Beyblade Fan Fiction ❯ Endure ❯ Meant To Live ( Chapter 5 )

Authoress' Notes:  To start with, I'd like to thank all my wonderful reviewers who have continuously been reviewing this fic and being so patient with me with the slow updating. I can't believe you all like this fic so much! I'm not even that fond of it. *shrugs* Also, to the anonymous reviewer, kaisluvr69, thank you for R/R-ing but stop pestering me for updates! *scowls* That just pisses me off and I tend to take longer to update because of it. So cut it out. Now, to move on, I've discovered that this fic is very much going to be one of those angsty romances. That wasn't my original intent, but it's sure turning out that way. *sweatdrops* I don't write humour very well, so a comedic romance is rather hard for me to put out. I'll have to work on that.

 

Warnings:        Yaoi, adult language, angst, & probable lemons.  Specific warnings will be given each chapter if relevant.

 

Disclaimer:       I do not own Beyblade, its characters, or anything else to do with it.  I do not own any of the songs from which I borrowed to make chapter titles. They belong to whomever they belong to (which isn't me!). I own only the OCs that will appear in this fic.

 

Pairings:        & nbsp; TyKa, Rei / Mariah, Max / ?, Kenny/Hilary, Tala / ?, others TBA.

 

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Chapter 05: Meant To Live

 

Kai woke up first the next morning - early, as he usually did. Though…it was more out of trained habit than any need or desire to get up. Still, he blinked the sleepy grit out of his eyes and looked around briefly in confusion. He gave a yawn, then smiled as he noticed the weight on the bed next to him, curled up against his side and still grasping his hand from the night before.

His fond smile turned slowly into a frown of concern as he remembered what had brought him to be in bed with Tyson in the first place. Not that he was complaining, of course, but it was the circumstances that put him there that he had reason to complain about. What could have happened to you to put you into such a depression? And why do you cling to me like you'd die if I wasn't here?

Somehow managing to slip his hand free, Kai sat up, studying the sleeping face of his dragon hidden partially by the midnight blue locks of his hair draping over it. Even in his sleep, Tyson had lines here and there around his eyes, brow, and mouth, and there were dark circles under his eyes - all of which indicated stress and lots of it. It made Kai's chest constrict and his heart hurt to see the happy, carefree, un-suppressible spirit of this youth he'd fallen so hard for so obviously suffering.

Well, I have the chance to sort it all out, don't I? And maybe this time, it will be me who is there for you, just as you've always been for me. Kai brushed the hair out of Tyson's face and rolled off the bed to his feet, then pulled the blanket back over the sleeping teen so he didn't catch a chill. As if there was a magnet in Tyson that drew the older teen to him, Kai leaned down and tentatively brushed his mouth across Tyson's closed eyelids, then lightly touched his lips to Tyson's. Eyes widened as a thrilling shiver ran through him, and he hastily backed away from the bed before he turned to leave the room.

Out in the kitchen, he went through the motions of making coffee, trying to slow his speeding pulse and calm his heavy breathing. Gripping the counter, Kai closed his eyes and cursed his apparent inability to resist the temptation Tyson seemed to present him with - without even knowing or trying. How one simple little touch - even an intimate one that had been barely a kiss - could affect him so deeply, right to the core, was beyond Kai. But it happened, and here I am, standing in the kitchen flustered and… He put a hand to his cheek and shuddered. Yep. He was blushing wildly. Gods, I am so glad Tyson isn't awake to see me like this.

Pouring himself a mug of freshly brewed coffee, he left the kitchen, intending to go out on the balcony. However, a knock at the door made him turn and go to answer it instead.

“Good morning, Kai!” Max and Rei stood there on the threshold and the blonde held up a box of donuts - at least that's what the box said. “We figured you guys would be starved, so when we went out looking for our own breakfast…”

“We picked up you and Tyson something, too.” Rei finished. “Muffins and donuts.”

Kai stared at the box for a moment in surprise, then reached out and accepted the gift. “Uh, wow, guys. Thank you.”

“No problem! I know Tyson will probably want to eat when he gets up, before you guys go grocery shopping.” Max stuffed his hands in his pockets, still smiling. “Oh! I'm gonna go see if Kenny and Hilary are up yet. See ya later, Kai!”

The dual-haired teen shook his head as the blonde danced down the hall to their friends' door. Rei turned back to Kai and studied the former captain critically.

“You know, Kai, last night I didn't really get a chance to talk to you.” He said after a moment. Kai raised an eyebrow at him.

“About what?”

