Ai No Kusabi Fan Fiction ❯ Remember ❯ Iason Remembers Again ( Chapter 4 )

Chapter 4 - Iason Remembers again

 

I remember when Katze came to me with his suggestion for Riki's salvation.

 

“Fuck no, no, no ,no, no, no, almost any thing else but that!” My mind screamed as I pictured my little love in that son-of-a-bitch's bed, in his arms or I thought cruely, his arm. I wanted to throw up, to throw Katze out of my office, to throw him out my penthouse office window for suggesting such a thing. But, brave bastard that he was he persisted and I knew that what he was suggesting really was the way to save my darling boy, not a boy anymore but still, as if he really were dead, in my mind he would always be that impetuous, wild child I knocked out and threw nude into the arms of the man who stood before me now. The man I assigned to keep my most precious possession, my darling Riki, safe. He was determined to follow my orders despite my most vehement wishes against what he was proposing.

 

I didn't want to agree but I was seriously worried about Riki. He was losing weight at an alarming rate. No matter what Tai tempted him with, his appetite was non-existent. No matter if Tai prepared his favorite dishes, which he did almost every day to tempt the boy, Riki would only take a bite or two and then leave the table.

 

I confess there were spy cameras everywhere. I liked to see him in the shower, the water running in caressing rivulets down his lean golden body, his hair slicked tight to his beautiful head, framing his face in a black shiny streaking of silky wet hair. But after every meal even though the camera was aimed for the view of Riki in the shower I could tell by the very faint shadow on the wall, that my darling boy was in there throwing up what he had just eaten.

 

He didn't eat, he didn't sleep, he didn't rest during the day but paced until he was exhausted finally to collapse on his bed and weep for me. It had to stop, he was going to fall seriously ill if it didn't. I was helpless to stop him from destroying himself for love of me so I had to make a difficult decision. One I didn't want to make, one I wanted to say no to with all my heart but I couldn't make my darling suffer alone any more.

 

The only thing I could give him was the only thing I didn't want him to have but it would be good for him, I knew it would. Damn it, I gave my permission and Katze left to do his best to save my darling's life. I was sunk in misery about what was about to happen and at the same time, hope for Riki's happiness. When Katze turned and walked out the door of my office, he shut the door quietly but firmly so that I could cry without anyone knowing. It was something that I had never done before. How did he know that I would need the privacy of an empty room, lonely, and barren without my lover, to vent my pain. Even I didn't know it until that first tear ran down my cheek and fell to mark the spot where my heart lay beating heavily under my tunic. I stood looking out the penthouse window unable to see anything beyond my tears.

 

I remembered holding Riki in my arms so long ago and wept that they were empty now.