Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction / Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ The Glass House ❯ The Pilot. ( Prologue )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: PikaFlash 
Watch the pilot episode and give comments.
Anime/Manga: Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction / Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 03.20.2002 | Pages: 18 | Words: 7.0K | Visits: 556 | Status: Completed
Watch the pilot episode and give comments.
Anime/Manga: Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction / Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 03.20.2002 | Pages: 18 | Words: 7.0K | Visits: 556 | Status: Completed
*Announcement*
President Ken is wanting to be on the radio.
Tai Yagami wishes to be paid US$2, 000, 000 for the information to be given to the Digicrats.
*Tai Ads: The Glass House: Exposed*
Ash, Tai and Sakura were in an interview room.
Tai: We've planned a lot for our pilot episode a lot.
~
Tai: FOOD FIGHT!!!
Tai and Sakura tossed food at each other while Ash eats a cake.
~
Sakura: All of us get along with each other.
~
Ash was writing "Sakura is a Bi" on the white board until he saw Sakura outside the meeting
room, Ash quickly rubbed off the words.
~
Ash: We have fair competition.
~
Ash was next to Sakura at the microphone.
Ash: THAT'S IT! THE GIRLS ARE ALWAYS CHEATING!
Ash angrily walked away leaving behind a sarcastic Sakura.
~
Ash: We accept people's privacy.
~
Ash was looking out of the window with a pair of binoculars.
Ash: Look! Lina Inverse is coming up the driveway! And who's in the next car?
Tai: Let me see!
Tai took out a large telescope and looked out of the window.
~
Tai: Plus, its fun.
~
Sakura was sleeping at her chair, while Ash was tossing some small nachos at Tai who is doing
some crosswords.
~
Ash: I mean, we really do respect each other.
~
Ash: That really got into Sakura's red van!
Sakura ran in and whacked Ash with a red frying pan from behind.
Ash: Ow.
~
Sakura: We really are trying to be acceptible to the humor standards they set.
~
*Burp!*
Sakura was next to a mike with Tai.
Tai: Sakura!
~
Tai: All of us do our research on the topic.
~
Ash, Tai and Sakura were reading glossip magazines as Tai looks at a centerfold of a sports
magazine.
~
Ash: We tend to get many good celeberties on the show.
~
The clock was ticking as between Ash and Sakura is a purple Dinosaur.
~
The Glass House: Ash, Tai and Sakura: Exposed.
~
Sakura was sarcastically watching Ash making a fake trumpet noise.
*Intro*
Sakura was near a barb wire fence.
Sakura: Look at these barb wires. They think they could keep me out.
Sakura stood up in front of Tomoyo's house surrounded by a Barb wire fence. Then Sakura
started to have tears in her eyes.
Sakura: Hoe! Why can't they let me in for lunch.
*
The Glass House: The Pilot episode
By PikaFlash
Disclaimers: As usual, all characters, scenes, songs, ideas and other goods belong to their
respective owners.
Idea of the fic: The Glass House has nothing to do with a Glass house, its more like the
misadventures of Ash Ketchum, Sakura Avalon and Taichi Kamiya and brief appearences of people
like Big M and a few guests who sound like real people and the return of characters like
the Dateless brock and the Digimon Izzy.
*
Ash: Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. I don't mean to alarm anyone but reports have been
coming out of the Digi-World that there are problems between Pokemon and Digimon.
Ash tosses a piece of paper away.
Ash: To put it in perspective, the contested area is only three times as big as the Goku's
hair. But you can't get lice there. Now as far as we can tell these problems haven't
escalated to the point where baby Digimons are being thrown off ships, but some of the
in-trainings have been shooting bubbles into shopping malls. Is it a war, a conflict, a
police action, a series of reprisals, a trans-dimensional dispute, Japanese terrorism, or a
theological debate which got way out of hand?
Ash takes a cup of water and drinks it.
Ash: But at the end of the day I don't care if one monster can run faster than the other
monster. The two bullet heads in charge of this idiocracy, Giovanni and Ken Ichijouji, have
been invited by DBZ territory President Goku, who it seems is over it as well, to continue
their peace negotiations at a resort. Well, that's not going to work. All that's going to
happen is they will start arguing over the mini bar bill.
Ash *mimicing Giovanni*: "I did not have Pringles. I'll blow you up!"
Ash *mimicing Ken*: "You had the Pringles. I saw you have the Pringles. Call in all Digimons!
The bastard had Pringles!"
*
A plane is in the air, creating the writing, "Taichi Yagame" with Ash, Tai and Sakura
watching from the ground when suddenly, the a message from the plane was heard.
*Transmitter: Err, Taichi, we seem to have made a slight mistake.*
Tai took a mike.
Tai: I'll be up in a jiffy!
Tai, Ash and Sakura ran into a plane and they quickly took off with the Plane's name
TC-Eraser01.
*
Tai was at his comfy chair.
Tai: Alright, time for our first guest of this season. Rika from Digimon Tamers.
Rika enters the studio from a door near Tai, but she whispers into Tai's ear.
Rika: I have a stalker.
Tai: I know. She tells me to tell you that she has a surprise cause she's here.
Jeri enters the studio from the door behind Tai.
Jeri: I am making a special room where she comes to live with me, Tai. And make sure that
she plans to starve herself and when she dies, I plan to wear her beautiful skin.
Tai: Ah ha. I see.
Tai leaves the studio through the door behind his comfy couch.
~
Tai exits the door and walks into his office and sits next to his phone and looks at a list
of numbers.
Tai: Ah, here is it. Time to make fun of this plumbing service called "Potter's Plumbing."
Tai dials the number and waits for the phone on the other end to be picked up.
*An English accent from the other end: Hi, this is Harry Potter speaking.*
Tai suddenly relised something.
Tai *Japanese accent*: Sorry, wrong number.
Tai hangs up the phone.
*
Brock was sitting next to Clair in a restraunt.
Brock: I can't stand old people being bullied and locked up in their villages. I mean, I'm
against the locking up of old people in nursing homes. That's why I'm dating you.
Clair angrilly stands up and walks away.
Brock: Check please.
*
Tai: Well the Digi-World President is here. And as the duty for being elected-by-idiot boss
of this territory we have to treat him with respect. But that shouldn't be a problem. We
Anime characters are good at acting.
Tai picks up a broom and a mop.
Tai: So if he is the boss, and I think he is, then we've got a bit of cleaning up to do. And
we have to tackle it together. As a dot on a map...Don't laugh. It could work.
Tai pulls out a timetable.
Tai: So Agumon, you're on dishes. Gabumon, get that river drinkable again. Gomamon, get all
those dead bodies into a tuxedo. Patamon, pick up after yourself. Gatomon, keep on doing what
you're doing, but just make it a bit shinier. And Veemon, don't worry, he won't be visiting
you.
*The misadventures of Ash, Tai and Sakura: The glasses*
In Sakura's house, Ash and Sakura were sitting at the dining table with a pot full of water as
Ash is holding a pair of glasses over the pot.
Ash: So, the point in this is that I'm using uncle's glasses to make sure that you can cook
ramen by using the glasses like a magnifying glass. But we need another pair.
Sakura looked around the room to see a sleeping Eli on the couch.
Sakura: I got it!
Sakura took Eli's glasses and put the glasses together, as the light was attempting to boil
the water, suddenly, a concentrated beam of light hits Eli's glasses, melting part of it.
Sakura: AHHH!!!
Eli woke up and stood from the couch.
Eli: What happ..whoa!
Eli tripped over the coffee table as he was finding his way to the kitchen.
Eli: Where is my glasses?
Sakura: Errr, I think Ash must have nearly melted them!
Eil: WHAT?! How can I read or see anything without my glasses?!
Sakura: Ash, I think we need to take Eriol out to somewhere where he can get new glasses.
~
Ash, Sakura and Eli were walking through the streets.
Ash: Lets check at any glasses shop.
Ash walked to one which has the offer for US$150 for glasses repairs.
Ash: Too expensive.
As Ash pulled Sakura away, the duo forgot about the short-sighted Eli as he was looking
around for Sakura.
Eli: Sakura?
A Gabumon was walking by as he looks at Eli. Then the Gabumon puts a coin onto Eli's hand.
Eli: Who was that?
Ash and Sakura walked to another shop offering US$100 for repairs.
Ash: Not worth it.
Ash turned around to see one final shop, offering US$50 for new glasses and you'll get one
free pair of glasses.
Ash: Perfect! Where's Eli?
Sakura sees Eli looking blankly around carrying lots of coins.
Sakura: Come on Eli.
Sakura pulled Eli as he was still carrying the coins.
*
Ash and Tai were sitting in a cafe.
Tai: The collapse of gaming giant SNK is the biggest corporate collapse since the Head of
Nelvana fell off his horse.
Ash: SNK's boss was forced to resign with 70 mails tucked under his mattress, and a former
SNK Character blew his brains out in a company BMW. Fortunately the car's still under
warranty and SNK may be able to claim the bullet as a tax deduction.
Ash and Tai were walking out in the street.
Tai: Now the plot thickens. Not only was SNK Goku's main campaign backer, it was also
involved in negotiations with the Ken Ichijouji to run an oil pipeline across the Digi-World.
The talks suddenly stopped, shortly before a UFO flew over, leading to a passel of conspiracy
theories, involving everybody from Goku to Ken. So is there a connection between the collapse
of SNK and Goku's vase wealth?
Ash: Nobody who knows the truth would talk to us, so we decided to speak to our good friend, a
Man in a Gutter. Thanks for your time.
Ash and Tai were at a gutter.
Man: I'm whelmed to be here. And could I just make the point that I'm a self-funded vagrant.
Tai: No. So tell us, what does the biggest corporate collapse in history look like from the
cashless end of humanity?
