Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Second Best ❯ Chapter 1

Second Best

Everyone, I am trying my very best to get back into the swing of writing, so please…bear with me. And if you must flame…give me ideas on how to make this more to your liking. (Evil

Editor's note: But be prepared to be flamed back if you insult my grammar!! You have been warned!!)

Warnings: It's kinda short.

Disclaimer: Nope. Still not mine…never will be…'cause if it was…-thinks- Kurama would become a stripper and Hiei and Yusuke would be his loyal slaves…heh heh…sex slaves that is…

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It was night again. Two men touched and grabbed each other. Making love and moaning as they moved. The shorter one being Seme and the taller redhead as Uke. The only thing that bothered the shorter man was that he knew in his heart that his lover…was not making love to him…but was in fact making love to a distant memory.

"I know you loved him a long time ago\

Even in my arms you still want him I know\
But Darling this time let your memories die\

When you hold me tonight don't close your eyes\"

Every night it was the same. The shorter one was used to nurturing his love's desire; his love for another- even though it tore his soul to shreds. Used to feeling distant from his love no matter how intimate they were. Used to holding his love close after their loving, but never speaking. He had once… and it made his precious Kurama cry. The tears came because, once his lover spoke, the fox could no longer pretend he was what he really wanted- another who had been lost for ten long years now.

He cuddled closer to him. He loved smelling his own scent on the redhead. He just wished said redhead felt the same. It cut deeply, knowing he was, and always would be second best.

"Don't close your eyes\

Let it be me\

Don't pretend it's him in some fantasy\

Darling just once\

Let yesterday go\

You'll find more love than you've ever known\

Just hold me tight when you love me tonight\

And don't close your eyes"

How much he wished that one time…just once…Kurama would make love to him. One time to treasure in his heart forever.

Morning soon came and he saw his lover pretend to be in love with him. But he knew the truth...the only thing he was to the fox was a tool to help him live his dreams. The fox's love for the ghost in his heart would never fade.

He knew that no matter how tightly Kurama held him, the love would never be for him. He wished with all his soul that the love was meant for him, although he knew it would never be. But he could never give up on this dream, for his own love for the fox was too strong.

"Maybe I've been a fool holding on all this time\
Lyin' here in your arms knowing he's in your mind\

But I keep hoping someday that you'll see the light\

Let it be me tonight\

Don't close your eyes"

Months passed, then years. Nothing changed, nothing got better. He was still just a replacement.

Tears stung the back of his eyes as he decided what needed to be done. But he had sworn never to cry again. Steeling himself, and leaving just a note behind, he packed his things and left.

He needed to be needed...to be loved. He couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't be what he wasn't, not even for the fox who held his heart. He couldn't bow out to the phantom ever again. He couldn't be second best forever.

He could no longer stand just being a…a…a replacement.