Ai No Kusabi Fan Fiction ❯ Falling Into the Darkness ❯ Taking Over Me #1 ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: Ai No Kusabi belongs to its creators, both print (Rieko Yoshihara) and video (June). Many events are taken directly from the anime (a.k.a. spoilers!) without permission, for entertainment purposes only. Any other resemblance to the original is purely coincidental. Events that are completely in contrast to the original are a distinct possibility, as the original was not available for consultation. Inspired by song lyrics and music property of Evanescence.

Taking Over Me…Part 1

You don't remember me, but I remember you.

I lie awake and try so hard not to think of you.

But who can decide what they dream?

And dream I do…

Riki, where are you, luv? I think about you throughout most of my waking moments, even now. I kept hoping you'd be home with me soon, but I guess you found an opportunity to get out of Ceres that was too good for you to pass up. I would have thought you would have at least said goodbye to *me* before you left, but here I am…still waiting.

Do you remember how we met? I remember everything that ever happened between us. I especially remember how your eyes captured me when you first deigned to look in my direction. Such seriousness I found there, but when your cursory glance showed you that I was staring open-mouthed at you, you gave me the slightest smile and winked before moving on. I knew right then and there that I had to have you for my own. I know that was not exactly the case for you in the beginning, but I did whatever I could to win you over.

I had no illusions that it would be forever. No…that's a lie. I did dream that you'd always be with me, but I was always realistic enough to know that one day you'd find someone or something that drew you more than I did. Life is cruel like that, but we must take what is given, mustn't we? Even so, I was given you, and I'm not ready to give up completely, even now.

What is it about you that draws us all to you like insects to a light? I think it is not only your initial presence by itself, though your presence has always been so powerful that I think no man would be able to resist. I know that I certainly couldn't. Your gaze was only the first thing I noticed. Contrary to popular belief, I didn't notice that nice ass of yours until later…not much later, granted, but later just the same. The raw sensuality you portrayed in your stance, your swagger, your entire being, overrode my senses until I was naught but putty for you to mold as you saw fit. And Jupiter, how you molded me!

The first time you put me through my paces, I thought I would die from the commingling of pain and ecstasy. Your body conformed to mine in such a way that I doubt I shall ever find a more perfect fit. You filled me with your spirit every time you chose to take me to your bed, and I am grateful for the time we spent together. Even so, I miss you and want you back so badly my heart barely stands the strain sometimes.

I wish I didn't care so deeply for you, Riki. I try to slake my lusts with others, but none has ever come close to the joy I felt in your arms. I saw what we had as something that could profoundly change us both from mere slum-dogs in Ceres to something much more. I guess I was mistaken, however, because if you had felt the same way, you wouldn't have left at all. I hope whatever you left me for was worth it to you.

Did you find your way out of Ceres, then? No one ever mentioned seeing you anywhere. That means you either found your way out or you're dead, and while it might be selfish of me, I believe I would instinctively know if that were the case. We may be dead to you, but if you were ever to return to us, I would still be here waiting. No matter if I find contentment one day in another's arms, I will always belong to you, heart and soul. Without you, I am but a mere shadow of myself, but I do my best to keep moving on…to make you always proud of whom you caused me to be. Please come back to me…