Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Yu Yu Hakusho Hair Salon ❯ The First Customers ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: uh huh sure I own it. Haha in my dreams. And if I did own it lets just say kuwabara wouldn't be coming back to life and botan would have a fatal oar accident.

Summary: IT'S A FIC!!! ^_^ well since everyone loved my other humor fic, which isn't done yet I might add, I decided to make another humor fic cus I got a really good idea while talking to Liana. ^_^ basically what the title says, the yyh gang gets bored and so koenma hooks em up with their own hair salon, and since they're all weird they get no customers so they kill each other's hair. And, with nothing else to say in the summary, *pulls Juri impression * let the first chapter of Yu Yu Hakusho Hair Salon begin! ^_~

*Yusuke, Botan, and Kieko are in a hair salon*

Yusuke: Tell me again why we're here?

Botan: Because you said that you were bored.

Kieko: Not to mention the fact that ever since we got back from our honeymoon we've been flat broke. We need the money, now that the baby's on its way.

Yusuke: WHAT BABY?!?!?!?!

Kieko: Oops, wasn't supposed to say that. ^_^;;;;;;;;;;;

Yusuke: * faints * x_x

*Kuwabara enters salon*

Kuwabara: Hey Botan, hey Kieko, uh why is Urimeshi on the ground?

Botan: Oh you know him, always goofing around. He's practicing his "pretend to be dead" technique. He says he wins every time against Raizen with it. Right Kieko?

Kieko: Huh? Oh yeah, he's showing us his best technique. It has nothing to do with the fact that I'm pregnant… oops.

Kuwabara: YOU'RE WHAT?!?!?!?! *faints and falls next to Yusuke *

Botan: Jeez Kieko you really know how to make the guys fall for you.

Kieko: So it seems.

* Kurama and Hiei enter salon *

Kurama: Hello Botan, hello Kieko. How are you guys doing?

Botan: *gets dreamy look in her eyes as she sees her secret crush * Oh I'm just fine Kurama, how are you?

Kurama: *looks creeped out * Ummm I'm fine.

Hiei: *nudges Kurama and looks him square in the eye*

Kurama: I didn't forget. I'm just waiting for Kuwabara and Yusuke to wake up and everyone else to get here.

Kieko: Everyone else?

Kurama: Yes, didn't Botan tell you? Koenma heard about your money problems, and since everyone else needs some spare cash, he hooked us all up with jobs at this hair styling salon, which he apparently is the boss of.

Kieko: So when you say everyone, who exactly are you referring to?

Kurama: Oh just the usual suspects, the Rekai Tantei, you, Shizuru, Botan, Genkai, and Yukina.

Kuwabara: *suddenly wakes up * WHAT?!?!?! YUKINA-SAN IS HERE?!?!?!?! *starts prancing around like a ballerina* (a/n: ok for all of you who have seen the second yyh movie, poltergeist report, u know that seen when they're at genkai's temple and kuwabara finds out that yukina is there and runs to where she is? Yah well this seen is exactly like that only Kuwabara's prancing around with no particular destination ^_^ ddc out.)

Hiei: *suddenly looks very pissed off * LEAVE MY SISTER ALONE YOU FUCKING BASTARD!

*Yukina, Shizuru, and Genkai walk in the door right as Hiei yells that *

Yukina: Oh Hiei I never knew you had a family! I would love to meet your sister sometime! Maybe we could pick flowers in the meadows together, and be the best of friends.

Hiei: *becomes very interested in his shoes and suddenly starts blushing * uh I haven't seen my sister in a long time, but I'm sure she would like that very much.

Kurama and Yusuke: * snickering in the background *

Hiei: Will you two shut up?

Kurama: Now Hiei, that's no way to talk to your lover now is it?

Hiei: * blushes harder *

Everyone: 0_0

Botan: * sniffs * You mean, you love Hiei, Kurama?

Kurama: Yup.

*Door suddenly bursts open and in storm Karasu, Kuronue, and Yomi, aka "Kurama's fanclub" *

Yomi: Kurama, what do you mean you're going out with Hiei? I refuse to allow this.

Karasu: Yeah, why Hiei? He's too short, and he's attempting to copy my hairstyle.

Kuronue: Hellooo that's MY hairstyle.

Karasu: No, it's my hairstyle.

Kuronue: No it's MINE. I've been around hundreds of years longer than you.

