Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ A Tale of Two Wallets ❯ Motorhead Amazon ( Chapter 54 )

A Tale of Two Wallets

(An Altered Destiny)

Written by Jim Robert Bader

Proofread by Shiva Barnwell

Soun was beginning to have a sense of what a negotiating diplomat might feel trying to arbitrate a peace settlement between three very divergent warring factions. To be fair only two of them seemed inclined towards hostilities, Nodoka being her usual calm and congenial self made it hard to get a reading on her feelings. Atsuko was a bit more complex in that Soun could not tell if the half-Oni was directing her hostility at Nodoka, Comb, or the both of them together. Comb was much easier to make out, but even there the effort at trying to remain calm was making her seem both too pleasant to be normal and too much on edge to truly relax, mainly due to the presence of the man she called her husband.

Hairbrush was his name, a broad-shouldered, pleasant-seeming man who was about Soun's age (or thereabouts) boasting the faint wisps of a mustache on otherwise immaculately groomed features. He was not overly handsome, more pleasant in an ordinary sense, bearing a very faint resemblance (if at all) to Genma in his younger days, and obviously in very good shape from the way he carried himself with quiet poise and dignity. He was not an overly talkative sort but he seemed to have a way of causing his wife to curb her natural inclination to be hot tempered.

Atsuko was studying the man in a way that Comb found irritating, but Nodoka was truly getting on the Amazon's nerves, striking up a conversation with Hairbrush that was mostly consisting of an exchange of pleasantries and some wry observations of life in the Chinese provinces surrounding the village of Joketsuzoku. Soun was still trying to make up his mind about the fellow Comb had chosen to marry instead of Genma, seeing in the father of Shampoo the sort of man one would not mind bringing home to meet the family, though he suspected that there was a lot more to Hairbrush than he let show upon the surface.

"So you're a mechanic?" Nodoka was asking right then.

"A machinist, yes," Hairbrush replied in perfect Japanese, "Actually I have a degree in Engineering, but I'm more like the village handyman, a sort-of jack-of-all trades who tends to the equipment and property of other villagers so that things work smoothly enough, from the plumbing to the water filtration systems."

"What a talented guy you are," Atsuko said with a flirtatious smile that earned a murderous glare from Comb beside her, "I'll bet you're very…handy."

"I try to be of assistance to anyone who needs me," Hairbrush shrugged, "Not a lot of heavy machinery in the village, just simple equipment like the well pump that tends to break down every now and then. Most Amazon homes are self-sufficient, but it helps to have a broad range of skills that others value. We most trade by barter, favor for favor, since there's not too much free-flowing cash in our village."

"My, you must be very proud of your husband, Comb-san," Nodoka said, as if completely innocent of the rising tension levels about the Amazon healer as she kept a wary eye on both her husband and rivals.

"Oh, I am," Comb said as evenly as she could manage, "As Atsuko-san noted my husband can be very…handy."

Soun wondered if his proximity to the tea table was a little too close to being at ground zero. Even granted that it was his duty as a host to tend to the needs of his guests, self-preservation would have mandated that he put some distance between himself and the potential war-zone, like maybe as far away as Alaska! Instead his eyes roved to the true source of conflict that was presently playing with a tire in an innocent-seeming panda-like manner. Genma was trying very hard not to draw any attention his way, but every now and again Soun caught his Jusenkyo-cursed friend pausing to watch these proceedings with a most unreadable expression.

If anything Genma's behavior was the most curious thing about the entire affair. On the one hand Genma was terrified of Nodoka finding out about his curse, but also curiously reluctant to leave her alone with both Comb and Atsuko present. Moreover he kept steeling looks towards Comb's husband that were studied and unfriendly. Soun was hardly aware of the exact nature of the thoughts presently flowing through his best friend's head, but it did seem like more than curiosity was causing him to focus attention on the man whom Comb had chosen to marry instead of him. In fact, if Soun didn't know any better, he would have sworn that his old friend was showing signs of acute jealousy, not that Soun could seriously entertain that any such motive was impairing Genma's judgement.

He turned a glance towards the rest of his houseguests, finding there a tense situation going on between Silk and Cologne with the Amazon girls and Ukyo standing to one side observing the tense confrontation. Soun felt strongly tempted to get up and join them, but dreaded to leave the spot where he was since his presence was serving like a dampening rod on a nuclear reactor. He suspected the old woman was not faring well under the scrutiny of the gentle-voiced Lore Master. Even Tofu and Kachu to one side seemed to be regarding the Amazon matriarch in a less-than-sympathetic manner having been appraised to the continuing existence of the blue haired girl whom Soun had heard named as Lotion the Younger.

"So…after all this time," Silk's voice was deceptively calm yet lacked the usual gentle quality that befit her namesake, "My niece is restored to me…alive and well, as it turns out, for which I am most grateful."

