Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ A Tale of Two Wallets ❯ Going Neko ( Chapter 12 )

A Tale of Two Wallets

(An Altered Destiny)

Written by Jim Robert Bader

Proofread by Shiva Barnwell

Kasumi was on her way to the laundry room when she discovered, to her considerable surprise, that the door to her bedroom had somehow been pried open. Wondering how she had let a thing like that happen, she naturally felt inclined to investigate, only to discover with considerable surprise that the door had not so much been left open as forced off its hinges!

Kasumi was just about to go ask her father if they had been experiencing any sort of burglar activity in the neighborhood of late when she caught the sight of something laid out on the floor, and with a mild start of surprise she discovered that it was the cat Nabiki had named Sham-chan hunched down on the carpet staring at one of several books that lay open as though thoroughly engrossed in a study of the contents.

"Oh my," Kasumi said as she approached, startling the cat, who gave her the most "deer-caught-in-the-headlights" (or maybe that should be cat-with-paw-caught-in-the-fishbowl) expression, "What are you doing there, little one? What's that you're looking at?" She knelt down beside the cat and read with some surprise, "A Chinese-Japanese dictionary? Now why would you need that?"

The cat eyed her in a most peculiar, speculative kind of way, but as it seemed to be considering its options Kasumi reached down and began stroking her fur, smiling fondly.

"My, what a clever animal you are," Kasumi mused, "But I've never heard of a cat understanding how to read, so I guess you just found these lying there, which is odd as I'm sure I put everything away the last time I did any reading."

The cat was just beginning to react to this when the elder Tendo daughter picked her up and drew her into her lap, petting her fur despite the cat's slight mews of protest. Kasumi's other free hand picked up the books and carefully folded them before setting them back on the nearby bookshelf, then she stood up with the cat in her hands and said, "Well, you're probably hungry, so why don't I get you some of that cream I bought from the market this morning? Nabiki won't be back from school for another hour so why don't you keep me company until she gets home?"

The cat ceased offering resistance but the slight mew it gave could have easily been translated to mean, "And Great Grandmother calls me non-observant..."

Nabiki's Journal Resumes:

I've just had a really weird experience...so where do I begin to describe it?

Class was finally done for the day so I headed off towards Ranma's locker and found my iinazuke standing there reading a note that he must have found inside his locker. I was about to ask him what it said when he looked at me peculiarly and said, "You're name's Nabiki, right?"

"Huh?" I stopped dead in my tracks, wondering what he was on about this time.

He handed me the note and I read it, to my complete surprise and disgust, learning that it was a badly forged copy of my own handwriting saying that I had been kidnapped by villains and that Ranma had to come rescue me in the school theater.

I looked up at him and said, "Is this a joke?"

"You tell me," he shrugged, "Doesn't look neat like the stuff you write. Wanna check it out?"

Well, he couldn't have kept me away if he had locked me in the broom closet, so a few moments later we stepped into the theater, which also doubled as a secondary gym for the Kendo club, and there was somebody I should have expected I would see dressed up in a school uniform with a blond wig, of all things. Sasuke, Kuno's manservant and a ninja wannabe, pretending to be me, the moron!

When we approached him he went into his act, but just as soon as I got close enough to grab him by the collar I gave him a good shake and said, "Listen up, you baka, just what the heck was your idea in drawing us out here? What has Kuno got you doing now?"

"Mistress Nabiki?" Sasuke looked surprised that it was me and not Ranma who had grabbed him. Faster than a shot he slipped out of his borrowed uniform and leaped up to grab a rope dangling from the ceiling. I was still holding the dress when I turned to face him, only to find the floor drop out from underneath me as I fell into a stage trap, landing on my butt as some fool forgot to leave the padding that's always supposed to be underneath it!

I heard Ranma demand to know why Sasuke had done that while I was rubbing my sore bottom, only I stopped as I heard a noise and looked around, sensing movement all around me. I was just starting to orient on what was making those sounds when Sasuke dropped himself in with a stage prop landing atop him. A moment later Ranma leaped down to join us, giving Sasuke a disgusted look before offering me a hand as he asked how I was feeling.

"Like I want to deal with a certain pain in my rump," I growled, only to hear that sound again, and this time so did Ranma.