Man: Well, as my old dad used to say, "Remember son, there'll always be rich folk starting
corprate collaspes and there'll always be poor folk forced to be kicked out...and that's why
I'm wearing your mother's dress and hiding in the wood shed."
Ash: Piddling family anecdotes aside, what's that got to do with SNK?
Man: On the surface it just looks like another case of the rich ripping off the gullible
middle classes...
Ash: With respect, low-life scum like you would say that. It's the politics of envy.
Man: With respect, the politics of impotent rage is more applicable in my case. But as my
Aunt Jessebelle used to say, "Money is everything, darling. And that's why I'm screwing your
father in the woodshed".
Tai: So you're implying something nasty in SNK's woodshed?
Man: Well as my old mother used to say, "Oil's the life blood of civilisation, son...and
very handy for burning down woodsheds".
Tai: Are all your family psychotic?
Man: Well, as my old grand dad used to say, "Madness is just a state of mind, son. Never let
it stop you asking the basic questions - Who stands to gain the most. Who gets the money? Why
is your father on fire and who burnt down the woodshed?"
Ash's jaw dropped.
Ash: So who does stand to gain the most, after the UFO flew over?
Man: Well, the game companies get their gaming consoles. CD dealers avoid another collaspe
scare. Goku and Krillin get massive funding increases from phone bills. And friendly Animes
territories to Goku get more aid. And the Digies and Pokies can escalate their tit for tat
reprisals till we lose track of who's doing the titting and who's doing the tatting. In fact,
just last week I saw two tats in a row without a single tit in between. All down to the UFO.
So my grand dad's basic question still remains...Who's really responsible for burning down
the woodshed?
Ash: Sounds like a massive paranoid conspiracy theory to me.
Man: I used to think that too. Now I'm absolutely convinced my mother dunnit.
Ash: Thanks for your loony insights.
Man: It passes the time.
*The North Wing*
A picture of Goku's house is seen.
Narrator: On the series return of the North Wing. Big Head Vegetable plans on giving out his
opinions on illegal aliens in Mexico.
Vegeta was walking in a press confrence.
*Vegeta: It is not my problem. Just send them back to where they came from.*
Narrator: Congressman Kai is satasfied with the removal of former Senator Sakura.
Sakura with some reporters.
*Sakura: I will take a short vacation.*
Narrator: And President Sun Goko goes off to celebrate his victory over lunch with President
Ken Ichijouji of the Digi-World.
*Goku: That's my cue to leave.*
Goku is seen raising his hands at a press confrence.
Narrator: The North Wing, it is the best everyone could do.
*
Brock was sitting next to Whitney in a restraunt.
Brock: I cannot believe how beautiful you are. You must have used make up and good smelling
perfume to be like that.
Whitney: Why, thank you. How do you know?
Brock: I was watching you through a telescope.
Whitney stood up and walk away, leaving Brock behind.
Brock: Check please.
*
At an auction, Sakura was at a stand with a vase.
Sakura: Ok, a hundred thousand, anymore?
Guy: A hundred and ten thousand.
Sakura: A hundred and ten thousand!
Businessguy: A hundred and twenty!
Sakura: Ok, a hundred and twenty thousand! Anymore?
Woman: A hundred and thirty!
Sakura: Ok! A hundred and thirty! Anymore? Going once, going twice.
Sakura accidently smashed the vase with the hammer.
Sakura: Gone.
*
Tai was in a senate.
Tai: I would like to say...
A Pokemon politician in the background: What this about an appropriate time, in the
appropriate place, not in an inappropriate manner, in the appropriate moment, with the
appropriate idea that this appropriate senator has to say?
Tai: Well.
Senator Mimi: This senator's time has run out. You are the weakest link.
Tai's jaw dropped as he left the senate.
*
Brock was preparing to jump off a balcony when Ash was just passing by.
Ash: Wait, Brock! Don't jump!
Ash stopped Brock from jumping.
Ash: Brock, there's things in the world that aren't insolvable. Look, there's many other
things in life that you can do.
Ash and Brock leaned on the .
Brock: You're right, Ash. I'll start again tomorrow.
Ash: That's good.
Ash and Brock's weight combined and the metal rail blocking the way bended until Brock and
Ash starting falling off the building and landed on the ground below.
*
Ken was at the bank when he bumps into Yolei.
Yolei: Hey, you're cute.
Ken: I'm not cute. I'm Ken.
*
Tai was dressed as an advertiser.
Tai: Hurry, hurry, hurry! We are selling this one stock blender that is on the table next to
Izzy.
The camera faces Izzy to see wrapped bleeding bandages on both his hands with some
(fake) blood in the blender.
*
Tai was seen breaking many wooden boards around a dojo with Ash watching.
Tai: Do you Pokemon Trainers understand Ka-ra-te?
Ash: We Pokemon Trainers understand hair-pulling.
Tai: Then, show me.
Ash pulled all of Tai's hair off his head.
Tai: AHHH!!!
Tai ran out of the dojo.
*
Tai was wearing a SeeD Uniform.
Tai: Welcome to this new panel show, its called Final Fantasies 11, with me, as the host,
and my 11 other Fantasy characters, from Aeris to Zell.
Tai was sitting in between 11 Final Fantasy characters, all dressed in SeeD Uniform at
an extremely large table fit for 12 characters, including the host.
*
TK and Matt were at a desk.
Matt: How's mom?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's dad?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's Kari?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's you?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's Tai?
TK: He's all right.
Matt: Good.
*
Sora was watching Tai on his knees.
Tai: Sora, you are the moon, I am the clouds! You can have anything I own. You bring me
all the happiness I need.
Sora stood up.
Sora: I'm convinced, I accept your proposal.
Tai started laughing.
Sora: What's so funny?
Tai: I did it! Its the conversation I'm going to tell Yolei. I was just trying it out on you.
Sora: You nut!
Seconds later, Tai left Sora's apartment with a red hand mark on his face.
*
Izzy was standing infront of a Digi-Port...
Izzy: Digimon. *points at the computer*
*Note: This is an official announcement from Goku's goverment.*
The following people on this list have been thrown overboard:
Yamcha
Phil Pinty
Senator Mimi Tachikawa
Meilin Rae
Madison Taylor
Leo Di Capatated
Katie Windset
Krillin and his US$100, 000 phone bills
Team Rocket
Jessie and James
*
Brock was sitting next to Clair.
Brock: I believe that make up makes a woman who they are.
Clair: That's right.
Brock: So, is that why you're wearing a mask?
Clair angrilly stood up and walked away.
Brock: Check please.
*
Sakura and Li were sitting on a sofa, drinking wine...
Sakura: No no no. We don't treat Yue as a servant.
Li: In fact, we treat him as a normal person, an equal.
Sakura: That's right.
Sakura and Li placed their wine glasses on Yue, who was on his knees on the floor, acting
as the table...
*
P.Oak was standing up.
P.Oak: This is a basic form of exercise for Pokemon researchers. The left arm stretch. Whoa!
P.Oak landed on P.Ivy and Bill while playing Twister on the floor.
*
Kero was standing in the streets of Hong Kong facing the camera...
Kero: Welcome to Kero's people, where I'm going to tell you about the diffrences
between living in Hong Kong and Tokyo. The first person we'll see is a poor homeless man
trying to make a living.
Kero faces Li in the crowd...and Li holds up a tissue paper...
Li: Tissue?
Kero walks to the next person...
Kero: This next one, a mute Chinese woman who tries to ask people to donate money for her
children.
Meiling was holding a sign saying, "Please give me money for my kids."
Kero: No.
Meiling drops the sign to make out another sign, saying "Please?"
Kero: No.
Meiling drops a few more signs saying, "Please"...
Kero: No!
As Kero walks pass Meiling, she takes out one last sign, saying, "Well, SOD you then!"...
Kero: And here, we see a man, trying to make us feel sorry for him with the help of his pet.
Yue was holding a rope...
Yue: Sit. Sit!
Yue pulls the rope, which was tied to a Panda who doesn't want to sit...
*Fox NEWS!!!*
Tai is seen at a newsdesk.
Tai: We interupt this fanfic for an important news report. There is an aromatheraphy
spill in the middle of Downtown Tokyo. One woman, Sakura Kinomoto, was the first person
hospitalised for being induced by this aroma. We would liek to give you more updates but we
took out time. Thank you.
*
Izzy was under some buzzing power lines in the Digi-World...
Izzy: Digimon. *points up.
*
Narrator: What we meet here is one of the richest man in the whole of Asia. He's living a life
of luxury. He has diffrent homes on many continents and he has a home on one cruise ships
where people at his level can enjoy. He is the Professor Oak.
Professor Oak was on a inflatable chair in a swimming pool...
P.Oak was in front of a camera...
P.Oak: Ever since I was young, I always felt that I was diffrent from the other boys...
*School was over and as the other students run off, P.Oak was carrying a checklist*
Narrator: Professor Oak is a very famous Pokemon Scientist.
P.Oak was sitting on a field watching Pokemon when a Pokemon watcher sees P.Oak, puts
his backpack down and watches the Pokemon P.Oak was watching, only to have P.Oak looking at
the Pokemon watcher and then gets up and swipes the backpack...
Narrator: Professor Oak is one of the controversal professors in Pokemon History. He claims
that he is even better than Mew.
P.Oak was sitting on an office chair...
P.Oak: I also even met 4 of the greatest people in history.
*P.Oak was sitting in a room with Madison, Giovanni, Goku and Gennai*
*P.Oak: The path of Pokemon is the path to lunch.*
Narrator: He also created a place for his research, called Celebi's Palace
*The camera is in front of a casino*
Narrator: And now, Professor Oak is now giving out a speech about his new book.
P.Oak was sitting at a table full of books.