Cologne did not meet the younger woman's harsh glare, instead holding her gaze directly down as if she were a child being lectured to by an adult. At a much subdued tone from her usual matronly manner she replied, "Scold me all you want, child, but I did what I did because I judged it needful."

"Oh, isn't that special," Silk's tone was laced with more sarcasm than she ever directed towards Comb, "You might have bothered to inform me that she was coming back from nominal exile. After all, I am only her legal guardian, not to mention her nearest blood-kin. I am a little surprised to learn that you and Grandmother could withhold a thing like this from me. Grandmother was right about my not listening enough to my feelings. They would have told me my niece was alive if only I had listened."

"Cousin," Kachu spoke up, turning to regard the blue haired girl beside her, "It is good to see you well…much has happened in the two years since our parting."

"I know," Lotion smiled in a sad kind of way, "Too much has changed. I've been finding that out the hard way."

"I am with Kachu here," Ambergris said simply, "It is good to see you restored to your proper position, my friend. In spite of the Matriarch's having sent the both of us away for a time, our place is with our people, no matter where they are or what they may be doing."

Ukyo, who stood on the periphery of the conversation talking with Perfume and the twins, Ling Ling and Lung Lung, leaned closer to the Amazon Enforcer and said, "Wow, Kachu's mom's sure raking the old woman over the coals."

"Good," Perfume sniffed, "Great-grandmother deserve it."

"Fishcakes anyone?" asked Kasumi pleasantly as she circulated among their midst holding a tray full of snack-foods she was serving with their lunch.

"From you, pretty sister to Cousin-Airen?" Perfume smiled flirtatiously as she accepted one of the proffered fish cakes, "Perfume much glad, accept anything nice Japanese girl offer."

Kasumi actually blushed as if she understood the compliment and smiled pleasantly at the Enforcer before turning to offer the tray to Tofu and Kachu. Ukyo leaned close to Perfume again and said, "Better watch the flirting, Kasumi's father would definitely go ballistic."

"Who care what dumb male say?" Perfume hummed musically, "She very cute girl, have very nice manners."

"I thought you had your eye set on the blue haired honey?" Ukyo asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Perfume know what Perfume like," the Enforcer murmured back, glancing at Lotion, who caught her smile and returned it with deep affection, "No mean Perfume no have eyes in head, see plenty around her."

"You've become an even worse flirt than I'd heard about in rumors," Ambergris smiled her own way at the Enforcer, "They say in the village that within the last year you have propositioned many and caught the eye of a few, and you number your fair share of conquests among our younger warriors, the ones who are not afraid of you outright."

"It pay have reputation," Perfume said proudly, "Maybe you turn head, make own conquest," she added the latter part with a flirtatious smile in Ukyo's direction.

Much to Ukyo intense discomfort, the pink haired Ambergris turned a sly expression her way and said, "Maybe I will at that. You never know what the future may hold there."

Ukyo suddenly felt the heat of both Amazon warriors and tried to focus her attention away from them to the twins that she had been conversing with, whose command of Japanese was even less developed than that of the Enforcer, "Uh…so…you two always fight side-by-side?"

"Oh yes," replied Ling-Ling, the Cherry-pink haired cherub-faced girl who was especially cute for her high-pitched pigeon voice, "We masters Chinese Dragon attack."

"Only work if both fight together," added Lung Lung, the girl-haired sister who always seemed to finish Ling Ling's sentences for her, "Dragon attack is two-warrior, and we train together since very little."

Ukyo had noted that both girls were of small stature, standing a good ten centimeters shorter than Shampoo herself, and from the way they moved there was almost perfect coordination between them. She wondered how these two would stand up in a fight, so she commented, "Maybe sometime you girls might care to show me this technique of yours?"

The twins exchanged happy grins and tittered like young girls who had just been paid a compliment by a handsome boy. Ukyo inwardly cringed, wondering why she was also so irresistible to the ladies yet had no luck at all with guys her own age, though reluctantly she conceded that it might have something to do with her always pretending to be a guy herself, and long before her trip to Jusenkyo.

A movement caught her eye and Ukyo turned her head to see Comb approaching Cologne, her face dark with emotions that did not bode well for the Matriarch, who seemed to regard her granddaughter with a look of resignation.

"Grandmother…" Comb paused, seemed to consider something in her own mind, then began in a more formal tone of voice, "Matriarch…we need to talk. Shampoo will be home from school very shortly, and when she comes through that gate and learns the truth about Lotion…"

"What do you want me to say, child?" Cologne said tiredly, "That I made a mistake? I thought what I was doing was for the best…"

"Well you were wrong!" Comb all but exploded, only to catch a glance from Silk that seemed to calm her down a bit, "You made an error in judgement, Grandmother, and my daughter paid for it with tears of grief that were shed in error! Do you have any idea what she is going to do and say when she discovers that you have been lying to her these last two years?"

