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| "Sic Semper Morituri" Reviews/Comments [ 5 ] | Reviewed By: the Lone Haranguer On: June 09, 2017 22:52 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 7 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
This seems to be abandoned. It has its strengths and its
weaknesses. The main viewpoint character has too much in common
with the infamous DJ Croft of Eyrie Productions' infamous Neon
Exodus Evangelion. He has the smell of the self-insert Gary Stu
about him--he's far too smug, far too knowledgeable, far too wise,
far too witty, far too in control of himself, and no
fourteen-year-old boy yet born could ever be half this tough. By
the time events smack some perspective and humility into him the
reader has long lost interest. I will say the worldbuilding is
fascinating, and the way the author has combined some very
disparate worlds--at last count, he has mashed up Neon Genesis
Evangelion with Ranma 1/2, H.P. Lovecraft, Sailor Moon, and I don't
even know what else. But--and this is the author's style, visible
in his other works as well--it's VERY difficult to follow what's
going on. It is perhaps an exaggeration to say that you need to
follow comments and discussion (on a more active forum than this
one--not naming any names, though) to discover that, oh, yeah,
between this paragraph and this one, the protagonist performed
these feats of ingenious lateral thinking verging on Insane Troll
Logic and fixed this list of problems, and this should all be
obvious because in the next chapter a different character raised
his eyebrow while drinking coffee. Because he never drinks coffee
in canon, so it's a sign of... uh, yeah. Card tricks in the dark,
anyone? Oh, she was pregnant? And we were supposed to know this
because she visited a doctor's office three chapters later? And
this character didn't appear, when you might possibly have expected
her to, and it was because there was an offscreen assassination
attempt that the author neither tells the reader about, nor is any
viewpoint character aware of it until ten chapters later? The
author has a grasp of "show, don't tell," insofar as he doesn't
make the mistake some authors do of making the audience sit through
a long infodump to set up every scene--but he ends up neither
showing nor telling us enough for us to put the pieces together and
figure out what's going on, and leaves us scratching our heads. The
Law of Conservation of Detail is a fine thing, but too much of that
leaves the audience in the dark. Mechanically this author's grasp
of the English language is well above average and he can write good
dialogue, though usually it's his Stu-ish self-insert characters
who get most of the best lines. I want to like his work.
Protagonists a bit less ultra-competent would go a long way towards
that, as well as letting the reader in on the joke now and then.
| Title: Blackholelord
Reviewed By: Blackholelord On: June 13, 2013 18:42 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10 Comment/Review:
While original it was also very confusing and somewhat to follow. | Title: FanficManiac
Reviewed By: Donald7777 On: February 14, 2013 23:09 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow this has to be the single largest fanfic I have ever read, besides the Ranma Modern Dynasty and all the other peices to it. The story was initally very hard to get into, However after reading a few of lovecrafts books the story was beutifle. Hopefully you can find time to finish it becuase after spending a month reading this one and starting on the piolets I need more. | Reviewed By: Sterling-Ag On: March 08, 2011 23:22 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
I am glad I found you again, after your website went down I was worried about you being able to continue. I really hope you find time to continue this story. It is really enjoyable. My only real complaint is that sometimes it feels slow-moving. Like you are trying to cover to much about your characters and ignore plot progression. But all in all it is still a great read. Thanks for sharing. | Reviewed By: XStylus [MediaMiner Member] On: August 14, 2010 19:59 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
The most magnificent, epic, and friggin' HUGE story my eyes have ever read, bar none. I just spent the past two MONTHS reading it from start to finish. The quality of this work well exceeds that of even published dead-tree writers, and the fact that you've stuck to this for so long and so prolifically speaks of your dedication. It's also clear you're quite well read and well educated on the period, circumstances, and settings integrated so well in this story. I beg you, please continue. You've come very far already and I so dearly hope we have the honor of seeing this continue even further. Thank you most kindly for this epic piece of work.
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