P.Oak: Welcome to the showing of my new Book, "Oak's guide on how to be a trainer and still
earn money by eating at Joe's", sponsered by "Joe's". The first point of writing this book is
to give a good guide on being a cheap trainer while making lots of money while battling. And
a last piece of advise, "Hurry up and buy my book!"
*
Kero was in front of a crowd of people in Tokyo...
Kero: As a country like Japan, many people work hard to earn as much money as they can. And
its where technology of the west meets the technology of the east.
Then, Tai walked in from the crowd...
Tai: Television?
Kero: Yes?
Tai: KidsWB?
Kero: Yes.
Tai: Keroberos?
Kero: Yes.
Tai: HEY LOOK! ITS KEROBEROS!!!
Kero: Hold it! This is not live TV!
Tai: Oh. FALSE ALARM!
*
Sakura and Li were next to a car.
Sakura: Yue is just like any normal person we treat.
Li: Yeah, I mean. Holidays without him won't be the same.
Li opens the boot of his car to see Yue carrying all the luggages.
*
Tai is standing in the empty studio.
Tai: Right now, I'm here planning on interviewing the President of the Digi-World, Ken
Ichijouji over his idea of being on radio 24/7. Right through the phone to this studio
is President Ken himself.
A photo of a happy Ken appeared.
*Ken: Hi everybody!*
Tai: Hi, Mr. President. So, Mr. President, how do you propose on the plan on being on the
radio?
*Ken: To tell my rivals to get up themselves.*
Tai: I see. so, any plans on going to your new radio station over the air in the Digi-World?
Its a long trip between Japan and the Digi-World.
*Ken: Yes, hello Tai and hello to all my wonderful, wonderful listeners who will be
tuning their dials in the Digi-World very shortly.*
Tai: So, why the idea?
*Ken: Well Tai, as you know I'm big on loyalty, I pick and stick, and the station made me a
very sticky offer. I still live in Japan, but the postcode has changed.*
Tai: Are you looking forward to working with your close friend Davis Motomiya?
*Ken: Delighted Tai, simply delighted. Shingo, if I can call him that, and I think I can, is
a visionary. And a very, very committed and wealthy visionary at that. We have a partnership
now, in a very loyal, friendly and legally binding sense.*
Tai: Can you give us some insight into your popularity Mr. President?
*Ken: Simple Tai. I represent the common man, the helpless Struggling Street V-Tamer.*
Tai: Most common Monster Tamers aren't on $4 million a year.
*Ken: Let me assure you Tai that it's a very common struggling on 4 million.*
Tai: Any comment on Johto and Kanto's Radio stations before joining the ranks of radio
show hosts?
*Ken: They're amateurs, Tai. Who's going to listen to some rich bloated North-wing
mouthpiece.*
Tai: Thank you Ken.
*Ken: No, thank you Tai. And thanks to my wonderful listeners who stick by me. At times I
feel like an Emperor or a Kaiser.*
Suddenly, a voice spoke out.
*Voice: Look sorry to interrupt. It's President Goku at Goku's house here. Would you mind
repeating that last bit? It's dark in the basement and I'm taking it all down long-hand.*
Tai: I thought the President Goku was only allowed to intercept calls that were a threat to
Anime character's lives and security? You're just tampering with a private communication.
*Voice: There! You said Private. That's all we need. There'll be a full report at Goku's
office in the morning.*
Tai: Ken, are you still there? Back me up.
*Ken: Sorry Tai, I live for my listeners. Where ever they are.*
*
Izzy was dressed as Santa Claus while shaking presents as he each passes one to each
Digimon...
Izzy: Digimon, Digimon, Digimon, Digimon, Digimon.
Then a Cardcaptor and a Pokemon trainer walks to Izzy as he shakes two presents that has
broken stuffs inside...
Izzy: Not Digimon.
*
Kero was in Paris, France.
Kero: Welcome to Kero's people, where I'm in Paris, where we are having an experiment to
see if the Eiffel Tower is really made of steel.
Suddenly Ash was flying with a big magnet as they crashed onto the tower.
Kero: Its a success.
*
At a funeral service. Ash and Sakura were carrying a packet of fish and chips with Tai
crying.
Tai: Why did you have to die, Sora?
Sora was sitting at a bench as Tai was about to walk pass her.
Sora: Tai. I am never letting you name your fish after me.
Then, at the coffin.
Tai: Sora was a good pet goldfish to me. And she was almost like the Sora we still have.
Tai started to cry on Ash's shoulders as Sakura and Ash walks Tai away.
At a house.
Tai, Ash and Sakura were eating fish and chips.
Tai: Why did Sora have to die?
Ash: Well, Sora may have gone to a better place.
Tai sees TK and Kari holding an empty fish tank.
Tai: Kari! TK! You killed Sora! You bastards!
Sakura walks to Kari.
Sakura: Tai is in one of his emotional stages at the moment.
Kari: I know. Tk and I will be out of the house. Remember to lock before you leave.
Sakura: Alright.
Sakura walks back to Tai.
Tai: At least we still have Mr. Tinkles.
Ash: Mr Tinkles?
Tai: The office cat.
Sakura: Well, lets just say that err...
Ash: Have some dim sum, Tai.
Tai took one and ate it as he finds some hair on his tounge.
*
P.Oak: So, basically, the role of Mewtwo doesn't make up for his mental stability, but his
will to live.
Bill: I see.
P.Oak: Professor Ivy, your turn.
P.Ivy pulls out whole pile of blocks, causing the Jenga set to fall over.
*
Sakura and Li were sitting on a sofa.
Sakura: We do not treat Yue as a servant, I mean. We are very high class people.
Li: That's right. We get sattalite TV. CNN, BBC, Bloomberg, Cartoon Network, FoxKids, KidsWB,
Nickleodean.
On Li's remote is connected to a wire, which is connected to Yue on the roof moving the
sattalite dish to get the reception.
*
Tai was at his comfy couch with Ash, Sakura and Izzy at the couch.
Tai: Our next guest is a character who plays Tori Avalon in Cardcaptors, Touya Kinomoto.
Touya entered the studio from the door behind Tai and sits next to Izzy.
Touya: Hi.
Tai: So, Touya. How do you like America?
Touya: Well...
Sakura: He sleep-talks!
Touya: HEY!
Tai: I see. So, how do you like the job as Tori Avalon?
Touya: The...
Ash: It just sucks working for a Canadian company.
Tai: I know.
Touya: But...
Tai: One more question. Are you really gay?
Touya: Well...
Izzy: Its not logical that his hormones are going wild because he thinks he's like a girl
liking a friend named Yukito.
Tai: I see. Thanks for your time, Touya.
Touya: By the way, I met Yamato Ishida down the street and...
Sakura: By the way, Touya also has a doll named Wings.
Ash: Wings? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Izzy: Now that's logically funny!
Tai: It cracks me up!
Touya leaves the studio through the door behind Tai's couch at the same time, behind the
door, a dropping bomb sound is heard but it stopped when Touya closed the door.
*The North Wing*
A picture of Goku's house is seen.
Narrator: The political drama continues on this week's The North Wing.
Davis was seen walking towards his office.
Narrator: Digi-world Vice-President Big Dave Motomiya is angered because he's been elected
as the Vice-President of the Digi-World.
*Davis: It was Ken's decision, nothing else. I couldn't do anything about it.*
Vegeta and Zachery were sitting in a confrence room.
Narrator: Meanwhile, Big Head Vegeta and Big M Yamazaki are discussing about being seen nude
on calender.
*Vegeta: Its a chance to be a humble Vice-President.*
Ken was walking through the Media at a press confrence.
Narrator: But Digi-World President Ken isn't liking the idea of the calenders.
*Ken: I find these images applauding and are complete fakes. They can be easily altered with
the number of people working for President Goku's goverment.*
Goku was at a press confrence.
Narrator: And finally, President Sun Goko comments on Congresswoman Sakura's action.
*Goku: It is very pleasing to you.*
Goku was seen raising his arms up in the air waving.
Narrator: The North Wing. It is the best everyone could do.
*FAQ time!*
Tai was at a desk with some letters.
Tai: We love getting questions here on the show, except for those ones about why we're
still here. Just because we haven't been giving anything any thought over Christmas does
not mean our dedicated readers have been that lazy. Over the break we were inundated with
questions for everything from "Will Giovanni lose it big time and grow a beard like Al Gore?"
to "Why doesn't a plagurist copy an indecent fanfic?"
Tai takes out some papers.
Tai: Here's a selection from our Email:
Jim Kido from Odaiba asks: "Is there any connection between Ken Ichijouji, the the new
President of the DigiWorld, and Barbie's Ken?"
Tai: Why yes Jim, there is. A recent poll found that 65% of Japanese Kids would like their
dream to be any Ken...and vice versa.
Tomoyo Daidouji from Tomoeda in Japan asks: "What's the go with Sakura getting the boot?
She's so hot and she sings pretty good too. And she's heaps hotter than Mimi. Like heaps. So
what if she's messed up in the head. who isn't? I mean, what's up with that?"
Tai: Now Tomoyo...I don't understand your question. If, indeed, that is a question. I
think the answer is to stay in school. Anyway, some people are constantly searching for
answers leads some viewers to write to us in desperation. Like this question:
"I live in the Digi-World and I'm not quite sure what it means now that Ken won the
Presidental election."
Tai: Well, Biyomon of... File Island, as far as you're concerned, it's really neither here
nor there for you is it now?
Oficer Jenny of Vermillion in Kanto asks: "Is it wrong for P. Oak to keep the captured
Pokemon in an enclosed land?"
No Jenny, it's not. As long as they are treated humanely, Which means the paper at the
bottom of the cages is changed daily and they are given a mirror or a ladder to keep them
occupied.
*
Ash: Lets look on what happened recently during the break.
Sakura: Two of the former top executives of SNK have decided to start up a new game company
called KNS.
