.hack//Legend Of Twilight Bracelet Fan Fiction ❯ In All My Bitterness ❯ Chapter One: Which Of Us Do You Love? ( Chapter 2 )

Chapter One: Which Of Us Do You Love?

 

Anissa bolted off the plane, laughing hysterically. One of the flight attendants was flirting with her rather pervertedly, and she smashed the slice of cake in his face.

 

Was she really all that appealing to the point where a teenage boy in his late teens stroked her leg and nearly kissed her neck lovingly?

 

Apparently so.

 

"Men these days!" she scoffed loudly and laughingly as she walked past a group of boys a few years younger than herself.

 

She paused in the middle of a hallway and pulled out a post-it note with an address written on it sloppily in red pen.

 

Half-way through reading, she mentally berated herself for writing down an address she knew by heart on paper. Being away from her friends and family for so long was really taking its toll.

 

Anissa was overjoyed at the chance of meeting everyone again. She was looking forward to it with the most anxious behavior she had ever shown. It was two people that was really on her mind. Two people who Anissa really wanted to see over all of the others.

 

Shugo.

 

And Kayane.

 

At the thought of Kayane, she went back to when her sister told her and everyone else to call her by Kayane, since it was a more used name. Alyssa would be her legal name for those she did business with or such.

 

Despite the fact that Anissa still wanted to call her sister by her given name, she couldn't break the habit of calling her Kayane as she had done so many times more in the game.

 

Anissa wondered if Kayane ever felt under appreciated when she was called Kayane and not Alyssa in the real world.

 

Anissa pushed through the exit doors of the airport and mentally praised herself for remembering to wear a jacket for the chilliness of Hachinohe, Japan.

 

She glanced at her watch and estimated that she had around four hours of time to kill and walking to her mother's 'house' from where she was would only be about an hours walk. But there were many shops along the way. A shopping spree did not sound bad for her first day back to her home.

 

Laughing, she ran up the sidewalk, weaving past the crowds of fellow Japanese adults and earning a few shouts and glares at her back. One shout in particular though caught her attention and she stopped, turned around and looked at the owner.

 

"What are you doing back here, Anissa? Don't you know to stay away from trouble?"

 

Grinning, she waved at the owner of the bread shop she had just passed, Mr. Kirinata, and took a piece of bread from his sample boxes along the streets.

 

"Love the bread, Mr. Kirinata! Better than ever before! I'll be back with some money soon!" She dashed off then decided to drop all of her stuff off at her mother's house before shopping around.

 

She would be faster without the weight of a backpack, and two suitcases wearing her down.

 

(-)

 

Anissa took in a sharp breath when she entered the main room of her mother's mansion. It was no longer gold and... how to say it... over-used looking, so to speak. It didn't look like her mother spent hours sitting with three people, getting drunk then fucking everyone in the room.

 

But maybe it was just for show.

 

Blinking, she almost didn't recognize the place and walked forward in the direction of where her old room would be. She walked up the stairs and stopped at the second floor, heading down a hallway that had a long red carpet leading the way right to her former bedroom door.

 

Was she really that expected to show up?

 

Anissa shook her head then went into the room, finding it was exactly the same as she had left it. Only thing out-of-place was an fancy piece of paper with a short amount of instructions.

 

'Put all your items away wherever you prefer then be in the main room at 7:00pm.

-Mom'

"Uh huh. Seven o' clock. That's... only an hour away. The hell am I going to be able to do in that amount of time? Raid the kitchen and find one thing I know the name of and eat it?" Anissa rolled her eyes and pulled out her weeks worth of clothes. "I hope I don't have to wear anything fancy cause I don't have anything close."

 

Anissa packed up her clothes, making them fit inside her dresser, and set up all her beauty items in the bathroom. Surprisingly, it took her a half hour to do so.

 

Anissa sighed, disappointed in herself that it took her so long and that she didn't take longer. She looked up at her mirror and winced at the haunting sight. The sight of her supposed other half, evil, and looking more like Kayane than Anissa herself, haunted Anissa ever since that fateful day in The World. The last day that everyone, Balmung, Rena, Shugo, Kayane, Tengaki, all of them, had been on at the same time. Only Shugo and Kayane knew, and that was a reason she wanted to see them again so much.

