Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Vital Allies, Valuable Friends ❯ One-Shot

Hiei scowled at the Ningenkai from his perch at the top of a telephone pole, watching as the drama of ningen life played out before him as night fell. Ningens . . . Annoying little creatures . . . They're like insects. They're everywhere and they get into everything . . . He sighed in annoyance. And it was where he was stuck until he finished his parole. The fire demon scowled. It wasn't like it mattered . . . He had no life in the Makai either. And, though he would never admit it, life was actually somewhat better in the Ningenkai. There were no enemies to constantly have to defend against, and it was easier to steal what he needed in the Ningenkai. Kurama's lucky. If I were ningen . . . Hiei beat down the traitorous thought angrily. Kurama has turned weak. His life here has made him soft.

They youkai sighed and left his perch, opting instead to land in his tree to settle down for the night. He frowned as lightning lit up the sky. Hiei cursed. Lightning plus sleeping in a tree was not a good idea. In fact, during a lightning storm, it was best to avoid high places entirely--something he'd learned from a not-so-pleasant experience with such things. The fire demon jumped down from the tree and ran under an outcropping of a building, which he considered much safer than beneath a tree. Hiei frowned angrily. I hate storms . . . He needed sleep. Depriving himself of sleep for a night could mean the difference between life and death in a battle. However, he needed a safe place to sleep, which meant Kurama. The youkai growled in annoyance. The fox of legend was nothing more than an uber-genki ningen teenager, and it was disgusting to see how far the great thief had fallen. Lightning flashed again, followed by a clap of thunder that made Hiei flinch and helped him make up his mind. As he sped toward Kurama's, he could think only one thing. I really hate storms . . .

Kurama smiled at Hiei as the fire demon entered his room through the window, his grin telling Hiei that the youko had been expecting him. Hiei ignored it, though it pissed him off. He was becoming predictable. Predictability meant he was becoming soft. The fire demon made a mental note to go hunt down some illegal demons for Koenma at the earliest convenience to hone his survival skills. He scowled, wondering how long it would take before there would be none left for him to hunt, thus surrendering him to grow as soft and feeble as a ningen.

Hiei glared at Kurama, wondering how it was that the fox's face hadn't torn in two from his disgustingly wide grin. For some reason, the fox always acted happy to see him. Hiei remained crouched on the windowsill, pointedly annoying the moronic youko. Kurama gave in and greeted him. "Hi, Hiei. Looks like it's going to storm, ne?" Hiei ignored the question, and Kurama continued speaking, not having expected an answer. "I'm guessing that means that you need a place to stay?" Hiei shot the fox a "No, really?" glare, which the fox ignored as he continued speaking. "Well, you're welcome to stay here for the night."

Hiei grunted an assent, sensing that Kurama wasn't going to let him get away without some sort of a reaction this time. "Whatever."

The fox smiled maddeningly. "You're welcome, Hiei."

The fire demon clenched his teeth. What the hell was Kurama's problem? Why couldn't he just understand that his attempts to be friendly were in vain? A warrior doesn't need friends. They get in the way and betray. The same small part of his mind that he'd thought he'd beaten into submission piped up again. No man is an island. Hiei beat the thought into submission again, somewhat disturbed by the idea that his mind was talking back to him. He vaguely realized that Kurama was speaking to him. "What?"

Kurama's eyebrows raised. "I asked if you were hungry."

Hiei frowned. While he wanted to say no, he really was hungry . . . And, as with sleep, a meal could mean the difference between life and death. K'so . . . "Hai," he muttered reluctantly.

Kurama stared at him as if he'd grown a second head, obviously having not expected the answer, but he got over it quickly. "Alright, what would you like?" Hiei returned the stare that he had received. Kurama laughed. "Right. Something edible. Be back in a bit."

The redhead left the room, and Hiei sat on the windowseat, staring out the window as it began to rain. Stupid storm . . . Kurama was back within a few minutes with what were evidently leftovers from his family's dinner. Hiei ate sullenly, one of the few things he knew about ningens popping into his head as he did so. Ningens showed how much they cared about one another by imposing on their loved ones (1). K'so . . . I'm imposing. He hated depending on anyone, and hated having to remember all the stupid ningen customs that Kurama followed. The fire demon finished his meal quickly, and Kurama set the dishes aside to take down later.

"How was your day?" Hiei ignored the question. He didn't do small talk. Kurama seemed unfazed and began to tell the fire demon about his day. Hiei spaced out, gazing out the window at the violent sky as Kurama spoke, the fox's soft tone lulling him into a relaxed semi-asleep state. It was strange . . . Never before in his life had he felt welcome anywhere, but Kurama seemed to really enjoy his company and considered him a friend. It's . . . nice . . . Feeling wanted . . . Having . . . friends. Belonging somewhere. He was only partially been paying attention when Kurama said something that shocked him out of his reverie. "What?!"

