Angel Sanctuary Fan Fiction ❯ Random Pardies ❯ Breakfast, the return of Ira, and revenge of the cricket ( Chapter 4 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: The Parody Pair 
Anime/Manga: Angel Sanctuary Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 10.06.2005 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 153 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: Angel Sanctuary Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 10.06.2005 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 153 | Status: Completed
Once again, another random insane chapter! Once again, no plot or point, just random craziness off the top of our heads. Its also the result of complete boredom, and lack of lives. Today's inspiration: Cinnamon Krunchers Kellogg's cereal.
From the closest, a voice continued whining. ".....Heeeeelllloo? I'm huuuuunggrry!!!" At that moment, the disheveled pair (Rosiel and Katan) decide to enter. "You know, I'm hungry too. What's for breakfast?" Rosiel asked cheerfully. "What am I, your serving wench? Get your own damn breakfast!" Maddie said angrily. "...I'm going to eat the clothes in here soon if you don't let me out!!" Haley, not knowing that its a make-shift pantry as well, seeing as she is a complete retard, complained. Katan, also not having heard the cries for help goes to see what they have in the pantry/closet. He opens the door only to be attacked by the rabid fan girl. "I knew you loved me, BIRDYMAN!!" She squealed, clinging insanely. "No I don’t, I didn't even know you were in there!" "No, I'm the one who clings, he's MY Katan!" Rosiel yells, grabbing Katan's other arm. (insert tug of war between the two fan girls -er, I mean and Rosiel) "HE'S MY BIRDYMAN!!!" "HIS NAME'S NOT BIRDYMAN AND HE'S MINE!!!"
"Great, I'm stuck between and overprotective sex fiend, and a rabid fan girl/mental patient thing..." Poor Katan muttered. Meanwhile, Maddie not noticing the commotion, or actually not caring, is raiding the closet/pantry. "All we have to eat is Cinnamon Krunchers, and mini skirts, and I am NOT eating mini skirts." "I don't know, that cereal's pretty gross" Katan pointed out. "If you want to eat my mini skirt, we can do that tonight, for now just eat the cereal." Rosiel said. "I don’t want to do EITHER." Katan groaned. "Hey, we should put YOU in a mini skirt, BIRDYMAN!!!" (insert struggling scene to get mini skirt on Katan) "Great, now that I have one of your OBNOXIOUS MINI SKIRTS on, and you refuse to return my PANTS, I guess I have to stick with the mini skirt." Meanwhile, Katan trying to pull the miniskirt down so it doesn’t show too much. After that, the cricket chirps and appears again, giving Rosiel the finger and hopping away. "..I didn't even know crickets HAD fingers!" Rosiel exclaimed, as they sat down for breakfast. Poor Katan, sitting next to Rosiel, yelps as Rosiel starts pawing at his almost naked legs. Maddie looks under the table to see what the commotion is about and notices the pawing. "What, he has nice legs!!" Rosiel exclaimed, after he gets the accusing stares. Suddenly, Ira appears, dragging Tony the Tiger behind him. "You HAD to open the box of cereal, didn't you? You just HAD to open the cereal." Ira growls, as Tony the tiger is screaming "THEY'RE GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!!" Ira hits him over the head. "Well, excuse me, I didn't know that that tiger would follow you just 'cause we ate breakfast." Maddie said irritably. "Damn tiger, can smell the thing from a mile away...damn it, I don’t even eat cereal! I only drink blood...." He gives a predatory look at Katan. "And angel blood." Rosiel wraps his arm around Katan protectively, glaring at Ira all the while. Katan says, "Kill me, PLEASE." "Noooo, you love us" Rosiel said, nuzzling his neck. "Oh you just HAD to ruin it by ASKING for death, didn't you?" Ira said bitterly. And they proceed to eat the nasty cereal.