“Well, other than the obvious question of where you've been all this time, I have to say…you seem…different somehow.” The raven-haired blader leaned against the door frame, crossing his arms. “It's like you're lighter or something. Open…”

Kai shrugged carelessly. He understood what Rei was trying to get at, and he knew the reason for it, too.

It was because he felt free.

“I'm no different than before, Rei.” He said quietly. “I'm just…more than I was.”

Golden, feline shaped eyes widened in some small understanding. “Well, it's good to have you back around again. You were missed.”

Kai caught the quick darting of his eyes to Tyson's closed bedroom door behind him at that admission, wondering once again just what was going on with his roommate and why everyone seemed to think he was the solution. Scowling to himself, he straightened and glanced over his shoulder.

“Hn. I should go. My coffee's getting cold.” Okay, so he still wasn't very good at diplomatically getting rid of people. Rei smiled, though, and backed out of the door, not offended.

“Sure. Enjoy the muffins and donuts. See you guys later.” He walked off down the hall and Kai closed the door. He put the box on the counter in the kitchen, and picked up his mug again. Sipping and discovering his coffee had gone lukewarm, he went to the microwave and put the mug in to warm it up.

The opening of a door drew his attention around while he was waiting. Tyson stood in the doorway of his bedroom, his hair loose and wild from sleep, and his eyes huge and vulnerable. He was looking around the room desperately, as if searching for something. Kai moved around the counter in concern.

“Tyson? Hey…what's wrong?” He questioned, walking over to the bluenette. Tyson's gaze snapped to Kai and the sound of his voice, locking onto him.

“Kai!” He nearly sobbed the older teen's name. In his voice, Kai could hear the relief and pure emotion that seemed to hold Tyson in its grip. “You…you're really here?” Tyson reached out and touched his fingers lightly to Kai's cheek, as if he was afraid Kai wouldn't be there or he was seeing things. The phoenix stood still, doing his best to ignore the thrill of Tyson's touch, and concentrated on trying to calm Tyson down.

“Yes, of course I am.” Kai assured him in a steady voice, reaching up to hold Tyson's hand to his cheek. “See? Don't you remember the party last night?”

Tyson sucked in a shuddering breath and closed his eyes, fighting off his panic attack and sighing in relief - only to have it replaced by embarrassment. He pulled his hand back, slowly, and Kai released it. “Yeah.” He answered, hugging himself in shame. “I remember…I just…woke up thinking I'd dreamed it and…sorry, Kai. I'm okay.” He backed away from his former captain, unable to meet his eyes. “Um, is that coffee I smell?”

Kai frowned but didn't move to stop Tyson from moving away. “It is. Why don't I get you a cup and then you and I can talk?” He turned without waiting for an answer and went back to the kitchen to get his own mug and some for his shaken dragon. “Have a seat in the living room, Kinomiya.”

Obediently (and taking the opportunity to compose himself), Tyson sank down onto the sofa and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to put some order to the wild locks again. He felt like an idiot, freaking out like that over Kai. What the heck is wrong with me, anyway? He's going to think I've gone crazy or something.

Kai appeared a moment later and placed a steaming mug of coffee on the coffee table in front of Tyson, as well as a brown box with donuts all over it. “Max and Rei dropped these off for us. You should eat something.”

Eager for the distraction, Tyson opened the box and his eyes lit up a little. “Muffins! This one looks good.” He slipped off the couch to the floor, sitting up to the coffee table and taking a muffin. Kai watched him, still frowning a little, though eased somewhat to see Tyson eat. “So, Kai…what'd you want to talk about?” The bluenette asked, pulling apart his chocolate chip muffin to eat in smaller bites.

Kai sipped his own coffee. “Well…I want to know how you are. You were more than a little upset with me last night.”

“Was I?” Tyson asked, as casually as possible, pausing in breaking off another piece of muffin.

Kai raised an eyebrow at him. “Don't try that on me, Kinomiya. You know what I'm talking about.”

Any appetite he had disappeared. Tyson sighed and pushed the rest of his muffin aside. “Look. I was exhausted, and a little emotional after all the reunions and stuff. And I was…am a little mad at you for not keeping in touch. I probably took it all out on you, and I'm sorry.”

The older blader put down his mug with a `click,' and ran a hand through his hair. “No. You have every right to be mad at me, Tyson. I'm the one who should be apologizing. I have a good reason for not keeping in touch, but even so…”

“And what might that be?” Tyson wondered, his voice doubtful and scathing. Kai flinched and clasped his hands together in front of himself, leaning forward on his forearms on his knees.

