Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ What the YYH Gang Does Offset ❯ Randomness.... ( Chapter 5 )

DE: I'm back! And it's just me right now, because KK and TC are at camp! …or, they would be, but because I didn't get my lazy ass moving, they're back. And this would have been up a while ago, but after I started typing this on KK's new but crappy and old laptop, we saved it to a floppy disk so I could finish it at home, and obviously that didn't happen, because I'm here retyping it, because my computer wouldn't let me get to the file on the disk, so…here I am, retyping…hopefully this will work! Well, also considering TC and I are in skirts, KK"s in a silk top, and EBD's not here cause her parents are very evil, and my Japanese has expanded! ^_^ Anyways, we haven't been getting many reviews, so shame on you, people! Yeah, yeah…let me guess: y'all blame it on me, right? Well, I can't help it if I'm a lazy-ass! I've been busy, thought, too! Considering I have to study for school (I'm in high school, what do you think?!), Confirmation, and running around doing random errands for people, I'm actually quite deprived of time to work on fics! When I first started writing this, EBD and I decided that we should have this one be evil to KK and TC, since they left us! The only bad thing is, the two haven't even read this yet (and it's been about 2 months since TC got back, and one since KK got back from Chicago)… But they're going to kill me, anywayz. If I stop pissing off my step-dad, maybe I'll have more time for this stuff…and I'm typing really fast with a few errors, but obviously you can't tell! At least, I hope..and I know that in a few of the other offsets and stuff there are errors…that proves that I typed them by myself. The first like, three or so proves that TC, KK, and EBD were there to help me with my mistakes..and plese remember that this was written before KK and TC were back from camp…anywayz, I'm sure you guys want me to stop talking, because of all of my randomocity and rambling….

Hiei: You do that a lot.

DE: I know! ^_^

Hiei: Well, are you going to continue rambling or are you going to start the funniness?

DE: O_O HIEI USED A RANDOM WORD!!!!!!!!!

All: (run in and stare)

Hiei: O_o; I did not!

DE: (to everyone but Hiei) …denial… (to Hiei) YOU SAID FUNNINESS!!!!!

Hiei: (shrugs) So?

All: @_@

Hiei: >_>;;; I'll do the disclaimer so I can get out of here. EBD will pop in a few times, and she owns herself. TC's at camp, but she owns herself. DE is owned by many, and K-

DE: (smacks Hiei) STOP SAYING THAT!!!!!!!!!

Hiei: (has a red mark across face and glares at DE) Fine. DE is owned by Youko and herself, and KK isn't at camp. She's in my trailer, waiting for me. (starts to run off)

DE: (trips Hiei) KK'S another story, and she is too at camp!

Hiei: #_# [that's basically swirly eyes..]

=In Youko's trailer, DE, Youko, KK, Hiei, TC, Touya, Jin, and EBD are gathered, all watching Passions (IT'S A SOAP OPERA!!!!!!!!!!!)=

Ethan: (guy from TV) Theresa won't do anything to harm our baby, Gwen!

Gwen: (chick from TV) I know, but…I don't know why I can't have a baby on my own!

DE: (as TV continues…) Because you're not asexual!

All: (laugh hysterically)

DE: (goes into Hiei's trailer and paints everything pink, puke green, and a rusty white)

EBD: (goes into Touya's trailer and paints everything dark grey, hot pink, brown, and bright red)

DE and EBD: (meet together and dump evidence in the lake) Heheheh…

Hiei: (wakes up) OOO_OOO AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! PINK!!!!!!!!!! (spazzes)

Touya: (wakes up) OOO_OOO AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!! BRIGHT RED!!!!!!!!!!!!! (spazzes)

KK: (comes back from camp) Hiei! I'm back! (opens trailer door and sees everything colored) O_O

TC: (comes back from camp also) Touya, honey! I'm back from camp! (enters trailer door and sees everything painted) O_O

KK, TC, Hiei, and Touya: (run outside, spazzing) DE!!!!!!!! EBD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EBD and DE: (innocently) Yeah?

4 Spazzers: Someone painted our trailer!!!!!!!!! (looks at other couple) Yours too?! O_o;;

DE: (acts like nothing happened) Say what?

KK: Someone painted our trailers!