"You're beautiful," Kurama repeated, smiling slightly. "You looked so peaceful just then . . . Like you were truly at peace and almost . . . content. It was really beautiful, to see you so at peace."

The smile disappeared as Hiei muttered the first thing that came to mind. "Liar." The youkai immediately cursed himself for saying it and revealing more about himself than he had planned. He knew that Kurama had to be lying. Him? Beautiful? Hardly. He was just an unwanted, runty, half-breed Forbidden Child--someone people looked at with disgust, or not at all. Never beautiful.

The fire demon didn't realize that Kurama had moved until the kitsune was right in front of him. He stood and stepped away, uncomfortable with the fox's invasion of his personal space. "You really are beautiful . . . Don't you believe me?" Hiei didn't answer, so Kurama continued. "You know, Hiei, the first thing a person has to do to find happiness is to love them self." Hiei responded to the statement by looking away. Kurama gently forced Hiei to look at him. "Hiei, you are the most beautiful person I know, inside and out." The fire demon flinched, his eyes filled with disbelief. "I . . . I love you Hiei." Hiei backed away, his back hitting the wall as Kurama leaned closer and kissed him softly on the lips. The fire demon froze at the action, unfreezing as Kurama ended the kiss. Hiei shoved him away and fled.

Hiei ran, his mind whirling with confusion. When his mind had calmed a bit, he found himself standing at the top of the tree, his eyes closed as water ran down his face from the rain that was pouring down. Being high up was his way of relaxing and clearing his mind, but it wasn't working. What had just transpired had too much implication to not think about it. The soaking rain wasn't helping matters either. K'so . . . He jumped to a sturdy branch and sat, wondering what he should do.

What the hell is going on . . .? Hiei wondered, touching his lips with a trembling hand. Why the hell is he doing this to me? The fire demon sat on a sturdy branch, leaning his head against the strong trunk of the tree as he considered his feelings for the first time in a long while. He sighed. I don't love him . . . Not in the way he wishes. But . . . He's a friend. I trust him. The fire demon cursed himself for not realizing that he returned Kurama's feelings of friendship. Friendship . . . His stomach lurched as he thought of something. What if . . . Kurama always was just in love with me, and he never had any intention of being a friend? The youkai swallowed hard. What if . . . all he wanted was to bed me, and he was only setting up a ploy to gain my trust so he could do so . . .? Hiei pushed the thoughts away. They weren't something he wanted to deal with at the moment. Sleep was what he wanted. He would talk to Kurama tomorrow.

Hiei stared at the sky, frowning as the storm seemed to pick up. He was at the same dilemma as before. He needed a place to sleep. He didn't want to risk staying with Kurama; if the fox really only wanted to bed him, he wouldn't hesitate to, now that his request was out in the open. The youkai considered. There was no way in hell he was going to stay at the temple. Stormy nights tended to produce rather vivid nightmares, and he didn't want Yukina to hear something she shouldn't. Besides, Genkai was . . . weird. Every time she looked at him, it felt as if she was piercing through his mask effortlessly to look at his soul and the secrets and emotions buried beneath. It was disconcerting. Hiei sighed. That left either Yuusuke or the Fool, and there was no way in hell he was going to show any sort of weakness in front of Kuwabara. Yuusuke, at least, he could trust not to blab anything if he had a nightmare. The ningen also had the courtesy to tease him privately rather than in front of everyone. The Jaganshi sighed. Yuusuke it is . . . He flinched as thunder cracked immediately after a lightning bolt flashed across the sky, realizing he was in a high place and vulnerable. He jumped down, opting to take the low, safe route to Yuusuke's.

Yuusuke looked up from the manga he was reading as there was a sharp rap on his window. What the . . .? The only person who could knock on his window, five stories up, was Hiei, but that was unlikely. He glanced out the window, shocked when he found that it was, in fact, the youkai. He opened the window, glancing at the soaked fire demon. "Let me get a towel." He left the room, returning a few seconds later and handing the item to Hiei. "Give me your cloak so I can hang it up to dry." The fire demon complied silently, and Yuusuke winced as he saw that Hiei was obviously soaked. "Maybe you should change out of those wet clothes . . ."

Hiei shot him a strange look. "Why?" He used his ki to dry them easily.

"Never mind." Yuusuke rolled his eyes. "I take it you need somewhere to stay for the night to get out of the rain?"

"Hn."

Yuusuke took that to mean yes. "Is Kurama out of town or something?" Hiei shook his head, indicating the negative. Yuusuke raised his eyebrows. He knew that Hiei sometimes stayed with Kurama during bad weather. "Er . . . Not that you're not welcome, but . . . Why are you here then?"