"W-what?" Ranma gasped as we found Sasuke had fully recovered and was now chortling with glee like some vaudeville low-rent villain.

"Welcome, Ranma Saotome, to cat hell," Sasuke announced, and we found to our dismay that it was wall-to-wall cats in that dread-fall. There must have been a hundred of the ruddy beasts down there surrounding us on all sides. I felt suddenly very nervous, but when I turned to Ranma his expression was one of abject terror.

To make things worse Sasuke tossed fish sausages into Ranma's hands, which immediately drew the interest of the hungry-eyed creatures. Sasuke taunted us some more while I ignored him, staring in dismay at my Ranma. He was starting to look a bit wild in my vision, and then a manic gleam entered his eyes as he rounded on Sasuke and cried, "You idiot! You have any idea what you think you're doing?"

"Well, actually yes," Sasuke replied in some surprise to see Ranma holding up under what had to amount to being one of his ultimate nightmares, "Aren't you scared by all these cats?"

"N-no!" Ranma shook his head in what had to be an incredible display of either bravado or foolishness on his part. I could see that he was shaking from head to foot, but his stupid pride wouldn't let him admit it. He grabbed for my wrist and said, "C'mon, Nabiki...we're leaving!"

Unfortunately he had missed my wrist entirely, so the one who wound up following him partway to the stairs was Sasuke, who protested at once and said, "Master Ranma...do not go that way!"

"Shut up!" Ranma snarled, "And why the hell should I listen to anything you say?"

"But..." Sasuke started to say when Ranma turned the handle of the door and swung it wide-open, "Oh well...you'll be sorry."

I could see that something was blocking the entrance just an instant before Ranma ran face-to-muzzle into a full sized Bengal tiger. Ranma recoiled as if he had been burned by the contact and looked up with a totally wild expression of abject terror, backing away slowly as he gasped, "N-nice kitty...you don't really wanna eat me...do you...?"

"Ranma?" I asked, "Are you feeling okay?"

His reply was astonishing. At first he began to laugh, then gibber like a maniac, then a few seconds later he haunched down and his voice took on a decidedly feral sound, and before my shell like ears I heard the sound of a cat coming from Ranma.

Even the tiger seemed taken aback by the sudden transformation. I saw Ranma's shoulders and head bow as he slowly stood up on one leg, then his arms began to move in what I at first thought was a basic crane posture, but from the position of his wrists I recognized the motions are resembling those of a cat. Adding to this effect was the snarl I heard as Ranma got down on all fours, facing the now thoroughly confused tiger with a fearlessness that was utterly surprising.

And that was when I at long last understood the full, terrible truth about the Nekoken: that when Ranma was pushed beyond the limits of his terror the only way that he could cope was to become the very thing that scared him. In effect he reverted to being a cat before my eyes. His body may have been human, but there was very little that was human in what I saw happen next as Ranma and the tiger came at each other, and then the world around us literally exploded!

I don't think I can quite put into words the next few seconds when all hell broke loose and the cats around us started panicking in all directions. What I do know is that a column of energy burst through the ceiling, and suddenly I found myself airborne, along with Sasuke and the cats. A hurricane was erupting to one side but all I could see was the wooden floor rushing up at me with bone-jarring speed. Then suddenly Akane was right there underneath me, breaking my fall as the two of us went down together in a heap, badly jolted and bruised but otherwise unbroken.

"What the heck is going on here?" I heard my sister gasped, "I came in here following this weird noise and now I find out you and Ranma are in the middle of it?"

"It's kind of hard to explain," I said when I did a double-take and gasped, "What did you call him?"

"Ah," Akane suddenly looked nervous, but she pointed away from herself and said, "Hey! Looks what he's doing to Kuno!"

I turned to see Ranma mauling our resident Kendo blowhard while the Tiger was beating a hasty exit with its tail between its legs. I had about a half-second to react before I realized that this time Kuno was in serious trouble, and if I didn't act quickly he'd most probably be injured.

Normally I'd have let nature take its course, after all the baka was behind the whole mess and had driven Ranma into his peculiar berserker state, so it would have been simple justice. I couldn't have that be on Ranma's conscience, though, so I spotted a piece of fish sausage on the floor and grabbed it, then stood up and called out, "Here kitty, kitty, kitty!"

