| "Those amber eyes burning into my soul" Reviews/Comments [ 9 ] |
Title: Those Amber Eyes Burning Into My Soul
Reviewed By: star stalker [MediaMiner Member] On: October 18, 2004 22:27 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Evil! Evil! Evil! How could you just leave us like that? Evil cliffhanger! >_< Please please please please please please please please please write more soon!
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Reviewed By: LittleVoicesTalkinInMyHed On: May 30, 2004 12:42 CDT
Comment/Review:
({_.})({_.}) you must update now or else!!!!!!!!! O
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Reviewed By: LittleVoicesTalkinInMyHed On: May 30, 2004 12:41 CDT
Comment/Review:
({_.})({_.}) you must update now or else!!!!!!!!! O
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Reviewed By: LittleVoicesTalkinInMyHed On: May 30, 2004 00:38 CDT
Comment/Review:
It is 1:35 a.m.! I stayed up this late to red this story ( i started at like 1:00) and you haven't finished it yet !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!! UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am losing my sanity here!
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Title: RealllllyyyyyyyyGooooooooooooodddddddd!
Reviewed By: JasmineScent On: April 26, 2004 20:39 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 5 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Comment/Review:
This is really good but you did left me on suspense with her getting all bitten up and then that pshycoatic Enishi coming and making a scar on all of her face that is so wrong. And then kenshin turning into battousai and hurting her? thats wrong too. but anyways i'm still really interested on how it's going to turn out. I say your story is original because peple say that when kenshin turns into battousai he woudn't hurt kaoru but in this case he did. so i really like it. Keep up the good job and keep updating. Love your story can't wait for the next chapters ^_^
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Reviewed By: silverdemon87 [MediaMiner Member] On: February 29, 2004 02:01 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Okay... Um... You did a good job with this fic but... MAJOR grammar check. I read the first paragraph of the first chapter... You lost me. I scanned the rest of it. I kinda got it but I didn't get it if you know what I mean. Your idea for this fic was unique but I think you can do better than this. ^^ Just my opinion though. Also, try not to use the same phrase over and over again throughout your fic. It takes away the impact of your statement. Try using synonyms or words that mean the same in your fic. They're really helpful ^^ If you absolutely have to use the same phrase, let it be full of impact. Just read the example I posted on the bottom. In the first chapter, I think the change from Kenshin to Battousai was a LITTLE bit TOO fast... I think, and you don't have to do this even though I strongly suggest it, you can have a bit of a conflict between the Rurouni in Kenshin and the Hitokiri. You don't have to have an actual conversation but just sort of have Kenshin think or feel like this. This is just an example. Kenshin jumped away, panting. His eyes were a hard violet, focused and intense. Something had tugged at his mind as soon as he began his battle with Shishio. He felt an all too familiar feeling rise up in him. The feeling to eliminate the enemy. The feeling to kill. He wanted to feel what he felt ten years ago during the Bakumatsu. He pushed this dreaded feel away but it kept coming back, tempting him. Now, he wasn't sure if he could keep supressing it. He wanted to let it all go. Just let it all go... Well... That's what I mean. Heh, I know, it's bad. *sighs* But it's just an example! Don't take my advice if you think it's stupid! Hehe... N E ways... I hope you update. It's really interesting. ^^
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Reviewed By: fat albert On: February 08, 2004 20:10 CST
Comment/Review:
when r u gonna write the next chappy? if u dont write it soon, i might b forced to commit scuicide.
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Reviewed By: jggggggggggggggggg On: February 06, 2004 18:06 CST
Comment/Review:
You evil person! it was getting so good and u lest us at a cliff hanger! sniff, sniff. pls hurry up and write the next chappy, i cant wait! (\ /) (^_^) (")(")
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Reviewed By: KieriTenken On: November 26, 2003 23:06 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
AAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! OMG I can't belive you stoped their!!!! :'( And it was just getting good! ^.^ Ooooohhh! I hope kaoru wins! Love da story.
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