Death Note Fan Fiction ❯ PITCH ❯ Pride and Pestulance ( Chapter 13 )

PITCH

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Light x L

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Part 13

 

L is a reclusive detective who takes his job seriously. Too seriously, in fact. Once he takes note of how neglected and stagnant his life truly is, he decides to make some changes. Challenges arise through an unanticipated meeting. AU

 

A/N: Note: 'Pestulance' is a made-up word. Think pestering and pestilence all in one. (Everyone else messes up the English language, why can't I? :D)

 

Also... a little bit after writing part of the beginning of this chapter, I was watching an episode of Dexter (first season) and they did something very similar to a scene I wrote. I was a little peeved to see it had been done before. So, I just felt the need to relate that little tidbit - that it was not something I copied. Is that anal? Ah, well. 

 

Disclaimer: (See part 1 for full disclaimer.)

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Pitch: (def.) 

A substance commonly utilized to bind materials in construction... Tar pitch appears solid, and can be shattered with a hard impact, but it is actually fluid. Pitch flows at room temperature, but extremely slowly. To attain maximum fluidity, to be used, it must be exposed to heat.

 

Minds are like pitch. To reveal their full potential, they must be exposed to environs that apply stress. They must be challenged.

 

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Part 13: (Pride and Pestulance)

 

One sound that Raito felt very strongly about not hearing in the morning, especially when he was sleeping exceedingly well, was the doorbell. 

 

Or was it a gong? A great, giant gong. The noise did resemble one to his sleep-addled brain, but said brain was still aware that he neither owned a gong nor knew anyone who did. Especially not anyone who would be suicidal enough to beat on it in front of his house at.... he checked the clock... at 7 in the morning.

 

"Who is that?" Lawliet asked from beside him, starting to sit up and slide out of his arms.

 

Raito pulled him back down. "Maybe they'll go away," he said in a sleep-roughened voice. "Or realize they must be out of their goddamn mind... this early on a Saturday."

 

Lawliet didn't resist him that hard, sinking back into the bed with him. "Or maybe it's actually important?" the insomniac asked in a dubious voice.

 

"Can't be," Raito said definitively, burying his head in the other man's warm, cotton-covered shoulder. Nothing could be more important than this. It was the second time he'd woken up beside the detective, and he could more than get used to it. 

 

However, the peaceful, content feeling was somewhat shattered by the doorbell and now, the added sound of knocking. 

 

"Are you sure? They seem rather insistent..."

 

Raito sighed. "I'll go throw a shoe or a brick at their head and knock them out. Stay here, I'll be right back." 

 

He slid out of bed with annoyance tweaking at him irritatingly. He knew he couldn't stay in bed forever, and his insomniac certainly wouldn't either, but it had been nice while it lasted. It was probably too much to hope that the day wouldn't start after he got rid of the lunatic at the door. He was fresh out of bricks, and his shoes were too expensive to waste on pest control, but maybe a heavy pan against the side of the head would do.

 

His black robe seemed like a good idea, so he grabbed it on his way out of the room, sliding it on as he walked. He didn't bother tying it and it fluttered heavily against his sides as he moved; he was perfectly prepared to make whomever was at the door as uncomfortable as possible. He was well aware of how he looked in merely boxers - the sight would make most people cower with inadequacy or become stupefied with admiration. Either way, he would crush them for daring to intrude.

 

He tossed his hair out of his eyes as he opened the front door, sending a scathingly bland look at the person who stood there.

 

Confusion hit him the next moment as he saw their face. 

 

"Rai~to!"

 

Good god, no.

 

"What are you doing here?" he asked bluntly.

 

"Eeeee! You look so sexy in that, Raito!" Misa shrilled excitedly, smacking into him with a giant hug. "Misa came to wish you a happy birthday!"

 

Raito pushed her back as she tried to sneak a kiss upon his lips. "You know I don't like mornings. Couldn't this wait?"

 

She smiled coyly at him, and brushed her small hand down his chest. As he looked at her, had to wonder why she was wearing such a long coat, tied tightly at the waist. It wasn't very cold out. 