Ranma desisted in mangling Kuno's face with his "claws" and spotted the fish sausage as I threw it with all my strength towards the nearest window. With a single flying leap he caught it in his mouth and was out said window without missing a cue as I heaved a sigh of relief, then had a sudden jolt as I heard cries from outside and wondered what Ranma had gotten himself into this time.

Akane was only a few steps behind me out the door as we headed out into the schoolyard where we found Ranma atop a high branch in one of our resident trees, clawing away the bark and making contented noises like a cat. As we got near to the base we were surprised to find Genma Saotome and our father had beaten us there. Ranma's father was putting on a dress and a wig before slinging a bag over his shoulder, which prompted me to ask what he was doing.

"Saving the boy's life," Genma replied with a sober a tone as I'd ever heard the man use, "When Ranma gets like this the only way to calm him back down is to make him feel safe and well loved. Back in our old neighborhood a kindly old woman used to do that for him when he was very little. Unfortunately she died a few years back, but I'm ready to take her place now. A man will do anything to save the life of his only son, no matter the sacrifice he must make."

Somehow from the way he said that I honestly believe that he honestly believed that, but as he was about to leap I pointed out the obvious flaw in his reasoning here, "Doesn't Ranma have to, you know, like the person who...?"

I found that I was talking to air. Genma had leaped into the tree before I could finish my sentence. I sighed and counted the seconds until the inevitable happened, then saw Ranma launch an attack on his transvestite father, and a moment later Genma went sailing off towards some nearby bushes. I privately hoped the sprinklers were running as I turned my attention back towards Ranma.

Akane, on the other hand, caught sight of the bag that Genma had been handling, picking it up from where it fell as she deduced at once, "It's catnip. It's supposed to calm cats down, but will it work on Ranma?"

"Might be," I said, giving my little sister a glance out of the corner of my eye, "The only question is...how do we get it up there to him?"

Akane looked around then spotted a student from the archery class, then promptly walked up to him and asked if she could borrow his bow and arrow, not waiting to hear a reply before she turned and had the arrow knocked and ready.

My sister is a wonder when it comes to using her martial arts skills, and if it weren't for the fact that some people like Ranma make her look like a stumbling amateur I would have really been impressed by the perfect shot she made, firing that bag of catnip just a meter away from Ranma. The bag burst open when it hit, spilling its contents all over as Ranma got a good whiff, then I saw him leap from the branch making a happy sound, and with a sudden start I realize that he is coming right at me. At once I fell back, reacting on instinct as though he were about to attack me.

I shut my eyes tightly as I landed on my already bruised rump yet again, and then I felt something fall into my lap and I opened my eyes again, finding Ranma there, curled up like a very large cat. I stared at him in shock as a wave of warmth and contentment washed over me and I heard him start to purr. I was stunned beyond words yet realized that I had never really been in any danger, that even possessed by this madness Ranma would never have hurt me. The idea that he was now submerged into a form of madness unlike anything I had ever heard before just made me feel oddly protective, though at the moment all I could do was stare in shock at his transformation.

I heard another mew and turned to see Sham-chan approaching us with curiosity. I wondered how she had gotten outside of my room, let alone found me here at the school grounds, but before I can even frame the question in my head I suddenly become aware that Ranma is moving, and as I turn to see what he is doing I find his face has moved to within centimeters of mine, and before I know it our lips touch and he...kissed me.

Well, not really a kiss, more like we brushed lips and then he nuzzled me with his nose, but it was the same basic idea, and I froze in shock at what he had done. He went back to purring in my lap while I sat there hearing whispers all around, unable to move a muscle, let alone think clearly. You could have knocked me over with a feather and I'd never have even noticed. All I could think in my mind was that Ranma had kissed me, or tried to kiss me, or had nuzzled me like a cat, which was the same thing as kissing, or in any event he had just done it in front of the entire Furinkan High School!

I don't know if I was upset or anything like that, but later on, when Ranma woke up and began acting normally, he didn't seem to remember the incident, or anything beyond the point where we had fallen into that cat pit. I tried to quiz him about little things but he simply didn't remember. He didn't even notice that I had Sham-chan in my arms, or that my cat was looking at him with what might have been a forlorn expression had she been a human.

