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| "Memory" Reviews/Comments [ 4 ] | Title: Memory
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: January 12, 2006 17:19 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
| Title: ffrg review
Reviewed By: angelica incarnate [MediaMiner Member] On: May 30, 2005 11:59 CDT
Comment/Review:
Hi, thanks for submitting to ffrg. It's good to see so many writers in search of serious reviews to improve their work. Starting with a dream is always an interesting thing to do as it gives a brief insight into what seems to be the main conflict of your story--Kagome's forgotten promise. So, as I said, you have an interesting start. You have some nice little details in your style of description as well (example, the hand emerging from the blankets to hit the alarm). But you also have some room for improvement. There are a number of careless typos, a letter missing at the end of a word, two letters switched around, a missing word... simple things that happen when one is typing and reading too quickly. Make sure you read carefully before uploading or if you want/don't have one, go find a good beta reader. Also, your story jumps around rather suddenly. I realize you are probably trying to only focus on the places where actual plot material is occurring and don't want to drag your readers through, say, Kagome's classes, but be careful that your transitions are smooth and help to indicate a passage of time. Right now, they are rather choppy and abrupt breaks in the train of thought and it tends to draw the reader out of what is going on in your story world. Good luck with your work and thanks again for seeking us out for opinions.
| Reviewed By: Megumiinelite [MediaMiner Member] On: May 22, 2005 18:18 CDT
Comment/Review:
Nice fic so far. I'm really enjoying it, but some of your tense (then, now, future, past that sort of thing) is jumpie and switches around ^_^; if ur lookign for a beta reader I'd e happy to help.
| Title: awww....
Reviewed By: InuYashasLoveLorn [MediaMiner Member] On: May 21, 2005 16:16 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
awwwww... so cute i love Sesshy!!! ^__^ keep up the good work and update again soon please?
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