Beyblade Fan Fiction ❯ How we came to be ❯ I hate not knowing ( Chapter 14 )

Faith POV

 

“I mean it Kai, you jump, I jump.”

Didn't he understand? I need him. Alive. But he's so stuck in his own reasoning that he doesn't see what's right in front of him. Well if he won't take my word, I'll need to prove it.

I close my eyes and take one step backwards. My heel is already over the floor. Fear is taking over my body but I will against it. I can't be scared now.

 

Then I feel a tug on my arms and gravity taking hold of me. I open my eyes just to see Kai and me falling forward. I land on top of him and I feel relieved. He finally got it. My heart and soul are swimming around in joy, a feeling I haven't felt in ages, not in this magnitude anyway. I see him looking at me and I feel a blush creeping towards my cheeks. He has never looked at me like that before. Why is he looking at me like that?

 

But my mind shuts up as he closes the distance and I feel his lips on mine. He's kissing me. He's kissing me, oh my god he's kissing me! And I'm doing nothing, I'm just sitting there. And then my reflexes kick in. I close my eyes and kiss back. He's so soft, so gentle and yet so desperate. But just as I start to kiss back he pulls away and looks at me scared. The same scared look he gave me after the fight.

 

I feel my face change into a confused look. I don't understand. What was wrong?

“I'm sorry.”

Sorry? Sorry for what? For kissing me? How could he be sorry for that? I thought he loved me. And then my common sense painfully reminds me that I don't even know if he said it. Pain fills my heart and I stare at the ground. Maybe he never did say it, maybe he doesn't love me after all, and he just wants to keep things as they were before. I understand. Hey, he's got hundreds of girls lying at his feet. Silly me, thinking that he could care for me more than a friend. Silly, silly Faith.

 

He grabs my arms and looks in my eyes. God, I hope he can't see the watery look. But I see him looking at me full of grief. What is he so sad about?

 

Normal POV

 

It was only after Faith kissed him back that Kai fully realised what he was doing, and that he shouldn't be doing it. He didn't have the right to do so.

He pulls away and his heart breaks at the confusing look she sends his way. Oh how he wished that he could do something to take that look away. But he had made the promise of never hurting her again. He couldn't kill himself, not after she had told him that she needed him. She nearly died to prove that to him. But he wouldn't go any closer than friends. It would all go back to the way it was. At least that's what he told himself to soothe the ache that had nested deep in his soul. Not that it helped

 

He sees her look sadden as she seems to understand. His heart breaks even further. He realises that by trying to protect her from harm he had only hurt her more. He sighs and grabs her arms. It wasn't because he didn't want her. He'd be lying if he said he didn't, but he couldn't have her. He gently forces her to look in his eyes. He sees the disappointment and sadness in there and feels like hitting himself for hurting her.

“You deserve so much more than me.”

She shakes her head and she lunges forward to kiss him again. Before he can stop it he leans into it. But then he pushes her back again.

 

“No, please no Faith. I don't deserve you; I'll never deserve you, not after what I've done to you. Promise me you'll become happy with someone else and only think of me as a friend. I can't make you happy, the only thing I've ever done is make you sad.”

His determined look makes her agree. Even though she felt like ripping someone's throat. How could he think that he didn't deserve her? How?

He lets her go and offers a hand to help her up and puts one of her arms around his shoulders to help her once he notices that she wasn't entirely fit yet.

“We have to forget this ever happened…no one can ever know about this.”

She nods, though she knew full well that she would never be able to forget this. They descend the stairs, back to her room, where they see Ray with two fistfuls of sheet and softly crying.

 

“Hey Ray, who died?”

Faith asked as Kai places her on the chair. The look on Ray's face was priceless. Disbelief shone through his entire face as he looks at her through his tears. He then goes towards her and pulls her into a hug.

“Oh god Faith, you're awake. You're alive. I thought you were dead. I came here and you were gone, I thought you were. I didn't want to believe it. When did you wake up?”

“I don't know, I wasn't exactly looking at the clock. I was wandering around when Kai found me and brought me back here.”

 

Then Ray realised Kai was standing right next to the chair. He quickly straightens up and looks half pissed, half happy. He comes within an inch of Kai's face and for the first time Kai fears the look in his face. He can't help but cower a little.

“You, don't you EVER do that to me again. You nearly gave me a heart attack man. Don't you ever, ever write shit like that again.”

And then he pulled the Russian into a bear hug. He was relieved that he hadn't lost two of his friends. That they were still alive and healthy. Kai peals the way too happy Ray away from him.

“I'm going to get a doctor, Ray; can you put Faith into the bed again? She's still a little cold.”

 

Without ever waiting for permission Ray grabbed the girl and put her in the hospital bed gently. He couldn't care less if she smacked him, he was just happy to have her back. But she didn't seem too happy. He had seen that same hint of sadness in Kai's eyes. As he was pulling up her covers he asked her.

“Faith, is everything alright?”

Obviously distracted she looked up at Ray surprised and then quickly put a smile on her face.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine, just a little out of it. How long was I asleep anyway?”

He could see that something was amiss, not because her smile looked fake, but just because of the sake that she was smiling. Something happened between her and Kai, he was sure of it.