"So..." I said after several fruitless moments of trying to initiate conversation, "How are you feeling right now, Ranma? You don't remember anything at all?"

"Well, no," he said somewhat awkwardly, "That's the funny thing about the Neko...I don't remember stuff at all, but when I wake up I feel all right, like I heal back faster if I've taken any kind of injury when...I'm like that. Nabiki?"

"Yeah Ranma?" I replied.

"Did I...do anything weird, or...you know...stuff?" he asked nervously, "People were looking at me pretty funny back there, and...well...when I found myself in your lap and all that..." he looked away and I thought I saw him swallow.

"What sort of...stuff do you mean, Ranma?" I asked tentatively, wondering if perhaps he did know more, or at least suspected more than he was telling.

"The last time...I became like that," he began after several false tries, "I did a lot of damage...tore up some stuff, I might have even hurt some people, I don't know. Pop never told me the details, but after that I tried hard to stay away from...cats...and until an hour ago I'd almost forgot what could happen. I'm...I'm sorry you had to see me that way. I never wanted to put you or anybody else in any danger, Nabiki."

He was concerned about what he might have done to people while in his berserker state, but I had a different kind of question in my mind as I voice my doubts aloud, "I see...so it could have been anyone, not just me."

"What?" he blinked, turning to look my way when the sight of Sham-chan caused him to turn forward again, "Gah...I mean...what did you say? Could have been anyone what?"

"Oh, never mind," I sighed, feeling slightly exhausted. I thought a moment and realized that it was a silly paranoia on my part, that Ranma had picked me out of a crowd, and it was very doubtful that anyone else would have been able to have calmed him. I had to smile though as I added, "I guess you really didn't mean to do that to me, then, did you?"

"Do...what?" he blinked again, still unable to look my way because of Sham-chan.

"You really don't remember?" this time I was smiling and enjoying the sight of him squirming in confusion, "What to cats usually do when they're with somebody they like, Sham-chan?"

"Mreow?" my pet replied, sounding as puzzled as Ranma.

"A-a-what...?" Ranma was now visibly sweating, "What do...I mean...what do they do? What am I supposed to have done?"

I was feeling better by the moment seeing him squirm in very real confusion, so I arched my tone and said, "Something I never in a million years would have thought you'd have the guts to try. You really are a he-tom, aren't you, Ranma? A regular two-legged tomcat. I'd better keep Sham-chan away from you or you might get funny ideas about her."

I'd swear my pet made a noise that sounded even more puzzled than Ranma by that statement.

"You...what...I mean...?" Ranma blinked, then stopped in his tracks and said, "What did I do to you? Could you at least tell me?"

"Why bother?" I asked, continuing on without breaking stride, "It obviously wasn't important enough to you to remember, and if it wasn't that significant, then obviously you don't need me to tell you."

"I...hey, quit it! Don't joke about things like that!" he started to catch up to me when I turned and held Sham-chan out before his face, causing him to back away with a sharp exclamation.

I cradled my cat in my arms again as I smiled at him and said, "I'm going to start calling you Neko-tom. That's my new nickname for you, Ranma-kun, a regular tomcat, a man among men indeed. Just be sure the next time you wait until we're actually married."

"M-m-m-m-m-married?" I heard him sputter as I turned back and continued on my way, and I could swear I heard the sound of Kuno approaching with vengeance in mind. I decided Ranma could handle himself from there and went on about my own business.

The whole incident was weird in more than one sense of the world, but I'm most surprised about my own reaction, considering how much I wanted to kiss Ranma the other night. Teasing him like that was mean, and I guess I was taking advantage of his naivete and inexperience with girls, but I wanted him to think long and hard about what he had done so that the next time he tried it he did it with more conviction.

How will I make it up to him, I wonder? I ask myself that, feeling lighter in spirit than I have for quite a while, and I think maybe I need to reassure Ranma that my feelings for him are as strong as ever...maybe even a lot stronger. I know he cares about me now on a purely instinctual, animalistic level, and that's more than enough to build up a more civilized relationship. Maybe I should try taking him someplace where normal couples go, do something where we're both be on equal footing.