Touya: @_@ BRIGHT RED!!!!!!!!!!! (spazzes)

Hiei: @_@ PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!! (spazzes)

TC: HELP US!!!!!!!!

EBD: O_o; Do you have any leads?

KK: Do you think we'd be clueless if we did?

DE: How were we to know?

Hiei: Help us, baka ningen!

EBD: Okay, okay!

TC: Did you guys see anyone around our trailers?

EBD and DE: (look at each other with mischievous glint in eyes) Nooo…

KK: DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You guys are the observant ones!

DE: (choke-laughs) Yeah, right!

All: (search for culprits)

*~*About 2 days later…*~*

DE: (helping others repaint trailers) Any leads yet?

Touya: …No…whoever did it is good.

EBD: (suppresses a laugh)

Hiei: *glances at EBD) Or maybe the culprits are right under our noses…

TC: (whacks Hiei) Surely you aren't talking about EBD and DE!

Hiei: And what makes you think they're innocent?

TC: Well, they said they didn't see anyone around the trailers…

Touya: Because they were the ones that did it!

DE and EBD: >_>;;;

KK: (walks in) I FOUND EVIDENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!

All: WHERE?! HOW?!

KK: In the lake. Paintbrushes and cans.

Hiei: Let's run a fingerprint on everyone who was here that day.

*~*A couple hours later…*~*

TC: Not one matches!

Hiei: Try those two! (point at EBD and DE)

EBD and DE: us? (look innocent and slightly shocked)

Touya: The only two people who were here that didn't get fingerprinted…

DE: What about yourselves?

EBD: She does have a point…

Hiei: Are you accusing us of painting our own trailers the worst colors?!

DE: Um, well, yeah, I guess….

KK: You honestly think Hiei would paint his trailer pink, even though he's deathly afraid of the color?

EBD: It could happen…

TC: I don't think Touya would paint our trailer bright red, either.

Touya: Yeah, what're you two hiding?

DE and EBD: Nothing!

KK: (glares) Then get fingerprinted!

DE: (after a moment's hesitation) Alright, fine… (gets fingerprinted)

EBD: (sighs) Okay, fine… (gets fingerprinted as well)

*~*A few minutes later…*~*

TC: O_o; …theyr'e both matches…

All but DE and EBD: (glare at DE and EBD)

DE and EBD: (gulp, then run) ^_^;;;

All: (chase the two) GET BACK HERE!!!!!!!!!!!

[DE: Yay! I get Youko to be crazy and hyper with me! (evil grin) Sorryz…just read!]

Youko: (comes up behind DE) What ya doin'?

DE: Working on my horror fic.

Youko: O_o Since when did you like horror?

DE: Since I watched Petshop of Horrors. (smiles) That was the first horror video that I liked. Quite detailed and gruesome, it made my appetite grow… >_>;

Youko: A gruesome horror anime making you hungry? O_o;

DE: I know…scary!

Youko: Weird is more like it…

EBD: (comes tumbling down stairs) WEEEEEEE!!!!!

Jin: Watch out now, li'l lassie! Don' hurt yaself!

KK: (yells from upstairs) DE, what's in the purple glass container?

DE: YAMA TSUYU SALAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yusuke: What's Yama Tsuyu Salad?

DE: Yama Tsuyu ROUGHLY translates to Mountain Dew. I found a recipe for it! ^_^

All but DE: o_o;;;;;;;;;;;

EBD: She has too much time on her hands…

KK: When'd ya figure that out?

Yusuke: Just now.

All: O_o;;

Hiei: Let's get out of here before DE goes insane…

DE: (eats MDSalad and tackles everyone)

Youko: A little late for that…

TC and Touya: (walk in and get tackled) Oof!

Jin: Run for your lives! (grabs EBD and runs)

KK: Hey, wait for us! (grabs Hiei and runs)

TC: O_o;; Oh no… DE's on a hyper spree…

Touya: Then let's get out of here while we still can.

TC: But someone has to make her sane again!

Touya: >_>;; Was she ever sane?

TC: Well, no…okay! We have to calm her down!

Touya: (sighs and follows TC into the trailer)

TC and Touya: OOOOOO_OOOOOO;;;

DE and Youko: (jump off walls and ceiling and are really very hyper and crazy)

TC and Touya: (run away)

TC: (eats mango) Anyone want any?