 

"You're useless. You've been hoping your sister and Shugo will be here cause you miss them and are still afraid to look at your mother. At me. You couldn't live without them, without her, five years ago and you can't now. You had to move to the other side of the planet in order to survive barely. You're pathetically dependent." (1)

 

"If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be mocking me right now, Tera."

 

The only thing Anissa was grateful for at the moment was that Tera could choose when to appear, and didn't choose every moment there was. She wasn't, however, grateful that Tera could also choose who to show herself to.

 

Anissa glanced away from the mirror, ignoring the reflection laughing at her then down at her clothes already put away. All she could really do was put on headphones, and listen to her portable cd player as she walked around what she could of the house.

 

She met up with an old man who had worked there for as long as she could remember and greeted him quite stranger like. Despite this being her longest home, she felt like a stranger, as if living in America had broken her ties with her home and erased all familiarities to Japan.

 

Anissa didn't like it.

 

"Five more minutes," she sighed, not looking forward to being in the same room as her mother. While giving herself then two-cent tour of her own former home, she noticed that she had not seen one trace of her sister, Shugo, or anybody that she knew. It looked like they weren't invited when she hoped they were. Anissa had at least figured her sister would be invited with the groom being who he was.

 

Guess mom had her way, probably, Anissa thought, coming to the stairs leading both upstairs and downstairs to the main room, where she was instructed to meet.

 

"I might as well have some fun," she grinned and slid down the long, spiraling banister, squealing when she thought she might slip off. Landing with a thud and stumbling forward a bit, she ran the rest of the way to the main room.

 

Running through the doors, she slid toward a table with an ice block carved into the shape of a swan. "Oh shit!"

 

Closing her eyes, she turned on her heel, still sliding, and tried to run the opposite way.

 

Nothing happened.

 

Her feet weren't touching anything solid, they weren't touching anything at all.

 

"Five years and you still run like your being chased by dogs."

 

Anissa opened her eyes and glared, kicking her legs draped over his arm. In realization of who's arms she was in, she squealed and hugged him in the position she was in. "Shugo!"

 

"In the flesh," he smiled. Shugo ran his eyes up and down her frame, taking in her clothes, hair, shape, everything. Anissa still looked like his Anissa from five years before but she looked like so much more. So much more.

 

"Put my daughter down now, young man!" a shrill voice echoed through-out the room.

 

Glancing back at the entrance doors the rooms, Anissa and Shugo recognized the owner of the voice as the bride. Also known as Anissa's mother.

 

Looking at her mother's hair, clothes, and skin, Anissa realized how much her sister and her mother really did look alike. Even though her sister wasn't there, she still remembered Kayane's face. It was hard to forget when her sister was the first person to lose contact with her. It was hard to forget and forgive.

 

Shugo set Anissa down as asked, and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. Even when he saw Anissa's mother nearly three times a week, he never got over the nervousness that she might do something rash since of the fact that he and Anissa were going out. It was unnerving also that her mother had brown eyes that seemed to remind him of Kayane for some strange reason.

 

Thinking about Kayane...

 

"Why isn't Kayane here?" Anissa asked, a firm and confident tone in her voice. Even though she almost positively knew the reason, she had to ask. She had to hear her mother say it out loud, that even after all the times Kayane had forgiven her and let her mother have the chance to redeem herself, her mother still did not accept or approve or even want to have anything to do with Kayane.

 

"Kayane will not be here until later tonight or early in the morning, along with Taryn. They have some businesses to take care off and flights last a few hours."

 

Anissa blinked, not believing what she was hearing. Had her mother just said that Kayane would be here, give or take a few hours? "Re-really?" Glancing up at Shugo, she let out a short laugh, and jumped around in circles, and threw her arms around Shugo's neck, swinging her feet around.

 

"What, don't I get a 'hello' hug?"