I wonder...what could that possibly be? Ranma is only good at physical stuff, while I'm more the cerebral type, so what sort of middle ground could we find that's normal...?

Nabiki looked away from her computer screen, seeing Sham-chan once more sitting in her usual spot looking at the monitor as though fascinated with the Japanese kanji script of katakana. Nabiki decided to put the question to the only advisor who she really trusted in such situations and said, "What do you think, Sham-chan? Got any ideas where we should go for Ranma and me to be together, like on a date?"

"Mreow?" the cat replied as if puzzled by the question.

"That's what I thought," Nabiki smiled, reaching down to pick up the cat and hold her in her arms as she murmured, "You know what, you little furball? I should be thinking of ways of getting you out of my life. Ranma won't come anywhere near me when you're around, which is going to play hell with my love life..."

For a moment Nabiki thought she saw a look of smug self-satisfaction appear on the feline's face, but decided that was just anthropomorphizing on her part and shook her head to dispel the image. It had been a long day and she was starting to think the Nekoken was contagious...

"Oddest thing is...I can't get rid of you," she sighed, "It would be like doing dirt to your mistress all over again, and I have enough already against my karma. Besides...you're so cute the way you look at me like that...you really do remind me a lot of Shampoo. She could be so cute sometimes...so it looks like I'm stuck with you for the duration."

"Meow," said Sham-chan approvingly, and rubbed her chin against Nabiki's hand, prompting Nabiki to begin petting her behind her ears, just where the cat liked it.

"Maybe when I find out why Shampoo sent you here I can find a way to make it up to her for what happened," Nabiki sighed, "Which brings me back to the question of what Ranma and I can do to top the fun we had this day? Fun...now there's a word I haven't used a lot lately. I can't remember when I last had fun for the sake of having fun...certainly not recently or even before I got engaged to Ranma."

Her hands absently began to play with the sides of the cat's cheeks, then slowly slid down to caress Sham-chan's chin, eliciting a most approved response that encouraged Nabiki to rub her neck and move slowly downward.

"I used to have a lot of fun when I was a kid...and sometimes I've done things with Daddy and my sisters...just not too often in the last year. In fact, the last time we had that kind of fun as a family was when we went ice-skating at the athletic center..."

The cat's eyes widened for Nabiki's hands were now stroking her in a VERY sensitive area around the rough about her chest. She started to flex her claws when she thought better of the matter, actually finding it fascinating to note how the girl had such an instinctive good sense of where to rub to elicit just the right sort of reaction...

"I've got it!" Nabiki smiled, and then swept the startled cat up to where she could look her in the face with a wide grin, "It's perfect, and I can even swing it so Akane and Ryoga come along! That ought to be enough to spur Ranma's interest. Sham-chan...how would you feel about ice skating?"

"Mreow?" the cat replied, feeling a mixture of confusion and acute disappointment...

Nabiki's Journal Resumes:

Okay, so in retrospect bringing a cat to an Ice Rink wasn't such a great idea, but I brought along some friends to look after her, so there shouldn't have been any problem. I mean, who could have expected her to have an encounter with a nutcase like that Shiratori Azusa!

If I'm jumping ahead it's because I'm still boiling mad about the incident. How dare she try and take my pet then call it hers? Who did she think she was dealing with here, a complete idiot? And then that macho-smug-ass partner of hers...good thing my reactions are improving or I'd probably have to get shots for rabies!

Okay, I'll back up and explain. I'd taken Sham-chan and Ranma to the sports center like I'd decided to last night and we enjoyed our day off from school by hanging around the snack area until the time came for Akane and me to go out skating. Naturally the boys just hung back and watched us from the sidelines, even though I'd offered to pay for the rental of two pairs of skates in their size, but they both insisted that we should have fun and that they would be more than happy with watching us skate, the bakas. I'd left Sham-chan with my two assistants, Ryonami and Suzuki, and everything should have been just fine then.

I wish!

We come back after about half an hour of just goofing off like a couple of sisters, Akane seeming to enjoy flexing her skates as much as me, but once we got back Sham-chan was no where to be seen. Ryonami was full of apologies on that, saying that my cat somehow got away from her and tried to follow me out on the side, so I went back into the ring and skated from one end to the other, but there was no trace of her anywhere. My Sham-chan just vanished!