(A/N even though I like it) "They're not nasty, they're GREEEEEEEEEEEEEAT!!" The tiger shouts. Even thought nobody said that within earshot of the tiger. "SHUT. THE FUCK. UP." Ira says, as he proceeds to bludgeon him over the head with one of the chairs. Haley has sneaked her hand under the back of Katan's skirt, and is feeling him in a "place", starting up another fight between herself and Rosiel. Meanwhile, Tony the tiger is laying dead on the ground with chair legs in his head. Maddie looks down at the tiger. "I hope its not illegal to kill tigers." "Who cares, its illegal for me to kill humans, and I've been doing it every night for the past 200 years!" Ira points out. "Plus, it's only illegal in areas where they actually HAVE tigers, not deranged cartoon tigers. Now that I've gotten rid of my life long enemy, I'm heading out to kill more stuff." But before Ira can leave, Haley grabs his hand and places it on Katan's ass. "....Why are you putting my hand on the guy's ass?" "Because its a nice ass, here, go ahead, squeeze it a little." At that, Ira yelped and takes his hand away. "I'm outta here, you freak!" And Ira disappears. "Well, at least there’s SOMEBODY in here who doesn’t want to grab my ass 24/7." And then suddenly Maddie realizes that she's the only one in this fanfic that hasn't grabbed his ass yet, except Tony the Tiger, but he doesn't count. (because we all know he wanted to) So, Maddie being sneakier than Haley, decides she’s going to try to outdo her, by totally deskirting him. Quickly, she takes a running leap at him, and knocks him to the ground and pulls his skirt off, along with his "panties". "....Why were you wearing panties?" Maddie asks. "...Rosiel made me." Katan mumbles, still face down on the floor. Haley adds, "Technically you still haven't grabbed his ass, you just deskirted him." "Oh, fine" Maddie says simply, proceeding with the groping. "Aw, you're so pretty when you're laying there all vulnerable like that." Rosiel says, as he bent over and licks his ass cheek. "UNWANTED PHYSICAL CONTACT....AGAIN" Katan yells. Haley was about to follow Rosiel's lead, when Maddie seized her and duct taped her to the bottom of the table, with Rosiel's help. "MY ass" Rosiel says, helping with the struggling psycho. "Well, technically, its HIS ass" Maddie pointed out once again. "WHATEVER" Rosiel says, rolling his eyes, as he grabs Katan and "does things" right there on the floor. "I'm getting the camera" Maddie said quickly, rushing off to find one. "Hey, somebody turn the table around, I can't see it!! PLEASE??!! ......heeeelllloooo? Come on, I'm missing good stuff!! HEEEELLLLOOOOOOO!!!!!" And Maddie, not being that much of a bitch, finally gets the camera and turns the table around. (A/N Ooo, sexy sounds!)
DAMN YOU TONY THE TIGER!!! *ahem* Anyway, thats the end of this chapter. A little strange, I know, but come on, you know you liked it. Just admit it! Come on, COME ON. Reviewyness, please!
From the closest, a voice continued whining. ".....Heeeeelllloo? I'm huuuuunggrry!!!" At that moment, the disheveled pair (Rosiel and Katan) decide to enter. "You know, I'm hungry too. What's for breakfast?" Rosiel asked cheerfully. "What am I, your serving wench? Get your own damn breakfast!" Maddie said angrily. "...I'm going to eat the clothes in here soon if you don't let me out!!" Haley, not knowing that its a make-shift pantry as well, seeing as she is a complete retard, complained. Katan, also not having heard the cries for help goes to see what they have in the pantry/closet. He opens the door only to be attacked by the rabid fan girl. "I knew you loved me, BIRDYMAN!!" She squealed, clinging insanely. "No I don’t, I didn't even know you were in there!" "No, I'm the one who clings, he's MY Katan!" Rosiel yells, grabbing Katan's other arm. (insert tug of war between the two fan girls -er, I mean and Rosiel) "HE'S MY BIRDYMAN!!!" "HIS NAME'S NOT BIRDYMAN AND HE'S MINE!!!"