"I know," Cologne all but whispered, her eyes downcast again as she asked, "What do you propose?"

"That you let me talk to Shampoo," Comb said, "Prepare her for the news, try to ease the shock that she is bound to experience. You will let me talk to her because I am her mother, a role you have sought to deny me for most of her life, and once I have calmed her down and helped her to adjust to the discovery that you have been manipulating her all of this time, then I will resume my role as her mother and guardian. She won't want anything more to do with you, not after she hears the full story about why she was sent to you in the first place!"

"And you intend to tell her everything?" Cologne asked, "She may not like learning that you made the bargain with me in the first place."

"I will tell her everything and let her decide for herself," Comb said in brittle anger, "And if she chooses to reject us both, then it will be her right, but you know that her respect for you will never be what it once was. You will have no one to blame for that but yourself… Grandmother."

Cologne was silent for a long moment, then slowly she raised her ancient eyes to meet the glare of her former heir and sighed, "Do what you must. It is time that Shampoo knew the full story…everything, in all its full detail. She is a child no longer and deserves to know the truth. In fact…"

A loud slamming noise brought everyone's attention around, including Kasumi, who was startled to see an enraged Akane standing in the doorframe with hair cut unnaturally short and school uniform ripped in numerous places.

"Akane-chan?" Kasumi asked of her youngest sister.

"WHERE IS SHE???" Akane snarled, "It's only been two days, but when I see her again…when I get my hands on that lying tramp…!"

"Akane?" Soun was shocked, "What is the meaning of this? Who are you talking about? Who…?"

"Not now, Dad," Akane growled as she stormed past the table, followed by the surprised stares of both Atsuko and Nodoka, "Looks like somebody's thrown a party, so many people here, which means…"

All at once her eyes fell on Ukyo and she snarled again, rushing forward past a much-surprised Tofu and Kachu.

"Akane?" Ukyo blinked in surprise, "What happened to your hair? What…?"

Akane's only reply was a bellicose cry of rage as she seized hold of the Bishonen girl with both hands, bearing Ukyo up off her feet with surprising strength before the okonomiyaki girl could react in self-defense, and suddenly Ukyo found herself splashing feet-first into the koi pond, still gripped by Akane who avoided getting splashed herself as she ripped open Ukyo's shirt as though her uniform cloth were held together by thumbtacks.

"HOW DARE YOU LIE TO ME…???" Akane began to say when her gaze fell down and she froze where she was standing.

"Lied to you?" Ambergris asked, glancing from the newly arrived short-haired girl to the now bare-chested Ukyo before her single visible eye went wide and she exclaimed, "Oh my…!"

Ukyo was staring up at the smaller girl hovering over her, face held in shock at her sudden exposure. She-He glanced down at himself, seeing his muscular, bared chest that lay flat beneath the wrap that was normally worn to flatten Ukyo's bosoms. Ukyo lifted his eyes again, met Akane's shocked expression and said, "Do you mind?"

Akane suddenly let her go, backing away with a face that was full of shock and mortification. She started to stammer out an incoherent apology when her foot slipped on the discarded plate of fish-cakes that Ukyo had been holding, and all at once she lost her balance and went splashing into the koi pond.

"Akane!" Soun rushed up just in time to see the duck fight its way out of a dress that had seen better days itself, and for a moment all he could do was stand there and gape in horrified amazement. Ukyo calmly reached down and helped Akane-duck free from her dress, then set her down on the ground before climbing back out of the koi pond, saying in soft undertone, "Well, you've got no one to blame but yourself for this one, Akane."

"Akane?" Nodoka asked as she came up to join them, seeing the empty dress but no Akane, "That's odd…where did she go?"

"A duck?" Atsuko remarked from beside her, "She turns into a duck?"

"Who does what?" Nodoka asked in confusion.

"Oh, you know," the half-Oni replied, "A duck, like in Jusen-MMMPPPPHHH!!!" she broke off as a large furry paw was suddenly clamped over her mouth.

"Pay her no mind," Comb said as she smoothly came to flank Atsuko, laying a firm grip on the half-Oni's wrist before murmuring in Chinese, "<I'll explain later, just keep your mouth shut for once and let me do the talking.>"

Atsuko turned a glare in her direction, but between Amazon and panda she was at a slight disadvantage and could not bring her monstrous strength to bear to free herself from their double-team action.

"[The girl,]" Perfume said in Cantonese as she leaned close to Ukyo, "[She's one of the ones you brought the Jusenkyo water for?]"

"[It's a long story,]" the now-male Ukyo replied, "[I'll tell it to you later.]"

"I don't understand," Nodoka asked in puzzlement, "Where did Akane go to?"