 

"I remember we used make love in the mornings... " she trailed, advancing upon him in what was intended to be a seductive manner.

 

Raito wanted to smack a palm against his face. Mornings... yes. He could hardly be faulted for that - he was barely conscious then at best. Which made morning sex an easy habit to fall into. Sleepiness could gloss over an amazing number of glaring faults. She had chosen to take it as the compliment it wasn't, however. "Misa," he said patiently, holding her at arms length while she kept moving forward. "You--"

 

Misa untied the sash of her coat, making eyes at him, revealing just how much she was not wearing under it. 

 

The diminutive red lace looked supremely tacky, and was almost dazing in its unabashed statement of 'whore'.

 

It was a dirty tactic, but an effective one - though perhaps not in the intended fashion - the awfulness of it stunned him long enough for her to snake arms around his neck. She stood on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his mouth. 

 

He hated the taste of lipstick. 

 

"Happy Birthday, Raito," she crooned in his ear, her body still pressed against his. Their bare abdomens touched warmly. "I came to help you make this morning a good one..."   

 

Raito wondered what the odds were that Lawliet had actually listened to his suggestion to stay put. Not that he had anticipated this.

 

"Please, Raito? Misa can make you feel good..."

 

And again with the intermittent 3rd-person speech. It was violently unattractive in his opinion. He endured another attempt at a kiss. "Misa, this isn't a good time."

 

"Huh? Why not?" She pouted.

 

Women, Raito scoffed. She was pouting, but in the next moment her eyes were darting sharply to the row of shoes in the entryway. Really, did that innocent 'little girl' act actually work on anyone? It certainly had no effect on him.

 

Her arms slid off of his neck and his shoulders as she looked more closely at the shoes. "You have company?" Her light-colored eyes marked a target on his chest. "Who's here?"

 

"A business associate." Sort of. Well, Lawliet had been a prospective contractor when they'd met the other night... 

 

A somewhat catty expression rose to the surface of Misa's perfectly cherubic face. "Where is he?" She stressed he, as if issuing a challenge. She was very practical about certain things, heterosexual to a fault, but not delusional enough to mistake the pair of masculine shoes in Raito's entryway for a woman's.

 

"In the bedroom," Raito responded unapologetically, confirming both of her suspicions at once. Yes, it's a man and yes, we slept together. He hoped his bluntness would be an acceptable way to make her want to excuse herself.

 

---

 

"Rai~to," the mostly-naked-under-her-coat blonde whined in anguished frustration.

 

L couldn't believe what the young woman was wearing under her beige coat. Rather, what she wasn't wearing. He could, however, hardly be surprised at the way she was throwing herself at the brunet. Red was not her color though, he thought critically. The red lipstick looked especially tacky.

 

Details, details. L was pissed at the way she was plastering herself against Raito and the way the brunet had not avoided both kisses. He was also a bit put out at being described as a business associate. That was a little cold, wasn't it? And avoidant, really, if what Raito said about himself and Misa not being involved was true. So, is he leading her on? Or was he lying to me?

 

L couldn't see Raito's face, but Misa was staring up at it, her expression becoming reluctantly resigned. She played with an edge of the robe at the brunet's hip. "Is it for work?" she asked, as if that were an acceptable detail upon which to curb her jealousy.

 

"A business deal," Raito said, his normally rich voice sounding rather flat. "We're still in the middle of negotiations at the moment..." He said the last three words pointedly.

 

"R-right now?" she stammered.

 

"Right now," the brunet affirmed. He sounded almost lascivious as he said it, though it was subtle.

 

She gave a startled blush and quickly frowned. "I guess I'm interrupting?"

 

"A little," Raito said lightly while still conveying he would rather she left. 

 

How does he do that? L wondered.

 

Still, she was taking it rather well. Was she okay with the thought of Raito sleeping with people he did business with? And why had she had that suspicion even before he'd mentioned it? Had it happened before? L was definitely not alright with that prospect.

 

Raito was walking Misa to the door, but he glanced over his shoulder, meeting L's eyes for a moment. L narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms, leaning against the wall - fully visible if Misa should turn around. Raito leaned down and said something in Misa's ear, which L couldn't overhear, but effectively kept her from trying to look back.