 

Anissa looked over her shoulder, arms still around Shugo's neck, and looked that familiar voice. "Rena!" she shrieked, seeing her old friend standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips.

 

Exchanging hugs, they greeted and talked endlessly and in hyper moods. Rena introduced Miranda to Anissa and things went well.

 

Things were returning to normal. Slowly, but it was becoming more normal by the minute.

 

Even Tengaki and Balmung had shown up, the two people she had least expected to show up. Anissa had expected Balmung to either never get an invitation or be too busy managing his own company and Tengaki to be... well... Tengaki and not come because he simply forgot.

 

Apparently, even though things were almost normal, times change and so do people, albeit very slightly in Tengaki's case. He was last to show up, half an hour after Balmung arrived at seven forty-five.

 

Now there was only a couple more things left before things were completely normal again.

 

And that was for Kayane and Taryn to show up.

 

That would make Anissa's entire lifetime worth-while.

 

"Now, since everyone is here, with the exception of two people, let us begin the conference I called you all for."

 

If Kayane and Taryn showed up to add conversation and excitement during the 'meeting', Anissa would willingly do anything for her sister. Just don't let Anissa sit in a room and listen to her mother talk for an hour.

(-)

 

Anissa crossed her legs and tapped her foot impatiently. Her sister didn't come when she had hoped and it had been two hours that her mother had been talking. It was ten forty-nine and Anissa was getting more impatient for her mother to finish talking.

 

At least she didn't assign seats like they were first graders and let them choose for themselves. Otherwise, she was sure that Shugo would have been put on the opposite side and ends of the table, rather than right next to each like they were now.

 

Shugo seemed to be listening to what her mother was saying, leaning forward, arms crossed with his elbows on the table, looking straight at her.

 

Anissa didn't believe it for a second.

 

How could she when their chairs were less than three inches apart and his knee was touching her own. If Shugo had really been listening, he would have had his chair leaned back, one arm draped over the edge, one on the table, and one foot crossed over the other for comfort, his knee still touching hers.

 

Weird, yes, but that was Shugo. If he wanted to listen, he had to be comfortable or he would spend half the time trying shift positions. And touching her, apparently, was still part of being comfortable.

 

And Anissa didn't mind one bit.

 

"All right, do you all understand what your placements for the wedding are?"

 

Anissa blinked all of a sudden, seeing a few people scooting their chairs back and nodding in response to her mother's question.

 

"Wait, I don't!" she blurted loudly, raising her hand like an obedient and naive child.

 

"You're the Maid of Honor, Anissa," Shugo murmured to her, looking over his shoulders casually. Standing up, he pushed the chair in and held out a hand to Anissa, smiling. "And I am the Best Man."

 

Anissa looked up at him confused and took his hand. "Okay, I'm Maid of Honor, you're Best man. Does that mean anything?" Five years had given her time to grow a few inches but Shugo had completely grown at least eight inches and was almost a foot taller. So far, everyone she had met up with again was at least three inches taller.

 

And Balmung. He was taller than ever. He was already a foot and a few inches taller than her five years ago and he seemed to have grown another few inches.

 

Now she wondered how Kayane would look standing next to him now.

 

"It means we walk down the aisle together and we have to practice our unison as well." Shugo pushed in Anissa's chair then turned around half-way to walk back to the preselected rooms.

 

Anissa mentally thanked her mother then breathed in sharply when Shugo laced their hands together.

 

Yep. Things were definitely going to return to normal.

 

A cold chill went up her back suddenly, glancing at herself in a mirror across the room. The reflection was there again. It gave her a disapproving glare then snorted, shaking her head.

 

"Pathetically dependent."

 

The word echoed in her head, reminding her relentlessly of Tera's words.

 

As much as Anissa hated to admit, she didn't know whether to believe Tera or not.

 

Anissa looked up at Shugo when he stopped and looked at her, then at the same mirror, then back.

 

"Don't tell me..." Shugo's eyes narrowed considerably and his hand tightened around hers, glaring at the mirror despite the fact that he saw only his reflection. "Is she still there, taunting and mocking you?" he snarled.

