|
| "Abstinence Education" Reviews/Comments [ 24 ] | | Pages (2): [ 1 2 › » ] | Title: After reading it all...
Reviewed By: Betraruga [MediaMiner Member] On: May 03, 2021 20:38 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10
Overall Rating: 5 of 10 Comment/Review:
I feel set up as a reader. The first half was 10/10, second half a
flat 0. You went from writing the hottest multi-chapter lemon ever,
with great characterization to boot, surprisingly well written, to
a s***** meandering mess filled with original characters no one
cares about, conversations that get dragged on for way too long
with strangers, nothing coming out of Rin's revenge or dilemma with
Anotsu, or most importantly any damn closure with Manji. And
garbage characterization, too. Rin just fucks off her vendetta like
that? And doesn't even get a level headed confrontation on it? As
if! Just a complete and disappointing lack of purpose. And no
warning in your disclaimers the complete heel turn this fanfic
takes, either. I'm so mad I wasted my time trying to slog through
the rest of this to not even find any resolutions. It's BS to
completely set up your readers and then not give them any payoff
whatsoever and dragging this out for so long. I didn't pay to read
this but boy I wish I could have gotten my time and investment
back. SO unsatisfying. I hate that I ever read this now. I actually
created an account on here just to vent. Fucks sake, write what you
want, but maybe warn readers next time. SMH.
| Reviewed By: reina q [MediaMiner Member] On: July 08, 2011 16:28 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow. It's been a while since I've found a fanfiction writer I like besides a few that I've stuck to for years. This is really well written! It's been about two years since you've been on, but I hope you read this review if you come back! Have you ever thought of doing something with InuYasha in it? This fanfiction has me ready to go back and start reading Blade of the Immortal! | Reviewed By: greengal48 [MediaMiner Member] On: March 17, 2010 13:32 PDT
Comment/Review:
... i can tell it's been a while sense you're muse has visited you. same here. perhaps our muses are out together? lol. this is great! i'm enjoying it greatly. i love your style of writing and the plot is wonderful. i'm dying to know what's going to happen. will they get back together or perhaps will she be resined to staying with Anatsu... whatever you do, please continue. thank you.
| Title: Hey...
Reviewed By: gokusgirl (too lazy to sign in) On: July 09, 2009 22:11 PDT
Comment/Review:
The story is going along very nicely. However I am really missing Manji in this fic. He's the spice in the story, you know? I hope he shows up soon...
| Reviewed By: Sassa, too lazy to log in On: October 20, 2008 03:16 PDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I don't mind the long research-holdups if this is what you deliver! Yet another interesting character has entered the scene... And, unfortunately, it seems as if the best choise for Rin is to marry "the one she'll hate immediately" (referring to the dream in chaper thirty-something). But then again, that is too a honourful way of settling the matter. But I wonder what Manji's up to... There are too many unfinished business concerning him. I'll totally be reading you! And I wish someone could make a doujinshi out of this script... It would be the most bought issue! I'll be reading you!
| Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: August 17, 2008 14:39 PDT
Comment/Review:
I don't know what surprises me more in this fic. I'm not one who relishes in reading 'Mary sue' stories, but your OC work. It's like you and the creator of this wonderful tale collaborated together, and the characters are so credible in this story. Second, the background info of this period. I sit back and read your material in a total awe... my mind seeing everything you write. It's truly amazing. You have such a great gift in storytelling, and I do thank you for giving us this gem, this diamond among the rough! Okay, now to the chapter. I applaud Rin for getting the hell out of there where she could, those folks were nuts. Did they honestly think she was going to agree to marriage that easily? They discussed marriage like purchasing land. I was a bit sad that Manji wasn't in this update; I only hope that you will re-unite them in the next half of this chapter. As always, well done.
| Reviewed By: Sassa [MediaMiner Member] On: August 07, 2008 04:03 PDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Oh Goddess oh goddess oh goddess, this is the most AMAZING, best written fan fiction I've EVER RED! And trust me, I've red A LOT! You really ought to win some kind of prize for this - I have to look up some sort of contest, because no matter the angle of it, you would've won, hands down. You've really captured the agony of people caught between bushido and what one's instincts tells one to do. Manji has always struck me as one of the most complicated characters ever made and Rin as his counterpart only highlights this. And you've taken their relation and communication to not only the next level, but to the next step of insight concerning ... more or less LIFE. Their roles, their place in society... the hardships gone though, sometimes for good reasons, sometimes for... for nothing it seems. And yet the struggle goes on, because what else can they do? Your story completely captivated me and I assure you I'll read it over and over and stay tuned for updates. Especially because of the fighting scenes... beautiful and messy, just like in the manga, interrupted sometimes, forced sometimes. As soon as I find the best words for it, I will praise you to heaven and back. One hundred million plusses, stars or whatever rating symbol suits you best!
| Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: June 20, 2008 11:18 PDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
What an intense and sad chapter! I was really hoping Rin would awake... and now Manji gone...what will happen next? I don't think it was wise for him to leave; he's really going to regret it. Thanks for giving us this long awaited chapter; it made my weekend!
| Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: June 19, 2008 15:19 PDT
Comment/Review:
I haven't even read this yet, but I had to thank you for updating! Okay, I'm off to read it now...