"Oh, you know young girls these days," Silk replied smoothly, "Here today, flown the nest before you know it…"

"But…" Kachu was looking down at the duck as if to ask if this was indeed her transformed little sister.

Ukyo bent down and fished Akane's dress out of the water, then tossed it to one side as she reached for Akane herself, who shied away from him until Ukyo murmured, "Don't worry, I won't hurt you. I'm not mad or anything like that, really. Let me help you find some hot water…"

"Oh my," Kasumi asked as she came smoothly up to join them, "Did Miss P get loose again? You silly dear. Let me take care of this, Father, I'll see to it she's put back in her room safe and sound."

"But…but…I…I…" Soun appeared to be on the verge of one of his crying jags as Kasumi knelt down and picked up her feathered little sister, who did not avoid her contact.

"There now," Kasumi cooed in Akane's avian ears, "Let me take care of everything, I'll have you right again in no time, Imoutochan."

Akane made no protests as she was carried off, but she turned a sheepish glance towards Ukyo before her long neck sagged and she seemed to manifest quite human depression.

"What was that all about?" Ambergris asked Ukyo as the okonomiyaki chef refastened his shirt and tried to ignore his sopping wet condition.

"Like I said," a more masculine-toned Ukyo replied before turning to follow, "It's a long story."

Ling-Ling turned to Lung-Lung and murmured softly, "<You see what I saw?>"

"<How could I not?>" Lung-Lung replied, "<It must be Yaazuniichuan.>"

"<The Spring of Drowned Duck?>" stated Ling-Ling, "<A very tragic story.>"

"<Only why is everyone pretending it didn't happen?>" Lung-Lung wondered aloud.

"<Who knows?>" Ling-Ling asked, then as one the two of them rolled their eyes and exclaimed, "<Elders…>"

Shampoo's Diary Resumes:

Akane did not take the news too well about Kuonji, but given everything that she has been through today I suppose that should not seem too surprising. She got angry of course, but she does that a lot anyway so it was also to be expected, but I was surprised to hear her calling her sister rude names over once again withholding information to which Akane felt entitled, as if it were Nabiki's fault that she can be so non-observant and impulsive. She then ran off before we could offer further explanations about why we had been holding back the full story about Kuonji, and after a moment of pause Ryoga started to chase after her, naturally becoming lost the minute she was out of his direct line of vision.

Naturally we had to chase the fool down, but my wife suggested that we should split up and that I be the one elected to track down Akane, which is sensible since I am the best huntress of the three of us. Ranma is the one best able to find Ryoga and bring him back before he winds up in Mongolia or parts even more distant, and of course Nabiki insisted on accompanying him to make certain that the two brothers do not wind up in another of their pointless brawls, as Ranma is not exactly the most tactful person around, which even I must concede on occasions.

Finding Akane was enough since I reasoned that she would head for home rather than wander aimlessly about town, and once I confirmed this by tracking her movements from the rooftop I considered seeking my airen to inform them of this fact, but decided instead that I would pause and wait for them at the front gates to the yard. I did not want to confront Akane by myself until she had time to calm down, nor did I wish to get involved in my mother's evident feud with Ryoga's mother over Ranma's worthless father. Instead I elected to sit here and compose my diary, recording the events of this day while they are still fresh in my mind so that I can make proper sense of it all. I have no doubt that my airen will be returning at any moment, with or without the stupid Pig-boy, so we can confront Akane as a group and hope for once to make her see reason.

Reason…I am beginning to wonder what that word means anymore. The madness of Principal Kuno aside, I am surprised to learn that I actually enjoyed my first day of classes, even though some of the subject matter is quite boring. The people there are very…colorful, and seeing Nabiki engage in her business like a young Elder in training gives me hope that I may find a place yet in this place that is her homeland. I wonder if there will be many days that offer as many challenges to my warriors mettle, but I suppose in time I will be better able to judge if the experience with worthwhile or not.

I am also wondering about the recent revelations concerning Ryoga's mother and my own, both of them at one time being rivals for a man whom I would not even rate a man but for the fact that he is the father to my beloved husband. True, my father-in-law is a skilled warrior who taught Ranma well, but he is a lying, honorless thief who takes without giving or asking and can abandon a promising young warrior like Kuonji in favor of exclusively training his son. What could mother possibly see in such a man that she bristles at the mere suggestion of another warrior claiming him for her own? And that promise he made to Ranma's mother…I do not understand how any man could to that to a child's mother. Perhaps a wild beast like this half-devil woman might find something appealing in the Shaoniichuan-cursed great-grandson of a Demon, but I would think a woman as proud as my mother…"

"Hey!" Nabiki called up to where she saw Shampoo perched atop the Torii gates to her family's yard, "What are you doing up there, Sham-chan?"