Karasu: Ok then it's yours.

Yomi: Actually it's mine.

Kuronue: No it's mine. You copied it back when we were in Yoko's thieving gang.

Yomi: Ooohhh yeah now I remember. Yeah, it's Kuronue's hairstyle.

Kurama and Hiei: -_-;;;;;;

Hiei: First of all, I did NOT copy anyone's hairstyle, and secondly, my hair looks nothing like yours' except for the fact that it's black.

Karasu: Exactly. You copied our hairstyle by having black hair.

Hiei: You IDIOT we're in JAPAN. Everyone has black hair!

Karasu: Exactly. Everyone copied our hairstyle.

Kuronue: MY hairstyle. Not ours. MINE.

Karasu: Ok, everyone copied KURONUE'S hairstyle. Happy?

Kuronue: Yup ^_^

Botan: Why do you guy's always hang out together?

Yomi: Because

Karasu: We

Kuronue: Are

All three: The Kurama Fanclub! * all three flash piece signs as confetti flies into the air *

Hiei: Jeez Kurama I didn't know you had a fanclub

Kurama: Neither did I -_-;;

Botan: A Kurama Fanclub?!?!?! Can I join?!?!?!

Kurama: * anime fall *

Yomi: hmmmm a female member? We've never allowed a woman to join our club

Karasu: But she is a fan of Kurama. You've seen how she looks at him.

Kuronue: Then it's settled. Botan you can be a member.

Botan: Yay!!!! ^_^

*Koenma appears and hears this part and starts crying*

Koenma: Botan don't you love me?!?!

Botan: Oh hi Koenma. Umm what are you talking about?

Koenma: Oh I don't know maybe the fact that WE ARE GOING OUT!!!!

Botan: Oops sorry Koenma. I guess I just let it slip past me. ^_^;;;;

Kurama, Hiei, and Koenma: * anime fall *

Yusuke: * wakes up * wha? Wha happened? Oh it's toddler man.

Koenma: That's Koenma-sama to you Yusuke. Anyway, as you should all know I own a large chain of hair styling salons, and since you all need money for your own personal reasons * he eyed Botan when he said this, who wasn't paying attention as she was staring at Kurama along with the rest of the fanclub * I've decided to set you up with jobs at this salon. Your jobs are very simple really. Hiei, since you are the best with swords, you will be the master hair trimmer. Kieko, Shizuru, Yukina, and Botan, since you are women and know how to style hair, you will be our key stylists. Kurama, since your hair always looks and smells nice and is always clean, you will be our main shampooer. Yusuke can be the cashier, Kuwabara is the cleaner, and Genkai is the supervisor. And as for the rest of you * he eyed the Kurama fanclub's male members* you three can do whatever odd job the others need you to do. Well, I'm off.

Yusuke: Where are you in such a hurry to be?

Koenma: My daily massage of course. It's not easy to be a prince you know. See ya guys later! *disappears *

Yusuke: Great just great. We know absolutely nothing about cutting hair or running a salon. We don't even have jobs, besides kicking demon ass!

Genkai: Quit your complaining and get to the cash register, or you'll be doing three thousand push ups using only your right pinky finger! Now, the rest of you, try to look busy when customers come in ok? I'm going to go into my office and play my video games now. Good luck. * goes into office and starts playing Spyro the Dragon. *

* Two girls enter the shop, one with brown hair with blonde highlights and curls on the ends, wearing a black sweatshirt and loose jeans, the other with brown hair wearing a blood red T-shirt and black nylon pants. *

Girl with black sweatshirt: My friend Liana and I would like to get our hair done for the winter ball tonight, and we heard that this place was good.

Liana: Yeah, Alex and I have very hot dates and we need to look equally hot. So, are you guys up for the job?

Yusuke: Uhhhhh I guess so. Would you like to get your hair shampooed, trimmed, and then styled? Or shampooed then styled? Or trimmed then styled? Or just styled?

Alex: Hmmmmm better go with shampooed, trimmed, then styled. That way we have no split ends, we smell good, and we look good. You agree Liana?

Liana: Yup. Sounds good to me.

Yusuke: Ok then ladies. Follow me and I'll take you to our best shampooest, Kurama.

*Girls follow Yusuke to Kurama, who's in the back of the room *

Yusuke: Oi, Kurama. We got customers. Wash their hair and make em `smell' nice, they have `hot' dates.

