| "The changing of time" Reviews/Comments [ 19 ] |
| Pages (2): [ « ‹ 1 2 ] |
Title: Chapter 7
Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: October 06, 2007 09:13 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wonderful chapter. The fight scene was very well done. You did a very good job with it. I like how you used many of Inuyashas sword techniques. I loved the scene with Inuyasha and Sango with him with his hand on her belly. It was endearing that he cared so much. I liked how in the beginning you repeated the last paragraph from the previous chapter. That helped me alot, as I read many many many stories and I find myself rereading the previous last paragraphs fromt he previous chapter to recall the story in my mind. I feel Inuyasha is still in character, he is just maturing and able to communicate better. I like how he is so concerned about Kagome. I have to agree that the lemon scene was a little rushed, but it was terrific no less. Your spelling was fine, I didn't notice any errors. Keep up the terrific work. You are doing a superb job so far!!!!
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Reviewed By: LadyCash [MediaMiner Member] On: October 06, 2007 02:02 CDT
Comment/Review:
Good job. The fight was fine, like that you reference the later manga. It is canon, after all, can't go wrong with that. IY's characterization was very well done, brave and brash, but still vulnerable. Like that he's got more confidence, both with himself and with K. Like that K is not whiny/crying. You did fine.
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Reviewed By: Knittingknots [MediaMiner Member] On: October 06, 2007 01:44 CDT
Comment/Review:
I liked this chapter. So don't take anything here as an attempt to diss you, because I absolutely am not, and you asked for some stuff. Liked how you used InuYasha's attacks in the fight scene. Felt it was an exciting battle scene. You may have rushed your lemon scene with Kagome and InuYasha a bit...it has nothing to do with the detail, some of it came across as mechanical (although towards the end, where he's trying to clearly make his point to her, it was a good bit stronger) - not talking about how you envisioned it, but more how the emotions in their heads, the presentation of their motivations and reactions - this can even be done with very little actual description of what they're doing...that's why as it went on and InuYasha got more clear about his feelings of potential loss, it seemed better...it seemed less going through the steps and more real. Your spelling seemed fine; I certainly didn't proof it for spelling errors (I used to be an English instructor and try not to be one any more!) but nothing jumped out at me in an irritating way. Your impression of InuYasha's voice seems good and strong to me throughout the chapter. I look forward to reading more!
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Title: Chapter 6
Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: September 26, 2007 19:53 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really liked this chapter. You did very good with the action. The story is comming along nicely. I love where it is going. Keep up the wonderful work. Oh... and thank you so very much for the quick update!!! Of course... more please! YOU ROCK!!! ---- Amy
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Title: Terrific
Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: September 20, 2007 19:20 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Chapter 5 was great. I like where the story is going. Keep up the wonderful work. And as always.... please update soon. THANKS! --- Amy
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Reviewed By: Ethereal Siren [MediaMiner Member] On: September 20, 2007 13:55 CDT
Comment/Review:
Yay! I love it! **add to favorites**
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Reviewed By: InuYashacrazy101 [MediaMiner Member] On: September 14, 2007 17:03 CDT
Comment/Review:
pretty good fanfic! i luv the way inuyasha shows her tender and loving care. please update asap -inuyashacrazy101
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Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: September 14, 2007 01:31 CDT
Comment/Review:
Wonderful chapter. Thanks for the update. I love your story. It gets better and better. Can't wait for the next chapter!
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Reviewed By: Knittingknots [MediaMiner Member] On: September 14, 2007 01:27 CDT
Comment/Review:
I do like how this story's going
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Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: August 31, 2007 22:19 CDT
Comment/Review:
OH... And great lemon! Wonderful for your first time! BRAVO (stands up and claps)
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Title: WOW
Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: August 31, 2007 22:18 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
That was quite a terrific chapter. Thanks for the update (It was worth the wait). The mating marks were different from other fic's Kudos for making it original. I felt Inuyasha pretty much stayed in character. Keep up the wonderful work. I can't wait for your next chapter! I love your story! It is superb!!!!! And of course: please update soon.
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Title: Terrific
Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: August 16, 2007 02:02 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Great Chapter. Don't be discouraged that not many people review. Just write and we will read. I will always review. Wonderful work so far. Keep it up. Update soon please. WONDERFUL. --- Amy
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Reviewed By: LadyCash [MediaMiner Member] On: August 16, 2007 00:34 CDT
Comment/Review:
Great start. Can't wait for more.
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Reviewed By: Knittingknots [MediaMiner Member] On: August 03, 2007 10:57 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is a good start for a divergence story. I'm looking forward to further episodes. Kikyo's death was handled nicely.
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Title: Excellent
Reviewed By: ScifiAmy [MediaMiner Member] On: August 03, 2007 10:31 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 1 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Excellent work. Not bad for your first time. I loved the first chapter. Keep up the terrific work.
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| Pages (2): [ « ‹ 1 2 ] |
