D. N. Angel Fan Fiction ❯ Turquoise Bracelet ❯ I'm Losing Him ( Chapter 18 )

Chapter 18:

 

I'm Losing Him

 

(It's been 2 months since the last chapter)

 

Looking back at himself in the mirror, Satoshi adjusted his tie one last time before he heard Daisuke calling for him from out in the hall, “Hikari! Hurry up! We're gonna be late!”

 

Satoshi had decided against telling Daisuke the truth behind Riku. He wanted to wait a little while longer and gather enough evidence before he bared the breaking truth. “I'm coming.”

 

Satoshi and Daisuke left the apartment and took Satoshi's car to the party. The Haradas were throwing yet another part for Riku and Risa, but mainly for Riku. The family knew all about Daisuke and Riku and since neither of them were making any moves on each other, the family decided to “help” them with it. During the party, the family wanted Daisuke to formally propose to Riku before them. Daisuke had no idea what was going to happen as he got out of Satoshi's car; Riku, on the other hand, who was ogling Daisuke from the window, had been forewarned. In a matter of fact, she was holding the engagement ring that Daisuke is suppose to give to her later.

 

When Satoshi returned from parking the car, he was surprised to see Daisuke standing by the stairs. “Were you waiting for me?” asked Satoshi.

 

“Hikari, I'm,” Daisuke looked around, “eight months pregnant. I need help getting up those stairs.”

 

“Why didn't you ask one of those guys?” Satoshi looked over at the men standing by the stairs.

 

“Because it'll look funny,” Daisuke folded his hands together and looked at the ground.

 

“Let's find another way in,” resting his hand on Daisuke's shoulder, Satoshi led Daisuke away from the front entrance and to the back. There was a gate that opened and the party was on the other side.

 

“Thank you, Hikari,” Daisuke smiled and Satoshi removed his hand.

 

Just then, Riku's parents appeared out of nowhere and wrapped their arms around Daisuke's shoulders. “Good evening, Niwa,” Riku's mom greeted.

 

“How have you been, son?” teased Riku's father.

 

Daisuke was slowly dragged away from Satoshi, “You've been putting on a few pounds,” said Riku's father, “You need to get out more. You know, play ball or do something active.”

 

“When you're eight months pregnant, it's hard to conceal it from others,” thought Daisuke.

 

When Satoshi lost sight of Daisuke in the crowd, somebody else came up from behind him. “Evening!”

 

Satoshi turned around, “Good Evening, Risa.”

 

“Why is Daisuke so fat? Does he drink beer a lot? Is that a beer belly? Is he just lazy? Does he just slouch around all day?”

 

“No, he pregnant. I would never allow Daisuke let himself go like that.”

 

“You should get him back in shape,” Risa gave Satoshi a little punch in the arm, “You know, work him out a bit?” she winked, nudged, and giggled.

 

“I'll pretend that I didn't hear that,” Satoshi began to walk.

 

Risa chased after Satoshi, “Want something to drink to get your mind off Daisuke? I think you need it,” Risa grabbed a glass of white wine from the serving table and handed it to Satoshi, “Drink up.”

 

Taking the glass in his hand, Satoshi took a long gulp; finishing most of the wine.

 

The party was simple. The hired band played multiple pieces that the adult requested, wine was served the whole time, there was a buffet prepared with assortments of different kinds of foods, and desserts too at the same time. Dancing was also taking place on the tile floor. Daisuke was currently dancing with Riku since her parents suddenly vanished, “Daisuke, you need to lose that weight before our wedding.”

 

“I will Riku. It won't be around for much longer. You'll see. In another month, it'll all be gone.”

 

“You plan on losing all that weight in a month? If you pull it off, I'll definitely be impressed,” Riku smiled.

 

“It's all stress, Riku.”

 

After Daisuke finished dancing with Riku, he tried to walk away from her, and while searching for a place to hide from her, he stumbled upon her father again, “Here, loosen up. Have some wine.”

 

Riku's father handed Daisuke some wine, and Daisuke took it. Daisuke, don't drink that! warned Dark.

 

“I'll just be a little sip.”

 

You're a month away from labor day, don't drink the wine. It's alcohol! Alcohol bad for Dai-chan!

 

Daisuke raised the glass to his lips and took a sip. Bad! Bad Daisuke!! Dark screamed, Those are my vessel you're poisoning!