Kurama: Will do Yusuke. Ok ladies, what type of scented shampoo would you like? My personal favorite is rose, but we also have violet, marigold, apple, strawberry, cherry, cookie dough, and bubble gum. So, which will it be for you, miss?

Alex: Rose, it's my favorite flower.

Liana: I'll have what Alex's is having.

Alex: Copycat

Liana: I know ^_^

Kurama: A wonderful choice ladies. Rose is my favorite flower too. Now please sit in these chairs while I shampoo your hair.

*ten minutes later girls have shampooed hair. *

Kurama: Now, if you two will come with me, I will take you to our oh-so-cute hair trimmer, Hiei, who will trim your hair any length you want perfectly even in the shortest length of time. * leads girls to Hiei, who is standing against the wall scowling at nothing in particular*

Kurama: Hiei, these girls would like their hair trimmed. Please trim their hair evenly at whatever length they want. Ok?

Hiei: Whatever, fox.

Kurama: Good, now ladies, I'll leave you in Hiei's hands.

Hiei: * turns to girls * ok how much do you want cut off?

Liana: Ten inches!

Alex: If you take off ten inches then you'll look like a male cross dresser.

Liana: I was just kidding jeez. Um three inches will be fine.

Alex: Two for me, I'm trying to grow out my hair.

Hiei: Ok whatever.

*ten minutes later girls have their hair trimmed *

Hiei: Um, I guess I take you over to the stylists now. Follow me. * leads girls to Botan, Kieko, Yukina, and Shizuru *

Hiei: Style their hair.

Botan: Sure Hiei, oh and tell Kurama I said hi.

Hiei: I'll make sure I wont. * walks away. He then gets jumped by Kurama as he leans against the wall,

Liana and Alex: ^_^;;;;;;;;

Kurama Fanclub: T_T

Kieko: Ok how would you two like to have your hair styled?

Liana: I want mine straightened!

Alex: And I want mine to be curled.

Botan: Will do! Right-e-o girls lets get to work shall we?

Shizuru: Whatever

Yukina: Yes I agree

Kieko: Lets get started

Alex and Liana: Good idea

* thirty minutes later the girls have their hair styled, Liana's perfectly straight, Alex's perfectly curled. *

Botan: Good work girls! High fives all around!

Alex: Thanks you guys you guys rock. Now we'll look super hot for our hot dates tonight.

Liana: Yeah, what Alex said.

Kieko: It was nothing. It's what we do!

* Karasu peeks around door in back to see the back of Liana's head, and thinking it's Kurama because of the scent of her hair, sprints full speed and starts hugging her *

Liana: AHHH WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU PERVERT!!!! GET OFF ME!!!!

Karasu: Why Kurama, what a girlish voice you have.

Kurama: *taps Karasu on the shoulder * That's not Kurama. That's one of the customers.

Karasu: *turns around * Kurama! Why, you've figured out how to clone yourself! This is wonderful! Now we can all molest you!

Alex: GET THE FUCK OFF MY FRIEND!!! * hits Karasu over the head with purse *

Karasu: @_@

Alex: Serves you right, gay fag. Tormenting Kurama and then attacking my friend. Here's your money. We think you're all great people, except for that perv that's on the ground. *Storms out the door with Liana *

Kieko: Look what you did Karasu. You made us loose our customer. What do you have to say for yourself?

Karasu: She hits really hard @_@

*a tan, brown haired boy popped his head in through the door*

Boy: Your telling me! Alex kills me everyday. She's so mean.

Alex: *charges up from behind * MAX WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?

Boy now known as max: Nothing ^_^;;;;;;

Alex: Cmon we're gonna be late.

Max: Coming! *he turned back to the yu yu gang * you guys got off lucky. Cya round.

Yusuke: Ok that was weird.

Kurama: At least we got paid.

Kieko: Lets close shop now that way we don't have any more strange kids coming in.

Botan: Good idea.

Darkdemonchild: weeeeee that was fun. Oh and by the way, if u didn't already figure it out, I added myself and my friend Liana into the fic, but only for this part, I promise. I do that a lot in my fics, but I usually don't give us major roles. O and max is one of my guy friends. ^_^ anyways, the next chapter: the gang gets bored, and try different hair stuff on em. Let the mahem begin! ^_~ and as always, please review ^_^