Everyone else had left the room, it was only Shugo, Anissa, and Tera, albeit in the spiritual plane.

 

"Does she still try to overpower you?"

 

Anissa glanced over at the mirror, seeing her reflection, Shugo's and Tera's. Only her reflection and Shugo's was in the background, behind Tera's, like it was unimportant, overshadowed by Tera's presence.

 

"He doesn't care for you, girl. He cares for your vulnerability and what you once were. You are not the same person as five years ago. You're still dependent, but more darker, facing the world on your own, unable to hide in someone's arms."

 

"You're lying," she murmured, a strange pressure building up behind her eyes. "You're only jealous because you can never have what I have." Anissa ignored the murmur of surprise from Shugo and stared hard at Tera, focusing on holding back the water filling in her eyes.

 

"I don't have human emotions, remember? And have you overlooked my telepathic abilities as well? You only lie when you are jealous of something, and I have no human emotions, jealousy included."

 

Tera let reflection be shown to Shugo, watching the way Shugo's eyes widened then narrowed. If she had emotions, she would have laughed in delight and amusement.

 

"If you didn't have emotions, you wouldn't think I am pathetic."

 

Tera rolled her eyes, snorting in disbelief. Anissa really should have understood and known the difference by now. "How many times must I tell you? I have emotions, just not those of a humans. I feel you are pathetic because you are a small shadow of myself. Its an insult to have you as my hostess. I would rather have your sister as a hostess than the pathetic being that is you."

 

"Why my sister? Why not someone more powerful, like my mother? Why not her when she's got my sister forgiving everything she does when I don't?" Anissa did not feel the tears in her eyes any longer, only anger and insult.

 

Tera only had one reaction to her question.

 

A smile.

 

"Why, because your mother had to depend upon many different people after her divorce and your sister did not depend upon anyone for years. You're living in the past. She is not," Tera replied coldly and surely.

 

"But Kayane lived with our father!" Anissa shouted, wondering how Tera knew all of this when she only began to exist a little over 5 years ago.

 

"But she didn't have to fend for herself but she did. Kayane didn't want to depend upon her father." Tera looked pass Anissa and at the wide wooden door then smiled a fanged grin, eyes glinting. "Speaking of Kayane..."

 

Anissa looked down to the ground, contemplating Tera's words, then looked behind her when the entrance door into the entire house opened.

 

Speaking of Kayane was right.

 

Her sister had just walked through the door, carrying a couple book-bags and waiting for someone to follow through the door.

 

Anissa glanced up at the grandfather clock in the room, ignoring the faint reflection of Tera in the glass and reading that the time was now half-past eleven. Was Tera talking to her for that long? Had their conversation truly lasted for almost an hour?

 

"Kayane?" she managed to croak, amazed by how Kayane still had the knack to show up in the middle of something and save her from further impatience or anger, or insults. Kayane had not heard her, she was too busy scoffing at something Taryn has loudly yelled. Swallowing hard, a smile creeping onto her face, Anissa started to walk toward her sister. "Kayane!" she laughed, hoping her voice would be enough to falsely convince Kayane that Anissa had only spoke once.

 

Her voice was finally heard.

 

"Nissi?" Kayane looked away from the front door to behind her to the right and nearly fell backwards when Anissa jumped on her in a hug. Smiling a bit, Kayane hugged her younger sister back. "What's new, kiddo?" she laughed.

 

Anissa let go of her sister finally, grinning at the familiar face of her sister. "Nothing much, nothing much at all," she smiled, looking over her shoulder to hide the look of remembrance and mentally begging Shugo to not mention Tera at all.

 

She looked back at her sister, seeing the same wise, green eyes she had looked up to for her entire life and Tera's words came back into mind.

 

And so had her previous thoughts from earlier in the day.

 

'...You couldn't live without them, without her, five years ago...''

 

And she couldn't forgive her either.

 

Her sister that cared the most about her more than her father and mother left Anissa alone to deal with her troubles alone.

 

Anissa could never forget it.