 

“Drink the whole thing,” demanded Riku's father, “Don't waste it.”

 

Daisuke took another sip, then another, and another, and before he knew it, the glass was empty. “Have some more,” he poured more wine in Daisuke's glass, “and when you're finished with that, try some banana rum. It's going around.”

 

“Rum?” Rum?!!! Daisuke! You'll kill them for sure! And with you luck, you're not going to have kids with anyone else! I doubt Satoshi will be able to impregnate you again! Ah! Where is he when you need him?!

 

“See you around,” Riku's father vanished.

 

(Daisuke's POV)

 

“I wonder where Satoshi went,” I asked myself when I finished the second glass on wine, “He'll kill me when he finds out I drank alcohol.”

 

“Who will do what when they find what out?” asked Riku.

 

“Oh, it's nothing. I'm just talking to myself again,” I giggled.

 

“Well then, Daisuke, we need to plan out where we are going to be having our wedding.”

 

“Why are you asking me this all of a sudden?” I asked.

 

“Well…,” Riku went off talking about how we need to plan out a future together and something about kids, but I wasn't really listening. I really needed to know where Satoshi went. Why? I don't even know myself

 

While Riku ranted on about things I could care less about, I crept away and in a second saw a flash of blue hair disappear around the corner of the mansion and into the small garden on the other side. I followed in case it was the person I sought. After all, how many people do I know with blue hair? Sure enough, it was Satoshi. He stood with his back to me while drinking a glass of wine under the moon's light. Just then someone handed me a martini. “Great. What am I suppose to do with this?”

 

“Who's there?” Satoshi turned around to pass me a glance. He closed his eyes then opened them again to narrow them at me.

 

“What is it?” I asked.

 

He turned around and walked towards me. My body tensed and my breathing became heavy with every little step he took closer. “Niwa,” he walked past me, and I relaxed my body for a second. However, as soon as I allowed my guard to drop, I felt a warm hand smooth my arm as it made its way up and coiled around the hand holding the martini, “You shouldn't be drinking,” the voice whispered to me, “Aren't you aware of the risks?”

 

With his other mischievous hand, he coiled it around my waist, “Spill it,” he demanded as his hand slowly began to tilt mine. My hand fidgeted under his as the martini streamed onto the grass, but then I thought of something, “Wait!”

 

His hand relaxed and I turned around in his arms, “We're wasting a perfectly good drink. We… we shouldn't.”

 

A smirk graced his lips, “What are you proposing?” he asked.

 

Cautiously, I slipped my hand from his and slowly moved the glass to his lips, “You could drink it.”

 

“I've already had enough. To drink more would be irresponsible.”

 

“A little more won't hurt,” I traced his lips with the edge of the glass as if using it like a second pair of lips, “Drink.”

 

His tongue came out to gently lick the droplets of alcohol that hung off the edge then his eyes closed as his lips parted. I tilted the glass to allow the remaining martini to flow into his mesmerizing mouth. I wanted to make his drunk for various self satisfying reasons.

 

The stream of liquid soon narrowed into small drops that vanished in his mouth. My cheeks felt flush, and Satoshi opened his eyes just in time to see me fervently gazing at him. “You're really red,” he commented.

 

“I guess he isn't drunk enough,” I said to myself. “It's a pity that there wasn't more,” I said.

 

His eyes narrowed, “Are you trying to get me drunk?” he asked in a sarcastic tone, “If so, you're not doing a good job of it.”

 

“What? I would never do that!”

 

“Liar,” he uncoiled his arm from around my waist, “I'll take this,” he removed the martini glass from my hand and spun around, “Don't drink anymore. Later.”

 

I wanted to chase after him. There was nothing holding me back. He was going into the house alone, and maybe if I did follow him, we could have another moment? “Daisuke?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Oh, I'm so glad that I found you,” Riku's mom said.

 

“Why?”

 

Her right hand dug into her pocket and then she pulled out a small black box, “Here,” she said.

 

I took it from her hand, opened it, and I gasped. Inside was a white gold ring with a grand diamond, “For me?” I asked in confusion.

 

“No, silly, it's for Riku. It was her grandmother's ring, and she treasures it. Her grandmother said she wouldn't allow her to wear it until the day her one true love proposed to her. I want today to be that day. You guys have been dating for years, and it's about time to make another step.”