"Airen?" Shampoo smiled brightly, pocketing her diary and slipping it into the folds of her Chinese style clothing before vaulting off the wall to land beside Nabiki.

"Ranma and Ryoga are right behind me," Nabiki revealed, "But I thought I'd run on ahead of those two clowns so I wouldn't have to listen to their bickering for the last several blocks. I was wondering what you were writing in that book I saw you with. I didn't think it could be homework because Sensei didn't assign any…"

"Eh?" Shampoo froze with a "caught in the headlight" expression, then gave Nabiki a blank look.

"Don't tell me you've been keeping a diary, Sham-chan," Nabiki inclined her head with a pleasant smile, "I didn't think you were the type for that."

"Ah…what Nabiki talk about?" Shampoo asked innocently, "Shampoo…Shampoo take notes…about new things she learn today in school. Is no problem, ne?"

"No problem, huh?" Nabiki continued smiling, "Then you wouldn't mind showing me what you were writing. It's not like you have anything to hide from me, right?"

"Hide?" Shampoo blinked, then adopted a sexy smile and leaned forward, "Shampoo no hide from Nabiki. Is Airen who hide from Shampoo when Shampoo want to share time with Airen…"

"I'm not hiding from you now, Kitty-cat," Nabiki said, not backing down this time or flinching from Shampoo's overt display of affection, "I was just wondering why you won't show me what's in your little red book there. Somehow I don't think it's the collected works of Chairman Mao. C'mon, Sham-chan, let me look, you owe me."

"Shampoo…owe Nabiki?" Shampoo blinked her eyes in a pretty fashion.

"Sure," Nabiki replied coyly, "From that time when you rifled through my computer files pretending to be a harmless kitten. Did that give you any ideas about me and the sort of person I am? I remember shortly after that was when you first declared that you loved me."

"Ah…aiyaa," Shampoo murmured, the pulled out the booklet and handed it to Nabiki, who opened it and gave a wide-eyed expression, to which Shampoo grinned and said, "Is in Mandarin Chinese. You no can read, yes?"

"Obviously not," Nabiki eyed her purple haired companion before smiling, "But I have been doing a bit of research, and I could always ask Oneechan to translate for me."

"Eh…?" Shampoo said with a dumbfounded expression.

"Never mind," Nabiki said as she handed the diary back, "Keep your secrets for now, Sham-chan. I need to keep my focus for now on Akane. I take it she's in there?"

Shampoo nodded as she pocketed her booklet, "Shampoo see go in, no come out. Much shouting a while ago, but Shampoo no want to go in and see who fight because it sound like Ryoga and Shampoo mother."

"Can't be them," Nabiki sniffed, "The roof is intact and the walls are still standing. Tell you what, let's give the boys a minute to catch up with us, then we'll go in together and confront Akane. How's that sound?"

Shampoo smiled brightly and nodded, then impulsively threw her arms around Nabiki, who was only mildly braced for the impact, "Airen, you make Shampoo so very happy. We make Airen sister see truth about Ukyo, then maybe we fix things between her and stupid Ryoga, hai?"

"Playing matchmaker, kitty cat?" Nabiki smiled, "Okay, sounds like a plan to me. I just hope Ryoga-kun can stand the nosebleed Akane's gonna give him…"

"There you are, Imoutochan," Kasumi said as she handed Akane a bathrobe after her little sister stepped out of the furo, "I'll wash your school clothes and repair the rips. You really should be more careful around water now that you have a Jusenkyo curse like Ryoga."

"Oneechan?" Akane studied her sister's face with surprise, "You knew about my having a curse?"

"I didn't until a while ago," Kasumi replied, "But when I saw you change…well, that was pretty obvious. I think you surprised father more than you did me, and it is going to take some doing to convince him that having a curse isn't a terminal condition."

"Yeah, I guess he'll take it pretty bad, won't he?" Akane replied with a sheepish expression, "That was pretty clever of you coming up with that story about me being a family pet…"

"Well, it seemed to make more sense than to have to explain to Ranma's mother about curses," Kasumi replied, "After all, we don't want Ranma and his father to have to commit seppuku because of their curses."

"Uh…yeah, I guess that would be pretty bad," Akane shook her head, "Kami-sama, I feel like such an idiot! What I did back there to Ukyo…I'll bet he really does hate me, even though he was being nice enough to say he wasn't…"

"Ukyo is a very nice…boy," Kasumi paused as she said that, "Whatever made you think that he wasn't what he seemed to be, Akane? The way you went after him…even for you that was not typical behavior."

"Ah…" Akane flushed crimson, "No, I guess it wasn't…"

"And whatever happened to your hair?" Kasumi lightly ran fingers through Akane's super-short nape hairs, "Have you been in another fight again, like that time with Ryoga?"

