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| "Foundations of Neo Genesis" Reviews/Comments [ 97 ] | | Pages (7): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 › » ] | Title: Awesome
Reviewed By: Kagz On: June 18, 2007 00:26 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I like this story sooo much. I've been kind of on my nerves lately, and your update came at such a great time. ^_^ I read it and I feel a lot better. The characters are so real!! It just takes me away from all the stress. I can't wait until you update again; I know it might not be a while..... But I can't help hoping it comes as fast as possible!! This is one of the 3 or so fanfics I still keep up with ^_^ I know you won't let me down. ~Eagerly Awaiting the Next Chapter!!~
| Reviewed By: InuAngelInuDevil [MediaMiner Member] On: May 21, 2007 18:03 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Could you please please please update this story, a new chapters and more chapters please...I have been waiting for 8 months for this to update, so please add a new good and really long chapter and continue working on this, but im not really trying to pressure you, i just really, really love this story...so please for my sake and anyone else who this is their favorite story ever...continue this daily, weekly, but never as far as monthly, that is just way too long...^-^...i sincerely apoligize if this is pressuring you, but i am eternally grateful for this fanfiction story, i read it over and over...its my first best story ever...so thank you so much if you keep writing this, please respond to it if you can...Thank You...^-^
| Reviewed By: Maloy [MediaMiner Member] On: February 26, 2007 13:03 EST
Comment/Review:
I really like this story. I hope you will update soon. I like the descriptions, and you manage really good with all those characters. Everyone has a character and a personality. No Mary Sues and that's very good. I like the idea a lot. Please don't forsake this story.
| Reviewed By: InuAngelInuDevil [MediaMiner Member] On: February 25, 2007 13:14 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Please infinity times, continue to write this please, as your fanfiction fan and reader in fanfiction and mediaminer, I love this story as I read it over and over, this story is one of my favorite and main priority of reading, so please keep writing, I have been waiting for a very very very long time ever since chapter 14 was out...^-^
| Reviewed By: Caitriona [MediaMiner Member] On: October 10, 2006 22:17 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Before I start, please don't take any of this as a personal attack. Also please remember that this is just my opinion. That and $4.01 will get you a breakfast at Burger King. Ultimately YOU are the author and what YOU write goes. As an Inuyasha fanfic, I don't care much for this piece. As a futuristic original piece, I very much like it. Call the demons something else, still have the main male character be a half breed, change the names around, and you will have a great great piece - worthy of publication. You have started with a great concept (Similar to Exiles of Colsec) where Earth is way to full and some end up going to another planet to colonize. You have added in a facinating basic religion and fleshed out the story with some interesting characters. While survival is a good basis for a story (man vs nature) you may want to add in a sweeping plot that the survival melds into. For example, the green food pellets were part of a plot to make sure the first wave were weakened and helpless. Some of the main characters know more about the planet than orinigally thought and the second wave was never sent. Onto the characters as you have written them. Miroku has probably retained the most of his original personality from the manga. He seems to be a priest that was willing to bend the rules somewhat, and so is the one that you have created here. Inuyasha has retained a lot of his basic personality. He is hiding a lot and it will take a lot of work to bring it out. Inu in the manga can sometimes act like a brat, but he will always do what is right in the end. Your Inu shows these same qualities - his fights with Kagome and the rest of the party, his distancing of himself from everyone physically as well as emotionally, but when the food gets low he shares the armorfish with everyone rather than hording it for himself. I would like to get a glimpse of some more of his background - perhaps in the same dream montage that you gave us at the beginning with Kikyou's death. Another great way you did this was when he talked about capturing and eating the rats. His knowledge of the basics of hunting but inability to translate it into bigger game was wonderfully written. Kagome seems rather true to the manga. Her protective nature is present, but it isn't overwhelming. Her book knowledge is high, but her practical knowledge is low. I think that you have a good potential for a strong, well rounded character with her. The two characters that I have been the most disappointed with are Sango and Kouga. There was only a short amount of time in the manga where Sango couldn't get past her training to move on - and your Sango seems trapped there. Manga!Sango realized pretty early on that many of the things she had been taught weren't true, especially those about youkai and hanyou. Neo!Sango is so wrapped within her need to control that she can't effectively lead. She is constantly at odds with her purpose (as I see it). You may well have her make an AHHA! moment with the demons in the group and thus grow.....or you may not. Similarly, your Kouga seems to be trapped in his own badboyness. Pre-Kagome!Kouga thought nothing of slaughtering and stealing. Your Kouga seems to be stuck there. (or perhaps he just hasn't had enough chapters to get out of his downward spiral) I know that a lot of this has probably sounded flamey, but that hasn't been my intention at all. I actually have really enjoyed this story and hope that you will write more of it. You have a descriptive style that doesn't bog down. You describe enough of the bast that I can get the basics - you don't tell me the texture of it's undercoat. Thanks for writing for us and sharing it for us. Caitriona at juno dot com
| Reviewed By: silverwolf halfbeast [MediaMiner Member] On: September 25, 2006 07:09 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Comment/Review:
I like this story, very surviel like. And how they try to survive is interesting. I just hope thsy don't go insane before the other group gets there, if they ever get there. So update soon and keep doing what you do best, write.
