Artemis Fowl Fan Fiction ❯ Employee of the Month ❯ The Medieval Fool ( Chapter 7 )

The Medieval Fool

 

Dressed in the brightly striped, form fitting costume of a joker, Artemis strolled out of the changing room, hiding his troubled, not to mention embarrassed, feelings behind a mask of completely foolish joviality. He had just gotten his first job as a fool! Sure, it paid by the hour and was only at the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire, but he was confident it would lead to other, grander, things. After the people saw his juggling and unicycle act, they would be dying to have his perform elsewhere.

Never mind that he could only juggle about five objects, considering what they were. He had progressed to ten balls, but he had a harder time with heavier things, such as knives. So far, he could only juggle two. However, not everyone was able to juggle while riding on a unicycle, right? He could only hope so.

He had been hired as a last-minute job, after the people who ran the Faire had run out of other fools. His job was to act stupid, look stupid, tell stupid jokes, and somehow manage to make it all look brilliant. Artemis was confident. After all, Butler and Juliet had trained him on all the necessary tactics! He had, unfortunately, subconsciously decided to ignore the fact that they were bodyguards, not fools.

He walked past a group of young females, who were ooh-ing and aah-ing at a display of shiny `medieval' jewelry. Never mind that people back then were unlikely to be carrying around bottles of the glitter they were selling to eager tourists as `fairy dust.' He smirked and wandered toward the crowd of young women, who had now moved on to the stalls that sold `medieval food.' Namely, popcorn and funnel cake. He snorted, and decided to make his move.

Positioning himself directly behind his victim, he prepared himself mentally for his speech. And was surprised when the young woman in front of him spun around and crashed directly into his chest, sending them both flying to the ground, arms and legs tangled together. The girl moved to a new position, sitting on his chest, and suddenly realized her rather compromising position.

She quickly called to her boyfriend, who was about twice the size of Artemis, and ran to hid behind him. Sadly, Artemis had nowhere to run.

 

Disclaimer: Neither Tora nor I own Artemis Fowl and any characters or places associated with him. That belongs to Eoin Colfer.

 

TEGC: I got a review, which reminded me that we did not have any disclaimers! I was just, like, oops! Therefore, now I have a disclaimer. Thanks you to whomever it was that told me. Sadly, I just forgot who it was, but, thanks!