 

"Are you getting together with your family this weekend?" L heard her ask tenuously. Hopefully.

 

"No plans have been made."

 

"Oh." She drooped a little. "Let me know, ok?"

 

"Sure," Raito said, his tone promising nothing while sounding vaguely assuring.

 

With that, she darted forward, kissing him again. Again Raito did not really evade the intimacy. L glared at the back of his head. Unacceptable.

 

The brunet closed and locked the door. He turned around with a baleful expression upon his aristocratic face, meeting L's gaze.

 

L let his expression darken. "Go ahead," L said. "I'm all ears."

 

"Lawliet, it is not what it looks like."

 

"Barring your not so non-relationship status with her, whatever could you mean? Unless... it's the curious way she seemed to think you often sleep with people to get ahead at work?"

 

Raito dragged a hand across his mouth. "I admit, I made a few questionable decisions in the past, but it isn't like I sleep with every business partner I come across. It's just that one or two became more common knowledge than I had hoped, making the relationships untenable and therefore, short-lived. It looks bad, I know it does."

 

L nodded. "It does." 

 

Not only that - were those real relationships that were cut short, or was the brunet actually admitting to...? 

 

"It's all just part of the rumor mill." Raito's voice was falling into cadences that practically caressed one into forgiving. "Don't hold that against me." His gaze was too straightforward as he moved back across the room. 

 

L frowned. "I've seen nothing to discredit such rumors, even had I heard them." I'm not letting you brush this off. L backed up as Raito came into his personal space, and kept a choke-hold on his eyes so they did not wander over all that lovely bare skin. "Are you stringing her along or--?"

 

Raito succeeded in cornering him and leaned in close, his robe falling forward on either side of L. The almost-touch of his skin was so... 

 

"I really like you, Lawliet," Raito breathed against his ear, intensity forming in the words. L's eyes closed against them as they echoed inside of him. He felt them blooming darkly, rivaling his will not to be dragged down any further. Just how badly do I want to believe that? 

 

L turned his head and pushed at the brunet. "Stop it. I can't trust anything you say--" The muscles of Raito's chest were smooth and hard, his skin was invitingly warm. L's hands nearly stuck there, so hard was it to pull them back. 

 

How piteous that I actually want you to mean that and more, and you could be telling me this purely because you've realized that's what I want to hear. 

 

I'm... jealous. 

 

Jealous and angry.

 

This is only an attempt to defuse the situation - to erase what I wasn't supposed to see. But I did see it, and his actions and methodology are as questionable and disturbing as ever. 

 

"Lawliet..." That voice was dark and vibrant. 

 

Raito's hands slid around L's wrists, pulling L's hands down the brunet's tanned abdomen. It was horribly distracting, to say the least. L was still chasing fractured thoughts as his hands were then pressed against the wall to either side of him. "I'm serious, Lawliet," Raito said, stroking him with his own name and moving closer so that their bodies touched. The air became charged in the small space between them. 

 

Fingers twined with his, and soft lips encroached upon him, testing, taking. 

 

Stop it...

 

A soft, clever mouth, moving sensually against his... 

 

Damn you...

 

It was deconstructing his anger and replacing his natural feelings with these foreign ones, particle by particle... Would this clouding pleasure ever die back enough for him to withstand these sorts of things with a bit of sense left? Would these touches always be so steeped in sensation? He struggled to maintain the more familiar territory of his mind.

 

"Do you even know what that means?" Raito asked him, voice like silk, sliding L's hands up over his head and pinning them there, making him feel too exposed. "Do you have any idea?"

 

L's mind clicked emptily like a shutter lens. "What what means?" Distraction and the elusive hold he had on his composure made following Raito's exact train of thought seem impossible. 

 

Raito's cherry-amber eyes demanded his, and their gazes locked. "I like you," the brunet repeated almost curtly, as if saying it again was proving difficult.

 

L blinked back at him owlishly. 

 

Like? What does 'like' entail? And what worth did that word hold to someone like Raito? 