All: ME!!

TC: (gives everyone a bit of the mango)

DE: (comes in)

TC: Hey DE! Want some mango?

DE: (chewing gum) Sure.

TC: (gives a piece of mango to DE)

DE: (takes gum out and eats mango…grimaces and turns purple while shuddering)

All: (try to suppress laughter)

KK: You all right, DE?

DE: (nods while conditions remain the same)

EBD: Does it taste that bad?

Hiei: I don't even mind it…

DE: (shakes head while still shuddering)

Botan: It's the gum…

DE: (nods vigorously)

KK: Huh?

Botan: The gum makes it taste bad…

DE: (finally swallows mango, but face remains red and chews gum again) yeah…this gum makes everything taste bad… >_>;;

All: (finally crack up laughing)

Yukina: Are you certain this will not hurt, Genkai?

Genkai: Don't worry, innocent girl. It won't hurt one bit.

Yukina: O_O

*~*Later that day…*~*

Yusuke: Hey, Yukina! Nice tattoo! Where'd ya get it?

Yukina: Thank you, Yusuke. I got it from-

Yusuke: YUKINA'S GOT A TATTOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All: (come running out and look at Yukina's tattoo) Oooo…

Kuwabara: (pokes it) I think you look better without it, but it's still pretty cool!

Yukina: ^_^ Thank you, Kazuma.

DE: ………there's something unreal about it………..

EBD: What do you mean?

DE: (licks finger, then rubs Yukina's tattoo) …Just as I thought… It's temporary.

Kuwabara: You mean it's going to be there forever?!

Yusuke: No, it means she's going to have it until she gets married, then it'll magically disappear!

All but Yusuke and Kuwabara: (facevault) -_-;;;

EBD: Temporary means it won't last long and it can come off!

Yusuke and Kuwabara: Oh…

Yukina: (chases Genkai with an oversized frying pan) YOU TOLD ME IT WAS PERMANENT!!!!!!!!!

Genkai: (runs) =^_^=

Everyone Else: >_>;;

TC: How did you know, DE?

DE: I'm mistress of temp. tattoos, thank you!!

All: (sweatdrop and facevault)

KK: Leave it to the freak to tell you what's real and what's temporary…

DE: HEY!!!! (chases KK with an oversized flyswatter)

KK: OOOOO_OOOOO (runs)

All: o_o;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Hiei: (turns knob to trailer but it doesn't turn) The hey? Why won't it turn? Did I lock it?

Keiko: (walks by Hiei's trailer) What's wrong, Hiei?

Hiei: (going around trailer) Searching for the hidden key to my trailer.

Keiko: Why? (helps Hiei)

Hiei: I locked myself out of my own trailer.

Keiko: O_o; That's not like you, Hiei…

Hiei: Shut up.

Botan and Shuichi: (walk by)

Botan: Keiko, Hiei, what are you doing?

Keiko Looking for Hiei's secret key to his trailer.

Shuichi: Why?

Keiko: Because he locked himself out.

Botan and Shuichi: O_o;

Shuichi: That's not like you, Hiei…

Hiei: Shut up, I know.

Keiko: That's exactly what I said.

Botan and Shuichi: (help Hiei and Keiko)

Yusuke: (does the same as the others)

Kuwabara: (walks up) What're you guys doing?

Yusuke: Helping Hiei find the key because he locked himself out of his own trailer.

Kuwabara: Uh, the huge window by the door is gone, ya know…You can just enter through there, then unlock the door.

All but Kuwabara: (freeze and stare at Kuwabara)

Hiei: (tries it and unlocks the door) …it worked…

All but Kuwabara: OOO_OOO;;

Kuwabara: O_o; What? What worked? (dumbfounded)

[DE: TC had this idea, so I wrote it! ^_^ have fun! OH! And don't forget: BASHING AND LOCKING UP SANE PEOPLE!!!!! By the way, FEAR FOR YOUR SANITY!!!!!!!!!!! …if you have any…]

Sane People: {consists of Genkai, Yukina, Keiko, Shizuru, Shuichi, Kuwabara, Koenma, Karasu, Toguro Brothers, Hiei, and Touya} (trapped in a giant metal cage shaped like a ball and stare down) O_O;

Insane People: {consists of EBD, DE, KK, TC, Jin, Youko, Kuronue, Chuu, Yusuke, Koto, and Juri} (go around, bashing things at a fair convention thingy mabobber)

EBD and Jin: (at the electronics' control booth)

EBD: (presses a button)

Metal Ball with Sane People: (starts going every which-way-you-know really fast)

Sane People: O_O: (go flying and get stuck to sides of ball)

Insane People: (don't notice)

TC: (at the cell phone booth, she calls random people and makes small talk with them, freaking them out)

DE: (finds the food section and eats all sugary things-but doesn't gain weight!)

