Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Thinking Of You ❯ Tears ( Chapter 19 )

Thinking Of You

"Will you always love me?" you asked me quietly. I barely heard you speak. Did I hear what I thought I heard?

"Hn?" I replied. I wasn't quite sure what you had said. You nudged me, signaling that I should turn to face you. I did as you wished. I gave you a quizzical look.

"Will you always love me, Hiei?" you asked again. I stared at you in disbelief. When had I given you any indication otherwise? What had she said to you to get you so nervous? You weren't yourself.

"That's a stupid question," I replied. You looked hurt. I sighed.

"Kurama," I said soothingly. I ran my hand lightly over your cheek in a soft caress. You leaned into the touch. You hadn't been yourself all night. Even now you weren't yourself. How could a simple talking to end in such a depressed mood? What had she said? What could I do?

"Please… answer me," you said. I looked at you. Your eyes were filled with tears. I felt such a pain in my heart that I nearly cried at the sight of you in such a state. I wanted to pull you into my arms and sooth you. I wanted to cry. I wanted to tell you whatever was in my heart… but something held me back.

You had been miserable during the dinner. You had been off on your own, avoiding our friends and neighbors. I couldn't get you too participate in conversation. Normally, it was the other way around, but tonight all I got from you was an `hn' here or there. I was worried. You couldn't stop talking sometimes. Now you couldn't even speak. Something was bothering you and I needed to find out what it was.

We came home three hours ago, earlier than I had expected, and you immediately turned on the stereo. You played your Evanescence CD. You put on number 4.

"I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears.

But if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave.

Cause your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone.

These wounds won't seem to heal; this pain is just too real.

There's just too much that time cannot erase.

You cried. I'd wipe away all of your tears.

You'd scream. I'd fight away all of your fears.

I held your hand through all of these years.

Would you still hold me?"

Your voice echoed. It moved me. You seemed genuinely in pain. Your heart seemed to break as the words fell from your lips. Silent tears streamed down your face.

"You used to captivate me; by your resonating line.

Now I'm bound by the life you left behind.

Your face, it ruins my most pleasant dreams.

Your voice, it chases away all the sanity in me.

These wounds won't seem to heal; this pain is just too real.

There's just too much that time cannot erase.

You cried. I'd wipe away all of your tears.

You'd scream. I'd fight away all of your fears.

I held your hand through all of these years.

Would you still hold me?"

My heart started breaking. I couldn't stand seeing you in such pain.

"I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone.

Though you're still with me, I've been alone all along."

You span in a circle. As you fell to the ground I took you in my arms.

"You cried. I'd wipe away all of your tears.

You'd scream. I'd fight away all of your fears.

I held your hand through all of these years.

Would you still hold me?"

"I will always love you," you whispered. I stroked your back. You clung to me desperately. It was as if you thought I would disappear if you let me go. Your hands ran up my back. I looked down into your face. You kissed me. You kissed me three hours ago, and now I lay in your arms, just content to be there. Now I lay there, and you asked me if I loved you.

"Kurama," I began. Your eyes focused on me. "Kurama, it's hard for me to say exactly what I feel…"

Your eyes began to tear up. I continued quickly.

"But I'd do anything for you. I love you, Kurama. Nothing in the three worlds could make me stop. If you ever doubt me think back on now. I can't live without you. I wouldn't be able to live three minutes without knowing you were there. I am no longer able to pull away. I never wanted to pull away. I always wanted you to be the one. You were always there for me. You were the first one to care. You tended my wounds, both physical and mental. There was a time when I wouldn't even be able to face another person and hold a one minute conversation with them. You changed that. You changed me. I never want to go back to what I was before you. I want to love you. I want to be with you. And I'll stay with you for the rest of my life. Through the thick and thin, through the good times, and the bad. I will always be there for you. By your side. I will never leave. No matter if you spurn me. No matter if you tell me you no longer care. No matter if you cheat on me. No matter what you do, I'll be there. No matter what happens, I'll be there. Once you have gained my heart, there's no turning back. You are the other half of my soul. The other half of my being. You are part of me," I told you. My voice hurt, I had never spoken so much in my life. You stared at me in awe for a moment. You broke down. The tears flowed freely down your cheeks. Sobs wracked your fragile frame. You cried out and latched onto me. I wrapped my arms around you, comforting you in your sorrow.

"What did I do to deserve you?" you cried. I smiled sadly.

"You were you. That was enough for me to fall," I replied. You cried out again. You held tighter to me. I clung back. My own emotions were rising to a higher level than I had ever experienced before.

"I love you so much!" you began. "I don't know what to do! I love you! But I don't want to hurt anyone. I want you..."

"Shh," I cooed.

"I just want to be happy with you. I want to live my life with you. I want to be with you. I don't want to miss a single thing. I won't miss a single thing. I won't, because you'll never get rid of me. No one will take me from you. No one will take your heart from me. You are mine, and I'm going to keep you. I love you so much! I love you. I love you…" you trailed off. I looked up at you. You were asleep. It was for the best. Hopefully you will be better in the morning.

Hi. Er… long time no write. I had a bit of writers block, cause I didn't know what to write for this chapter. Now I know. I hope you guys like it. I'll hopefully be updating more often now that I'm past my block. I promise more chapters, unless y'all don't want any. Well, please review!