 

L was still hung up on the image of Misa kissing Raito with familiarity, not to mention Raito's off-handed admission to having physical relations with business clientèle. 

 

"Do you also like Misa?" L asked sharply. "Or is it common practice to sleep with anyone who might have a later use to you, regardless of your personal feelings about them?" 

 

He couldn't help the poisonous words. They were seeping out of him and Raito was still too close, amplifying the twisting anger in his chest until it felt black and viscous.

 

Raito's eyes sharpened while still managing the pretense of laziness he often displayed. "That was exceptionally rude of you, Lawliet. One could take that to be an insult."

 

"Do you feel insulted by the truth? Your evasiveness advocates a resounding 'yes'."

 

Raito's hands tightened on his wrists. "You truly have a gift for being unabashedly blunt." His tone was both flowery and biting. He was angry. "At times, it is quite unbecoming."

 

L felt his own face form the beginnings of a glare, breaking the usual monotony of expressionlessness. It was an unconscious reaction, a breach of the poker face that guarded his thoughts so well, and it was as unstoppable as his own words. "How much of a fool do you take me for? Should I believe something is truth simply because you say it is so, and with nothing more to back it up? I don't do blind faith, Raito. I never have and never will." 

 

Amber eyes hardened until they were like flint.

 

L wasn't sure at this point if he was trying to start a fight or not, but the words demanded to be said and they weren't losing momentum, not even at the increasingly stony expression that was stiffening Raito's visage. "Perhaps you are unaccustomed to having your actions questioned, dissected and weighed, but that is the only way I can make proper assessments." L bit back on what threatened to follow, and wrestled with control over his voice. Dampened anger still pervaded his words. "Only -- the more I try to understand you, the less you give me. I'd be blind not to notice that!" 

 

And you would be a fool for expecting me not to see it.

 

By the end, the brunet had disowned L's hands and turned his back upon him. Raito's tensed posture indicated that he was further incensed, which half made L want to kick him and damn the consequences. Why must he be so difficult?

 

"If you were anyone else," Raito said tersely, "you would not be nearly this difficult to deal with." There was a pause, as if the brunet were weighing his words. In the end, he spoke in a tight, clipped manner that reeked of restrained anger and forced calm. "Lawliet, you really piss me off sometimes."

 

"Likewise," L responded.

 

Dropping a bomb in their midst might have had the same effect. L knew that as he swatted Raito's carefully controlled words back at him, but he did it anyway.

 

Raito turned to look at him, almost a pirouette as he pivoted on his heel. His tone was sour, "And yet I think that is partially to blame for why I like you enough to tell you I'm serious about you. Not that you are actually listening to me."

 

It was a much less spectacular display than L was expecting. Raito, if he was not mistaken, was acting conciliatory though it might have been through clenched teeth. 

 

Was he serious? Or was he just serious about making L believe him? 

 

"Is there any particular reason you looked so pained when telling me something like that?" L asked him, safe again behind a blank mask of detached interest, which was hard-won. He held Raito's gaze impassively, as if unaware of the manner in which such a question had to be received, or the sort of challenge it constituted. He played the 'socially inept' card just to see how the brunet would react. 

 

Raito regarded him with a gimlet eye and an impressive frown. "With most people, I'd be allowed to be circumspect. You demand everything be lain out for you in no uncertain terms. It's disconcerting, and it's also annoyingly ironic that you don't even believe me."

 

L sensed the brunet was being open. If he weren't, L doubted he would allow irritation to leak into his voice in such a way. Still, he had to keep in mind that Raito might have accounted for that.

 

"Well, you aren't very convincing." 

   

"What more do you require?" 

 

Raito stared at him unflinchingly. L stared back. It was a somewhat uncomfortable battle of wills. 

 

"I don't know," L said finally. "It is not quantifiable." Even if it were, he hardly saw the point in telling the brunet exactly what to do to procure his trust. That would be like giving a criminal the keys to the city.

 

Raito sighed. "I need coffee. Do you want any, or am I too untrustworthy for that task?"

 

L frowned back at him and followed him into the kitchen. "I never indicated that you were wholly untrustworthy."