"Uh…well," Akane said with a sheepish expression, "It's…kind of a long story that…"

A light rapping at the door was followed by the sound of Ukyo's masculine voice asking, "Um…hi in there. Is it all right for me to come inside? I'll wait out here if it isn't…"

"Ukyo…" Akane gulped.

"It's all right, Ukyo-san," Kasumi replied, "You can come in here. Akane is wearing some cover."

"Oneechan," Akane winced in embarrassment.

The door slid open and Ukyo-kun stepped into the bath area. He held a backpack in one hand and paused to set it down on the counter by the sink, smiled ruefully at Akane and said, "I owe you an explanation."

"You don't owe me anything," Akane said with her face to the floor, "I'm the one who owes you an apology…"

"He told you, didn't he?" Ukyo gently cut her off.

"Told me?" Akane lifted her gaze, taking in the handsome continence of the young man before her, who looked so Bishonen in his simple dark clothing, long hair done up in a ponytail, but tall and slender as a wand with such graceful poise and dignity in his bearing that it was almost painful for her to look upon him.

"About me not really being a man," Ukyo replied, "At least I wasn't born one anyway. Let me show you."

He turned to the sink and started running the water over his hand, waiting until it seemed sufficiently warm before filling a drinking glass and upending the contents over his head, triggering the startling transformation that reduced his stature by a good four inches. Ukyo turned around to regard the two Tendo sisters, her features now clearly restored to their natural androgynous state as she sighed, "Now do you see?"

"Oh my," Kasumi said, "You have a Jusenkyo curse, Ukyo-san?"

"I do," Ukyo replied, "Nanniichuan, the curse of the Drowned Boy, which I got recently during my trip to China…"

"You had this curse all along?" Akane blurted, hope and dismay warring within her as she tried to grasp this startling revelation.

"No," Ukyo said sadly, "It's complicated, but I guess the easy version is that my pop always wanted a son, and I tried to please him. Actually, that's not the real reason I've been passing myself off as a guy all these years. It has to do with Ranchan and a little promise that was made between our fathers…"

"You mean…that part is true?" Akane gasped, "You're Ranma's…"

"Iinazuke," Ukyo replied, "Past tense. Obviously I don't want to marry him now that he's got two other girls hot to marry him, one of them your sister. Ranchan didn't know about me until the other day, when he must have figured it out for himself, just before you got cursed trying to save me."

"Oh my," Kasumi said, "You're engaged to marry Ranma, but you don't want to marry him? That sounds…complicated…"

"You don't know the half of it," Ukyo sniffed, "Anyway, the reason I went to China was because I convinced the old woman to help me find a cure for you being cursed, the only cure that anybody thinks might work on Jusenkyo curses, only while I was at Jusenkyo I…kind of slipped into one of the pools, which is how I wound up with my guy curse."

"You went there…for me?" Akane asked in amazement.

"For you and for Shampoo," Ukyo said, "And for Ranchan. You guys got cursed saving my butt, which means I'm honor bound to give you this…" she opened her knapsack and removed one of several plastic bottles of water.

"Oh my," Kasumi said, "Is that…?"

"Jusenkyo water," Ukyo held the bottle out, which had a taped-on label with the Kanji symbol for "Girl" clearly marked in felt-tip pen, "This should be just enough to cure you of turning into a duck, so there won't be any need for you to have to explain yourself to your father. I've also got a bottle for Shampoo and another for Ranma, and even one for Ryoga so you won't have to worry about him making a pig of himself. It's the least I can do to try and make things right for everybody."

"But…why?" Akane asked.

"Like I said, I owe you," Ukyo replied, leaving the bottle on the table before closing up the knapsack, "If it wasn't for you and Shampoo I'd be the one with the webbed feet, not you, and a Kuonji always repays her debts. It's giri, my commitment to you, and I won't accept anything less than a 'yes' for an answer."

"Ukyo…" Akane breathed the word, moved beyond words at both the thought and the sacrifice implied in the gesture.

"Oh my," Kasumi spoke up as if just realizing something, "How many bottles of Jusenkyo water did you bring back with you from China?"

"About eight total," Ukyo said, indicating the knapsack, "Six of them are in here, the other two I left at the old woman's restaurant."

"And did you mean to use one of those bottles on yourself?" Kasumi wondered.

Ukyo looked rather uncomfortable as she replied, "Yeah…I'm keeping one for myself…just in case I change my mind about my cursed form."

"Change your mind?" Akane looked at her questioningly.

"Yeah," Ukyo nodded, "I didn't deliberately mean to curse myself, but now that I have it, I thought maybe I'd see if I could use it to force my old man to alter the conditions of his will and maybe let me out of this engagement mess I got myself into with Ranchan…"

"Then…you didn't send that challenge letter yourself?" Akane asked.