I was more upset about this than I wanted to let on, even though it's not the first time Shampoo's cat has gotten loose by herself. Somehow she always manages to find me later on, so I knew I shouldn't worry, but I had the strangest sense that something was wrong, that Sham-chan was in danger. I think Ranma sensed it too and he tried to help out, even though I knew his help would be more like an early warning device. Still, Sham-chan seems to like him, so I thought that maybe his scent combined with mine would attract her.

Imagine my surprise when we stop by snack bar to get something to eat that I finally spotted Sham-chan being held in the arms of a complete and utter stranger. I at once demanded to know what the girl was doing with my pet when she turns this "cute Kawaii" charm in my direction and pretends to know nothing about it. I was starting to get angry when this blond guy walks up and took Sham-chan away from the girl, who was most upset with him for that, let me tell you!

Turns out this was far from the first time the little twerp tried something like this with somebody else's pet or property, and I was pretty ticked off to find that Sham-chan was acting like she was drugged or something. Once she revived and is aware of her situation she looked at the girl and almost clawed me trying to get at her. There was no doubt from her behavior that she sensed that this girl was her mortal enemy and wanted to leave no question of that by carving her initials in her face. Fortunately the boy seemed to have a soothing touch with animals, too, because the next thing I know both Sham-chan and me are looking up at his handsome face and bright blue eyes, and the next thing we know he's leaning forward to kiss me!

He didn't get very far in the attempt, though, before a bit of sushi struck his cheek and diverted his attention. I turn in the direction the fish slice came from and find Ranma glaring at the other boy with a look you could have used to scrape paint.

"I see," the other boy remarks, "An interesting way to issue a challenge. Very well, I accept."

That's when I finally recognized whom the boy was, and his kawaii partner with him: the infamous Gold Pair, internationally famous skating champions from Kolholtz High School. Before I know it he and Ranma are agreeing to a match on the following Saturday, which sounded pretty much like my baka fiancé getting in over his head, as usual and I'm about to upbraid him when the other girl: Shiratori Azusa by name, comes at me trying to pry Sham-chan out of my hands why screaming something about 'Charlotte.' Several insults and exchanges later I find myself agreeing to share in Ranma's grudge match by pairing off against Sanzenen Mikado and his partner, Azusa!

And the stakes in this little grudge match? Sham-chan herself! Stupid, stupid! If I lose now, Shampoo's going to kill me!

I immediately insisted on finding out just how good Ranma was on skates and-surprise, surprise-I find out pretty quickly! The first time he tries to take a step he winds up flat on his back! I could see this was going to take a lot of work, so we immediately got down to some basic training, only Ranma insisted on switching genders because falling on his face as a guy is supposed to somehow be "unmanly."

I don't know how I ever let things get out of hand this way, and with less than a week to train we're going up against the best martial arts skaters in the business! If I had to lay odds right now I'd bet twenty to one against us, and never mind that promise I made to never bet against Ranma! Still, I can't fault him for trying. Ranma seems ready to do anything once he's been challenged, and with that kind of an incentive he's bound to pick up a few basics by Saturday...I hope.

If not...well, let's just leave it at saying that the results for me will be less than fully pleasant...

Nabiki turned off her computer after closing the files, then smiled as she saw Sham-chan sitting in her usual spot studying the screen with an intensity that was unusual for her species. When she saw Nabiki looking up at her she made a meowing sound that earned a smile in response from her nominal owner. Nabiki reached to scoop the animal up into her arms again and began rubbing her fur, earning a very approving response from the cat as she headed off to bed for the evening.

Setting the cat down she removed her shirt, shorts and underwear then went to get her pajamas out of the dresser when she heard a noise outside and turned in time to catch a fleeting glance of someone falling over.

"Ranma!" she cried and rushed up to the window without a thought of putting anything on, opening her window and looking out to see Ranma laying flat on his back on the roof with a remarkably stunned expression.

For a moment Nabiki was at a loss on how to take this, realizing he had just caught a glimpse of her in the raw and had reacted as though someone had struck him with a hammer. Concern overrode any thoughts of modesty on her part, or even outrage at being spied upon as she called out, "Are you okay, Saotome? It looks like your nose is bleeding..."