 

"You imply it on a multitude of levels," Raito said flatly.

 

"..." Well, it was true that trusting the brunet's intentions or sincerity seemed, at times, the height of folly. However, it was not L's intention to make such a thing unavoidably obvious to the other man. He'd sort of hoped that as time went on, he would be given more reason to relax his guard instead of finding more to make him wary. 

 

L sat down at the small table and watched tanned, articulate hands go about the business of preparing the richly fragrant beverage. 

 

"I do not like Misa," L said, deciding that being almost intolerably forthright might be somewhat fruitful. Perhaps it was also one of the few ways to field an inquiry on trust - airing a source of discontent on the matter. And, yes... it was a bit of a challenge as well.

 

"Perfect," Raito replied, setting a steaming mug of highly sugared coffee on the table before him. "Because I find myself quite disenchanted with Aiber."

 

Staaaaare.

 

"I did not solicit his behavior in any way," L said defensively.

 

"You got drunk with him."

 

"I got drunk on my own," L corrected him. "Meanwhile, you were out on the town with Misa hanging all over you, followed by a rather enthusiastic greeting this morning."

 

"It's my birthday, apparently. I'd forgotten."

 

"Well what a shame that I was here then, or you might have been able to accept her 'present'..."

 

Raito actually cringed (or maybe it was more of a shudder?) before rubbing a hand over his face. "That is really the last thing I would have wanted," he said under his breath. 

 

L regarded him carefully. Maybe Raito was being truthful about his disinterest in Misa? Hope sparked faintly in L's chest. Not that his handling of her didn't leave things to be desired, but it was a start. Perhaps he was just not good at saying no, especially when he could perceive gain from capitulation...? That would be a severe personality flaw, as far as L was concerned, but it was a behavior that could be modified. He could be trained out of it.

 

"What are you thinking about?" Raito asked suspiciously.

 

"Nothing," L said, hiding his enlightened expression behind a large sip of coffee. Severe training.

 

Raito looked skeptical but seemed to decide against pursuing it. "What are the chances that you would be free on Sunday?"

 

L's cup dropped in his hand and he nearly spilled coffee in his surprise. Raito jumped as the liquid sloshed dangerously in his direction. "What is it?" he shot out in a startled, defensive voice. 

 

Regaining control of the coffee, L said, "I'm sorry, did you just ask me if I was free?"

 

"Is there something wrong with that-?" 

 

L set his mug down firmly with both hands and peered at the brunet. Not only was this advance notice, it being Saturday, but he was being actually given an option. "It's abnormal behavior for you. Are you ill?"

 

Raito's look of consternation fast transformed into annoyance. "If you weren't so difficult, I'd be able to ask more frequently instead of demanding it."

 

"...Are you saying that you're afraid I'd decline otherwise?" 

 

"No," Raito said waspishly, looking away in irritation. 

 

L was convinced he was correct, however. "So if I were to tell you that I most definitely will not be free on Sunday, you wouldn't mind?"

 

A reluctant amber eye trailed back to him. "What is Sunday to you?"

 

"Does it matter? An invitation does not necessitate a recounting of my schedule, does it? That would be a rather tedious exchange to expect."

 

Both eyes were on him now. L waited.

 

"Of course not, though it would be considered rude to decline in such a manner." Raito arched a brow imperiously. "It implies that the invitee really has nothing better to do and it denotes a certain lack of class."

 

---

 

Lawliet gazed back at him, unconcerned; his black eyes were flat and unreadable. "Yet, regrettably, that is how I decline such things. Are you certain you should entertain the company of someone so coarse as myself? It may reflect badly upon you." 

 

Deftly, he had turned Raito's ploy back upon itself, not bending to it as he ought to have. Raito ground his teeth in silent irritation. So this is what he got for asking then? The detective was as likely to comply as Raito had anticipated. He seemed to take joy in denying Raito's gestures of consideration. 

 

It was vexing, but also somewhat charming in an insane sort of way. Raito half wanted to smack him and half wanted to drag him over the table and kiss him. 