Ash: Well at least it was better than their other names "S and K", "Let's Go Bankrupt" and
"Hey Moron, Why Not Use All Your Game Credit On Us.".
Sakura: Pokemon scientists researching the Ruins of Alph believe that they have found the
worlds oldest fossilised vomit.
Ash: As expected, it contained the world's oldest fossilised carrot.
Sakura: Japanese free style aerialist Sakura Kinomoto says that diet coke mixed with
crushed bugs helped her recover from a neck injury.
Ash: Sadly her hopes for a medal were ruined when in the middle of her event someone
unexpectedly turned a light on and she had to scurry under a fridge.
Sakura: President Goku has been nominated for President for the third consecutive year.
Ash: This year it's for his stunning work in his home video "Hey Bulma, didn't expect
you home so soon, Vegeta and I are.. training, yes -training.
Sakura: The producers of the Carney the Dino have decided to simplify the show's storylines.
Ash: Hopefully I'll be able to understand their songs.
Sakura: Senator Mimi Tachikawa this week admitted to a reporter that she doesn't know
who Ping Pong is.
Ash: When the reporter told her who she meant she said," Oh King Kong."
Sakura: Sora Takenouchi is to make her stage debut in a play written by Phil Pinty.
Ash:
Takenouchi and Pinty. I smell box office.
Sakura: A new biography of Digi-World President Ken claims he once did cocaine with
The Teenage wolves.
Ash: He also stung Matt for drug dealing.
Sakura: A letter from a clerk has revealed that the names Pallet and Indigo are gay.
Ash: Does this mean we have to rename Pallet Town?
*
Tai: One of the issues raised by the governor-general controversy is the distinction being
drawn between Ken Ichijouji the President of the Digi-World, and the office of the President
of the Digi-World. While Ken Ichijouji has had ample media time, we decided to give his
office the chance to speak.
On the Screen is an empty office with a picture of Ken.
*Office: Thank you Tai.*
Tai: What are your thoughts on the current crisis?
*Office: "Frankly, I'm sick of being dragged into all this mess. Why aren't they going on
about the office of the President of DBZ territory? Lovely chap, more a post really than a
office, but he's hurting.*
Tai: Do you feel your reputation is being diminished?
*Office: I don't have a reputation, Tai. I have a status, an importance, a gravitas.*
Tai: So you disagree with President Goku that kicking President Ken would damage you, the
office.
*Office: He might leave a few fingernail marks in my wall as he's dragged out kicking and
screaming, but essentially I shall remain in mint condition.*
Tai: You'll rise above it all.
*Office: I was having a good chat about this with the office of the President of the DBZ
territory. Basically, we decided that we still command a level of respect, despite what
clowns may do in us.
Tai: What if the Digi-World becomes under the rule of an Emperor again?
*Office: I'll simply apply for the role of the office of the Digimon Emperor. Offices
change jobs all the time you know. The office for the Status of Digimon, for example. Used
to be the Digimon Emperor's kitchen.*
Tai: Finally, office, do you think President Ken will serve out his full term?
*Office: He'll be there as long as the people realise the great and important role the
President plays in the Digi-World.*
Tai: Which means?
*Office: Next Christmas at the latest.*
Tai: Thanks for your time. Is the President's time running out? Sakura has more.
-
Sakura: Thanks Tai. Following the "Ichijouji" scandal, questions are being asked as to how
information filters up to President Ken's aides. I'm here with Senior Department Adviser
Jeri's puppet, Junior Department Adviser Wormmon and Assistant Junior Department
Adviser's Clerk Taichi. Firstly, could I ask you how the reportage process works
in general.
Sakura is seen next to a puppet, Wormmon and Taichi.
Taichi: Well, I collect all relevant data from all sources, double check the veracity and
compile a detailed summary with comments in bullet point form.
Wormmon: I summarise Taichi's summary and distill it in Pencil and email the highlights up
the line.
Puppet: I read the email, delete all the words of more than one syllable, perhaps add a few
pictures to illustrate some of the more difficult concepts and forward it to the puppet in
question.
Sakura: Can you help us understand how the current confusion arose?
Taichi: My initial summary of the situation, which was quite artistic if I say so myself,
went something like - "A Digi-Beetle intercepted a truck-load of refugee Digimon Champions,
Rookies and In-Trainings, which once again has thrown up the need for action, though I
suggest we don't go overboard in our response.
Wormmon: Which was of course far too wordy, so I truncated it into - refugee Digimon
Champions, Rookies and In-Trainings have thrown up the need for action, don't go overboard.
Puppet: But of course that was far too long for a puppet lime me to contemplate, so I
picked out the key-words - In-Training, thrown, overboard.
Sakura: How simple.
Puppet: I almost put, In-Training, thrown up, overboard, but you can't say at the opinion of
a Digi-World with a soundbyte about President Ken's hair.
Sakura: No, I think we get it. Thank you all.
Taichi: Thank you and good night.
Wormmon: Good night.
Puppet: Night.
*The North Wing*
A picture of Goku's house is seen.
Narrator: On the latest issue of the North Wing, President Sun Goko tells us how First Lady
Chichi pleasured him.
Goku is standing at a press confrence.
*Goku: I just wanted to find out what happened in the past 50 years.*
Narrator: At the same time, Senator Mei Meiling Tachikawa went to her first Barney the
Dinosaur concert.
Mimi was standing in front of a camera.
*Mimi: The images are so applading and offensive.*
Narrator: But all is not over yet as Senator Mei Meiling Tachikawa looks at a book done by
Digi-World President, Ken Ichijouji called "The Love of My Life: DigiCrat Style".
Ken was seen at a news confrence.
*Ken: I suppose we could keep it in its original place.*
Narrator: At the same time, Vice-President Big Head Vegetable says that he is on the side
of Digi-World President Ken.
*Vegeta: I swear that I will eridicate every from of prejudice.*
Narrator: The North Wing, it is the best everyone can do.
*
Joe was looking into a microscope.
Joe: Just as I suspected...things.
*
Tai was at the table.
Tai: At this moment, we would like to invite Takato Matsuda and Daisuke Motomiya to join
on the stage to play the rumored new season of CardCaptors Theme.
Davis and Takato were seen on stage and Davis was playing the guitar.
Davis: There're many cards, we could understand them, we sometimes wish its all for fate.
Takato: Its just only just a way, to hide my true feelings.
Davis/Takato: Cause its all just in the cards!
Suddenly, a piano crashed from the above and crushed Takato and Davis.
Back at Tai's desk, Tai was just staring at the stage.
Tai: Now, that's not one thing you would see everyday. Anyway, I have this empty feeling.
This empty feeling that...I should go body pile Clow Reed! LET'S GO!
Tai ran to the back stage, followed by Ash and Sakura, then 3 crew members.
~
As Clow Reed left the toilet, he saw Tai and his crew body piling Clow Reed as Tai jumped
first, followed by Ash, Sakura, then the 3 crew members.
Tai: Alright, back to work.
Tai and the crew ran off, leaving a confused Clow Reed.
*
Tai was coughing.
Tai *a very deep voice*: Sorry, I just accidently eaten something that lowers your voice
instantly, so give me a minute.
Tai took a helium balloon and suck in all the helium.
Tai *normal voice*: Finally, back to my old voice. Expected me to have a very high-pitch
voice, did ya? Over to you Iz.
~
Izzy was next to a landed UFO when it exploded.
~
Tai, Ash and Sakura were watching the explosion at the couch.
Tai: That was another weird one. Anyway, its the end of the show. We expect that you would
keep reading, so I hope to see you again and say hi to your mom for me! BYE!!!
*
[End of fic]
Tai's joke Credits:
Executive Producer: Tai Yagami (That's right, the Tai.)
Assistant Producer: Satoshi Kastumoto and Sakura Kinomoto (The two useless bludgers.)
Make up and costume design: Tomoyo Daidouji (She's good. Really good.)
Runner: Kari Yagami (aka. Mini Yagami)
Editor: Koushiro Izumi (Another useless crewmember)
Camera: Todd the cameraman (Perfect in my closeups.)
Refreshments: Kasumi Yawa (Just ask for milk.)
Sketch creators:
Koushiro "Izzy" Izumi
Madison Taylor
Ash Ketchum
Sakura Avalon
Tai Kamiya
Cast:
Starring:
Ash Ketchum
Tai Kamiya
Sakura Avalon
Other cast:
Misty Waters
Sora Takenouchi
Li Shaoran
Madison Taylor
P.Oak
P.Ivy
Bill
Brock
Izzy
Rika
Jeri
The characters prefer to be in the originals.
Planned by Tai Enterprises with the help of the Daidouji Corperation.
Has no affiliation with: Gamefreaks, Toei, Clamp and the list goes on and on...
Hey!: Whole stole the rest of the credits for this pilot?
To replace the missing credits, here's some Joke Credits:
Fluff
Aeris Gainsburough
President Goku
Big M Yamazaki
Say hi to Matt for me!
Phew...
*Final Scene*
Izzy was in the streets of a Digimon city...
Izzy: Digimon. Digimon. Digimon. Digimon.
Izzy steps on some Digimon poop and as Izzy looks down, he points at it.
Izzy: Digimon.
*
Dedicated to Aeris Gainsburough: Beginning of FF7 to End of FF7 Disk 1
Goon but not forgotten.
*
Tai and Izzy were sitting at a piano.
Tai: Here are for those of you within the Asia-Pacific rim who want to call our new number,
at...
Izzy plays the piano...
Izzy *singing*: 1 411, 811, 8115...
Tai: For those of you who are on International areas who want to call us...
Izzy *singing*: 1 411, 6321, 2423, 7839...
Tai: And for those of you who want to call from another planet like Planet Vegeta...