 

And her thoughts and beliefs that everything would be back to normal disappeared and a new realization dawned on her. The truth. Things would never be the same again, people changed, and times never stayed the same.

 

Kayane abandoned her. Shugo loved who she once was. Rena has a new best friend. Her parents are getting back together. Tera was right...

 

She was living in the past.

 

Only thing was...

 

How was she going to get out of the past...

 

And to the present?

 

She was going to have a lot of questions to answer and plenty of problems to solve if she wanted to find out how to move on.

 

Anissa yelped when she was picked from behind, around the stomach and spun around. After being set on the ground, Anissa spun around to yell at whoever had the gall to pick her up like they did and her jaw dropped.

 

"Taryn?" Anissa doubted that Taryn would ever grow out her short, auburn hair but she did. Taryn most definitely did. It wasn't just barely past the shoulders anymore, it was long, down to just above her mid-thighs, long. And it looked more red, more fluffy and it matched her light brown eyes a lot better. "Oh, my god, you look so different!" she squealed, jumping up and hugging the older teen that was like an older sister who was also like Kayane's twin.

 

After she was hit on the back of her head by Taryn for cutting her hair, Anissa led the way up the stairs to the remaining rooms on the floor. As they passed the closed door of Shugo's room, she felt guilty that he had left without even saying he was going to him room, and then shrugged, deciding to make it up to him in the morning.

 

"Here they are. Right next to each other so you two don't have to travel far to fight," Anissa smiled, noticing that the doors both were white, and untouched. All other doors of fellow guests had already been decorated by those sleeping inside the rooms. Her own had been painted black years before when her mother was out of town for the night on business. No one had been there to stop but Shugo and Riley had been there to help.

 

"Thanks, Nissi," Kayane murmured, staring at the door.

 

Anissa barely had time to see the clouded look in Kayane's eyes before it was gone and Kayane gave a brief smile before opening the door then disappearing behind it. Turning to Taryn, who had remained out in the hall, Anissa forced a smile.

 

"Night, Anissa." Taryn glanced at the door for a moment, then turned back to Anissa. "Don't mind Kayane, she's on edge cause she's still surprised that her mother invited her to take part in the wedding," she whispered hurriedly, then giving a wide grin accompanied by a mischievous wink. "Talk to you later."

 

Taryn disappeared into the darkness of her room and Anissa was left ponder on what she said. "I don't think its just that, or its just her, Taryn. I think we're all on edge..." Anissa turned without another word toward her own room and stopped as she came to Shugo's.

 

If Shugo loved who she used to be, did she love who Shugo used to be?

 

Had Shugo changed as well to where neither of them would love who the other changed into?

 

Would she really have to move on and forget about Shugo?

 

About her past?

 

Anissa shook her head, not wanting to bring up all these questions at that time of night, and continued on to her room. "And people say I don't think enough," she muttered, walking briskly. Anissa scoffed then turned to walk into her room, hitting the faded black door and landing on the ground with a loud grunt.

 

She stared at the door in shock and anger, an angry and embarrassed blush rising to her cheeks as she kicked the door once in frustration. "And maybe I should keep my fucking mouth shut." Anissa stood up, turned the knob, and walked through the door way, shutting the door with a slam.

 

"This night has been too dramatic if you ask me," she muttered as she jumped onto the bed hugged her pillow, drifting to sleep, a few words escaping from her lips in a sigh. "It needs to end..."

 

 

--------------

 

 

(1) No, Anissa is not crazy. Its like having a ghost haunting you but the ghost only being able to appear in mirrors or reflective items. Tera dwells in her mind, as part of Anissa's head and part of her judgment since Tera, as said in the story, is pretty much the darker half of Anissa's soul able to move about and voice its separate, unique opinions. I needed a bit of drama and I figured since this stories will probably have quite a few spoilers for Sakura Blossoms, I might as well add in this one for the first, since I would have to sooner or later, okay? So sue me. I could use the money since Anissa is my own character and the plot is my own as well. ^_^ ---

 

Revampment again. w00t. R&r please.

-Arisa