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water then walked out to the porch surrounding the temple and took a seat. She leaned against one of the poles supporting the roof and stared up at the stars.

 

'The stars are so bright here. Since theres no way I'll get back to sleep after that wacked out dream. Even if I can only remember some creepy evil guy laughing, its enough to keep me up.' Dessin sighed. 'Stupid dreams...'

 

 

That's where I'm stopping. If you like it please review and tell me so that I can continue it. If no one wants me to continue, I'll scrap this and focus on my other neglected stories. This one has kept me from them, but now thats its out of my head and on the comp I can focus on my other works.

 

Any and all feed back is welcome!

 Raevyn out...