Izzy *singing*: Pikus 1411, 1 eatus 55, 592, 0000, 700406, 377, 3451, bee bee bop be be bee
pop 4123!
Tai: Errr...yeah.
*
The piano crashed from above and crushed Davis and Takato.
*Truly the end of the fic*
President Ken is wanting to be on the radio.
Tai Yagami wishes to be paid US$2, 000, 000 for the information to be given to the Digicrats.
*Tai Ads: The Glass House: Exposed*
Ash, Tai and Sakura were in an interview room.
Tai: We've planned a lot for our pilot episode a lot.
~
Tai: FOOD FIGHT!!!
Tai and Sakura tossed food at each other while Ash eats a cake.
~
Sakura: All of us get along with each other.
~
Ash was writing "Sakura is a Bi" on the white board until he saw Sakura outside the meeting
room, Ash quickly rubbed off the words.
~
Ash: We have fair competition.
~
Ash was next to Sakura at the microphone.
Ash: THAT'S IT! THE GIRLS ARE ALWAYS CHEATING!
Ash angrily walked away leaving behind a sarcastic Sakura.
~
Ash: We accept people's privacy.
~
Ash was looking out of the window with a pair of binoculars.
Ash: Look! Lina Inverse is coming up the driveway! And who's in the next car?
Tai: Let me see!
Tai took out a large telescope and looked out of the window.
~
Tai: Plus, its fun.
~
Sakura was sleeping at her chair, while Ash was tossing some small nachos at Tai who is doing
some crosswords.
~
Ash: I mean, we really do respect each other.
~
Ash: That really got into Sakura's red van!
Sakura ran in and whacked Ash with a red frying pan from behind.
Ash: Ow.
~
Sakura: We really are trying to be acceptible to the humor standards they set.
~
*Burp!*
Sakura was next to a mike with Tai.
Tai: Sakura!
~
Tai: All of us do our research on the topic.
~
Ash, Tai and Sakura were reading glossip magazines as Tai looks at a centerfold of a sports
magazine.
~
Ash: We tend to get many good celeberties on the show.
~
The clock was ticking as between Ash and Sakura is a purple Dinosaur.
~
The Glass House: Ash, Tai and Sakura: Exposed.
~
Sakura was sarcastically watching Ash making a fake trumpet noise.
*Intro*
Sakura was near a barb wire fence.
Sakura: Look at these barb wires. They think they could keep me out.
Sakura stood up in front of Tomoyo's house surrounded by a Barb wire fence. Then Sakura
started to have tears in her eyes.
Sakura: Hoe! Why can't they let me in for lunch.
*
The Glass House: The Pilot episode
By PikaFlash
Disclaimers: As usual, all characters, scenes, songs, ideas and other goods belong to their
respective owners.
Idea of the fic: The Glass House has nothing to do with a Glass house, its more like the
misadventures of Ash Ketchum, Sakura Avalon and Taichi Kamiya and brief appearences of people
like Big M and a few guests who sound like real people and the return of characters like
the Dateless brock and the Digimon Izzy.
*
Ash: Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. I don't mean to alarm anyone but reports have been
coming out of the Digi-World that there are problems between Pokemon and Digimon.
Ash tosses a piece of paper away.
Ash: To put it in perspective, the contested area is only three times as big as the Goku's
hair. But you can't get lice there. Now as far as we can tell these problems haven't
escalated to the point where baby Digimons are being thrown off ships, but some of the
in-trainings have been shooting bubbles into shopping malls. Is it a war, a conflict, a
police action, a series of reprisals, a trans-dimensional dispute, Japanese terrorism, or a
theological debate which got way out of hand?
Ash takes a cup of water and drinks it.
Ash: But at the end of the day I don't care if one monster can run faster than the other
monster. The two bullet heads in charge of this idiocracy, Giovanni and Ken Ichijouji, have
been invited by DBZ territory President Goku, who it seems is over it as well, to continue
their peace negotiations at a resort. Well, that's not going to work. All that's going to
happen is they will start arguing over the mini bar bill.
Ash *mimicing Giovanni*: "I did not have Pringles. I'll blow you up!"
Ash *mimicing Ken*: "You had the Pringles. I saw you have the Pringles. Call in all Digimons!
The bastard had Pringles!"
*
A plane is in the air, creating the writing, "Taichi Yagame" with Ash, Tai and Sakura
watching from the ground when suddenly, the a message from the plane was heard.
*Transmitter: Err, Taichi, we seem to have made a slight mistake.*
Tai took a mike.
Tai: I'll be up in a jiffy!
Tai, Ash and Sakura ran into a plane and they quickly took off with the Plane's name
TC-Eraser01.
*
Tai was at his comfy chair.
Tai: Alright, time for our first guest of this season. Rika from Digimon Tamers.
Rika enters the studio from a door near Tai, but she whispers into Tai's ear.
Rika: I have a stalker.
Tai: I know. She tells me to tell you that she has a surprise cause she's here.
Jeri enters the studio from the door behind Tai.
Jeri: I am making a special room where she comes to live with me, Tai. And make sure that
she plans to starve herself and when she dies, I plan to wear her beautiful skin.
Tai: Ah ha. I see.
Tai leaves the studio through the door behind his comfy couch.
~
Tai exits the door and walks into his office and sits next to his phone and looks at a list
of numbers.
Tai: Ah, here is it. Time to make fun of this plumbing service called "Potter's Plumbing."
Tai dials the number and waits for the phone on the other end to be picked up.
*An English accent from the other end: Hi, this is Harry Potter speaking.*
Tai suddenly relised something.
Tai *Japanese accent*: Sorry, wrong number.
Tai hangs up the phone.
*
Brock was sitting next to Clair in a restraunt.
Brock: I can't stand old people being bullied and locked up in their villages. I mean, I'm
against the locking up of old people in nursing homes. That's why I'm dating you.
Clair angrilly stands up and walks away.
Brock: Check please.
*
Tai: Well the Digi-World President is here. And as the duty for being elected-by-idiot boss
of this territory we have to treat him with respect. But that shouldn't be a problem. We
Anime characters are good at acting.
Tai picks up a broom and a mop.
Tai: So if he is the boss, and I think he is, then we've got a bit of cleaning up to do. And
we have to tackle it together. As a dot on a map...Don't laugh. It could work.
Tai pulls out a timetable.
Tai: So Agumon, you're on dishes. Gabumon, get that river drinkable again. Gomamon, get all
those dead bodies into a tuxedo. Patamon, pick up after yourself. Gatomon, keep on doing what
you're doing, but just make it a bit shinier. And Veemon, don't worry, he won't be visiting
you.
*The misadventures of Ash, Tai and Sakura: The glasses*
In Sakura's house, Ash and Sakura were sitting at the dining table with a pot full of water as
Ash is holding a pair of glasses over the pot.
Ash: So, the point in this is that I'm using uncle's glasses to make sure that you can cook
ramen by using the glasses like a magnifying glass. But we need another pair.
Sakura looked around the room to see a sleeping Eli on the couch.
Sakura: I got it!
Sakura took Eli's glasses and put the glasses together, as the light was attempting to boil
the water, suddenly, a concentrated beam of light hits Eli's glasses, melting part of it.
Sakura: AHHH!!!
Eli woke up and stood from the couch.
Eli: What happ..whoa!
Eli tripped over the coffee table as he was finding his way to the kitchen.
Eli: Where is my glasses?
Sakura: Errr, I think Ash must have nearly melted them!
Eil: WHAT?! How can I read or see anything without my glasses?!
Sakura: Ash, I think we need to take Eriol out to somewhere where he can get new glasses.
~
Ash, Sakura and Eli were walking through the streets.
Ash: Lets check at any glasses shop.
Ash walked to one which has the offer for US$150 for glasses repairs.
Ash: Too expensive.
As Ash pulled Sakura away, the duo forgot about the short-sighted Eli as he was looking
around for Sakura.
Eli: Sakura?
A Gabumon was walking by as he looks at Eli. Then the Gabumon puts a coin onto Eli's hand.
Eli: Who was that?
Ash and Sakura walked to another shop offering US$100 for repairs.
Ash: Not worth it.
Ash turned around to see one final shop, offering US$50 for new glasses and you'll get one
free pair of glasses.
Ash: Perfect! Where's Eli?
Sakura sees Eli looking blankly around carrying lots of coins.
Sakura: Come on Eli.
Sakura pulled Eli as he was still carrying the coins.
*
Ash and Tai were sitting in a cafe.
Tai: The collapse of gaming giant SNK is the biggest corporate collapse since the Head of
Nelvana fell off his horse.
Ash: SNK's boss was forced to resign with 70 mails tucked under his mattress, and a former
SNK Character blew his brains out in a company BMW. Fortunately the car's still under
warranty and SNK may be able to claim the bullet as a tax deduction.
Ash and Tai were walking out in the street.
Tai: Now the plot thickens. Not only was SNK Goku's main campaign backer, it was also
involved in negotiations with the Ken Ichijouji to run an oil pipeline across the Digi-World.
The talks suddenly stopped, shortly before a UFO flew over, leading to a passel of conspiracy
theories, involving everybody from Goku to Ken. So is there a connection between the collapse
of SNK and Goku's vase wealth?
Ash: Nobody who knows the truth would talk to us, so we decided to speak to our good friend, a
Man in a Gutter. Thanks for your time.
Ash and Tai were at a gutter.
Man: I'm whelmed to be here. And could I just make the point that I'm a self-funded vagrant.
Tai: No. So tell us, what does the biggest corporate collapse in history look like from the
cashless end of humanity?
Man: Well, as my old dad used to say, "Remember son, there'll always be rich folk starting
corprate collaspes and there'll always be poor folk forced to be kicked out...and that's why
I'm wearing your mother's dress and hiding in the wood shed."
Ash: Piddling family anecdotes aside, what's that got to do with SNK?