"Hn."

Yuusuke frowned, noticing from years of translating Hiei-speak, that the inflection of the fire demon's voice had changed. "Did you guys have an argument?" He sounds almost . . . upset. For Hiei.

Hiei scowled inwardly. He wondered what Yuusuke meant by that, then beat the thoughts down as his rational mind made a comeback with the assertion that he was reading too much into the question. "Hn . . ."

That definitely means yes. "Did you want to talk about it?" Yuusuke winced as he said that. This was Hiei! Of course he wasn't going to want to talk about it. His eyes widened in surprise as Hiei seemed to hesitate. "Do you? You can trust me."

I already made the mistake of ignoring Kurama's wish for friendship . . . Hiei sighed heavily, sitting down on the floor. "I guess . . ." He felt stupid saying it, but he couldn't turn back. He'd feel even more like an ass if he did.

Yuusuke sat down facing Hiei, shocked by the fire demon's strange openness, but endeavoring to hide it. "Go ahead."

Hiei sighed softly. "I don't know . . ." He paused, not sure how to explain. "I was at Kurama's . . . but . . ." The fire demon took a deep breath, struggling with the concept of discussing his feelings with anyone--including himself. "He was talking, and he . . . said he loves me . . . and . . ." the fire demon trailed off, one hand reaching up absently to touch his lips.

The ningen raised his eyebrows. Kurama had kissed Hiei, obviously, and the fire demon was having a hard time dealing with it--as was to be expected from someone who ignored his emotions. Yuusuke sighed. "Well, I can't say I'm surprised by that . . . I was actually starting to wonder if you two had something like that between you." He noticed that Hiei didn't look at him. "So what do you think of that?" Hiei having a heart-to-heart with anyone is surprising enough, much less him having one with me. This is just weird . . .

"I . . ." Hiei paused. "That's the problem. I don't . . . really feel like that for him . . ." The fire demon sighed. "And . . . It makes me wonder if he ever truly wanted to be my friend or . . ." He trailed off.

"Or if it was all fake?" Yuusuke finished. Hiei nodded. Would Kurama really do that? The ningen rested his head on his palm, thinking. Well . . . He was the youko. It's possible, but I doubt it. He probably fell in love with Hiei after becoming friends with him. "I don't think that's what happened . . ." He quickly realized that most people would be disgusted by Kurama's action, but he had taken the news in stride. Interesting . . . And Hiei doesn't seem adverse to the idea . . . It's just that the feelings aren't there for him . . . "Have you talked to him?"

Hiei flinched, startling Yuusuke. "No. I . . . left."

Yuusuke felt the proverbial light bulb switch on. Not only was Hiei confused about that, but his pride was bruised because he had to retreat. "You should."

Hiei kept his gave riveted on the floor. "I will."

"When?"

"Tomorrow."

Yuusuke nodded, about to get up when he thought of something else. "Hey, Hiei?" The fire demon looked up. "Why did you talk to me? It's not really . . . normal for you . . ."

Hiei looked away again, his eyes distant. "I . . . didn't know what else to do. And . . . I guess I can trust you . . ." A loud clap of thunder rent the air, and the fire demon jumped slightly.

Yuusuke frowned. Hiei had just shown him a weakness, which was very strange. He's afraid of storms . . .? The ningen forced it from his mind. He had no business prying into Hiei's past. If his friend wanted him to know, he would tell him. "Well, anytime you need a friend, I'm here."

". . . Thank you . . ." Hiei's lips curved upward ever so slightly, and Yuusuke grinned at the expression and the words, knowing that they meant quite a bit, coming from Hiei.

~Owari~

(1) - That's really how it goes in Japan. Dun remember where I read that . . . Ah yes . . . Kame's "With Me" doujinshi.

I started writing this a long time ago. Originally it was going to be a fluffy Hiei-and-Kurama-get-together fic. But I decided to do a somewhat strange view of Hiei's psyche. Then, at the end, I decided that this is the reason for Hiei's words about friendship in the Sensui Arc. Hikari told me of the scene, and I wondered about Hiei's words. Evidently, I wondered so much that my subconscience urged me to write this. There will be no continuation of this fanfic. I leave you to draw your own conclusions and assumptions from this fic about what may have happened next.

This was originally entitled "Love Thyself," but I didn't think that fit the final version, so the name was changed.

This version is also slightly different from the first on I released, as Hikari-koi helped me with some of the things I didn't like . . . *snuggles her itooshi*

Ah, yes. The shameless self-advertisement. Want to find out when I update? So do plenty of other people, apparently. Email rosethorneupdate-subscribe@yahoogroups.com to be automatically added to my update mailing list. ^__^;; [/advertisement]