“It's a long story, and I'll tell you everything. But…I don't want it to be general knowledge.”

The younger teen nodded. “I'm not a gossip, Kai. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. I just want to know where you were and why you never emailed or called or anything.” He said earnestly. Because had I known, I could have at least talked to you when…I lost Gramps.

“No. I want you to know.” Kai stared at his hands, blushing a bit. “I trust you.”

Tyson blinked at him, surprised. He didn't know what to say to that. “Okay.” He finally managed. “So what happened?”

Kai got up, filled with a restless energy as his memories surfaced once more. Walking to the window to stare outside, he crossed his arms over his chest. “Where to start? Everything's just been so…” He shook his head and sighed deeply.

Tyson frowned, for the first time thinking that maybe Kai had been going through things of his own. It hadn't occurred to him before - though it probably should have since he was probably the one who knew Kai best. It made him feel a little ashamed and a little guilty for being selfish. In a quiet, subdued voice, he suggested, “Why not start with where you went when you left?”

“You remember I was going to that private school before Ozuma and his team came looking for us?”

“Yeah. The one you attended with Wyatt.”

“I had to go back there after the Worlds.” Kai glanced back over his shoulder with a small smile that held a hint of his defiant personality. “I sort of left without permission…and without telling anyone.”

The bluenette covered his mouth to stifle a laugh. “I'm not surprised.”

Kai smiled, turning back to the window. “Yeah. I've never been one for following other people's expectations.”

“You have yet to disappoint me.” Tyson said. Kai blinked and looked back at him, surprised, and the younger blader flushed. “What? I learned almost immediately not to pin expectations on you.” He looked away, embarrassed. “I wanted to…be your friend and if I tried to treat you like someone you're not, I knew you'd never want to be friends.”

Walking over to the couch, Kai sat down heavily on it next to Tyson, stunned. “I had no idea you had such insight into me, Tyson. But…” he paused, staring at his hands again. “I'm grateful to you. For everything. If…if it hadn't been for you, my life may have gone down a path that would have destroyed me. So…thanks.”

With both of them facing the same direction, neither saw the other blush fiercely.

“You're welcome.” Tyson replied. Wanting to move out of the mushy, emotional, confessional moment as soon as possible, he coughed a bit to clear his thick throat. “So what happened after you went back?”

Silently thanking his former team mate for the change in conversation, Kai ran a hand through his hair. “Well, when I got back I had to face the firing squad of my teachers, my dorm supervisor, and the headmaster. I'd rather have dealt with just them, but I'm not that lucky.”

Tyson heard his voice sober drastically, any hint of his formerly happy tone disappearing as if it had never been there. “What happened?”

“Standard procedure when a student disappears without permission or telling anyone - they call the parents or guardians.” Kai stared ahead blankly. “Voltaire came and took me away again - partially because he was furious with me for various reasons, and partly because the school didn't want me there any longer.”

“They kicked you out?” Tyson exclaimed incredulously.

“Oh yeah. You betcha.” Kai, of course, couldn't hide the note of pride in his voice. Tyson shook his head.

“Only you would see that as a good thing.” He snickered a little and earned a swat on the shoulder. “Sorry. It's just funny.” Tyson turned around so he could look up at Kai while he listened. “Go on…”

“Well, Voltaire took me back to the Hiwatari mansion here in Japan. I guess he didn't want me in Russia right away. I lived there for a little more than a year - without Voltaire. He was so furious with me that he wanted absolutely nothing to do with me, and he left me in Japan under the care of the household staff.” Kai shrugged. “That was just fine with me. I didn't want anything to do with him either. Only problem was that I was confined to the house and grounds, and I wasn't allowed to contact anyone outside the house. The staff watched my every move, listened to every word I said, and reported it all back to Voltaire. I tried though.” He ran both hands through his hair and slouched back against the sofa. “I managed to actually dial your phone number once, but before I got an answer one of the maids found me with the phone in my hand.”

Tyson's eyes were wide as saucers. “Oh, Kai…I'm sorry. I didn't realize…I've been so mad about your lack of contact and I should have known you'd have a good reason for it. I am so sorry!” The bluenette sat up on his knees earnestly, laying a hand on Kai's knee.

“It's okay, Tyson.” The phoenix tried to reassure him, seeing the guilt in the younger man's eyes. “How could you know? I know I don't normally make an effort to…socialize, but you couldn't know I just wasn't able to get in touch. Stop beating yourself up for it.”

“But…” Tyson snapped his mouth shut at Kai's stern gaze. “Okay.”