Man: On the surface it just looks like another case of the rich ripping off the gullible
middle classes...
Ash: With respect, low-life scum like you would say that. It's the politics of envy.
Man: With respect, the politics of impotent rage is more applicable in my case. But as my
Aunt Jessebelle used to say, "Money is everything, darling. And that's why I'm screwing your
father in the woodshed".
Tai: So you're implying something nasty in SNK's woodshed?
Man: Well as my old mother used to say, "Oil's the life blood of civilisation, son...and
very handy for burning down woodsheds".
Tai: Are all your family psychotic?
Man: Well, as my old grand dad used to say, "Madness is just a state of mind, son. Never let
it stop you asking the basic questions - Who stands to gain the most. Who gets the money? Why
is your father on fire and who burnt down the woodshed?"
Ash's jaw dropped.
Ash: So who does stand to gain the most, after the UFO flew over?
Man: Well, the game companies get their gaming consoles. CD dealers avoid another collaspe
scare. Goku and Krillin get massive funding increases from phone bills. And friendly Animes
territories to Goku get more aid. And the Digies and Pokies can escalate their tit for tat
reprisals till we lose track of who's doing the titting and who's doing the tatting. In fact,
just last week I saw two tats in a row without a single tit in between. All down to the UFO.
So my grand dad's basic question still remains...Who's really responsible for burning down
the woodshed?
Ash: Sounds like a massive paranoid conspiracy theory to me.
Man: I used to think that too. Now I'm absolutely convinced my mother dunnit.
Ash: Thanks for your loony insights.
Man: It passes the time.
*The North Wing*
A picture of Goku's house is seen.
Narrator: On the series return of the North Wing. Big Head Vegetable plans on giving out his
opinions on illegal aliens in Mexico.
Vegeta was walking in a press confrence.
*Vegeta: It is not my problem. Just send them back to where they came from.*
Narrator: Congressman Kai is satasfied with the removal of former Senator Sakura.
Sakura with some reporters.
*Sakura: I will take a short vacation.*
Narrator: And President Sun Goko goes off to celebrate his victory over lunch with President
Ken Ichijouji of the Digi-World.
*Goku: That's my cue to leave.*
Goku is seen raising his hands at a press confrence.
Narrator: The North Wing, it is the best everyone could do.
*
Brock was sitting next to Whitney in a restraunt.
Brock: I cannot believe how beautiful you are. You must have used make up and good smelling
perfume to be like that.
Whitney: Why, thank you. How do you know?
Brock: I was watching you through a telescope.
Whitney stood up and walk away, leaving Brock behind.
Brock: Check please.
*
At an auction, Sakura was at a stand with a vase.
Sakura: Ok, a hundred thousand, anymore?
Guy: A hundred and ten thousand.
Sakura: A hundred and ten thousand!
Businessguy: A hundred and twenty!
Sakura: Ok, a hundred and twenty thousand! Anymore?
Woman: A hundred and thirty!
Sakura: Ok! A hundred and thirty! Anymore? Going once, going twice.
Sakura accidently smashed the vase with the hammer.
Sakura: Gone.
*
Tai was in a senate.
Tai: I would like to say...
A Pokemon politician in the background: What this about an appropriate time, in the
appropriate place, not in an inappropriate manner, in the appropriate moment, with the
appropriate idea that this appropriate senator has to say?
Tai: Well.
Senator Mimi: This senator's time has run out. You are the weakest link.
Tai's jaw dropped as he left the senate.
*
Brock was preparing to jump off a balcony when Ash was just passing by.
Ash: Wait, Brock! Don't jump!
Ash stopped Brock from jumping.
Ash: Brock, there's things in the world that aren't insolvable. Look, there's many other
things in life that you can do.
Ash and Brock leaned on the .
Brock: You're right, Ash. I'll start again tomorrow.
Ash: That's good.
Ash and Brock's weight combined and the metal rail blocking the way bended until Brock and
Ash starting falling off the building and landed on the ground below.
*
Ken was at the bank when he bumps into Yolei.
Yolei: Hey, you're cute.
Ken: I'm not cute. I'm Ken.
*
Tai was dressed as an advertiser.
Tai: Hurry, hurry, hurry! We are selling this one stock blender that is on the table next to
Izzy.
The camera faces Izzy to see wrapped bleeding bandages on both his hands with some
(fake) blood in the blender.
*
Tai was seen breaking many wooden boards around a dojo with Ash watching.
Tai: Do you Pokemon Trainers understand Ka-ra-te?
Ash: We Pokemon Trainers understand hair-pulling.
Tai: Then, show me.
Ash pulled all of Tai's hair off his head.
Tai: AHHH!!!
Tai ran out of the dojo.
*
Tai was wearing a SeeD Uniform.
Tai: Welcome to this new panel show, its called Final Fantasies 11, with me, as the host,
and my 11 other Fantasy characters, from Aeris to Zell.
Tai was sitting in between 11 Final Fantasy characters, all dressed in SeeD Uniform at
an extremely large table fit for 12 characters, including the host.
*
TK and Matt were at a desk.
Matt: How's mom?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's dad?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's Kari?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's you?
TK: Good.
Matt: How's Tai?
TK: He's all right.
Matt: Good.
*
Sora was watching Tai on his knees.
Tai: Sora, you are the moon, I am the clouds! You can have anything I own. You bring me
all the happiness I need.
Sora stood up.
Sora: I'm convinced, I accept your proposal.
Tai started laughing.
Sora: What's so funny?
Tai: I did it! Its the conversation I'm going to tell Yolei. I was just trying it out on you.
Sora: You nut!
Seconds later, Tai left Sora's apartment with a red hand mark on his face.
*
Izzy was standing infront of a Digi-Port...
Izzy: Digimon. *points at the computer*
*Note: This is an official announcement from Goku's goverment.*
The following people on this list have been thrown overboard:
Yamcha
Phil Pinty
Senator Mimi Tachikawa
Meilin Rae
Madison Taylor
Leo Di Capatated
Katie Windset
Krillin and his US$100, 000 phone bills
Team Rocket
Jessie and James
*
Brock was sitting next to Clair.
Brock: I believe that make up makes a woman who they are.
Clair: That's right.
Brock: So, is that why you're wearing a mask?
Clair angrilly stood up and walked away.
Brock: Check please.
*
Sakura and Li were sitting on a sofa, drinking wine...
Sakura: No no no. We don't treat Yue as a servant.
Li: In fact, we treat him as a normal person, an equal.
Sakura: That's right.
Sakura and Li placed their wine glasses on Yue, who was on his knees on the floor, acting
as the table...
*
P.Oak was standing up.
P.Oak: This is a basic form of exercise for Pokemon researchers. The left arm stretch. Whoa!
P.Oak landed on P.Ivy and Bill while playing Twister on the floor.
*
Kero was standing in the streets of Hong Kong facing the camera...
Kero: Welcome to Kero's people, where I'm going to tell you about the diffrences
between living in Hong Kong and Tokyo. The first person we'll see is a poor homeless man
trying to make a living.
Kero faces Li in the crowd...and Li holds up a tissue paper...
Li: Tissue?
Kero walks to the next person...
Kero: This next one, a mute Chinese woman who tries to ask people to donate money for her
children.
Meiling was holding a sign saying, "Please give me money for my kids."
Kero: No.
Meiling drops the sign to make out another sign, saying "Please?"
Kero: No.
Meiling drops a few more signs saying, "Please"...
Kero: No!
As Kero walks pass Meiling, she takes out one last sign, saying, "Well, SOD you then!"...
Kero: And here, we see a man, trying to make us feel sorry for him with the help of his pet.
Yue was holding a rope...
Yue: Sit. Sit!
Yue pulls the rope, which was tied to a Panda who doesn't want to sit...
*Fox NEWS!!!*
Tai is seen at a newsdesk.
Tai: We interupt this fanfic for an important news report. There is an aromatheraphy
spill in the middle of Downtown Tokyo. One woman, Sakura Kinomoto, was the first person
hospitalised for being induced by this aroma. We would liek to give you more updates but we
took out time. Thank you.
*
Izzy was under some buzzing power lines in the Digi-World...
Izzy: Digimon. *points up.
*
Narrator: What we meet here is one of the richest man in the whole of Asia. He's living a life
of luxury. He has diffrent homes on many continents and he has a home on one cruise ships
where people at his level can enjoy. He is the Professor Oak.
Professor Oak was on a inflatable chair in a swimming pool...
P.Oak was in front of a camera...
P.Oak: Ever since I was young, I always felt that I was diffrent from the other boys...
*School was over and as the other students run off, P.Oak was carrying a checklist*
Narrator: Professor Oak is a very famous Pokemon Scientist.
P.Oak was sitting on a field watching Pokemon when a Pokemon watcher sees P.Oak, puts
his backpack down and watches the Pokemon P.Oak was watching, only to have P.Oak looking at
the Pokemon watcher and then gets up and swipes the backpack...
Narrator: Professor Oak is one of the controversal professors in Pokemon History. He claims
that he is even better than Mew.
P.Oak was sitting on an office chair...
P.Oak: I also even met 4 of the greatest people in history.
*P.Oak was sitting in a room with Madison, Giovanni, Goku and Gennai*
*P.Oak: The path of Pokemon is the path to lunch.*
Narrator: He also created a place for his research, called Celebi's Palace
*The camera is in front of a casino*
Narrator: And now, Professor Oak is now giving out a speech about his new book.
P.Oak was sitting at a table full of books.
P.Oak: Welcome to the showing of my new Book, "Oak's guide on how to be a trainer and still
earn money by eating at Joe's", sponsered by "Joe's". The first point of writing this book is
to give a good guide on being a cheap trainer while making lots of money while battling. And
a last piece of advise, "Hurry up and buy my book!"