"What-ah!" Ranma reacted as his eyes swiveled towards her, and then seemed to bug out twice their normal size before he hastily threw his arms over his face and said, "Ididn'tseenothinghonest!"

"What are you going on about, Saotome?" Nabiki asked, even though she knew perfectly well what Ranma meant and could not keep from smiling as she added, "You aren't turning into a peeping tom-cat are you, Ranma-kun? If you wanted a good look, you only had to ask me..."

"N-No! That's just fine! I mean-everything's fine! I just wanted to ask you something...uh...could you put something on first?"

"Oh?" Nabiki asked with an exaggerated pout, "And am I that ugly to look at? Does the sight of me offend you so much? I didn't know you felt that way, Saotome...sorry if I made you go blind there."

"What are you...?" Ranma started to sit upright to protest this statement when he saw that Nabiki had deliberately leaned forward out the window with her chest thrust forward and a pleasant smile on her face, and for a second there it looked as if he was about to fall right off the roof, but he grabbed it from instinct with one hand while covering his eyes with the other.

"I knew it," Nabiki made her voice sound disappointed, which was only half artifice on her part, "You think I'm repulsive, don't you?"

"N-No!" Ranma assured her, "You look nice! I mean...you're a very pretty girl, and you're a lot cuter than your sister, so...wouldyoupleaseputsomethingon, prettyplease?"

Nabiki decided she had taken her fun to the limits of the situation and said, "What did you want to ask me, Ranma-kun? It couldn't wait until tomorrow?"

"Ah, well..." Ranma kept his face averted, but this time Nabiki saw him sneak a look from behind his fingers, no longer mortally afraid that she was going to throw things at him or hit him, "That's just it...tomorrow when we go down to the rink to skate...you think maybe it'd be all right if I stay in girl form...at least until I get good enough to stand up without falling down? I'll practice as a guy once I'm sure I'm good enough...it's less embarrassing that way."

"No problem, Ranma-kun," Nabiki replied, then dropped her voice an octave and added, "Was that all you wanted to ask me?"

"Uh...no," Ranma replied, "I'd heard these guys we're going up against are pretty good. I'm going to knock that Mikado's block off, of course, but it might help to find out more about his technique. I'd never even heard of Martial Arts Figure Skating before today..."

"And that worries you?" Nabiki asked him coyly.

"No," he at once protested, "I know I can beat him! I can do anything if it's got martial arts in it! I just think maybe we ought to work out a strategy for you so you don't get hurt out there. It wasn't very smart for you to go challenging that nutcase Azusa."

"Don't worry about me, Ranma," Nabiki assured him, "I can take care of myself out there. Let's just work on you learning the basics, then we can attach some martial arts routines and you can do your stuff against Mikado. As for me..." her tone deepened, "There's no way I'm letting that twerp lay her hands on Sham-chan."

"Uh..." Ranma took a great risk and made a partial glance towards Nabiki, then hesitated before looking again, seeing that his iinazuke did not get angry or move away from the window, "You...uh...really don't mind if I...if I...?"

"Have a look?" Nabiki asked, "And why should I hide from my own iinazuke? You planning to come in here and do something naughty with me tonight? I could put Sham-chan outside if you'd really rather sleep in here with me..."

"S-sleep?" Ranma's eyes got wide again and he started to edge away, "Uh...sleep...yeah, right, on the floor...no problem...just like Pop and me..." he slapped himself as if unable to believe what he had just been saying.

Nabiki tried mightily not to laugh at that and said, "I guess maybe that wouldn't be such a good idea, would it? It might give people the wrong idea about us."

"Wrong idea?" Ranma asked, looking and sounding sincerely puzzled.

"Yeah," Nabiki could not keep the tone of mischief out of her voice as she added, "They might think you were going to ravish me before we're married. You're such a guy, Saotome...a real he-man tomcat. I guess Sham-chan really isn't safe around you after all, and neither am I for that matter."

She closed the window while he sat there sputtering in the dark, wondering what the heck she was talking about when comprehension slowly dawned on him, and then he paled and got very quiet, not moving a muscle as he sat there like a stone for the next several hours.