 

“Marriage?” I gulped. I wasn't sure if I was ready for it, let alone sure if I really loved Riku now. My attention lately has been directly at other more important things other than Riku.

 

She closed the box in my hand and said, “Now would be a more perfect moment than ever. Look,” she pointed to Riku who stood on the stage singing her favorite song, “Now that she is the center of attention.”

 

Being in the position that I was in at the moment, I was unsure of what to do. “Am I really meant to be with Riku? Is this our unavoidable fate? Or is this just another fork in the road of like?” She walked away from me and left me in utter dilemma. I stared at the black box and then I looked up at Riku. She was singing her heart out and trying to attract everyone's attention. It was then that I realized I needed to see Satoshi. I ran into the house to look for him, but suddenly someone grabbed my hand, “Daisuke, it's time.”

 

I turned around and saw Riku's father. Everything was happening so fast I didn't even have time to think. He pulled me through the crowd, towards the stage, and showed me the stairs. If I was to climb, I would be proposing to Riku right here, right now, but if I was to run away, I wouldn't have to fret about this anymore.

 

“Daisuke, is something the matter?”

 

I shook my head reluctantly. Everything in the world was wrong. Riku's parents were forcing me into something I wasn't sure if I was even wanted to commit to. It's almost as if this party was a set up.

 

I climbed the stairs and Satoshi's voice echoed in my mind.

 

Come to me

Like a merciless being

Embrace me with your claws

I want to feel them deep in my skin

Ripping apart my flesh

 

I was now on stage, and the light focused on me as the song ended. I gulped and looked down to avoid eye contact. I was ready to die. I was so nervous. I didn't know what I was going to do, say, or how I was going to act. The thought of running away came back to me, and I was so ready to do it, if I didn't hear her speak, “Daisuke?” she asked in a gentle voice.

 

“How could I do this to her?!” I couldn't back down. “That would be selfish, wouldn't it? I would be taking everything away from her, wouldn't I?”

 

Like a gentle breeze

Whispering softly to me

Be there, hold me, love me, and kill me

 

I could feel Satoshi's eyes on me. I finally looked up to face the crowd, but I couldn't find him. Regardless, I knew he was there… somewhere. I wanted to call out his name. “Daisuke, what are you doing here?” Riku asked.

 

“Go Daisuke!” I heard my friend Saehara cheer from the crowd.

 

If I turned around once again, maybe I would be able to find Satoshi. I should have given it another try.

 

Turn around and see your fate

Crimson tears kiss my face

Like a porcelain doll

I'll fall and break

 

“He'll be so upset. He'll cry. I know he's a seme, but still, he'll cry. I've seen him do so before. He'll fall apart, and I don't want that. I don't want to hurt Satoshi anymore. I want him to be happy. I want him to have what he wants… and I know that's me… He wants me. Can I really be with Riku knowing that?”

 

Let me shatter to pieces

Let me break apart

Let me be the one to die

Yet let me be the only one

You love

 

Riku stepped away from the microphone, and man next to her handed it to me and jumped off the stage. The entire family now had their eyes on me. Eager looks painted themselves on their faces. It was as if they all knew what was going on. This party must've been a set up. “Umm… Hello? Goo… good evening everyone,” my voice cracked and stumbled, “Great party, huh?” I did everything I could to straighten out my voice.

 

“Go Daisuke!” Someone else cheered.

 

Now that I was facing the crowd, maybe I could spot Satoshi, but no luck. He wasn't among them. Any of them. He wasn't here when I needed him the most.

 

(Satoshi's POV)

 

In Risa's room I let her read my fortune with her taro cards, but as soon as she started shuffling the deck, I heard someone cheering Daisuke on outside. I peeked out the window and gasped. “What is it?” asked Risa.

 

“What's Daisuke doing?” I asked Risa.

 

“What?” she looked out too, “I don't know. But there sure are a lot of people watching him. My family never gives an individual so much attention like that.”

 

I kept quiet to hear what he was going to say. “Is he pretending to be a stand up comedian? No. That's not Daisuke's thing.”

 

“Well, I'm not sure if you all know why I am here, on this stage, looking rather nervous. Honestly, a few moments ago I didn't even know I was going to be up here, but here I am,” he giggled a bit, and so did the crowd. I guess they were doing everything possible to make him feel comfortable.