*
Kero was in front of a crowd of people in Tokyo...
Kero: As a country like Japan, many people work hard to earn as much money as they can. And
its where technology of the west meets the technology of the east.
Then, Tai walked in from the crowd...
Tai: Television?
Kero: Yes?
Tai: KidsWB?
Kero: Yes.
Tai: Keroberos?
Kero: Yes.
Tai: HEY LOOK! ITS KEROBEROS!!!
Kero: Hold it! This is not live TV!
Tai: Oh. FALSE ALARM!
*
Sakura and Li were next to a car.
Sakura: Yue is just like any normal person we treat.
Li: Yeah, I mean. Holidays without him won't be the same.
Li opens the boot of his car to see Yue carrying all the luggages.
*
Tai is standing in the empty studio.
Tai: Right now, I'm here planning on interviewing the President of the Digi-World, Ken
Ichijouji over his idea of being on radio 24/7. Right through the phone to this studio
is President Ken himself.
A photo of a happy Ken appeared.
*Ken: Hi everybody!*
Tai: Hi, Mr. President. So, Mr. President, how do you propose on the plan on being on the
radio?
*Ken: To tell my rivals to get up themselves.*
Tai: I see. so, any plans on going to your new radio station over the air in the Digi-World?
Its a long trip between Japan and the Digi-World.
*Ken: Yes, hello Tai and hello to all my wonderful, wonderful listeners who will be
tuning their dials in the Digi-World very shortly.*
Tai: So, why the idea?
*Ken: Well Tai, as you know I'm big on loyalty, I pick and stick, and the station made me a
very sticky offer. I still live in Japan, but the postcode has changed.*
Tai: Are you looking forward to working with your close friend Davis Motomiya?
*Ken: Delighted Tai, simply delighted. Shingo, if I can call him that, and I think I can, is
a visionary. And a very, very committed and wealthy visionary at that. We have a partnership
now, in a very loyal, friendly and legally binding sense.*
Tai: Can you give us some insight into your popularity Mr. President?
*Ken: Simple Tai. I represent the common man, the helpless Struggling Street V-Tamer.*
Tai: Most common Monster Tamers aren't on $4 million a year.
*Ken: Let me assure you Tai that it's a very common struggling on 4 million.*
Tai: Any comment on Johto and Kanto's Radio stations before joining the ranks of radio
show hosts?
*Ken: They're amateurs, Tai. Who's going to listen to some rich bloated North-wing
mouthpiece.*
Tai: Thank you Ken.
*Ken: No, thank you Tai. And thanks to my wonderful listeners who stick by me. At times I
feel like an Emperor or a Kaiser.*
Suddenly, a voice spoke out.
*Voice: Look sorry to interrupt. It's President Goku at Goku's house here. Would you mind
repeating that last bit? It's dark in the basement and I'm taking it all down long-hand.*
Tai: I thought the President Goku was only allowed to intercept calls that were a threat to
Anime character's lives and security? You're just tampering with a private communication.
*Voice: There! You said Private. That's all we need. There'll be a full report at Goku's
office in the morning.*
Tai: Ken, are you still there? Back me up.
*Ken: Sorry Tai, I live for my listeners. Where ever they are.*
*
Izzy was dressed as Santa Claus while shaking presents as he each passes one to each
Digimon...
Izzy: Digimon, Digimon, Digimon, Digimon, Digimon.
Then a Cardcaptor and a Pokemon trainer walks to Izzy as he shakes two presents that has
broken stuffs inside...
Izzy: Not Digimon.
*
Kero was in Paris, France.
Kero: Welcome to Kero's people, where I'm in Paris, where we are having an experiment to
see if the Eiffel Tower is really made of steel.
Suddenly Ash was flying with a big magnet as they crashed onto the tower.
Kero: Its a success.
*
At a funeral service. Ash and Sakura were carrying a packet of fish and chips with Tai
crying.
Tai: Why did you have to die, Sora?
Sora was sitting at a bench as Tai was about to walk pass her.
Sora: Tai. I am never letting you name your fish after me.
Then, at the coffin.
Tai: Sora was a good pet goldfish to me. And she was almost like the Sora we still have.
Tai started to cry on Ash's shoulders as Sakura and Ash walks Tai away.
At a house.
Tai, Ash and Sakura were eating fish and chips.
Tai: Why did Sora have to die?
Ash: Well, Sora may have gone to a better place.
Tai sees TK and Kari holding an empty fish tank.
Tai: Kari! TK! You killed Sora! You bastards!
Sakura walks to Kari.
Sakura: Tai is in one of his emotional stages at the moment.
Kari: I know. Tk and I will be out of the house. Remember to lock before you leave.
Sakura: Alright.
Sakura walks back to Tai.
Tai: At least we still have Mr. Tinkles.
Ash: Mr Tinkles?
Tai: The office cat.
Sakura: Well, lets just say that err...
Ash: Have some dim sum, Tai.
Tai took one and ate it as he finds some hair on his tounge.
*
P.Oak: So, basically, the role of Mewtwo doesn't make up for his mental stability, but his
will to live.
Bill: I see.
P.Oak: Professor Ivy, your turn.
P.Ivy pulls out whole pile of blocks, causing the Jenga set to fall over.
*
Sakura and Li were sitting on a sofa.
Sakura: We do not treat Yue as a servant, I mean. We are very high class people.
Li: That's right. We get sattalite TV. CNN, BBC, Bloomberg, Cartoon Network, FoxKids, KidsWB,
Nickleodean.
On Li's remote is connected to a wire, which is connected to Yue on the roof moving the
sattalite dish to get the reception.
*
Tai was at his comfy couch with Ash, Sakura and Izzy at the couch.
Tai: Our next guest is a character who plays Tori Avalon in Cardcaptors, Touya Kinomoto.
Touya entered the studio from the door behind Tai and sits next to Izzy.
Touya: Hi.
Tai: So, Touya. How do you like America?
Touya: Well...
Sakura: He sleep-talks!
Touya: HEY!
Tai: I see. So, how do you like the job as Tori Avalon?
Touya: The...
Ash: It just sucks working for a Canadian company.
Tai: I know.
Touya: But...
Tai: One more question. Are you really gay?
Touya: Well...
Izzy: Its not logical that his hormones are going wild because he thinks he's like a girl
liking a friend named Yukito.
Tai: I see. Thanks for your time, Touya.
Touya: By the way, I met Yamato Ishida down the street and...
Sakura: By the way, Touya also has a doll named Wings.
Ash: Wings? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Izzy: Now that's logically funny!
Tai: It cracks me up!
Touya leaves the studio through the door behind Tai's couch at the same time, behind the
door, a dropping bomb sound is heard but it stopped when Touya closed the door.
*The North Wing*
A picture of Goku's house is seen.
Narrator: The political drama continues on this week's The North Wing.
Davis was seen walking towards his office.
Narrator: Digi-world Vice-President Big Dave Motomiya is angered because he's been elected
as the Vice-President of the Digi-World.
*Davis: It was Ken's decision, nothing else. I couldn't do anything about it.*
Vegeta and Zachery were sitting in a confrence room.
Narrator: Meanwhile, Big Head Vegeta and Big M Yamazaki are discussing about being seen nude
on calender.
*Vegeta: Its a chance to be a humble Vice-President.*
Ken was walking through the Media at a press confrence.
Narrator: But Digi-World President Ken isn't liking the idea of the calenders.
*Ken: I find these images applauding and are complete fakes. They can be easily altered with
the number of people working for President Goku's goverment.*
Goku was at a press confrence.
Narrator: And finally, President Sun Goko comments on Congresswoman Sakura's action.
*Goku: It is very pleasing to you.*
Goku was seen raising his arms up in the air waving.
Narrator: The North Wing. It is the best everyone could do.
*FAQ time!*
Tai was at a desk with some letters.
Tai: We love getting questions here on the show, except for those ones about why we're
still here. Just because we haven't been giving anything any thought over Christmas does
not mean our dedicated readers have been that lazy. Over the break we were inundated with
questions for everything from "Will Giovanni lose it big time and grow a beard like Al Gore?"
to "Why doesn't a plagurist copy an indecent fanfic?"
Tai takes out some papers.
Tai: Here's a selection from our Email:
Jim Kido from Odaiba asks: "Is there any connection between Ken Ichijouji, the the new
President of the DigiWorld, and Barbie's Ken?"
Tai: Why yes Jim, there is. A recent poll found that 65% of Japanese Kids would like their
dream to be any Ken...and vice versa.
Tomoyo Daidouji from Tomoeda in Japan asks: "What's the go with Sakura getting the boot?
She's so hot and she sings pretty good too. And she's heaps hotter than Mimi. Like heaps. So
what if she's messed up in the head. who isn't? I mean, what's up with that?"
Tai: Now Tomoyo...I don't understand your question. If, indeed, that is a question. I
think the answer is to stay in school. Anyway, some people are constantly searching for
answers leads some viewers to write to us in desperation. Like this question:
"I live in the Digi-World and I'm not quite sure what it means now that Ken won the
Presidental election."
Tai: Well, Biyomon of... File Island, as far as you're concerned, it's really neither here
nor there for you is it now?
Oficer Jenny of Vermillion in Kanto asks: "Is it wrong for P. Oak to keep the captured
Pokemon in an enclosed land?"
No Jenny, it's not. As long as they are treated humanely, Which means the paper at the
bottom of the cages is changed daily and they are given a mirror or a ladder to keep them
occupied.
*
Ash: Lets look on what happened recently during the break.
Sakura: Two of the former top executives of SNK have decided to start up a new game company
called KNS.
Ash: Well at least it was better than their other names "S and K", "Let's Go Bankrupt" and
"Hey Moron, Why Not Use All Your Game Credit On Us.".
