| "Be Careful What You Say" Reviews/Comments [ 40 ] |
| Pages (3): [ 1 2 3 › » ] |
Title: hmmm
Reviewed By: Vampire liaison [MediaMiner Member] On: August 22, 2007 18:26 CDT
Comment/Review:
Glad to see that the tense fumbling was short lived. one chapter in fact. i dont know what came over you there, but i hope it goes and stays away. the story, however, i shaping up to be a really interesting and introspective little peice tha im looking forward to finishing. so much so in fact, that i'll get to it now.
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Title: past or the present?
Reviewed By: Vampire liaison [MediaMiner Member] On: August 22, 2007 17:52 CDT
Comment/Review:
Mr. Fyrloche, how could you. i am shamed to see an author of your caliber tense jumping. since i seem to be the only person who uses that term, i will explain. your work, in this chapter at least, jumps between the past and present tense. "Inuyasha growls in frustration." ok fine. "Inuyasha growled in frustration." also great. together. no, no, no. Why did you do that? Why? I've never seen you do that before, mixing the tenses together like that. its wrong.i mean, it is the mistake i hate the most of all possible literary mistakes, and to see someone like you, whom i regard most highly as an author is like seeing rozefire (you can find her on ff.net or here to check her out) tense jump, most dissappointing. i dont get it. i've read your other work and never seen this before. if it was once or twice, i could write it offf as a mistake. i do it, you do it,we all do it. but it isnt. its several times in the first chap alone. i'm dumbstruck.
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Reviewed By: Autumn_the_Reviewer [MediaMiner Member] On: June 22, 2007 03:42 CDT
Comment/Review:
*Squeaks* a sequel? did you write one? oooohhhh i loved this story. It was original, and very well written. I liked how you portrayed inuyasha's open declaration of love. A carving. How very unique. Keep writing and I'll keep reading.
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Reviewed By: wildthundakat [MediaMiner Member] On: May 23, 2007 17:59 CDT
Comment/Review:
wow. i really enjoyed reading ur fic. i read it in two or three days a work. it was a bit different than most fics i tend to read, but i loved it.
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Reviewed By: scherezade [MediaMiner Member] On: February 05, 2005 12:11 CST
Comment/Review:
What an opening chapter! I can't tell you how much I personally hate the "sit" command b/c I feel that Kagome abuses it. I've read one or two other fics that explore the negative outcome of Kags sitting Inu at an inopportune time, but none have a plot quite like yours! Kudos for your originality. I thought that it was a nice touch that you had Miroku ask Kagome to pray for Inuyasha. While he's a pervert, he's still a monk - and that seems completely within character for him to say at a time of crisis. Of course, I was initially flipping out that you would have Kagome married off to some random ninja.. I'm too much of a diehard Inu-Kag fan to stomach that! But all's well that ends well. Inu and Kag have each other. And I like how you gave poor, neglected Kaede a romantic past...as well as some prospects for the future. She has got to be one of the most understated characters - we fanfic authors aren't too creative when it comes to her usually. Still, what you wrote for her was entirely believable. Nice, entertaining piece of work! Of course, your epilogue is a big tease....
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Title: sequel
Reviewed By: Fear_of_Real_Life [MediaMiner Member] On: May 26, 2004 22:31 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
YOU MUST WRITE A SEQUEL!!!!! your ending is to much like a chapter for this to be a perfect story you cant leave a cliffhanger each story must stand alone but is ok to ASSUME that people read the stuff before it but it cant be REQUIRED cuz not everyone can spend all there time making sure that they have read all of them
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Reviewed By: resq188 [MediaMiner Member] On: December 30, 2003 00:58 CST
Comment/Review:
what are you going to call the sequel to this story. need to know so I can look it up.
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Reviewed By: mattmatt On: December 20, 2003 00:06 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 7 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
its a great story till the end when you ruin it with the fact that he lets her marry inuyasha its way to outta character
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Reviewed By: krystallina On: December 04, 2003 09:31 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
i really liked this story. plz tell me there will be a seqel?? plz. well i hope u write more fanficts. they will all probally be as good as this one or better
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Reviewed By: michelle(red) :) On: November 24, 2003 17:04 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
ok.... great story, nice twists! i did find it predictable that they would marry though! sorry!!! the rest was totally surprising and quite good!!!! i still think you should write and publish your own stuff!!!
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Title: BusinessMija@aol.com
Reviewed By: Mija aka Maryann [MediaMiner Member] On: November 02, 2003 02:05 CST
Comment/Review:
ooh I soo liked the ending it was sooooo good..cant wait to see if you make a sequel..:-) and I am going to keep an eye out for the story you previewed at the end of this chap it looks really really good cant wait..till later huggles and smiles a fan Mija..:-)
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Reviewed By: InusDemoness [MediaMiner Member] On: November 01, 2003 13:59 CST
Comment/Review:
Are you related to Naraku!!!!! That was too evil! You have to write moooooooooooooooooooooooore!!!!
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Title: BusinessMija@aol.com
Reviewed By: Mija aka Maryann [MediaMiner Member] On: October 20, 2003 14:36 CDT
Comment/Review:
HaH..finally found it..whew Im glad I sooooo love this story and cant wait to see how it plays out..awww poor kagome what is she and Inu going to do?? again thank you for emailing me about the update ty ty ty..your the best..and sorry to hear of your loss..my condolences..as always another great chap to a great fic..huggles and smiles Mija..:-)
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Reviewed By: meera [MediaMiner Member] On: October 19, 2003 19:46 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
write more!
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Reviewed By: Tail Wagger [MediaMiner Member] On: October 19, 2003 19:16 CDT
Comment/Review:
Isn't anyone going to mention the parrellel between Keade and the elder, and Kagome and InuYasha? well, update soon.
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