| Reviewed By: InuyashasBiggestFan [MediaMiner Member] On: September 15, 2006 21:40 EDT
Comment/Review:
I think your story is amazing. The whole futuristic setting is totally captivating , I love how well you describe the animals and everything else. It sets a very distinct image in people minds. I know you are losing your interest in fanfics but I hope you hold out until the end with this one. It is very good and I love it so much.I do hope you eventually make this into a book and become a famous author. With a talent like yours you deserve it. ^_^ . I hope you update soon. The story is fantastic, keep at it!
| Reviewed By: GrayPheonix [MediaMiner Member] On: September 14, 2006 16:26 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Not half bad, its survival asylum futuristic meets inuyasha, instead of Survivor meets inuyasha (which, I have to say, that idea disgusts me). Keep writing, this one looks interesting. One question, Kouga and he other demons only see Inuyasha as a half, and he's disrespected by both sides. How can they even tell he is a half demon, if demons are animal human hybrids? Scent alone? In addition, are all the half-demons low class and uncouth like Inuyasha? Just asking in terms of your wtory, it makes things more obvious. Anyway, keep on writing, this story seems to get more interesting.
| Title: Yasraena
Reviewed By: Emotionless_Facade [MediaMiner Member] On: March 29, 2006 00:50 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Aaaahhh! You updated! Oh my god the apocaclipse is coming!... alright, i'll quit with the dramatics, but damn, i thought you had dropped off the face of the earth or something, anyways, I'm off to read the new chapter as I have yet to do, and I know it'll be as good as the others. Ciao! ~_^
| Reviewed By: sabriel7 [MediaMiner Member] On: December 31, 2005 18:28 EST
Comment/Review:
This review's a bit late, but thanks for updating! I can't really blame you for the long in between updating gaps because I do the same thing. -.-' But please update soon!
| Reviewed By: SevenStar [MediaMiner Member] On: October 24, 2005 10:12 EDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
This was the best chapter as far. To bad he use that favor but it's your story to do as you like. Please update soon.
| Reviewed By: Maggie [MediaMiner Member] On: October 22, 2005 02:08 EDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Great story! I love how everyones in character and that you're not rushing Inuyasha and Kagome's relationship too much--its very endearing and more fullfilling then reading overly mooshy stuff. I'm sad that it seems you don't update quick but--what can ya do? ^^;; Thanks for sharing your story with us! Much love!!
| Reviewed By: sabriel7 [MediaMiner Member] On: September 13, 2005 21:00 EDT
Comment/Review:
I LOVE this fiv, I really do! And thanks again for that help with finding 'Trascending a Dynasty'. Please update soon, I'm dorry this review couldn't be longer.
| Reviewed By: Lil'Inu [MediaMiner Member] On: August 30, 2005 16:01 EDT
Comment/Review:
i liked this chapter. fun and relaxing. did Inuyasha not want to get in the water because he didn't want Kagome to see his brandings? well anyway. loved the chapter, can't wait for more. up date soon and keep up the good work!!
| Reviewed By: Lil'Inu [MediaMiner Member] On: August 11, 2005 02:40 EDT
Comment/Review:
it's starting to become laughable how naive those people were when they planed this trip. Inuyasha has a point when he says it was stupid to not bring any weapons. i know they didn't want people to get hurt but they seemed so conserned when they saw the eye of that bird in the beginning, then they decide it's a good idea to bring nothing to defend yourself with? stupid if you ask me. i agree with Inuyasha and Kagome. it's stupid of Sango to think the same laws on Earth aply on the new planet. things don't transfur over that easily, you have to change your rules to best sute your surroundings, i don't think the demons were wrong to search out other food. they had a good idea they just weren't prepared for the outcome. learn from mistakes. i have to admit i almost laughed when Sango said she wanted to have a trial for them. she's being ignorant of the siduation and acting like they are back in the city. i think she's going to find that her military rules won't help her out this time. also the Omega symbol on Inuyasha's neck. that's the symbol for murdur isn't it? it's for Kikyo's death. that's why Shippo had such a strong reaction to it. out of all of them Inuyasha has the best bet of staying alive at this point. he may be acting like an ass but i think he has his reasons and has the best chance of learning from his mistakes and addapting to survive. they're in the world of animals, normal living standurds don't aply. the street people should know that better than any of them.
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