KK: (finds computer booth) OOOOOOO!!! (starts messing around with laptops…finds one that flashes "Control Mind"…presses buttons and controls Kuwabara)

Kuwabara: (while ball keeps going, he punches Koenma)

Koenma: (deep, slow voice) HHHHHHEEEEEEEEEYYYYYY!!! Doooooonnnnnn'tt ppppppuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnccccchhhhhhhh mmmmeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!

Kuwabara: (same as Koenma) Iiiiiiitttttt'ssss nnnnoooott mmmeeeeee!!! Ssssommmoneee'ss coooonnnntrollllllinggggg mmmmmeeeeeee!!!!!!!

Sane People: O_o;;

Youko and Kuronue: (walk in front of video cameras and see themselves on the screen and stop and make fun of themselves)

Koto and Juri: (find the cooking department and grab pots and pans and start fighting with them)

KK: (stops and realizes Hiei is in the ball) OH MY GOD!!!!!! (runs over to EBD) STOP THE BALL!!!!!!!

EBD: Why? (continues pressing buttons)

TC: (realizes Touya's in the ball, too) TOUYA!!!!!!!!!!!

Jin: By golly, their lovers are in that ball!!!

EBD: Oh…um, but how do I stop it?

Others: (come over and sweatdrop)

Jin: (presses a button)

Giant Metal Ball: (goes even faster; so fast that it breaks from the ceiling and is sent flying everywhere)

Sane People: O_O; AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Insane People: o_o;; (laugh hysterically)

Giant Metal Ball: (destroys everything and finally stops in the lake)

Keiko, Yukina, and Kuwabara: OH MY GOD!!!!!!! I'M IN WHITE!!!!!!!!! O_O;

Other Sane People: OH MY GOD!!!!!! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!

Insane People: (watches as Giant Metal Ball descends into lake and lows up after completely covered by water…it looks like fireworks, and the Insane People clap)

Sane People: (miraculously are not hurt, but really dizzy and green. They lay on the ground)

DE: (pokes Touya and Hiei) I think they're fine. Might take them about 50 million years to recover, but they'll still be fine!

Other Insane People: -_-;;

DE: (stares) …I finally did it..I finally finished typing it! AFTER A MILLION YEARS, I FINALLY FINISHED IT!!!!!!!!!!

TC: Um, DE, it's only been about two months…if not three…

DE: >_>;; So, I was being sarcastic! (shifty eyes)

TC: -_-;;

KK: (strangling DE) HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO MY POOR HIEI!!!!!!!!!!

DE: (turning blue and purple)

TC: Um, KK, I think you're killing her…

EBD: And I told her she should be evil to them, considering you both were at camp…

KK: (still strangling DE, glares at EBD)

TC: (glares at EBD)

EBD: ^_^; Oops, did I say that? (nervous)

TC: (tackles EBD)

EBD: GAH!!!!!

*~*And so begins the huge fight of authoresses that we will not write what happens because it's too gruesome, too bloody, too emotional, too violent, too weird, too unusual, too entertaining, too bazaar, too exciting, too--*~*

4 Authoresses: (stop and glare)

Narrator: Okay, okay….it's really none of those, but they're just too lazy to write it out.

4 Authoresses: (stalk towards Narrator)

Narrator: O_O;; REVIEW SO I CAN DIE!!!!! O_o; Hey, I didn't want to say that!

DE: (at computer, typing) ^_^ you do now!

Narrator: (tackles DE, then gets tackled by the other three authoresses, and so begins another fight)

All: REVIEW!!!!!!!

TC: Please? OW! KK, THAT WAS MY CHEST!!!!!!

KK: Sorry! (continues fighting)

DE: O_o; let's get out of here….