"Challenge letter?" Ukyo said in confusion, "What challenge letter?"

"The one that was given to Ranma by that lawyer," Akane replied, "Su Mie, or Su Yu…one of those names anyway…"

"Waitaminute," Ukyo's expression darkened, "You mean from Pop's law firm, Jun Mun Lun? That Jackass! I told him to stay out of this and let me handle things for myself!"

"Never mind that now," Kasumi said, "Oh dear…I just realized something…Ranma's mother is here, and Ranma may return home at any moment."

"Huh?" Ukyo blinked, "Ranchan's…mother?"

"That's right!" Akane exclaimed, "We can't let her see him before he gets himself cured or she might demand he commit seppuku!"

"She might WHAT?" Ukyo reacted in dismay.

"No time to explain," Akane looked at the bottle sitting on the counter, then snatched it up and said, "I hope this works…if it does, then it'll probably work for Ranma."

She took a moment to uncap the bottle, licking her lips as she considered what she was doing. In the two days since she had acquired her curse she had gained a healthy appreciation for what Ryoga and Shampoo went through on a regular basis, but sympathy did not mean she intended to live out her life with the curse of a duck hovering over her shoulders. She was half-tempted to drink the stuff to see if it worked internally, but the thought of putting waters like that into her body made her quail a little, so she did what seemed natural and upended the bottle over herself, praying to the Kami that this would be the answer to at least half of her problems.

She felt a tingling that went down from her scalp to the rest of her body, and a momentary disorientation, but then these sensations passed and Akane straightened up again, looking down at herself with relief as her body was still quite obviously human.

"It works!" she cried in delight, "I'm cured!"

"Oh my," remarked Kasumi, looking at Akane with a most surprised expression.

"Uh…Akane?" Ukyo pointed at the youngest Tendo sister's backside, "I don't think that was quite what we had in mind…"

"Huh?" Akane caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror, and the towel fell from her hands, exposing the rest of her to view, but for once modesty was not an issue. She slowly turned her head, not quite ready to accept what she now knew she would find there, and only by untensing muscles that were not formerly there was she able to convince herself of the reality of the pair of wings that were now sported upon her backside. She unfolded them as far as she could, silently reckoning to herself that she now had a twelve-foot wingspan, not counting the feathers that formed a tail sprouting from her hindquarters.

"Oh my…" she exclaimed, wondering just how she was going to explain this one to her father…

"All right, you can let me go now!" Atsuko growled as Genma-panda had finished hauling her around in back of the dojo, "Now what's the big deal that you don't want Nodoka to find out about?"

"The curse," Comb explained in a low voice, glancing over her shoulder to be certain that the three of them were not within earshot of Nodoka, "If she finds out about Genma and his son…there could be trouble."

"Trouble?" Atsuko repeated, "I thought 'Doca's middle name was trouble. What do you think she'd gonna do if she finds out about the curses?"

Genma-panda started to growl sounds that were indistinguishable to the normal human ear, causing Comb to growl back at him, "Use your signs, fool! You know we can't…

"Seppuku???" Atsuko shot an astonished gaze at Genma, "You mean she what?"

Genma blinked his panda eyes, then spoke to her again. Atsuko waved a hand dismissively and said, "Of course I can understand you, Gemi-chan. What kind of an Oni would I be if I couldn't talk to animals and woodland creatures? You think Fox is my only other language?"

"You talk to the animals," Comb murmured faintly.

"And they can talk to me," Atsuko glared back, "You got a problem with that?"

Genma started to make sounds again, and Atsuko nodded her head encouragingly until she suddenly blanched and said, "You what? Why would you go and make a fool promise like that?"

The panda seemed to shrug helplessly and made a low gruff, causing Atsuko to roll her eyes and say, "Right, sorry I asked! I forgot we were walking about Nodoka. 'Man among men' indeed!"

Genma made another low wuff, and Atsuko looked at him sourly and said, "Don't lecture me about honor, Gemi-chan! You had your chance to marry one of us, but you had to go and pick her, so don't give me this sob-story about your arranged marriage having the force of law because I happen to know that Happy was against it because he knew you'd let 'Doca lead you by the nose like the old ball and chain she is! I don't need to hear any excuses about why you felt you had to go and dump me, and don't pull the one about you trying to do right by all of us because if you'd had the guts to seriously challenge Comb here I doubt she'd have put up that much of a fight…"

"Hey!" Comb reacted.

"Of course marriage to her would have been a different rung of the lower hells, but let's not get into that right now," Atsuko continued as if oblivious to the slow burn and murderous glare she was receiving from her former rival, "Actually I kind of liked 'Doca in the old days, which is why I never ripped her fool head off or stuffed that katana of hers where the sun don't shine, but I just knew you were headed for trouble the minute you picked her over me…"

"And just who says he would have picked you?" Comb interrupted, then shot a nervous glance in the direction of her husband, who was presently chatting with Nodoka by the koi pond, which earned from her an even more acid expression.