“Good. So, to continue, I was stuck at the mansion alone, basically. Then one day Voltaire phoned and I was ordered to pack up because he was bringing me back to Russia.” Kai stared straight ahead as he spoke. This was the part of the story he wished he could just forget.

“Why? Out of the blue like that…”

“I will never really know, truthfully. I got there and I was so afraid he was going to plant me back in the Abbey - which he had reopened, by the way.” Tyson gasped and settled back down, though he didn't even notice his hand was still on Kai's knee. “Yeah. I was rather shocked, too, when I found out. Anyway, he didn't send me back there - or at least he never had the chance. Instead, I got stuck with a tutor to keep up with my studies.” Kai paused. “Actually, make that several tutors. Voltaire wouldn't keep them around for very long - two, three months at most. By the third one, I realized he switched them often enough that they wouldn't have enough time to get to know me or to like me. If they had had time, you see, then one of them may have tried to `help' me or something, and for Voltaire, that just wouldn't do.”

Tyson made sympathetic noises, the older blader's bitter tone tugging on his heart strings some more. “That man was a supreme ass, wasn't he?”

“Something like that, yeah.” Kai agreed, smiling a little at the comment. “Things just kept going downhill from there, though. I guess Wyatt's family finally moved past the first stage of their grief and onto the next - anger and a desire for revenge.”

The bluenette's eyes widened. “I don't understand. You had nothing to do with Wyatt's death. It was that cyber bit-beast's fault. Why would they…?”

“They blamed it all on me.” Kai's chest felt tight with the grief and guilt he knew he'd never be able to fully dispel. “Wyatt was obsessed with me - with blading against me. If I hadn't been so arrogant, they said, and just shown him a few things then he'd never have joined up with those `bad people' or gotten involved with cyber bit-beasts. So they blamed me, and decided to sue not just me, but the school, too - because they allowed blading on campus and because they allowed Wyatt to leave the premises to go chasing after me in the first place.”

“Oh, Kai…” Tyson wished he could do something to help Kai get past the pain and bitter regret that he could see quite clearly on his friend's face. Like Kai doesn't have enough on his conscious with Wyatt's death and the battle with Team Psykick as it is. Then his family comes along and adds to the guilt and pain Kai already puts on himself for the whole incident.

“Needless to say, Voltaire was raging furious. And I mean raging bull in a china shop furious.” The phoenix continued. He winced at the memories. “It was the last straw for him and he ordered me to get packed up one day, because I was going back to the Abbey and out of his sight for good.” Kai shuddered violently, feeling as if someone had just doused him in ice-cold water.

“What is it, Kai?” Tyson frowned deeply in concern when the phoenix went very pale and seemed to tremble. He reached for Kai's hands, finding them cold and clammy, and took one between his own to rub warmth back into him. “What happened?”

“I remember…it was raining. A thick, muggy downpour. I remember going out to the car, and getting in next to Voltaire as the driver held open the door for us. And I remember the faint smell of vodka from the driver, though I wasn't really paying attention at the time. I was more concerned with figuring out how I was going to get the hell out of the Abbey the second Voltaire and Boris weren't looking.” Kai gripped Tyson's hand almost desperately, unconsciously seeking comfort from the bluenette - his lifeline. “Maybe if I had…well, maybes and what ifs aren't going to change anything.”

“The driver drove under the influence?” Tyson guessed, horrified. “My god.” He had a sneaking suspicion he knew what came next.

“I don't remember much after I got in. I was lost in my own thoughts, and Voltaire wasn't talking to me at all by this time. All I do remember is…screaming metal and people and sirens, strange lights flashing, and pain unlike anything I'd ever felt before. It's all very hazy and I don't think I ever want to remember those times anyway. All I know is I woke up in a hospital a month and a half later, in traction. Both my legs were broken, several ribs were busted, my left arm was broken in two places, and…my hands…” Kai's voice went so soft Tyson had to lean closer to hear him properly. The crimson-eyed teen took his hands from Tyson's and held them out so he could see the horrific mess of scars that decorated both appendages across their backs and over his palms. Some even stretched and zigzagged up to Kai's elbows.

Tyson felt tears stream down his cheeks and he said Kai's name in a hoarse voice that shook with emotion. “Kai…”

“When they told me…I might never regain full use of my hands, that I might never be able to…blade again…” Kai nearly choked on the words, even now. “God, I freaked out. I…they had to sedate me to keep me from injuring myself more. If it hadn't been for Mr. Dickenson, I may not have lived much longer.” That was painful to admit. Kai - the strong one, the seemingly invincible, irrepressible phoenix - had contemplated death at the very idea that there was a chance he wouldn't be able to blade again. Tyson made a strangled noise as he swallowed back a sob, and was up off the floor and sitting down beside his former captain in a flash, one arm hugging Kai to his side.