 

Also, there was a trick to Lawliet's responses... he was trying to accomplish something... It wasn't something so simple as him being discontent with demands as opposed to inquiries on his time, or surely he would have accepted. Was it something to do with that curious look I caught earlier?

 

Raito sighed dramatically and stood up from the table. "Well that's it then, I suppose. I'll have to endure Misa since you are otherwise engaged." He took his mug to the sink so that he could have the luxury of turning his back on his disgruntled companion. A shame, though, he would't have minded another cup of coffee.

 

"And why is that?" Lawliet asked after a stiff moment of silence.

 

Raito began washing his mug. "Oh, it's that silly practice of having a reason to decline, which you don't subscribe to. I don't expect you to understand. Pay it no mind."

 

Raito was surprised when Lawliet's hand descended on his arm, swinging him around. The water was running steadily from the faucet, a background noise that encouraged either of them to shut it off and not allow such waste. Raito smiled at Lawliet as if he were not on the receiving end of an extremely pointed look. "You're going to help me with the dishes?" he said in mock delight as he set the mug down. "How thoughtful!"

 

The grip on his arm increased. "What's on Sunday?"

 

Raito gave him an indulgent look. "If you aren't involved, it's none of your business, now is it?"

 

Anger snapped over Lawliet's face, and it was breathtaking.

 

To be able to affect you so strongly...

 

Even the sting of a blow across Raito's cheek did not diminish his fascination with the dark-haired man's reaction, nor the exciting feel of his jealousy. Lawliet's slight frame was nearly humming with tension, nearly bursting with his need to take back his claims of being busy if only to keep Misa at bay, yet he was unwilling to take that step backwards and relent. His dark eyes were like glowing coals, and Raito had no doubt that Lawliet would have struck out at him again in frustration had Raito not grabbed hold of his wrists.

 

"Just come with me then on Sunday," Raito offered amiably, reeling Lawliet in closer. "You can put off whatever it was you had planned, can't you?" The key was to give Lawliet a way out without giving him a way out. Provide a way for him to give in without relenting. "Please, Lawliet?" He braved leaning closer into the detective's taut body, putting his lips close to the pale column of his throat. The skin was sensitive there, he knew. "I'd rather it was you," he said, nuzzling Lawliet's neck and breathing in the scent of him. 

 

Really, wasn't his reluctant lover just training him to be as demanding as before? This whole asking and waiting for an unknown answer thing seemed to work against them. 

 

"What are you planning to do?" Lawliet's voice wavered. Caught on the touch of lips on skin, perhaps? Or was it uncertainty?

 

Right now? Or on Sunday? Lawliet's question could be taken to mean either thing. Or both. However, he probably intended the latter. "Just say yes, and you'll find out for yourself." Raito found that his voice was becoming more warm, more solicitous than he'd tried to make it. An effect of being pressed up against the object of his desire...?

 

He nipped slightly at the tantalizing flesh of Lawliet's neck, arms snaking around him. It seemed a waste to continue to restrain the detective when his own hands could be put to better use... trailing up the naked curve of Lawliet's back, for instance. Or caging the other man as he was half-heartedly pushed away, though Raito felt the shudder that ran through his slim body as his mouth began to draw upon that pale throat.

 

It must rankle him so, Raito mused hazily, that touch and pleasure could override thought and logic in such ways. It was something that he himself was still getting used to, and he almost felt bad for exploiting it in the other man and making it harder for the intellectual to deal with. 

 

"Raito..." Lawliet's voice was thin. "Are we that interchangeable?"

 

Raito pulled back to look at him, to examine him after such unexpected words. Lawliet's eyes were clenched shut and his hands were balled into fists. "What are you saying? Of course you aren't." Why on earth would he even come to that conclusion?

 

"Don't make it sound so simple!" the detective bit out. "How else am I to take it when your plans would not change either way?"    

 

"I never said that was the case."

 

"Then it's what you would lead me to believe," Lawliet snapped, pushing away from Raito. "God, I can't believe that with someone like you, I--"

 

Whatever the rest of the thought was, it was lost as it dropped into muttering and Lawliet vacated the kitchen.