Sakura: Pokemon scientists researching the Ruins of Alph believe that they have found the
worlds oldest fossilised vomit.
Ash: As expected, it contained the world's oldest fossilised carrot.
Sakura: Japanese free style aerialist Sakura Kinomoto says that diet coke mixed with
crushed bugs helped her recover from a neck injury.
Ash: Sadly her hopes for a medal were ruined when in the middle of her event someone
unexpectedly turned a light on and she had to scurry under a fridge.
Sakura: President Goku has been nominated for President for the third consecutive year.
Ash: This year it's for his stunning work in his home video "Hey Bulma, didn't expect
you home so soon, Vegeta and I are.. training, yes -training.
Sakura: The producers of the Carney the Dino have decided to simplify the show's storylines.
Ash: Hopefully I'll be able to understand their songs.
Sakura: Senator Mimi Tachikawa this week admitted to a reporter that she doesn't know
who Ping Pong is.
Ash: When the reporter told her who she meant she said," Oh King Kong."
Sakura: Sora Takenouchi is to make her stage debut in a play written by Phil Pinty.
Ash:
Takenouchi and Pinty. I smell box office.
Sakura: A new biography of Digi-World President Ken claims he once did cocaine with
The Teenage wolves.
Ash: He also stung Matt for drug dealing.
Sakura: A letter from a clerk has revealed that the names Pallet and Indigo are gay.
Ash: Does this mean we have to rename Pallet Town?
*
Tai: One of the issues raised by the governor-general controversy is the distinction being
drawn between Ken Ichijouji the President of the Digi-World, and the office of the President
of the Digi-World. While Ken Ichijouji has had ample media time, we decided to give his
office the chance to speak.
On the Screen is an empty office with a picture of Ken.
*Office: Thank you Tai.*
Tai: What are your thoughts on the current crisis?
*Office: "Frankly, I'm sick of being dragged into all this mess. Why aren't they going on
about the office of the President of DBZ territory? Lovely chap, more a post really than a
office, but he's hurting.*
Tai: Do you feel your reputation is being diminished?
*Office: I don't have a reputation, Tai. I have a status, an importance, a gravitas.*
Tai: So you disagree with President Goku that kicking President Ken would damage you, the
office.
*Office: He might leave a few fingernail marks in my wall as he's dragged out kicking and
screaming, but essentially I shall remain in mint condition.*
Tai: You'll rise above it all.
*Office: I was having a good chat about this with the office of the President of the DBZ
territory. Basically, we decided that we still command a level of respect, despite what
clowns may do in us.
Tai: What if the Digi-World becomes under the rule of an Emperor again?
*Office: I'll simply apply for the role of the office of the Digimon Emperor. Offices
change jobs all the time you know. The office for the Status of Digimon, for example. Used
to be the Digimon Emperor's kitchen.*
Tai: Finally, office, do you think President Ken will serve out his full term?
*Office: He'll be there as long as the people realise the great and important role the
President plays in the Digi-World.*
Tai: Which means?
*Office: Next Christmas at the latest.*
Tai: Thanks for your time. Is the President's time running out? Sakura has more.
-
Sakura: Thanks Tai. Following the "Ichijouji" scandal, questions are being asked as to how
information filters up to President Ken's aides. I'm here with Senior Department Adviser
Jeri's puppet, Junior Department Adviser Wormmon and Assistant Junior Department
Adviser's Clerk Taichi. Firstly, could I ask you how the reportage process works
in general.
Sakura is seen next to a puppet, Wormmon and Taichi.
Taichi: Well, I collect all relevant data from all sources, double check the veracity and
compile a detailed summary with comments in bullet point form.
Wormmon: I summarise Taichi's summary and distill it in Pencil and email the highlights up
the line.
Puppet: I read the email, delete all the words of more than one syllable, perhaps add a few
pictures to illustrate some of the more difficult concepts and forward it to the puppet in
question.
Sakura: Can you help us understand how the current confusion arose?
Taichi: My initial summary of the situation, which was quite artistic if I say so myself,
went something like - "A Digi-Beetle intercepted a truck-load of refugee Digimon Champions,
Rookies and In-Trainings, which once again has thrown up the need for action, though I
suggest we don't go overboard in our response.
Wormmon: Which was of course far too wordy, so I truncated it into - refugee Digimon
Champions, Rookies and In-Trainings have thrown up the need for action, don't go overboard.
Puppet: But of course that was far too long for a puppet lime me to contemplate, so I
picked out the key-words - In-Training, thrown, overboard.
Sakura: How simple.
Puppet: I almost put, In-Training, thrown up, overboard, but you can't say at the opinion of
a Digi-World with a soundbyte about President Ken's hair.
Sakura: No, I think we get it. Thank you all.
Taichi: Thank you and good night.
Wormmon: Good night.
Puppet: Night.
*The North Wing*
A picture of Goku's house is seen.
Narrator: On the latest issue of the North Wing, President Sun Goko tells us how First Lady
Chichi pleasured him.
Goku is standing at a press confrence.
*Goku: I just wanted to find out what happened in the past 50 years.*
Narrator: At the same time, Senator Mei Meiling Tachikawa went to her first Barney the
Dinosaur concert.
Mimi was standing in front of a camera.
*Mimi: The images are so applading and offensive.*
Narrator: But all is not over yet as Senator Mei Meiling Tachikawa looks at a book done by
Digi-World President, Ken Ichijouji called "The Love of My Life: DigiCrat Style".
Ken was seen at a news confrence.
*Ken: I suppose we could keep it in its original place.*
Narrator: At the same time, Vice-President Big Head Vegetable says that he is on the side
of Digi-World President Ken.
*Vegeta: I swear that I will eridicate every from of prejudice.*
Narrator: The North Wing, it is the best everyone can do.
*
Joe was looking into a microscope.
Joe: Just as I suspected...things.
*
Tai was at the table.
Tai: At this moment, we would like to invite Takato Matsuda and Daisuke Motomiya to join
on the stage to play the rumored new season of CardCaptors Theme.
Davis and Takato were seen on stage and Davis was playing the guitar.
Davis: There're many cards, we could understand them, we sometimes wish its all for fate.
Takato: Its just only just a way, to hide my true feelings.
Davis/Takato: Cause its all just in the cards!
Suddenly, a piano crashed from the above and crushed Takato and Davis.
Back at Tai's desk, Tai was just staring at the stage.
Tai: Now, that's not one thing you would see everyday. Anyway, I have this empty feeling.
This empty feeling that...I should go body pile Clow Reed! LET'S GO!
Tai ran to the back stage, followed by Ash and Sakura, then 3 crew members.
~
As Clow Reed left the toilet, he saw Tai and his crew body piling Clow Reed as Tai jumped
first, followed by Ash, Sakura, then the 3 crew members.
Tai: Alright, back to work.
Tai and the crew ran off, leaving a confused Clow Reed.
*
Tai was coughing.
Tai *a very deep voice*: Sorry, I just accidently eaten something that lowers your voice
instantly, so give me a minute.
Tai took a helium balloon and suck in all the helium.
Tai *normal voice*: Finally, back to my old voice. Expected me to have a very high-pitch
voice, did ya? Over to you Iz.
~
Izzy was next to a landed UFO when it exploded.
~
Tai, Ash and Sakura were watching the explosion at the couch.
Tai: That was another weird one. Anyway, its the end of the show. We expect that you would
keep reading, so I hope to see you again and say hi to your mom for me! BYE!!!
*
[End of fic]
Tai's joke Credits:
Executive Producer: Tai Yagami (That's right, the Tai.)
Assistant Producer: Satoshi Kastumoto and Sakura Kinomoto (The two useless bludgers.)
Make up and costume design: Tomoyo Daidouji (She's good. Really good.)
Runner: Kari Yagami (aka. Mini Yagami)
Editor: Koushiro Izumi (Another useless crewmember)
Camera: Todd the cameraman (Perfect in my closeups.)
Refreshments: Kasumi Yawa (Just ask for milk.)
Sketch creators:
Koushiro "Izzy" Izumi
Madison Taylor
Ash Ketchum
Sakura Avalon
Tai Kamiya
Cast:
Starring:
Ash Ketchum
Tai Kamiya
Sakura Avalon
Other cast:
Misty Waters
Sora Takenouchi
Li Shaoran
Madison Taylor
P.Oak
P.Ivy
Bill
Brock
Izzy
Rika
Jeri
The characters prefer to be in the originals.
Planned by Tai Enterprises with the help of the Daidouji Corperation.
Has no affiliation with: Gamefreaks, Toei, Clamp and the list goes on and on...
Hey!: Whole stole the rest of the credits for this pilot?
To replace the missing credits, here's some Joke Credits:
Fluff
Aeris Gainsburough
President Goku
Big M Yamazaki
Say hi to Matt for me!
Phew...
*Final Scene*
Izzy was in the streets of a Digimon city...
Izzy: Digimon. Digimon. Digimon. Digimon.
Izzy steps on some Digimon poop and as Izzy looks down, he points at it.
Izzy: Digimon.
*
Dedicated to Aeris Gainsburough: Beginning of FF7 to End of FF7 Disk 1
Goon but not forgotten.
*
Tai and Izzy were sitting at a piano.
Tai: Here are for those of you within the Asia-Pacific rim who want to call our new number,
at...
Izzy plays the piano...
Izzy *singing*: 1 411, 811, 8115...
Tai: For those of you who are on International areas who want to call us...
Izzy *singing*: 1 411, 6321, 2423, 7839...
Tai: And for those of you who want to call from another planet like Planet Vegeta...
Izzy *singing*: Pikus 1411, 1 eatus 55, 592, 0000, 700406, 377, 3451, bee bee bop be be bee
pop 4123!
Tai: Errr...yeah.
*
The piano crashed from above and crushed Davis and Takato.
*Truly the end of the fic*