| Title: Chapters 36-42
Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: April 12, 2008 11:41 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
OMG I'm finally caught up! These last few chapters were your absolute best! You gave the true foundation of BOtI, which is all the blood and gore that we loved so much. It's good to stray away from the romance for a bit and focus on the violence that draws us to this manga, besides Manji. :D There was so much action, gore, and galore... if I was a nail bitter I'd be down to the nubs. A sad end to O-Hama and her lover; but I'm soooo glad they're gone!!! They're coming up out of the blue and giving good grief... and then Ansotsu appeared, my heart leapt in my throat. I'm glad of two things that's for sure: That 1) Manjin found his tongue (Rin was certain to find that it...heh heh) and 2) Manji didn't leave her with Ansotsu. What do you have planned for our pair now?? They have been through hell and back so far... but now since I'm all caught up I'll patiently sit back and wait for your next update. Until then, laters!
| Title: Chapters 31-35
Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: April 12, 2008 09:51 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Incredible. Their little squabble ends them both fighting for their lives... and who would have guessed it being that twerp Ronosuke and O-Hama had planned this? Very intense reading; these chapters are more descriptive, my imagination is whirling with the visualizations as I read. I had to stop reading chapter 35 TWICE before continuing... Please don't let Manji die. :(
| Title: Chapters 27-30
Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: April 12, 2008 07:13 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
In reflection of these chapters, I have to say that Manji in chapter 26 and into 27 was pitiful! He was speculating about Rin's time with Ansotu Kagehisa, calling her names, and even trying to end it. I felt so sad for him!!! But after reading the following chapter... wow. That was one hot chapter! I bet it was huge challenge on your part to write it... but it flowed so well and erotically. But them engaging into this act still didn't resolve the issues they have between them. I found the scene on the ferry quite funny with the two elderly people. And OMG finally at LAST Rin tell Manji of Makie's visit. A tad too late, I might add after what they did the night before @_@. Wow did he explode and take it over the edge! "You're my woman..." and dragging her out into the woods to prove it, that was a little surprising. I know he has said it before in the past in this story, but I think he's saying it with more conviction now. Manji's left with accusations; he doesn't have a whole lot to go on now. What puzzles me is how Rin BELIVES that marrying Ansotsu would atone for what he's done. It's so sickening! This is where Rin proves to be the most niave. Manji has every right to be hurt about this news to some degree. Okayyyy...::blows:: I'm off to read some more. Thanks for your email; I noticed now that this story is over at aff.net; and you many reviews! It is a much love story; I think the readers over here [MM.org] are a little review-stingy; it happens to me all the time when I post something here. But cheers to you! Laters!
| Title: Chapters 21-26
Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: April 11, 2008 16:39 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Whew! I could only manage to read five chapters today, including your revised chapter 8. But nonetheless, they were good. I'm a little confused at Makie telling Rin about Anotsu Kegahisa's proposal... It would be sickening if she accepted it. She may be the last descendant in her line; but that would be a great dishonor to her mother and father's deaths if she went along with it. If Anotsu wants to atone for what he's done, then he needs to cut his belly, like Rin told Makie. Man, I am truly bothered about this element you've put in here; and Manji is poor drunken mess... as always but even worse. I like his Haiku that he made, very cute. But I was yet on my edge of my seat when Makie discovered them kissing... OMG. Okay, I'll reflect more on these chapters tonight and read some more in the morning. This story is astounding!
| Title: Chapter 8
Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: April 11, 2008 05:25 PDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hey you fixed it! Good chapter... was well worth sending this extra review out to you. A bit of a introduction of the good things to come between the pair, I'll say. It's so comical how Manji just puts things, he doesn't have a shred of tact when it come to explaining sex to Rin. You mentioned that you have a LJ page... I didn't see it in your profile, can you forward it to me? Thanks!
| Title: Chapters 16-20
Reviewed By: gokusgirl [MediaMiner Member] On: April 10, 2008 18:05 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow-we what a read! Do you know I've been reading this all day, neglecting my family and job to do so?? Okay, to the chapters at hand... gee I loved them all! The highlights though are the shockingly frank way Manji explained why men do each other, which was so funny! He was elusive to her question whether he had done it before; but I think the way he explained it shed a light on the situation, so good for you and your research! :D They are making such an awesome connection, but still they keep themselves at arm's reach, you know? Well at least that's what I think. I didn't like when Rin went about saying he was terrible, and told him how he bruised her and all... he really got offended by that. She was so clueless. And now they're on the road, away from their oasis of the hut... and oh! The scene when Manji got jealous over the river guys wanting to take Rin across... now what was she thinking? I thought she had grown up enough to know these guys were trying to dupe her. I liked how Manji reacted to that, I hope she will listen to him more when they're on the road; like he said there are many dangers. What an exciting end to the last chapter, I applauded when Rin tried to save Maniji... it really kept me on the edge of my seat. Well that's all the reading I can do today; but rest assured I'm of tomorrow so I plan on getting a lot of reading done! Unit next time... BTW I see you're updating/revising your story...I'm glad you haven't abandoned this. This is truly a masterpiece. Laters!
| | Pages (2): [ 1 2 › » ] |
|
|