Nabiki turned away from the window with a huge grin on her face, only to catch a slightly disapproving stare from the cat, to which she sighed and said, "Yeah, I know, I shouldn't tease him like that. He's really such a very sweet guy, it's just that sometimes I have to convince myself he's really interested in girls. I mean, we've been seeing each other for several months now and I'm still a virgin..."

"Meow?" the cat asked curiously.

"Oops," Nabiki winced, "Don't tell anybody at school I said that! Daddy's the only one who's supposed to think I'm a virgin...and Kasumi. I don't let people think they can approach me all that much, but I'd hate to admit that I was...inexperienced. Lots of girls think you're still a kid until you've had your first sexual encounter, like there's any big deal about making out with guys our own age. Most of 'em wouldn't know what to do with a woman, and the other half are your typical two-minute wonders. Believe me, Sham-chan, I've heard all of the stories."

"Meow?" the cat asked again, somehow making it sound like a very different question.

Nabiki was fetching her pajamas from the dresser, "Yeah, they pop a girl's cork then hump her silly, sometimes not even waiting until she's lubricated enough so it doesn't pain her, and then they go and blow their wad just as soon as they hit their stride, and meanwhile the girl's left feeling disappointed that it's all over so quickly. I don't want that to be my first time...I want the first guy I sleep with to mean something. I just hope Ranma's got some martial arts training that'll help him keep my attention, like maybe he could last five minutes or so. I won't know until he's ready, and how is he ever going to get ready if I don't work hard at building up his interest?"

"Meow," Sham-chan said again, and this time she sounded thoughtful.

"Well, it's not like it's something you need to worry yourself about," Nabiki said as she turned out the light then slipped under her covers then picked Sham-chan up to place her on her chest so she could rub her from close quarters, "Cats only do it when they're in heat, and it's supposed to be pretty painful, what with the way the male's genitals have those spiky things to hold him in while he blows his wad, and no foreplay either. Some day you'll find this out the hard way."

"Meeow?" the can sounded non-plussed as if actually thinking over the implications of that statement.

Nabiki concentrated on pleasuring the areas that she knew had the greatest positive response from the cat, and Sham-chan endured it all with happy contentment before they both drifted off to sleep together.

Sometime during the night, however, the cat awoke, looked around in the dark, took notice of the sleeping Nabiki and studied her face in the dark for the next several minutes. Luminous eyes finally turned away to glance towards the window, which was mostly closed for the night but had been kept partway open to allow a cooling breeze to filter in. She got up off the bed, giving Nabiki a last glance to one side, then headed for the window and proceeded to force it open much wider.

She thrust her nose into the night air and took notice of Ranma sleeping on the roof facing the night stars, and once again the cat's expression seemed to soften. It silently fought the urge to go to the boy and curl up on his chest, but the knowledge of what kind of response that would elicit put a damper on her temptation. She heaved a feline sigh and slipped out into the night for a pre-arranged rendezvous. It had business to conduct, so it wasted little time seeking out a certain alleyway, where it paused to look around, then made a soft mew on inquiry.

A figure detached itself from the shadows and said, "Took you long enough. I trust you had a very good reason for keeping me waiting, young lady?"

"Mew," the cat said, lowering its head demurely.

"Never mind," the figure said dismissively, "You can make your report once we are alone. Come this way, I found a place to stay, one that will serve our needs more than adequately..."

"Mew?" the cat inquired.

"Yes, that is correct, young one, we are staying here for the moment," the figure replied, "I've had time to study the situation, based on what you told me before, and I have confirmed that the matter is even more complicated than I previously imagined. We will discuss the particulars once you have changed, and then I will tell you of my decision concerning both of your dearly intendeds."

If it were possible for a cat to look worried, Sham-chan made a reasonably good attempt, but she knew better than to argue with her Great Grandmother, so she obediently followed her off into the night towards the Furinkan financial district, all the while wondering if they had all bitten off much worse than they could collectively chew.

One way or another things were moving more quickly than anticipated, and very soon the moment of truth would be upon her: to kill or marry. It was looking as if the question was not as easy as previously imagined, but she was beginning to suspect that she already knew which way she would go in the end. So, apparently, did her Great Grandmother, but nothing less was to be expected of an Elder of Joketsuzoku...

Continued

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