 

“If you ever want to talk about it, Faith, I'm always there for you, you know that right?”

She nodded and then repeated the question of how long she had been asleep.

“About a week I think. You weren't just sleeping, you were in a coma. We nearly lost you.”

She sees his face sadden again, his eyes just a little red from the crying he had done before they came back.

“What do you mean you almost lost me?”

“You had a heart attack the first night. If the nurses hadn't gotten here so soon you would've died. I don't know what I would've done if they had been too late.”

“You and me both” came a voice from behind him. Kai had returned with the doctor. He checked her up and asked standard questions like do you feel this, follow my finger… except for one thing.

 

“Do you know anything about your near death experience? It would be nice if you did, some unanswered questions answered, you know. What is there beyond the veil? Is there really a white light at the end of the tunnel?”

She thought about what she had seen when she was in a coma. And she realised that if she ever told anyone they'd think she was ready for the nuthouse, she even thought she was ready for one when she remembered it all. She shook her head, but Kai could see that she was hiding something. He was the only one who could see anything in her eyes of course. Ray had a feeling she was, but not about the `behind the veil' thing.

“Ah, too bad. I guess we'll all have to wait till death comes for us to know. Well Miss Faith, you seem to be in order. No visible consequences from heart attack or coma. Impressive but I'd like to keep you here for another day though, just to make sure that you're 100% alright.”

 

Her eyes widened.

“No way, last time you said that I was here for a week. I'm not going to spend another minute in this hospital.”

And she stepped out of the bed, only to fall forward. She had underestimated the strength of her legs again. She didn't fall on the floor though, but straight into the rescuing arms of Kai Hiwatari. Before she had even fully fallen into him she pushed herself up, fighting against the tears that felt like coming again. He didn't want her, so she wouldn't make it any harder for either of them. Both of them tried their hardest to ignore the warm fuzzy feeling they got when they touched. The doctor sighed as he saw her fall. There was no way that he was going to be able to convince the girl to stay, even if it was only to regain her strength. So he signed the release papers on one condition.

 

“Alright, but you are not walking out of here, at least not for the next two days. And if you refuse the wheelchair then I'll make sure that you come here at least once a day for check up.”

She paled and grudgingly agreed to be seated in the wheelchair. Cursing it to hell and back again as a lot of people stared at them. As they exited the doors she made a move to stand when she felt 2 pairs of hands push her back down.

“I can walk you know…I'm not a cripple.”

“You heard what the doctor said. No walking for two days, he said you're not strong enough yet. Besides, why not enjoy the rare moment you'll have 5 guys waiting you on hand and foot?”

She glared at Ray; she definitely didn't want that happening. She could take care of herself, and hated being treated like she was helpless.

So when Ray opened the door and helped her out of the chair she slapped him hard and smirked as he touched his cheek gingerly.

“Still think I'm not strong enough?”

 

Kai grinned when he heard the slap. But he took the wheelchair quickly and put it in the trunk. He knew better than to treat her like she was some china doll and Ray will learn it the hard way. He could just tell him of course…but this way was much more fun. She was batting away at Ray's hands when Kai's face emerged from the trunk again. She didn't look to happy.

“Ray, I swear I'm going to break your hands if you don't STOP helping me. I'm fine!”

Her look quickly changed as Kai poked his head in the car next to Ray's.

“He's only executing the doctor's order you know. You could be a little nicer to him at least.”

 

She felt like she had been burned by a hot iron. This was the first time Kai had ever used that tone against her. That cold, reprimanding and mocking tone. Before her heart welled up again she crossed her arms and put her head down. She felt like throwing up. Kai hadn't missed the puppy look and he stopped himself before he apologized. He had to do this, otherwise she'd never get the fact that there were other guys that liked her. He hated having to be mean to her, but if it was the only way, it was the only way.

In the meanwhile Ray frowned at Kai. Had he just pointed the finger at Faith? No, couldn't be, he hadn't heard right. Then he saw the look on Faith's face just before she looked down. He had heart right.

 

He closed the door and felt Kai's forehead. The slate-haired jerked away.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Checking if you didn't have a fever.”

“What for?”

Ray sighed. There was definitely something wrong between those two.

“Never mind. This is one of those `ask me and I'll slap you'- situation again is it? No thank you, I already had one.”

He touched his cheek as to prove his point. It was already starting to swell and her handprint was very visible on it.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You're giving Faith the cold shoulder dude; I mean you just defended me against her. You never do that. What happened?”

 

“Nothing happened. And shouldn't you be happy? She's yours now; I won't be there between you and her anymore.”

Without another word he opened the door and slammed it shut.

“Owkey…this is not going to be a fun ride.”

He groaned and stepped in the door. He really wished he could have some distraction right now, but he didn't dare to turn on music. Kai seemed too pissed off for a happy tune, and Faith too depressed or moping. Oh how he loved to sit in the middle of the situation and be the innocent victim.

…noooooooooooooot

 

 

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<groans> Please flame me, this chappy sucks big time, don't it?

 

General: Change of Name. This one fits the content better in my opinion.

srry for the slooooooooooooow updating, but I feel like my imagination has fried ever since those damn observation lessons.

 

 

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