 

"With someone like me, what?" Raito called out, starting after him. As an afterthought, he rushed back to the sink to slam the faucet off, cursing the amount of time it had been left running unnoticed. "Hey! Lawliet--!

   

---

 

L went straight for Raito's bedroom, grabbing his clothes and putting them on with precision borne of irritation. The routine was becoming almost familiar - sex, sleep, fight, get dressed, storm out.

 

'That with someone like you, I...'

 

Thank god he had not finished that half-cocked thought aloud. It was with dawning horror that he realized what he'd been about to say, and that had really set him off. The cliché of it was abominable. Sickening. 

 

...fell in love.

 

Fall in love? Love?? He didn't even like Raito half the time! How had this insane thought violated the sanctity of his mind?! And it was insane, so insane that he feared recent events must have pushed him off of the deep end. And what would he do? Could he perform his job if he were mentally impaired? Had Raito taken even his means of making a living away from him? What would he tell Watari?

 

He was startled back into the present as he was spun around to face the source of all of his more pressing troubles.

 

"Are you listening to me??" Raito said in exasperation.

 

"Ah... no?" L said, taken completely off guard. How bad was it when you couldn't even hear someone speaking to you?

 

Raito's hands were grasping his shoulders as if to keep him from flitting off. "I was intentionally misleading before," the brunet said reluctantly. "But I did not think you would take it in quite the way you did."

 

There was a long stretch of silence where Raito's red-gold eyes stared at him with intensity, as if willing him to understand or accept something, though they were as sharp and unreadable as a cougar's.

 

L stared back, more confused than ever. "Is this supposed to be an apology of some sort? I'm at a loss."

 

Raito looked as if he were about to start grinding his teeth. "The reason that plans would not change much on Sunday is because it involves my family and unnecessary birthday festivities, of which I am supposed to be unaware." 

 

A tension that had been crackling just beneath L's skin began to dissipate. "Supposed to be unaware?" 

 

"My sister likes to try and surprise me."

 

"But...?" L asked.

 

"She is not very good at it, it's painful to watch, and I feel obligated to indulge her with a reaction. The most useful gift I could receive at this point is the promise I won't have to deal with any of this again in the future. I've asked them all to cease such celebration, as I hardly feel I should be congratulated on not strangling myself in the womb, or managing not to die for another whole year..."

 

"..." L couldn't find anything appropriate to say to all of that. "I do believe, with that, my world outlook appears to be a brighter, cheerier thing than yours." He paused. "I hope you realize how alarming that is."

 

"Nonsense." Raito patted his shoulder with mock encouragement and said, "You should be happy - you're doing better than you thought."

 

L had nothing but a baleful glare in response to that.

 

"So... are you accepting my apology?" Raito prompted.

 

"What apology?" L said. "You haven't actually apologized for anything."

 

"Yes, I did," the brunet insisted lightly, a mischievous smile lurking behind his schooled expression. "Perhaps you weren't listening?"

 

L wasn't sure how or why but Raito was slipping into one of his playful moods. God have mercy on my poor, neglected soul. 

 

"Of course I've been paying attention," L said in exasperation. 

 

Funny though, he felt relieved. Raito's moods were still so capricious to him, and he disliked the feeling of drowning intensity that swamped him when they argued. He was never sure if he would, at some word or action, be forced to just walk away, judging things beyond hope or beyond his skill to deal with. The prospect seemed less and less viable as time passed. Granted, that might be his newfound insanity speaking.

 

"Good, then you also recall agreeing to accompany me on Sunday?" Smirk.

 

"What?!" L could practically have seen something like this coming, and yet he couldn't help his reaction. "No, I most certainly did not."

 

"Come now, Lawliet. Your eyes glazed over with anticipation at the mere mention of it, how could you forget that?"

 

"Horror," L corrected, annunciating each syllable to utmost effect. "Glazed with horror." Speaking of insanity... what was it he'd thought while trapped at the dinner table with Raito's family not so long ago? Oh yes. That they were all crazy, the sister was likely crazy, that Raito was the cause of it all, and that it was likely contagious. "Why do you want to torture me? I didn't enjoy it the last time I spent over there."

 

"What about after?" the brunet said suggestively.