“Okay. Shh…take a few deep, slow breaths, Kai.” Tyson rubbed his back in circles, sniffing a bit and watching his phoenix shake and take shuddering breaths. “Let's just…take a break and we'll talk some more in a bit, okay?”

Kai nodded, putting his face in his hands and trying to get a hold of himself. Damn, did he feel like a pathetic moron. He was getting all worked up over a possibility he knew wasn't going to happen and hadn't. After all, he'd already held his launcher and spun his blade to take down the Abbey. Not to mention the months of physical therapy and his own intense training regime - with a little help from Tala and his team before Bryan, Ian, and Spencer had gone to their new lives. Then Tala had been his opponent across the dish until they'd come here, to the university.

The Demolition Boys, however, had no idea just how badly injured he'd been or that they'd been helping him re-train. Lucky for him, thanks to the display of power he'd shown at the Abbey that day, Kai hadn't been questioned about it even once by any of them. They didn't realize how weak he had truly become.

“Feeling better?” Tyson asked, breaking him out of his reverie. At that point he noticed the bluenette was still rubbing his back and emoting concern and care. But it was the touch that was making his spine tingle and his breathing hitch again.

“Yeah.” The crimson-eyed blader managed to say before he had to pause and clear his throat. “I'm fine. Ah…I could use a glass of water, though.”

“Water?” Tyson stood up in a hurry, eager to help him. “Sure! Just…sit here a minute and I'll get you some.” He hurried off to the kitchen. By the time he came back, handing Kai the glass, Kai had composed himself again.

Sipping slowly, Kai sighed deeply and attempted to apologize for his weakness. “Sorry about that. I…”

“Don't you dare apologize.”

Kai's gaze snapped to Tyson's, meeting it in stunned surprise at the harsh tone. “What?”

“Do not apologize to me for being human.” Tyson stood up and walked over to the kitchen, leaning against the island counter with clenched fists. For some, inexplicable reason, he was irritated and infuriated that Kai felt he would have to apologize for his emotions, even though Tyson knew he would. It was just the way Kai was, and Tyson knew it. “God, Kai! After all these years, and after all we've been through…don't you think I know you well enough and that you can trust me? You don't have to…you can be yourself with me.”

Blinking in shock at this outburst, Kai stood up, too, and crossed over to stand next to the bluenette. “I wasn't. I mean, not for that, Tyson…” he reached out to put his hand on Tyson's shoulder, but stopped, hovering there for a split second before he retracted it and shoved his hands behind his back instead. “I…was apologizing for freaking out over something so irrational. I know I will blade again and that I'm recovering, and yet I…” He stopped and ran his hands through his hair again with a growl of frustration.

“Maybe not. But that's human, too, and I don't want you telling me you're sorry for it.” Tyson stated, his voice still firm, yet it had softened slightly. He never could stay mad at his phoenix for long.

“Fine.” Kai faced him again. “I can only say I'll try, Tyson. I can't make promises.”

“That's enough for me.” Tyson looked into his eyes, his own full of sincerity. “I will never ask for anything more from you.”

“I know.”

There was a moment of complete understanding between them. Followed swiftly by a moment of awkwardness. Turning an interesting shade of red as they stared at each other, Tyson coughed into his hand and shuffled his feet.

“Ah…I'm going to go have a shower and get dressed. I think we should go buy groceries and stuff, don't you?” He asked.

“Uh, yeah.” Kai grabbed onto that exit from the painfully awkward moment with both hands. “Good idea. But…don't you want to hear the rest?”

“Of course. There's plenty of time for it, Kai.” Tyson said, smiling a little. It wasn't the same smile that Kai remembered, but there was a glimmer of that in it. “We…could use a break, that's all.”

“Alright.” Kai watched him go into his bedroom and close the door, knowing - somehow - that he'd been forgiven without being told. And he felt lighter and more free than he'd ever felt before because of it.

Maybe things would be okay after all between himself and his dragon.

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Authoress' Notes: I had to cut it short here because it was just getting too long and I was getting sick of typing. *sheepish grin* So now Tyson (and all of you readers) know what happened to Kai - mostly. But I guess the question remains…what about Tyson? Uh…actually, don't get all excited about some big plot twist or anything, because there isn't one, really. However, stay tuned for more! Finding out stuff is always good reading, right? Please R/R!!!!