 

“Well, I'll get to the point,” he turned to Riku and touched her hand, “Riku, we've been dating for the last several years. We were high school sweethearts, and we're even making it through college together. You've been talking to me a lot lately about settling down and starting a life together.”

 

My heart raced. Was Daisuke going to do what I think he's going to do? “Daisuke…”

 

“The truth is that I've been giving it a lot of thought lately too. I don't want to be apart from you. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I want to by loyal to just you and I want to start a family with just you. To get right to the point, Riku,” he kneeled, “Will you marry me?”

 

“Daisuke…,” I knew that I never had a chance with him. Though I never accepted it myself, I knew this day would have eventually come, and it did. It's just, I think it came a little too soon. “If that's what you want, Daisuke, then I'll gladly step aside,” I whispered to myself as I walked away from the window.

 

Call me a fallen angel

I'll let you touch my wings

Running your hands through my feathers

I'll whimper and weep

 

“I guess I'll never be able to touch him again. I'll never feel the warmth of his skin again. It's just like before again… He'll pull away from me, and we'll be no more. I'll only have the memories of past events to summon up my joy. I need to accept that I can't have him.”

 

Yet, I wanted him to chase after me.

 

Come to me

Merciless being

My liberator of fear

You'll kill me in your embrace

And bathe in my innocent blood

 

(Daisuke's POV)

 

I remained knelt before Riku. My entire body shook with anxiety. I wanted her to say no, and walk away, but life isn't that simple. It never was and never will be. “Daisuke…,” Riku rested her hand on her stomach, “I can't believe you finally asked. I love you, Daisuke. I want you to know that. I will marry you. I will,” she pulled me up from my knees and kissed me. Her lips burned against mine, and they didn't quite seem to fit. I felt odd. I felt strange. I yearned to push her away.

 

“Where's the ring,” she asked when she finally pulled away.

 

I pulled the ring's box out of my pocket, and I opened it. She gasped and pretended like the ring impressed her, then I took it out and fitted it on her finger. Riku stepped back and admired it for a second before the audience began to clap and cheer. Several immature boys even whistled. I was red from embarrassment. Suddenly, Riku reached into her own pocket and handed me a ring. It fit me just right too. I stepped back and looked at it. White gold with three genuine crystals. “Thank you, Riku,” I tried to sound happy at the least. I am going to be married.

 

Gently caress my wounds

Tend to my special needs

I'm yours and yours alone

Why can't you be mine?

 

However I looked at it, I still felt like a traitor. I felt like I betrayed Satoshi. I felt like I had stabbed him in the back. “I need to find him,” I ran off the stage as Riku's parents came up to congratulate her. I squeezed my way through the crowds, careful not to damage my babies. I soon found myself in the front yard, and I went up to one of the men dressed in a suit and asked, “Did you see a guy with blue hair go by?”

 

“Yes. He just left a few minutes ago.”

 

“Satoshi… no…”

 

(Satoshi's POV)

 

It was like every time I got just a little closer to him, something inevitably happens. Someone or something always managed to take him away from me, but this time was different. There was no possibly way I could ever get him back again.

 

A devil to the heart

You'll destroy what I have built

A sanctuary of hope

Has been shattered apart

 

It was like another jab to the heart.

 

Just spear me with your lance

Hear me scream aloud

Please stop it

 

There was no more to take. There will be no one there anymore to inflict pain onto me. I'll be alone as I once was, except for Krad.

 

I want to live

I want to be here

I want to see your tender face

Resting against my chest

 

But I didn't want just Krad. I didn't want to cry on the shoulder of a sadistic angel. I wanted to rest on only his shoulder. And at the same time, cradle only him in my arms.

 

Why can't I cradle you?

Love you?

And please you?

 

Just as I entered the intersection, my eyes became blurred with tears. So blurred were my eyes that I didn't see the blinding high beams coming my way, nor did I hear the screeching on the brakes before I felt the impact.

 

Why must you hate me?

You are my tender soul

You are my precious love

You are all I have

To sooth my heart

 

A/N: For those who don't want to accept it, yes, another vehicle just rammed itself into Satoshi's car. But is that the end of Satoshi Hikari in this fic? Who knows? But it would make good plot.