"Great, I'm stuck between and overprotective sex fiend, and a rabid fan girl/mental patient thing..." Poor Katan muttered. Meanwhile, Maddie not noticing the commotion, or actually not caring, is raiding the closet/pantry. "All we have to eat is Cinnamon Krunchers, and mini skirts, and I am NOT eating mini skirts." "I don't know, that cereal's pretty gross" Katan pointed out. "If you want to eat my mini skirt, we can do that tonight, for now just eat the cereal." Rosiel said. "I don’t want to do EITHER." Katan groaned. "Hey, we should put YOU in a mini skirt, BIRDYMAN!!!" (insert struggling scene to get mini skirt on Katan) "Great, now that I have one of your OBNOXIOUS MINI SKIRTS on, and you refuse to return my PANTS, I guess I have to stick with the mini skirt." Meanwhile, Katan trying to pull the miniskirt down so it doesn’t show too much. After that, the cricket chirps and appears again, giving Rosiel the finger and hopping away. "..I didn't even know crickets HAD fingers!" Rosiel exclaimed, as they sat down for breakfast. Poor Katan, sitting next to Rosiel, yelps as Rosiel starts pawing at his almost naked legs. Maddie looks under the table to see what the commotion is about and notices the pawing. "What, he has nice legs!!" Rosiel exclaimed, after he gets the accusing stares. Suddenly, Ira appears, dragging Tony the Tiger behind him. "You HAD to open the box of cereal, didn't you? You just HAD to open the cereal." Ira growls, as Tony the tiger is screaming "THEY'RE GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!!" Ira hits him over the head. "Well, excuse me, I didn't know that that tiger would follow you just 'cause we ate breakfast." Maddie said irritably. "Damn tiger, can smell the thing from a mile away...damn it, I don’t even eat cereal! I only drink blood...." He gives a predatory look at Katan. "And angel blood." Rosiel wraps his arm around Katan protectively, glaring at Ira all the while. Katan says, "Kill me, PLEASE." "Noooo, you love us" Rosiel said, nuzzling his neck. "Oh you just HAD to ruin it by ASKING for death, didn't you?" Ira said bitterly. And they proceed to eat the nasty cereal.(A/N even though I like it) "They're not nasty, they're GREEEEEEEEEEEEEAT!!" The tiger shouts. Even thought nobody said that within earshot of the tiger. "SHUT. THE FUCK. UP." Ira says, as he proceeds to bludgeon him over the head with one of the chairs. Haley has sneaked her hand under the back of Katan's skirt, and is feeling him in a "place", starting up another fight between herself and Rosiel. Meanwhile, Tony the tiger is laying dead on the ground with chair legs in his head. Maddie looks down at the tiger. "I hope its not illegal to kill tigers." "Who cares, its illegal for me to kill humans, and I've been doing it every night for the past 200 years!" Ira points out. "Plus, it's only illegal in areas where they actually HAVE tigers, not deranged cartoon tigers. Now that I've gotten rid of my life long enemy, I'm heading out to kill more stuff." But before Ira can leave, Haley grabs his hand and places it on Katan's ass. "....Why are you putting my hand on the guy's ass?" "Because its a nice ass, here, go ahead, squeeze it a little." At that, Ira yelped and takes his hand away. "I'm outta here, you freak!" And Ira disappears. "Well, at least there’s SOMEBODY in here who doesn’t want to grab my ass 24/7." And then suddenly Maddie realizes that she's the only one in this fanfic that hasn't grabbed his ass yet, except Tony the Tiger, but he doesn't count. (because we all know he wanted to) So, Maddie being sneakier than Haley, decides she’s going to try to outdo her, by totally deskirting him. Quickly, she takes a running leap at him, and knocks him to the ground and pulls his skirt off, along with his "panties". "....Why were you wearing panties?" Maddie asks. "...Rosiel made me." Katan mumbles, still face down on the floor. Haley adds, "Technically you still haven't grabbed his ass, you just deskirted him." "Oh, fine" Maddie says simply, proceeding with the groping. "Aw, you're so pretty when you're laying there all vulnerable like that." Rosiel says, as he bent over and licks his ass cheek. "UNWANTED PHYSICAL CONTACT....AGAIN" Katan yells. Haley was about to follow Rosiel's lead, when Maddie seized her and duct taped her to the bottom of the table, with Rosiel's help. "MY ass" Rosiel says, helping with the struggling psycho. "Well, technically, its HIS ass" Maddie pointed out once again. "WHATEVER" Rosiel says, rolling his eyes, as he grabs Katan and "does things" right there on the floor. "I'm getting the camera" Maddie said quickly, rushing off to find one. "Hey, somebody turn the table around, I can't see it!! PLEASE??!! ......heeeelllloooo? Come on, I'm missing good stuff!! HEEEELLLLOOOOOOO!!!!!" And Maddie, not being that much of a bitch, finally gets the camera and turns the table around. (A/N Ooo, sexy sounds!)
DAMN YOU TONY THE TIGER!!! *ahem* Anyway, thats the end of this chapter. A little strange, I know, but come on, you know you liked it. Just admit it! Come on, COME ON. Reviewyness, please!