 

L felt the color rise in his cheeks. He was shameless! Actually daring to wink at him as well! "The reckless driving, the fear for my life, or you threatening the well-being of my cell phone?"

 

Raito tilted his head as if to consider. "I do believe you left quite a lot of other things out." He smiled benignly, all haloed innocence and light. "For instance, the cause of that blush..." he indicated the one currently riding L's face. "If you've forgotten the specifics, I'm sure I could recount it to you in exorbitant detail." The smile widened, becoming less angelic and more demonic by the second. "After all, I have a vivid memory."

"My memory is flawless, so it is quite unnecessary--"

 

"Oh, where should I begin?" Raito mused. "In the car, outside of my parent's house? Hmm... but then there was a before and after we actually went inside..."

 

L bit his lip. He was being made painfully aware of how thoroughly he'd pushed certain things from his mind. 

 

Oh, the many times he'd almost died of mortification in the brunet's presence... The many heady, scandalous kisses, the roving hands, and the cloying, disorienting feeling of lust... The car, it would start there, then surely Raito would mention trapping him in his parent's bathroom, set on ravishing him then and there despite L's pleas. After that, there were far too many instances that had occurred in this very house... so many instances of skin against skin, the sinful pleasure of hot, naked flesh and hotter mouths...

 

"It seems perhaps you do remember," Raito murmured as his hand slipped beneath L's chin, tilting his face up to receive a debilitating kiss. 

 

There was absolutely nothing chaste about it, every movement being as dirty and provocative as possible - smearing that angelic image Raito liked to play out. Any halo he might have worn would have tarnished, blackened and crumbled down upon them.

 

"Shall I continue?" Raito asked in a roughened voice, lavishing attention upon L's neck in a way that was making it difficult to keep his knees from buckling. "Or are you going to keep making such irresistible faces?"

 

L flushed. "I-I'm not..." Had something shown on his face? He hadn't meant it to, but remaining stone-faced while recalling such intimacies was difficult, even for him. "And no, do not continue, I don't want to hear it!"

 

"You don't want to know what you sound like when you c--?"

 

"NO." L cut him off by clapping his hands over Raito's sensuous mouth. 

 

His eyes were laughing.

 

Raito shrugged, and lapped at the palm of L's hand with a flick of his clever tongue. L recoiled in violated surprise, clutching his hand to his chest. 

 

Raito smirked in triumph. "No? Then do something I want, Lawliet."

 

"...what?" L asked cautiosly.

 

"Suffer my family with me," Raito said in dramatic entreaty. "Can you not see it as a sign of favor that I would ask you to do it instead of someone else?"

 

"Not really, no," L said stubbornly. Sign of favor, my ass. I'm probably just more fun to torture.

 

"My sister always asks if Misa is coming..." L twitched. Misa. He'd heard that name more than enough to last him a lifetime. Now I have to compete with her not only for Raito, but for Raito's family's approval as well?? "But I don't think she actually likes her," Raito finished. His eyes roved over L's face, drinking in whatever traces of frustrated jealousy L was unable to keep from manifesting. "I'm sure she'd like you, though."

 

"Is that supposed to convince me? I'm still reeling from the announcement you made at dinner the last time - that you were sleeping with me!"

 

"Too direct? I'm sorry, it just sort of popped out."

 

"See that just now?" L said, ignoring the ludicrous notion of something like that just 'popping out' in favor of making a point. (Besides, dwelling upon things like that, he'd just get a headache.) "That was what one would consider an apology." Though not a very good one...

 

It was a not-so-subtle demand for a remedy of the failed apology from earlier.

 

Raito gave him an imperious look. "Very well. I apologize, Lawliet, for trying to make you jealous in an attempt to secure your attendance at my parents' house tomorrow night when I should have just found a way to force you into it in the first place, instead of asking you, which might have saved us both a lot of unnecessary trouble."

 

"..." And so L found himself unable to say anything in response. It was just too impressively riddled with wrong that he couldn't even touch it; he wouldn't have known where to begin. Instead, he announced that he was going home to deal with his migraine and agreed to anything that would let him do just that.

 

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TBC