"Well, isn't it obvious?" Atsuko smiled, "I was the only one of us with the guts to admit how I felt back then, and I got along with Happy, whose sort-of like a friend to my family, and I wouldn't have imposed on Genma's training trips with the Master, and I sure as hell wouldn't have forced him to swear to any oaths not of his choosing, and I certainly wouldn't have tried to rope him with those Amazon rules you swear by..."

"Oh really?" Comb eyed her former rival darkly, "What about all those charms, spells and potions you tried to use to win him over? The way that I remembered things you had no scruples at all about using whatever means you could to have your way with him. You even cast an illusion to make yourself look like Nodoka so you could sleep with him and have your Ryoga!"

"And what did any of that get me?" Atsuko snorted, "A cold bed with an illusion for a companion. Besides, I was trying to please my mother back then, remember? If I hadn't had the old witch breathing over my neck…"

"Tadaima!" a voice called out from the house.

Comb shot an alarmed look and said, "Son-in-law! He must be back, only he doesn't know about his mother…"

Genma started making frantic noises that Atsuko interpreted by saying, "Oh, that bad huh? Well, what are we waiting for? No way am I letting Nodoka do that to my Gemi-chan!"

Comb refrained from making further comments, but her private view was that things seemed to shaping up to be a near-repeat of the old days, which was truly a most alarming prospect…

"What the heck is wrong with you, Baka?" Ranma growled at Ryoga as the two of them came within sight of Shampoo and Nabiki, "Running off by yourself like that's no way to find Akane, and if you got off on one of your week-long trips to who-knows-where, that'd leave me to have to explain things to Pop and your mother!"

"I don't need a lecture from you, Ranma," Ryoga growled back, but with less than his usual enthusiasm, "I was just worried about Akane. You sure she'd head back for her place?"

"Where else she gonna go?" Ranma asked, "Besides, there's Shampoo, and you know she's good at this tracking stuff, my bet's on her waiting for us to show up before she'n Nabiki talk to Akane. I'd think you'd want to be there, too, 'cause she's gonna need cheering up, and for some reason she thinks you're the one who can do it."

"R-Really?" Ryoga swallowed, "Ah, I mean…sure, anyway I could help out…for Akane, that is…"

Ranma just rolled his eyes before smiling and waving at Nabiki, who smiled back as Shampoo gave a perky little smile his way. Once the four of them were together again, Ranma said, "So…how we gonna do this?"

"How do we approach Akane?" Nabiki sighed, "Leave that to me. She's my sister…"

"Shampoo apprentice," Shampoo reminded, "Maybe Shampoo be there talk sense to Akane."

"Talk sense?' Ryoga asked the Amazon, "How?"

Shampoo held up one of her bonbori and smiled, "Is moral encouragement, help convince Akane that we talk and she listen."

"I'd rather we not resort to physical violence if it can be avoided, Sham-chan," Nabiki replied, but added on the sly, "However…just in case she's being difficult, that might not be a bad idea to keep in backup."

"Oh yeah," Ranma chuckled in rueful irony, "A real effective deterrent, I know that by heart!"

Shampoo playfully stuck her tongue out at him, but her grin was an open promise of mischief to come, to which both Ranma and Nabiki swallowed.

"I'll talk to her," Ryoga said, "I think I'm in a good position to explain why some people need to keep secrets, and if she gets mad…she can hit me all she likes and I won't complain."

"You'd stand there and take it while she pounded you into pork-chops?" Ranma made a disgusted noise, "You're either in love or more stupid than I thought, Ryoga."

"Shut up, Ranma," Ryoga growled, "Some way to talk to your older brother."

"Hey, knock it off with this 'brother' stuff already!" Ranma growled, "Just 'cause Pop admitted to something for once doesn't mean I automatically believe him!"

Nabiki turned to Shampoo with a smirk, "Sound like brothers to me. What do you think, Sham-chan?"

"Is like listening to Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung, Shampoo sisters," Shampoo smiled brightly, "Is like what Shampoo father call Stereo, only Shampoo sisters no argue near this much."

"Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung?" Ranma looked at his purple haired iinazuke, "Sounds like a couple of circus clowns."

"You is half right, Ailen," Shampoo said without taking offense at the statement, "Shampoo sisters train like Beijing acrobats, perform like circus, only they study dangerous art of Chinese Dragon."

"Sounds interesting," Nabiki smiled, "I think we're gonna have to meet the rest of your family one of these days. Well…enough dawdling around. We might as well get this over with…"

And so, without any clue as to what was about to occur, the four of them advanced into the lion's den, like innocents lurking in the lair of a sleeping dragon…

Continued

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